"S-sorry," Mello says quietly, and yet he still doesn't let go, but he thinks he can't take his eyes off L's face, and it's Matt who speaks up instead.
"Mello," he says, still fully dressed and peering at him from breside the desk, and then, lowering his voice, "L wants to-you know-"
His eyes roll up to look at the older boy, and then back down at Mello's hands, and he doesn't say any more because L knows everything anyway.
Mello continues staring at L, transfixed, lips brushing gently against the still-hard member at his mouth, until, very slowly, he feels Matt's fingers wrap around his hand.
"Let me-"
This seems to break the spell, and Mello flips his head in Matt's direction.
"What are-"
"Sorry, L," he says, then proceeds to take him into his mouth, but Mello pushes him away.
"What do you think you're doing...?"
"I-"
"You've already had-"
"I-I wanted to again and-"
"Well, you can't now, cause now I'm-"
Then Matt takes the member between his lips, despite Mello's hand wrapped possessively around it, and despite being tired and on the verge of injury, Mello pushes him away, gritting his teeth, and begins fighting him for it, to L's vast amusement.
L allows this to go on for several minutes until he thinks he's had enough, and then down come the palms of his hands on top of their heads and he draws them back.
"While I can't help feeling flattered by this charming rivalry, I think that Mello had something else in mind."
Mello and Matt look up, each with one hand still grasping him selfishly.
"Move it, Matt," Mello deadpans, not taking his eyes off L.
"You too, Mello," L says quietly, and finally they both let go.
"Mello doesn't want it gentle, does he," L asks quietly, sliding off the desk and letting go of the leash.
"I want it any way you want to give it to me," Mello hears himself murmur, but L knows better.
"Hey, Mello," Matt asked once upon a time when they were doing homework in the lounge, "How do you change the size of the font on your computer?"
He was scrolling through his laptop, trying to access a file for class.
Mello glanced over; the font was nearly microscopic, and Matt must have done something to make it that way and now he didn't remember what.
"Let me see," Mello said, putting down the game he was holding and pushing his friend away from the chair. It was one of those puzzles made of metal wires tangled up in complex ways that you had to unravel, and Mello had nearly gotten it figured out, and when he had it figured out, he was going to show it to L, and L was going to be very proud of him because this puzzle was supposed to be hard.
"Okay, so," he said, finger on the mouse pad, "I'm guessing you go to settings….um…" he proceeded to open the control panel when he noticed Matt reaching for the puzzle.
"Don't," he said, reaching for it, "I've almost got it solved."
"Heh. That's what you said last night."
"Yeah well, I thought I was gonna solve it last night. Come on, give it," he said, now turning his head toward the younger boy in agitation and reaching for the thing.
"I won't change it, I'm just looking."
"Matt—"
Then came the sound of voices approaching, and both boys turned their heads to the door to see if it was L, in which case Mello needed to hide the puzzle because he wasn't going to tell him he was working on it until he figured it out.
"Give it," he hissed, grabbing it from Matt's hands with his eyes still fixed on the entrance, but it turned out it wasn't L – it was just Roger and one of the instructors.
"Good," Mello said, but part of him was disappointed, and part of him kind of wanted L to know he was working on the puzzle in order to show him how good he was at solving it.
Still now, Mello finds himself perpetually wishing that L would walk into the room while he's doing projects, and still now he wishes that L would know that Mello is solving puzzles in order to show him how good he is at solving them.
And even now, delirious with love and arousal and pain, part of him is cognizant enough to feel self conscious that he's reduced merely to infatuation and lust, but he knows that L knows better.
"Oh, there he is," Mello exclaimed, putting down his fork and practically leaping out of his seat.
Matt watched him trot across the dining room, finished puzzle in his hand, to the entrance, where L and Watari have just come in.
It took him a few hours more to solve it, and he had it with him at dinner.
"L!" Mello said, face flushed from running and eyes beaming in satisfaction, "look, look at this."
L and Watari stopped and L waved to him, and Matt watched from the table as Mello held the puzzle up to L and explained it and showed him how it used to be and how he solved it, and then he let L take it and L was smiling and probably asking him stuff, Matt really couldn't hear and, really, he didn't care, and he wondered if he should care, but really he thought he only cared about how happy Mello seemed to be and how funny his hair looked bouncing like that when he ran.
Mello still looks funny, Matt thinks, with his long hair and his wicked smile, and Matt loves how he looks, because really, he thinks the funny way Mello looks is very sexy. And it's with absolute amusement that Matt watches L take Mello's right leg in his hand and, looking directly at him, bring him against the wall.
Matt thinks he's never seen Mello put such blind trust in anyone. Mello wraps his arms around L's slender neck and presses his head back when it goes in, and, one palm flat against the wall, L thrusts hard against him, and Mello's breath comes fast and desperate, hands tightening around the older boy and fingers running tentatively against the white skin and through his soft hair.
His curiosity about Kira seems to have faded, and now he can barely think at all, and all he can do is stare into L's eyes with pure admiration, thinking that L is perfect, L really is perfect.
Is it okay to kiss him? He wonders, and while he's actually kissed him already, that still doesn't mean that it's okay.
"Mello likes these puzzles?"
"Yeah, and this, this one, at first it was like this—" Matt watched Mello make a curved motion with his finger to show how the loops and turns were hooked at the beginning, "and at first I thought you have to move it this way, but then it turns out what you have to do is first you have to move it like this—"
Matt watched as L nodded in genuine curiosity, and he could tell that he really was impressed, and ultimately L told Mello that it really is very hard to solve these puzzles and Mello seemed to beam with absolute ecstasy when L asked if he could keep it and try to get it back to the way it was at the beginning.
And when, flushed and excited and out of breath, Mello returned at last to the table, Matt smiled around his fork and asked Mello how it went. "Oh, man, awesome, it was totally sweet, did you see how he like—and—and I gave him the puzzle so he can solve it too." Matt let Mello keep talking for a while, but he wasn't really listening, because it was more interesting to look at how excited and cute he was when he talked like that and also there were curly fries tonight and Matt liked those, and actually he ate Mello's after he finished his own, but Mello didn't seem to mind.
Mello still looks very cute now, when, flushed and excited, he smiles at L with infinite fascination, and L smiles back, moving against him without the roughness and sadistic cruelty that Mello might have wanted, but with the same gentle affection that L showed him many years ago when, drawing back the blinds that warm night, he grinned and said, "see you in the morning."
And at last, Mello moves closer to L, and like he's always wanted to, he covers him with kisses, and L closes his eyes and laughs, losing his concentration and almost losing hold of Mello's leg.
"That's cute," Matt thinks, playing with the twisted end of a pen cap he's been chewing, and he wonders what they should have for dinner afterward, and also he thinks he wants to screw Mello later that night because Mello looks really sexy.
To be continued…