With Darkness as Our Blanket
- by BiSciFiGuy –
Pairing: Harry p. & Draco M.
Genre: Drama/Romance
Rating: M (Violence and Gay Themes)
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters or character histories or places or anything except my own plot. No copyright infringement is intended. I am not responsible for any underage readers who come across this story.
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A/N: I apologise for the lateness of this update, I couldn't write anything for more than a week since my Computer died (although I think I may have murdered it in some way) but anyway, its back in the world of electronic life so I should be finished soon. Thanks for bearing with me.
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Chapter 12 – Revelations Part Two
Two days had passed since the group of friends had returned from St Mungo's. Two days that had at first been quite normal, even fun. But they had soon become days filled with tension so thick one almost had to wade through it as though it were thick cream that filled the apartment. And to be quite honest, Draco, Ginny and Seamus all blamed Harry for the uncomfortable silences and the air of disappointment.
Draco had been the first to notice the change in Harry, it made itself known the moment they returned from the hospital. Harry had suddenly become sullen and depressed while everyone else in the apartment was overly excited at the prospect that Ginny was most probably pregnant at that very moment. Harry's heart didn't seem to be in the whole situation and Draco had found it strange. This was after all what Harry had wanted most, what they had both wanted. Later that day as they decided to take afternoon naps Draco had tried to coax the problem out of Harry but the Gryffindor stood steadfast and refused to budge. Draco knew better than to keep on prodding him and they settled into an awkward embrace on the bed. Draco had felt the tension in Harry' s body, as though he were expecting something terrifying to happen at any moment.
Dinner that night also turned out to be an odd affair. Ginny and Draco discussed the baby, and all the possible names that he and Harry might like. They tried to pull Harry into the conversation but he seemed to be lost in thought for most of the night, staring off at nothing. Seamus seemed distracted as well but both Draco and Ginny chose to push the curious behaviours of their lovers to the backs of their minds. Dinner was hardly over when Harry excused himself and left the table with only a few mumbled words.
"I'm going for a walk, I'll be back later". With the soft slam of the door the brunette was gone, leaving the rest of the group to stare at his empty spot.
"I think I'm going out for a walk too". Seamus said about ten minutes later and got only silent nods in reply from the two jabbering people at the table. As soon as they heard the door close behind Seamus they forgot all other conversation.
"What is wrong with them, did you see the way they were here but not really here all night?" Ginny whispered, as though Harry or Seamus were still in the apartment.
"Yes, Harry has been like that since we got back from the hospital".
"Seamus too, do you think something happened while we were there". Ginny worriedly bit her lower lip as she caressed her wine glass in a strangely masturbatory fashion.
"I don't know, it can't be because of the fight. Harry seemed completely fine about it after he woke up and Doctor Bailey said it would be unlikely that he'd have delayed shock or anything like that".
"She said the same about Seamus. Something must have happened at the hospital, do you remember anything odd?" Ginny asked Draco and the blonde was ashamed to feel a strange twinge of suspicion make itself known inside his chest. He pulled himself close to Ginny, their legs entwining and he clutched her hand.
"I know this is going to sound insane but", he took a deep breath, almost reconsidering what he thought, deep down he knew he might be over reacting but the little bubble of doubt in his heart refused to give way.
"After Harry woke up, the first thing he thought about was that young Doctor, you know, Doctor George?" Ginny nodded, her face still confused.
"And Harry was really eager to see him from the moment we got news that he was okay, he was almost frantic to get to the room". Comprehension finally dawned on Ginny and she violently shook her head. She pulled them both up from the dining chairs and with wine glasses in hand they went to the couch and settled on it, again entwined in each other, the way only truly close friends would sit.
"There's no way that Harry is cheating on you Draco, he loves you, you were only bonded a week ago for Merlin's sake".
"I know, but I can't help worrying that maybe, just maybe something was going on. When he hugged Doctor George it was almost as though he couldn't bare to let go".
"That's just how Harry is Draco, he is dependant on contact, he thrives on it. It reassures him". They sat in silence for several minutes, Draco mulling over her words, he knew he should just let it go, just trust Harry but some childish part of him refused to let go.
"Ginny, what if this is the same as with that Chinese boy down the street?"
"Tai kissed Harry, you know this Draco, Harry never felt anything for the boy".
"Then why is he so distant, what if he's having doubts about bonding with me. What if he wants to start going out with Doctor George?" Another disturbing thought struck him then.
"What if he wants to leave me for George because George and Cedric were together once, he could still love Cedric and use George as a substitute". Draco started to feel his chest heave, his breath caught in his throat and his heart began to pound in his head, his brain beating against his skull. Ginny reached over and took his hands, rubbing them vigorously with her own.
"Just calm down Draco, Harry would never cheat, I know this. He loves you way too much okay".
"Okay". Draco answered even though he still didn't quite believe the words.
***
Harry felt as though the dining room walls were closing in on him, the table he was sitting at had suddenly become some monster that could swallow him in one gulp at any moment. He looked at Draco across the table and saw his gorgeous blonde lover happily discuss the baby Ginny was hopefully carrying for them, he knew he was happy about all that had happened but the happiness felt forced. All his feelings seemed to be waiting eagerly on his skin to enter his body, but his heart refused to let them in. Draco's face was glowing in the soft candle light and Harry saw that the blonde was truly happy, he was content to live his life with Harry. The brunette felt a deep twinge of guilt that chased the happy feelings away even farther. The entire room felt much too small all of a sudden and he was glad when they were done and the dishes began to float away. His chest constricted and he almost gasped, as though he had been frightened by someone when he came around a corner. He needed to go see Hermione, he needed to talk to her… but first he needed to calm down, he needed to get his thoughts in order before he spoke to her. He stood up quickly, nearly toppling the chair behind him. His friends' faces looked up at him and he tried to smile and tell them where he was going. He was amazed at how old and defeated his voice sounded.
"I'm going for a walk, I'll be back later". He nearly ran to the door.
As he closed the door behind him he felt relief flood over him, even though it only lasted for a second before the new emptiness settled in his heart again. He began to walk, there was a little park not far from his apartment where he knew he could go to think, he'd been there many times in the first months after the attack at the school, had been there many times before he went to visit with Hermione. He felt he owed it to her to have his mind straight whenever he talked to her.
The streets were pretty much abandoned as he walked onto the second block from the apartment, the little park was nearly in sight and he felt the emptiness inside him begin to lift slightly. He'd shed so many tears there, sitting in the darkness on a hard iron bench next to the pond. A big willow tree stood a ways behind the bench and it's long rope-like branches hung down over it, pretty effectively hiding the bench from sight. Only those who stumbled upon it by chance seemed to know about its existence, the garbage bin beside the bench contained nothing but a single ball of discarded gift wrapping paper, the kind with little candy canes on them that suggested that the bin had last been emptied the previous Christmas. Harry pulled apart the branches of the tree like a curtain and settled himself on the bench. The water from the little stream that fed the pond made happy gurgling noises as it tumbled down the small waterfall. Somewhere in the top branches of the tree something was moving, probably some animal Harry had disturbed with his entrance into the cavern created by the branches.
The moment he felt his body mould itself to the bench he also felt his carefully constructed mental walls give way and he quickly cast a silencing charms inside the branches before a loud choking sob escaped his throat. It echoed in his ears and he almost laughed at how pathetic it sounded, but the first sob seemed to cause all the rest he had pent up for so long to come rushing out of him in explosions of animalistic sounds that tore at his throat. He dropped to his knees in front of the bench and struck the ground with his fist, the sudden pain from the impact seemed to soothe the pain in his heart for a moment.
"Why?" He cried out into the branches.
"I can't do this, I don't want to die. Not now, I love Draco too much". His injured throat made his voice crack, another sob burst from him but the tears never came. It seemed as though his eyes refused to give in to the weakness. All different kinds of emotion bubbled out of Harry as he pounded his fists into the ground again and again, not feeling how the tiny rocks and sticks hidden between the blades of grass cut into his flesh. He drove his fists down one last time.
"FUCK!" He cried, hearing as his ragged voice broke from the strain.
"Harry, Merlin Harry, are you okay". Harry's head jerked up as he saw Seamus burst through the leaf curtain. His friend rushed to him.
"I'm fine Seamus". Harry said as Seamus dropped down on the grass beside him.
"You didn't sound fine Harry, what's wrong".
"I'm fine really". Harry said and Seamus leaned in to give him a one armed hug, this proved to be the one unbalanced brick that toppled the walls that kept Harry's emotions contained.
"No, I'm lying. I'm not okay". The words tumbled from his mouth and he leaned in, feeling Seamus bring his other arm around him and he cried. Feeling all the emotions he'd kept inside flood out of him. He clutched at Seamus' back and right arm as he felt himself shake, big tears spilling from his eyes and wetting Seamus' shirt. All the while Seamus kept running his hands up and down Harry's back, soothing him as best he could. Harry's sobs died down but he remained in Seamus' arms, feeling safe in the strong arms of the Irishman. Silence took over again as the aftermath of Harry's emotional outburst faded and he could hear the stream again, the animal in the tree also began to move about again and Harry felt distinctly upset that he had probably frightened it.
"What happened to your hands?" Seamus asked him softly and Harry pulled back from the other man. He looked down at his hands and saw that they were pretty much shredded, cuts of every imaginable depth were scattered over his fingers and blood dripped to the grass, and onto Seamus' clothes and down Harry's arms.
"I… I had a scuffle with the earth… and the earth won". Both young men smiled at the dry piece of humour and Seamus took Harry's hand in one of his own, much bigger hands and pulled out his wand. As he carefully began to heal the wounds Harry looked up at him, seeing the light green eyes flicker in the moonlight and he thought of Ron, his best friend for so long, the one who had stood by him through so much, the one who had willingly let a gigantic Chess piece almost kill him during their first year simply because he believed in Harry and had wanted to help him, the one who had been there till the end, the one who was…
Harry could never complete the sentence when his thoughts drifted towards his old best mate, what had happened to Ron had been so terrible and simply thinking about it made Harry's skin crawl and some other kind of sadness pop up deep within him.
He felt as the wounds healed and Seamus gave him back his hand. As the silence drew on Harry felt his mind linger more and more on what he knew was going to happen in six days.
"I have The Creep". He blurted out into the silence, not daring to look at Seamus. He heard his friend's sudden sharp intake of breath but Seamus never turned his head to look at Harry either, they simply sat next to each other, staring out towards the lake.
"How long do you have left?"
"Six days, well four if you take into account that I'll be in a coma for the last two".
"How long have you known?"
"Since the day Draco moved in". They sat in silence for several minutes again.
"Is that why you bonded with him, just so you wouldn't be alone?"
"No, I didn't want anything romantic to happen with us, I tried my best to avoid it but it was there and I couldn't stop what was happening, I guess I never stopped loving him and when he came back all the feelings we once had for each other came rushing back too". Harry felt Seamus' hand gently come to rest on his knee, he placed his own hand over his friend's and they sat, the water still flowing merrily on its way into the pond.
"I take it Draco doesn't know?"
"No, I want to keep it quiet as long as I can".
"Why?"
"Because I love him". Seamus nodded.
***
Harry had gone back the apartment with Seamus that night to find a different Draco than the one he was used to, this Draco was much more guarded, and seemed suspicious of something though Harry couldn't fathom of what or why. He thought that perhaps it was his imagination, that he was simply projecting his bad mood onto the Slytherin.
His theory was disproved when they went to bed however, he and Draco had silent almost awkward sex that seemed to last forever. One would have thought that since it was their first night together as a bonded couple it would be wild but to Harry it felt forced, as though they were simply doing it because it was what was expected of them. Draco came first and Harry felt the insane urge to fake an orgasm just so the sex could be over and done with. He came for real soon after but even his ejaculation seemed uninterested as he felt himself squirt feebly and he lost his erection in what seemed like a second after he was spent. He pulled out of Draco and they each settled on opposite sides of the bed, the usual cuddling clearly off limits.
When Harry had woken the next morning his first though had been that counting that day, he only had five days left to life, three days until he went into the inevitable coma. Seamus had thankfully kept his word and hadn't breathed even the slightest hint to the other two apartment occupants. At breakfast that morning Harry pitied Ginny, she was the only happy one and she worked really hard to cheer up the men in her life. Seamus barely spoke since he was clearly still in shock over what he'd heard the previous night and something was hanging in the air between Harry and Draco. She secretly hoped that Draco hadn't accused Harry of cheating, knowing what a big injury it would be to Harry to be suspected of something like that.
"We might find out about the baby today, isn't it exciting?" She asked and barely got any response from the men. She felt her resolve crack a little but set her face, determined to break the dreary spell around the table.
"I was thinking about going to see my Mother for a bit today, would any of you like to come along?".
"No thanks". Draco whispered as he sipped his coffee.
"I…don't think so Ginny". Harry mumbled.
"Whatever you want Honey". Seamus replied. All three men were purposely avoiding each other, or at the very least avoiding eye contact.
"How about I go visit my Parents and you boys go out and do something fun huh?". Ginny tried again, surely she could make them see they were being silly, whatever the reason for the tight atmosphere was surely it could be resolved, they were all grown ups after all.
"I'm too tired to go anywhere thanks".
"The last boys night didn't go so well, so I'd rather avoid more trouble".
"Not really in the mood Honey". Ginny stared down at the three of them and felt all her resolve give way and go crashing down around her feet. The depressed mood in the kitchen seemed to be contagious and she stalked off to her room. She needed to let her mother know she was going to visit them.
When Ginny left a renewed, even heavier silence fell on the room, again trying its absolute best to choke the people within. All three men stood up simultaneously and spoke almost as one.
"I'm going to bed again".
"I have to go help Ginny".
"I'm going to catch some air".
They looked at each other without really looking and departed from the room, each going in his own direction. When he saw his two friends disappear into their respective rooms Harry made his way to the fire place and proceeded to use the Floo network.
***
Harry felt as though he were carrying all the world's problems on his shoulders as he stepped out of the big fire place and looked up at the familiar old building. His mood lifted slightly as he made his way over the thick grass to his regular spot next to Hermione. He noticed several other visitors as he walked by, some of them seemed to recognise him but no one made any attempt to come near him. He held his head down until he reached his friend and lowered himself silently to the ground, hoping he wasn't making too much noise.
"You look terrible".
"Thanks Hermione, that's certainly the perfect way to cheer someone up".
"I wasn't trying to cheer you up, I was merely making an observation".
"Yeah well, I guess your observation is pretty accurate then".
"What happened?". Harry proceeded to tell her about the bonding, the attack, the closeness of his impending death and even the horrible sex he and Draco had had the previous night. She listened sympathetically.
"Why did you tell Seamus?"
"I don't know, I just couldn't keep it quiet anymore".
"So why didn't you tell Draco the truth. He deserves to know much more than Seamus does".
"Seamus is my friend too Hermione, and he was there when I needed him".
"Draco would have been there too, if only you weren't trying to push him away now that you feel death coming close".
"I'm not pushing him away Hermione, I just want to keep him safe".
"Harry, when you think you are protecting people, you actually push them away, I know you think it's a good idea but really it isn't, you are just going to hurt him more than you are going too when you die".
"If I tell him Hermione, then our whole relationship is going to fall apart".
"Your relationship is already falling apart".
Harry was about to reply when he heard a cracking sound behind him and he instinctively knew who it was. He turned himself around just in time to see a flash of blonde hair and shocked, tearful grey eyes before Draco vanished behind the green flames in the floo.
"Oh Merlin". He groaned as he pulled himself up off the ground.
"I have to go Hermione, I… I…"
"Its okay Harry, I know you can never come back again".
"I'm sorry".
"Don't be, this was how it was meant to be".
"Goodbye Hermione".
"Goodbye Harry, be good to Draco. I love you".
"I love you too". As Harry ran to the floo he felt the bond he had built up in this place slowly begin to fade, he'd always known he'd have to end it eventually but he'd always thought it would be on his terms. Tears were already forming in his eyes and he caught one blurred glimpse of the Hogwarts Castle as he tossed the floo powder at his feet.
When he stepped out of the flames he could almost feel Draco's fury as though it were flooding through the apartment, it seemed to be clinging to the walls and soaking into the carpets. The blonde was sitting on the old couch, his eyes wet but furious as they focussed on Harry.
"Draco, I'm sorry…"
"You're sorry, fuck Harry, how could you do that, are you bloody insane".
"I am not insane Draco, for Merlin's sake. I just needed someone to talk too".
"You didn't need to go speak to her Harry, shit, do you know how it looked, how it made me feel to see you sitting there on the grass chatting to… chatting to that… that". Draco shook his head violently as though he couldn't find the words to express what he was feeling. He paraded up and down in front of the couch like some caged animal. Seamus appeared in the doorway and was about to speak but Draco silenced him with one look. He stayed in the doorway however, knowing that a fight between Harry and Draco could turn dangerous at any moment.
"I know Draco but I started doing it after the attack, Merlin, you can't imagine how I felt after what happened, I was so empty and there was no one left".
"I was there Harry, I never left, it was you who made the choice to leave, it was your choice to cut me out of your life".
"Fuck you Draco. I was trying to get my head straight, I needed someone to sort it out with, I needed someone who would understand what I was going through".
"You could have come to one of us, Harry, what you are doing is not healthy, its simply fucking stupid". Harry's eyes flashed with anger.
"I was alone here, yes I made the choice to leave because I couldn't bare to look at all the pain those bastards caused. It doesn't matter that I killed Voldemort, it wouldn't even have mattered if I'd killed him a thousand times over, it still wouldn't have brought back all the people we lost. Voldemort was just one more person that died before his time simply because of the war, yes he'd started it Draco, but he was once a regular person too".
"Harry, I know, I'm not saying you were wrong, I just care about you, I…" Draco's eyes filled with tears and he stepped forward to embrace Harry.
"Don't touch me, I'm mad at you". But as usual Draco didn't bother listening and he pulled Harry into his arms and held him.
"I know, but please Harry, you can't die with the dead". Harry's eyes clouded over at the sentence and the final collection of memories from the night of the attack crashed into his brain, images that hurt so much they seemed to sear his eyes.
They were at the door to the Great Hall, Draco was desperately tugging at Harry's arm, trying to get him from the room. Harry was frozen to the cold marble looking at his friend who was struggling to pull Hermione up off the floor.
"Come on Harry. We have to get out of here. The rest of the roof could fall at any moment".
"We can't, we have to help Ron and Hermione".
"Harry, its too late to help..." Draco's words were drowned out as the roof gave way with a thunderous explosion before gigantic slabs of it began to fall to towards the crowd on the ground below. Everything came to a near standstill as it appeared to Harry that time had slowed and he was watching the events unfold as though on a movie screen. He moved in the direction of Ron and Hermione but Draco held him back and he turned violently on the blonde, ready to fight him off if he had to. But the look in Draco's eyes was something Harry had never really experienced before, it was fear, Harry had seen Draco scared many times before but this fear was something else, it was pure and absolute horror, not at what was happening around them, it was fear that he was going to lose Harry. The Griffindor looked out at his two first friends and his eyes locked with Ron's. He saw a pleading look come over Ron's face and the red head twitched in a tiny nod towards Hermione. Harry looked back at Draco for a second time and the fear was still there, he had to make a choice, and he had to do it quickly. Shocked disbelief replaced the emotion in Ron's eyes as Harry felt Draco tighten the grip he had on the brunette.
The world seemed to realise that it had slowed down, like someone who had become lost in thought, and time burst back to its regular speed and the huge slabs of roof crashed into the floor just as Draco and Harry tumbled out into the entrance hall of the school. A cloud of dust burst from the Great Hall and covered all those who were in the entrance in a thick grey coating of fine powder.
The rumbling sounds of the collapse was still echoing through the school when Harry stumbled back into the Great Hall, now drastically changed. He climbed over unimaginably big boulders to the spot where he had last seen Hermione and Ron. They were gone, hidden beneath the dust and debris. He cast levitation charms until he could hardly hear himself think anymore but the pile beneath him just didn't seem to grow smaller. Draco was at his side suddenly and they began the effort anew and soon the rocks were becoming less and Harry could see a flash of pale flesh beneath the dust. They focussed their charms on that spot and soon Ron had reappeared from the rubble. The red head was covered in grey dust made thick by streams of blood that was pouring from his body. A witch with medical training the appeared and she and Draco levitated the unconscious Ron from the debris as Harry continued searching. Hermione was just beneath Ron and Harry cried out for more help but even as he did so he realised that it would be futile to get someone because Hermione was gone. Her face was almost unrecognisable, a deep gash ran down her forehead, over a now empty eye socket and down her cheek. Her other eye stared lifelessly up at the empty sky. Her right hand was clutched protectively around her belly, trying to protect her child until the last moment.
After the attack Harry had never spoken to Ron again, not at the Hospital, nor at the funeral His red headed friend had simply vanished into the background.
"I'm sorry she died Harry, I know what she meant to you but you have to promise me that you are never going to go back there to talk to her".
"I can't Draco, I… I need her". Draco pulled Harry even closer to him, wrapping his arms tightly around the brunette.
"No Harry, you only need us, you only need those of us who can still love you back".
"I… I…"
"Promise me Harry, please".
"I promise".
***
"You have to go see him Harry".
"I can't Seamus, not after all this time".
"Yes, even after all this time. God, you have been talking to Hermione's gravestone Harry, you need to see Ron and make peace".
"I can't Seamus, I don't even know if he will want to see me".
"Just try". They were sitting in the living room, discussing what had happened that morning. Draco had disappeared into the bathroom after the fight and had secluded himself in a warm bath, with the invitation for Harry to join. And joining was something Harry had wanted to do so much, since the air between them was mostly clear now he knew all the other parts of the relationship would be back to normal as well.
"You only have four days left Harry, you can't leave without seeing your best friend".
"No, okay. Just drop it please". Harry said a little too forcefully and Seamus turned his face away, not willing to continue the conversation, which suited Harry and he excused himself from the living room to join Draco.
"What was that about?" Draco asked as Harry stepped into the bathroom. The blonde was reclined in the bath, a mountain of bubbles surrounding him.
"He wants me to go see Ron". Harry grumbled and began to take off his clothes.
"Don't you think that might be a good idea?"
"No, I don't, I'm not going to see him. I can't". Draco nodded and spread his legs as Harry climbed into the bathtub with him. As the warm water settled over him he leaned back and felt Draco's body beneath his and he surrendered to the welcoming embrace. He tilted his head back and kissed the blonde lightly as Draco's pale hands came around his body and ran over his tired body, brushing against Harry's tight nipples.
"I think its time…" Harry whispered minutes later as he pulled Draco around himself in the tub, getting the blonde to settle on his lap. Almost immediately he felt Draco's cock harden between them and he became excited himself.
"Oh yes". Draco moaned as he lowered his head to kiss the brunette. As they kissed Draco lifted himself slightly and after reaching down to positions Harry's cock just right he lowered himself and impaled himself on Harry with a hard crash that made the water in the tub splash over the rim. The slippery, foamy water made it difficult to hold on to one another as Draco began to thrust his hips into Harry's body, Harry grabbed at the slippery marble sides and gasped. He let go one hand and they almost tumbled over but he righted them carefully and took Draco's wet cock in his hand, stroking it in the opposite rhythm of Draco's thrusts, knowing how it drove the blonde wild. Draco's eyes clouded again and he clutched at Harry's neck. He shuddered hard against Harry as he came, Draco's white seed floated around Harry and he tried to reach for it, letting go of his grip on the tub and they slipped. Harry felt his head submerge but he was too close to really notice. Draco thrust against him, riding on Harry's cock as he splashed water all over the room. He was still digging his nails into Harry's body. Harry in turn felt his chest begin to burn and he became aware that he was under water, that he couldn't breathe, that he was going to drown. He bit down on his lips, trying to keep his mouth from opening and taking that vital but final breath. Draco's muscled tensed around him and he felt his orgasm build a the base of his cock and a second later it rushed up his shaft and he exploded into his lover. The orgasm made his head swim under the water and he was sure he lost consciousness for a moment before shot upright.
"Fuck, that was amazing". Draco whispered as he pulled the gasping Harry into his arms. Harry took one deep breath after another and realised that Draco was right, he had never had and orgasm quite like that before. He's heard of aqua eroticism before but had never had the guts to actually try it but it seemed that the rumours were true, cutting off oxygen to the brain did make the orgasm better.
***
Ginny returned just before dinner with stories of her family and how much the Burrow had changed since they had last seen it, though it seemed to Harry that she was forcing some or maybe even most of the happiness she showed. She was overjoyed, however, to see that the men had sorted out their problems while she was gone. She'd also brought some of Molly Weasley's famous pumpkin pie and the group shared slices as they sat around the living room.
"How is Ron doing?" Harry asked and his two male friends stared at him in disbelief.
"He's doing better, its still pretty hard for him to get used to his new situation but I think he might be ready to accept it now".
"Did he mention anything about the attack while you were there?"
"No, he hardly ever speaks about it. Mum says he is still not coping well with Hermione's death". They all lowered their heads at the mention of Hermione. Harry's heart ached most of all, not only had he been forced to say goodbye to her when she'd died he had to give her up for a second time that day.
"I want to go see him after dinner, do you think it would be okay". Ginny frowned at Harry's request, she knew that he and her brother had barely spoken in a long time but she nodded.
Half an hour later Harry was standing at the floo again, staring into the fire place and wishing he'd never made the choice to go see his old friend after all. But Draco and Seamus were right, he'd chosen his dead friend over the living one and it was time for him to make amends with Ron. Draco came into the room and touched Harry's shoulder.
"I'm worried about how he will react when he sees me".
"He's still your friend Harry, no matter what happened".
"I know, but its been so long, in two days its going to be one year after the attack". They were all dreading the anniversary, but Harry most of all since he would spend the last day before slipping into the expected coma with people he hadn't seen in a year, people who were all going to be weeping over everything they had lost. He had suggested that they skip the whole ceremony that was planned at the school's graveyard but his friends would hear nothing of it and Harry had reluctantly agreed to accompany them..
"Just go Harry, you will feel better when you do it. Would you like me to come with you?" Draco placed a gentle kiss on the exposed part of Harry's neck, it made the brunette shudder and Draco couldn't help but smile.
"No, this is something that I have to do by myself".
"Okay". Draco whispered into his hair and stepped away to allow Harry into the fire place, he watched as the Gryffindor disappeared in the green flames.
Harry stepped out into the Weasley living room and looked around in awe. The once crowded room was almost bare, only one chair sat to the left of the door along with a small table in the centre of the room. Molly's radio was beside her chair as it had been for years. Harry slowly made his way towards the kitchen and as he opened the door he saw that the kitchen had become Spartan as well, most of the pots and pans that used to hang or stand on every surface of the room were gone, probably shrunk and put away. He lowered himself into one of the chairs around the once huge kitchen table where he'd had so many dinners as a child. His eye caught the strange enchanted clock above the door and took in the pictures. The clock showed that Ginny was "with a friend", Molly and Ron were both "Home". George and Oliver's pictures were settled at; "Sydney Apartment". Percy's picture was at; "Hallow Cemetery", while Fred, Hermoine, Mr Weasley, Bill and Fleur all settled at "Hero's Lake Cemetery". Harry sighed as he again remembered the many times he'd been at the cemetery by the lake at Hogwarts. So many of his friends were buried there.
The door opposite him opened and he looked up into a face he hardly recognised. Molly Weasley had aged a hundred years since the last time Harry had seen her. She was nearly half the weight she had been before and her once glorious red hair was hanging limply around her face, its colour drained to a dull grey, almost white in some places. Her face was so lined that she almost resembled Headmistress McGonagall even though Molly was sixty years younger. When she smiled however, Harry recognised something of the woman he had once known. She shuffled forward as he stood and they met halfway between the distance and embraced.
"Harry my boy, so good to see you". Her voice seemed to creak like an old door as she spoke. Her frail arms held him tightly for a second before she offered him a seat and a cup of tea. Harry had to restrain himself from jumping up and helping her fix the tea, her movements were slow and seemed painful. Her hands shook as she took out cups and they clanged against the counter before she charmed the kitchen to fix the tea itself. She settled herself into one of the chairs near him and cast a tire smile in his direction.
"How are you doing Harry?" She asked.
"Good Molly, and you?".
"We're doing okay thank you, well mostly". She sighed and Harry realised why she looked so old, Harry had seen it happen may times while he grew up, every time Ron didn't get his way he'd become a monster and he knew it was true, Ron was torturing Molly into the ground, not with any curse, but simply by his utter selfishness.
"I need to see Ron, it's important". Molly seemed to deflate even further, as though Harry's request was that hardest thing in the world for her to arrange.
"I don't think that is such a good idea Harry, he is still so angry about everything that happened".
"I suspected as much Molly, but I must see him, I might be able to help him". The tea arrived and they drank slowly, talking around the subject of Ron for several minutes but when the tea was finished there was no other distraction and Molly painfully pulled herself to her feet.
"Come on".
They made their way to the back of the house, where the twins' room had once been. Molly moved slowly, her steps barely longer than her feet as she shuffled her pained body towards her son's room. She knocked once and when they got no response Harry leaned forward and rapped at the door loudly.
"Fuck mother, I told you I didn't want to be bothered!" Ron yelled from inside and Molly seemed to shrink beside Harry. The brunette shook his head and opened the door. Stepping inside the room was like stepping into some other world. The room was clean, like the rest of the house, a wheel chair stood in one corner opposite the bed on which Ron lay. The windows were draped with thick curtains that barely let in any light and it left the room dingy. Ron was in a specially designed bed in the centre of the room, he seemed so thin beneath the sheets that covered him that Harry momentarily remembered the boy he'd met that first day on the trail. So small and thin that he was almost nothing but bones covered in a paper thick layer of skin. What seemed like hundreds of tubes were protruding from his body and were connected to tanks that stood around the room like guards watching over the patient between them. Molly remained outside the door, hidden from her son's view.
"Hello Ron". Harry whispered as he carefully made his way towards the bed, afraid that he might run into something, he heard Molly follow cautiously behind him. Ron took a second to recognise Harry but when he did Harry was somewhat surprised to see his friend's face crease into an angry expression.
"Fuck off, I don't want you near me". The red head tried to turn himself away from Harry but the damage to his body prevented the movement.
"Ron, that is unnecessary". His mother started but Ron cast her an angry look that sent her scurrying out of the room. Harry stepped up to the bed and settled himself at the foot of it, feeling the old mattress give way beneath his weight..
"I told you to get the fuck out of here, I don't want you here".
"Ron, please, I came to talk to you".
"I don't want to talk to you Harry".
"I want to help you Ron".
"Bullshit, where were you when I needed your help Harry". The anger in Ron's voice seemed to be contagious and Harry felt the infection of anger spread.
"You weren't the only one who suffered after the war Ron".
"No, I just suffered more than the rest of you. And that's your fault!"
"What, how is it my fault?"
"You weren't there Harry, when I needed you most you left me, you let all this happen".
"I told you Ron, after the attack I was shattered, you were there too, you know what happened and you know how much we lost". Harry reached out to touch Ron's hand but his old friend snatched his hand away as though Harry were diseased.
"We didn't loose anything Harry, I… I was the one who lost everything… you were supposed to be my friend no matter what but you were gone when… when you should have been there". Harry finally realised what Ron's anger was all about.
"I tried to help you guys when the roof came down Ron, you were too far away for me to do much".
"Bullshit Harry, you chose your fucking boyfriend over your friends. The last thing I saw before that rock came down on us was you running from the room with him. With that fucking Malfoy bastard for Merlin's sake".
"Don't you dare blame Draco for this, he had nothing to do with the attack and you know it".
"Piss off Harry, you were playing around with that little fucking Death Eater and I hear you got bonded with him. They killed Hermione and you go and bond with him. You are nothing to me anymore!" Ron reached for his wand but Harry was quicker and he disarmed Ron with a mere flick of his wand. As he watched Ron's wand fly through the air he began to recognise Ron's words and a sickening realisation dawned on him.
"You sent Percy to kill Draco didn't you?" Ron didn't even consider his answer or attempt to lie.
"Yes I did". It was Harry's turn to deflate emotionally, but deep down a tiny fuse was lit on a bomb of anger so strong that Harry nearly trembled as he felt it.
"Why?"
"Because of what he did Harry, you have to be blind or stupid to think that he didn't have anything to do with it". Harry's anger finally burst from the dam he'd built around it and he stormed the disabled Ron, thrusting his wand into the other man's face while grabbing his hair with his other hand.
"Don't fucking accuse Draco you little shit. He worked just as hard to repair everything, he had nothing to do with all that happened, I told Percy too but he wouldn't listen and now he's dead".
"So what, are you going to kill me too". Harry felt his mouth go dry, Ron actually though Harry would kill him. He was about to answer the red head but he heard a choked sound from the door. He turned to look at it and found Molly on her knees in the doorway, she was whispering something, her eyes closed and her lips moving as though she were silently praying. Harry called to her but she seemed to have zoned out. Harry let go of his former friend and made his way to her.
"Molly, are you okay?" He asked but she didn't seem to hear him, she started rocking back and forth. Harry knelt down next to her to listen to her words. She was repeating one sentence over and over and it chilled Harry to the core. He stood and stared angrily at Ron.
"I have the Creep, I'm going to be dead in four days". Ron took in this information for a moment.
"You fucking deserve it you prick, karma is a bitch isn't it". Harry felt his anger boil up again but he took a deep breath and smiled a forced smile at Ron.
"I'm going to arrange for you and your mother to be moved to St Mungo's tomorrow. You can have better care there. I will make sure you are cared for even after I'm dead". Ron's brow furrowed and he growled as Harry made his way back to Molly.
"I don't want your fucking charity you cock sucker, I can cope fine by myself". Harry knelt down and helped to lift the old woman to her feet.
"I'm not doing it for you Ron, I'm doing it for your mother".
"Don't try and be the hero again Harry, we don't need you to save us anymore but then you never were much of a hero, were you? You were just lucky to have others who would sacrifice themselves for you".
"You may be right Ron, but I will not allow you to abuse your mother any further". Ron's face turned red again and Harry could see the desire to hurt Harry burn in his eyes.
"You're the one who is blind Ron, you are so selfish that you don't even notice how much you hurt her, how hard you make life for her, you are so self centred that your own mother wishes terrible things for you".
"What terrible things?" Ron asked defiantly and Harry cast a charm on Molly to make her voice louder. Tears sprang to Ron's eyes and he looked at Harry and seeing that his former friend had performed no trick on him the red head fell back on the bed.
"Goodbye Ron". Harry whispered as he led Molly from the room.
In the kitchen he made the fire call to the hospital and arranged the care for the inhabitants. Doctors from both the psych ward and the hospice wing arrived several minutes later to take them away. Harry touched Molly's shoulder and tried to speak to her but the old woman didn't see him, she simply kept rocking back and forth, begging Harry to do something to his friend that he could never do.
"Please kill him, Please kill him, please kill him". He sighed as he listened to her words again, her deep desire to have her youngest son murdered. The doctors were casting charms on her when he left.
Harry stepped out of the fire place in his living room to find the apartment mostly dark and silent. He looked at the clock and saw that it was just past midnight, everyone would be asleep. He made his way to the hall but was stopped by a tired voice that came from the couch.
"Now you know what's been going on there". He turned and saw Ginny uncurl herself from the couch like some human sized cat and made a space for him to sit. He took the spot without a word and turned to face her.
"Why didn't you say anything?"
"My mother made me swear never to tell you or even Seamus".
"Why did you invite us over there then?"
"Because I knew you wouldn't really want to go since you were all in such foul moods but I guess I still hoped that one of you would say yes and then you'd know what's been going on. Merlin, he treats her so badly but there is nothing I can do. The last time I fought with him I ended up in St. Mungo's for two days". Harry reached out and took her hand in his.
"I'm so afraid his going to hurt mum one of these days, he is so angry all the time".
"He isn't going to hurt your mother Ginny, I made sure of that".
"What do you mean Harry?" Her voice took on the distinct panicky tone Harry had first heard in the hospital the night Draco was attacked.
"While I was there, something happened". He proceeded to explain to her all that had happened in the house, leaving out the detail that her own brother had sent her one of her other brothers to kill Draco and didn't even care is she died in the process. She took it in carefully, becoming more and more withdrawn as he went on. Tears finally streamed down her face as he explained her mother's state of mind but she soon brightened up when he told her of his plan to care for the two Weasley's. She tried to protest but it was futile since Harry had made up his mind. He almost told her about the disease but reeled in his tongue before it could let the words slip out.
After sitting together for long minutes Ginny finally stood up and bade him goodnight, seemingly relieved that the situations had been resolved. She disappeared from sight but returned a few seconds later with a letter in her hand.
"Oh yeah, Harry. This came for you just after dinner". She handed him a sealed parchment. He kissed her forehead and she went off to bed. He looked down at the letter in his hand and saw it was from Clarissa; his medi Witch.
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