Disclaimer: I own neither the characters nor the two publishing houses mentioned below. This is the good-girl version. See Foxy Spocky for the dirty bits of this and the last chapter.
It was nearly six o'clock before Spock and Uhura Spock and Uhura headed down to the hotel dining room in search of a somewhat early dinner or a very late lunch. Not that either of them complaining, but nearly eight hours of chocolate-and-stimulant-infused… fun burned a lot of calories.
It was exhausting work, too, but Uhura was too hungry to feel tired and Spock was… well, Spock.
Uhura was feeling giddy and excitable. Spock, at last coming down off Chekov's "gift" presented a considerably calmer demeanor to the world.
She couldn't take two steps with wanting to skip, dance, twirl, something!
Spock silently calculated the amount of time they would lose in reaching their destination if she engaged in the celebratory footwork in which she do patently desired to engage.
Every few seconds, she glanced over and him and struggled to smother her you-know-why-I'm-so-happy grin.
Spock's inner Vulcan told him he should be appalled at such a blatant (to him, anyway) display of triumph. His inner guy told his inner Vulcan to shut up because he'd just etched a semi-permanent smile on his woman's face and she'd signed up for a lifetime of more. Perhaps his system was not entirely clear of the gift, after all.
He glanced around the empty corridor and came to his second significant decision of the day.
"If you wish to leap about or spin around or dance, even," he told her, still looking ahead, "now would be the most opportune time. As long as you do so while continuing to move forward in the direction we are currently traveling, I calculate that we will only lose ten point three seconds of travel time."
With a nearly inaudible shriek, Uhura jumped up, spun around, shuffled her feet a few times, and then turned cartwheels the rest of the way down the corridor. She arrived at the lifts exactly four point two seconds ahead of Spock.
"My mistake, lieutenant," he said as he joined, his lips quirking up a teensy bit. "I did not take in account the possibility of gymnastic feats. It will not happen again."
He pushed the down button.
Neither was surprised to see find their crewmates huddled around a table, bickering over menus.
They briefly debated the merits of joining the others – Uhura knew she was still prone to the shit-eating grin and wasn't sure if she was up to the ribbing; Spock counseled that it might be better to get it over with before the men arrived in Africa just days after their own arrival and started the teasing there, in front of their guests, instead.
The decision was taken out of their hands when Scotty looked after stoutly declaring that roast beef with a side carrots, turnips and potatoes was a perfectly acceptable summer meal and looked up.
"I see our young lovers ha' decided to climb down the stairway from heaven, then!" he called out cheerfully. Of course the others all turned to stare, some hiding their amusement better than others.
Uhura felt her face reddening, but acquiesced when Scotty stood and pulled out a chair for her. Spock was right. Best to get it over with.
"Thanks, Scotty," she said, flashing brilliant teeth his way as she sat. There, she thought, let them think the smiles are for Mr. Scot!
Nobody was fooled by her attempt at smile transference. She heard a few snickers seep out from behind the menus that suddenly obscured her friends' faces once they'd greeted her and Spock.
"Ms. Uhura," began Chekov, "did you enjoy the gifts I had ma—?" He choked off his words when, clearly (Uhura suspected McCoy), someone kicked him under the table.
She chose to pretend she hadn't heard his unfinished question.
"What's good here, guys?" she asked, scanning the faces ringing the table. "I'm famished. Haven't eaten since the Rand and the others took me to dinner last night. We went to the oddest place— . """
"Och, lad!" Scotty interrupted, glaring at Spock. "Ye worked the girl long and hard, and
then ye didnae even feed her?"
The titters behind the menus turned to chuckles as Spock took his seat and looked Scotty in the eye.
"I believe, Mr. Scott," he said calmly, "that I was the one who carried the larger workload today. I am also very hungry."
Guffaws spilled out all around as menus landed on the table. Spock snagged one and began studiously studying its contents. No, he most certainly had not eliminated the last of the stimulants from his system.
Uhura half wanted an anomaly to form under her seat, and figured Spock was feeling even worse. Instead of turning disappearing into the space-time continuum, however, she opted to embrace her sense of humor.
She winked at Scotty, and leaned over to kiss him on the cheek.
"What's that for?" he asked, puffing himself up and grinning.
"For telling Spock about bath oils and scented candles," she told him, her voice sugary sweet. "I had no idea you were so practiced in the arts of romance."
Scotty waved her gratitude away with mock modesty.
"Hush now, lass I cannae be taking all the credit for that," he admitted, waving hand in front of his face and pretending to blush. "I learned all about it reading the Mills and Boon and the Harlequins. They really know how a girl wants to be treated, ye ken?"
It took Scotty a moment to realize that the silence at the table was due to four pairs of stunned eyes (Chekov had never heard of Mills & Boon or of Harlequin; Spock was simply grateful to be out of the limelight) were trained on him.
With a sinking feeling, Scotty realized that Uhura, Sulu, Kirk and McCoy all knew exactly what he was talking about.
"Hey now, it got awful boring on Delta Vega, what with just Keenser for company!"
Uhura picked up Scotty's fallen menu, opened it, and leaned closer to Spock.
"What do you feel like eating?" she asked him.
"The vegan lasagna has a sufficient balance of carbohydrates, protein and vegetables to help restore that which I lost during the day's endeavors," he said.
No one bothered to laugh this time. They were all, no doubt, still in shock over Mr. Scott's revelation.
Uhura and Spock closed their menus and began looking around for a server.
"Usually, I really like these old-fashioned places with real kitchens and real wait staff, but I'm starving," she commented to no one in particular.
Which was a good thing, because no one was really paying attention to her.
"So, you mean, you actually bought them and read them and everything?" Kirk was asking Scotty. "You weren't a little, uh, embarrassed buying fem-books?"
"Nae, captain," Scotty assured him, already over his embarrassment. "Truth be told, I was readin' them long before they sent my arse to Delta Vega. Ye'd nae believe how much the women love it when they see that stuff in yer readin' files. Makes them think yer tryin' to understand them."
"Really," Kirk said, musingly. "And they don't get turned off because its, you know, girly?"
"Hell no!" Sulu jumped in. "They love that stuff. It's like, if you're man enough to be comfortable with your feminine side, they're all over that." The helmsman let out a self-satisfied chuckle. "I mean, I grow flowers, captain. Flowers! Has only helped my game."
Kirk rubbed his chin thoughtfully, his attention turned inward.
"Hmm," was all he said in response.
McCoy felt duty-bound to add his opinion to the pot.
"Now, don't you listen to those two dogs, Jim!" He shot a glare, first at Scotty, then at Sulu. He shook his head at Chekov, who'd pulled out a PADD and appeared to be taking notes. "You get into a enough messes just being yourself. No need to play the game these two have already perfected. It's best if every man has his own angle. Now, I like to start with a story about bourbon."
"Speaking of girls," Uhura said, trying to change the subject. "Where are my girls?"
"Meeting us for drinks later," McCoy answered before launching back into his methods. "Speaking of drinks, I've found that bourbon can be one of the best ways to identify of a certain type appealing lady. A woman who knows her bourbon is…"
Uhura tuned them out and continued to search for their waitress. She sighed gratefully when Spock spotted one and waved her over.
"K'diwa," she whispered in his ear as she watched the young woman approach their table, "did you really think it was a good idea taking relationship advice from these four?"
The eyebrow rose again.
"I didn't take advice from them, beloved," he told her.
The waitress arrived and everyone placed their orders. Kirk checked out her ass as she walked away.
Scotty and company went back to debating pick-up strategies. Chekov took more notes. Spock resumed his private conversation with Uhura.
"I simply accepted a nuptial gift from Ensign Chekov," he insisted. "Would you have had me refuse and hurt his feelings?"
She laughed aloud.
"I can't believe that's your excuse!"
His other eyebrow quirked up.
"Were you dissatisfied with the result?" he wanted to know.
Uhura gave his shoulder a hard nudge with her own.
"You're just saying that because you know I can't resist you when you're acting so confident," she said with a smile.
"Indeed, I did not know that," he countered. "I did not even begin to suspect such a thing might be possible before the events of this morning. I will, however, keep the information in mind."