Chapter 3

BPOV

"Are you sure you still want to do this, Bells?"

It was the fourth of July and Billy and Jacob were going to be here any moment for our annual bar-b-q and Charlie knew I was getting nervous because I was going to tell Jake about me accepting the Cullen Fellowship finally. Even though I had accepted the fellowship the very day I received the packet in the mail in May, I hadn't told Jake about it at all. I was too nervous to tell him that I was moving over halfway across the country, and would be there for at least the next three years. He was my best friend still, but it was going to be hard to tell him about this big decision. Charlie told me I should have told him sooner, but I was procrastinating and I figured since there was less than a month before I was going to leave it would be best to tell him in person today.

"I'm sure dad. I have to tell him face to face, he's my best friend. It would feel cowardly to just tell him in one of our letters." I looked down and kicked the stone my foot was standing on, and watched it bounce back off the front tire of my truck.

Charlie was starting the coals and getting it ready to grill some burgers and hot dogs. "That's not exactly what I meant. Are you sure you still want to do this fellowship thing? You don't know anyone in Chicago and it's just so far from Forks, and everyone here will be heartbroken when you leave."

It was the most he had spoken to me in the last few weeks, and I could tell he was speaking about himself when he said everyone would be heartbroken. He was upset. I knew I was the only thing that Charlie cared the most about in the world, and he kept that locked tight inside him. I was his little girl and this would be the farthest and longest I would have ever been away.

"I'm sure pops." Giving him a light hug at his side, to which he coughed and then patted my shoulder in response. "It's only for three years, which will go by so fast, and I will make it back for Thanksgiving, Christmas, and the campus spring breaks if I'm not working." I looked up at him giving a reassuring smile. It would be tough for the both of us.

"I really want to do this, and I just can't say no to opportunity such as this. This fellowship is one of the most select in the world, and I'll be working with some of the most experienced and talented experts in the neuropsychology field. I'll be able to do something I've always wanted. You know I love everyone here, but I really want to do this." He nodded and that closed the topic, at least for now.

Jake was coming up the drive way in his new car, a restored 1969 Chevy Camero with Billy in the passenger seat, waving over at Charlie and me. Jake parked the car and reached behind him to get the hot dog and hamburger buns he said he would bring today. Billy had a Tupperware container of what I was sure was Sue Clearwater's double chocolate brownies. Charlie smiled at the container and took them out of Billy's hand and replaced them with a freshly opened can of Rainier beer.

"Easy drive in there, kiddo?" Charlie asked Jake while silently offering him a beer as well.

"Pretty good, got some holiday traffic a little outside Seattle, but other than that, it was easy breezy. Thanks for the drink." He took a large gulp, probably downing half of the can. Jake nodded to the men to excuse himself from their conversation and walked over to me, slipping an arm around my shoulder to give me a soft hug.

"Hey Jake, it's great to see you." I inhaled to calm me down so I could get my shit together before I told him my news.

"Great to see you too, girl. I haven't had to rescue anyone from walking across a flat surface in months, now maybe I can today." He leaned back and laughed with a smart ass wink.

I shoved him away from me, "Jack-ass."

"Yeah, but you still put up with me. So I'm not gonna quit." He laughed and walked to sit down at the table I had set up this morning so we could eat outside today. The weather report said there would actually be sun for the fourth, and it was right for once.

"I wouldn't expect any less." I said as I slid next to him at the table and opened a bag of potato chips. "How are things? Sam still talking to you about managing the new shop he wants to open?" Grabbing a handful of chips and popping some in my mouth, waiting for his response.

"Yeah, it looks like he'll be open it in October and he told me that I just have to manage it because I was the only one in the shop he could ever think of trusting with it. Once it's set up and it's official, I'll take it. I mean it's a great opportunity and it will help me with saving up for my own shop and will get me out there with a good reputation in the business." His smile was beaming when he spoke. I knew you would never say no, plus he was the best guy there and fully deserved this position.

"You'll do great Jake. I'm so proud of you. Not many 24 year olds can say they manage an auto garage." I elbowed him and he pretended to be sorely injured. I just rolled my eyes.

"So how are things with you? Billy told me that you had been looking to go back for your Master's degree for some time. You get any bites, Miss Brain?" He sipped his can of beer.

I thought I would be able to gradually ease into this conversation, but Billy and his big mouth just had to make it more difficult for me.

"Yeah, sorry I didn't tell you about that before. I was really busy with all the applications and working with the counseling center at the hospital I forgot to tell you in my letters." I hoped he would be convinced.

"It's ok Bella. I forgive you… this time." He snickered.

I sighed. It was now or never… or maybe Billy can just tell him. No, no I said I would tell him in person. Man up and just tell your best friend you are moving across country for three years and would hardly be able to visit.

"Well, it's pretty interesting that you brought that up because I…I did get some bites. A lot of places must desperate for some money since I got a few acceptance letters." I was talking way too fast. And he just kept sitting there sipping his beer and staring at our fathers as they debated if the coals were ready.

Just breathe. You'll get through this. And Jake will understand.

"If fact…" deep breath, "I accepted a fellowship one of them offered."

He was silent for just a moment and then shifted in his seat to look at me. "I'm so proud of you, Hun." He reached over and took me in a big bear hug that left me speechless since he was cutting off my air. I tapped his back to let him know and he released me "Opps, sorry." He bit his lip and looked at me with apologetic eyes to which I nodded my forgiveness and he leaned back in his chair.

"So, which lucky school is going to need and increase their insurance policy to welcome you on campus?" He was in a teasing mood today and I punched him in the shoulder. "Is it the University in Washington? I hope somewhere close, I'd miss you something awful if you had to go anywhere too far." He reached into the open bag of chips and shoved a handful in his mouth.

Crap.

"Well, no. The fellowship I accepted is actually at the University of Chicago." I waited for his reaction, but he just looked off to the distance and continued to munch on chips. "In Illinois, you know. Where Ferris Bueller was filmed." He shook his head and laughed.

"Geeze Bella, do I look like a dumb shit? I know where Chicago is." He sighed. "That's really far. You know anyone out there? How long is this going to be for? How's Charlie taking this?" He was upset and I could tell.

"Well, Charlie is handling it in his own way. He's upset because it's not close to here, but I told him it's something I wanted to do for me, and I think he's starting to accept it." Jake shifted uncomfortably in his chair now, running a hand through his hair. "The packet I got on the fellowship said that it was good for three years, and I hope that I'll be able to make it through. There's so much involved with it and my responsibilities will have me pulling my hair at times, but it will be well worth it once I'm done."

"What do you do in this Fellowship thingy?" He strained to ask.

Where to start. When I had opened the thick packet of information about the Cullen Fellowship I was shocked at my obligations. "Well, the good thing is that all my financial responsibilities and housing will be taken care of with the position. I'm scheduled to arrive two weeks before the fall semester starts because the position has an arrangement with university where I can receive free housing in their upper division housing as a resident advisor. So all my living expenses and some food costs are taken care of, which is a relief. And my tuition is taken care of since I accepted."

"Wow, I just know that you will love getting those 4am knocks on the door about girls breaking up with their boyfriends and the cardboard cafeteria food." He teased.

"Shut it, you oaf. Do you want to know what I get to do, or are you just going to be a jerk. If you are, I'll just tell Charlie to burn your hot dogs right now." He made a motion that he was going to zip his lip and signaled that I should proceed.

"I wasn't exactly too thrilled about that, but if it helps with my finances, I won't argue. Besides that I have a ton of other responsibilities that will keep me occupied. I have three courses the first semester and on top of that I get to work in a lab with a research team exploring alpha and beta waves on participants undergoing a hypnosis experimental trial." I was talking animatedly with my hands and saw Jake was nodding his head, and not understanding a word I was saying, but at least he was being polite. "I also get to work as a teaching assistant for undergraduate courses with the man in charge of the research team. He's been assigned as my mentor for my Master's program too which is just nerve wracking but I feel so fortunate to have his guidance. You see, he's been in the field for so long and I've read up on all his work since I found out I'd be working with him. A lot of my professors from Seattle would talk about his studies in their courses, so I can't wait for his input with my own work." I let out a deep breath after I finished. I had wanted to tell Jake ever since that Wednesday I got the letter and now he finally knew.

"Sounds like you are finally getting what you've worked so hard for. Now, I am sad that my best friend is going to be so far away, but I'm very proud and happy for you Bells. They don't know how lucky they are that you chose them." He stood up and walked to the cooler and took out two beers, came back to the table and offered me the second one. "Cheers! Here's to you getting out there and doing something for you and here's to hoping that the hospital's there are fully equipped your weekly visits." He smiled and threw back a swing as I punched him again.

"Jack-ass!" I huffed and swallowed my beer as he wiggled his eyebrows at me.

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The sun was setting as the four of us finished the mass amount of burgers and hot dogs Charlie grilled up. I swear Jake was eating his seventh dog and he probably had two burgers before that. I was clueless as to how one person could each so much. After two dogs and half a burger I was in pain.

"How does everyone feel about watching the game for a bit before they attempt the fireworks?" Charlie was always in the mood to watch sports, as was Billy. Jake looked like he was about to pass out from food exhaustion so he would probably end up on the couch more asleep than intently watching the game.

"I'm down. Just let me clean up out here and I'll meet you men in a few." I started to pick up the paper plates scatted on the table. I was happy that there was hardly anything I would need to wash tonight.

Billy and Charlie quickly walked into the house and the TV was on as soon as I went to take Jake's plate. "Are you done?" I started to take his plate away from his spot when he softly took my wrist. I paused and looked at him. His eyed were sad as he stared back at me.

"Jacob, what's wrong? Do you need some Tums? If you are gonna throw up, you need to get away from me, or I'll throw up too." I always had a weak stomach.

Jacob just shook his head and continued to look at me. "Don't go." It was soft as a whisper.

"I'll be back in a little bit, I just need to throw the plates away and then get the grill utensils to wash." I tried to pry his hand off my wrist, but he just gripped tighter.

"No, don't go to Chicago. Please. I know it's a great opportunity, but don't go." He pleaded

I was taken aback, he was so happy for me over an hour ago, and now he was practically begging me to stay and give up a dream. "Jake, I already told them yes and I have my plane ticket, besides you know it's my dream. Why do you not want me to go?"

"You're my Bella. My best friend. I don't want to lose you." He released his grip and was distracted by his shoes and started to pick at them, not looking at me anymore.

"I'll come home for the holidays. You think I'm just gonna pack up and forget all of you here. I would never do that to Charlie or you and Billy. I'll even try and come back when the university is off for their spring break. I'll call, text and send letters to all of you goofs the entire time I'm there since I don't know anyone else." I sat down and rubbed his shoulder to show him I would never think of forgetting him.

"I don't want to hold you here, as much as I would like, but you need this for you. So, go to Chicago and I swear if I don't get a call or letter from you I will fly out there myself, track you down and try to force you back home." He pretended to be stern with me which just caused me to crack up and punch him for the third time that night.

"Well I'll abuse our friendship a bit more before I go in August and demand that you help me clean all this up," I pointed to the mess on the table. "And then I'll let you catch some shut eye before the fireworks." I threw a black trash bag in his hand and went back to picking it all up. Fifteen minutes later I was soaking the utensils in the sink, Billy and Charlie were fighting over which sports channel to watch now and Jake was snoring on the couch.

I was overcome with a lot of emotions realizing that in less than a month I will be leaving the three men in my living room, who were the only three people I cared and loved the most in the world. I was scared, happy, nervous, and excited all at the same time. It would be difficult to go, but they all wanted me to take this chance because they wanted me to follow my dreams.

There was something in the pit of my stomach that told me I was doing the right thing. I was supposed to go to Chicago. Though I would be busier and more stressed than ever, I was meant to go there, at this time in my life. I was excited about what Chicago would be like and laughed thinking back to the phone conversation I had with the chairman of the Fellowship in May.

I had been so excited when the letter arrived that an hour after I read through the information in the packet I dialed the number listed in the letter on the kitchen phone to call and accept the position. I didn't want to wait to tell Charlie before I did this.

Ring... Ring... Ring...

"Dr. Carlisle Cullen's office, this is Jeanne, how may I help you?" an elderly woman answered.

"Um, yes, hello. My name is Isabella Swan. I'm calling in regards to the letter I received about being offered the Cullen Neuropsychology Fellowship?" My response came out as a question.

"Oh yes, I was told to expect a call from you, but I didn't expect it this soon." She laughed light-heartedly. "Let me see is Dr. Cullen is available and I'll put you through." There was a quick pressing of buttons and then I heard soft on-hold music. It was a poorly done Berry Manilow piece where some person spoke over it about the excellence of the school and the prestigious awards and honors. My mind started to drift when Jeanne's voice returned and the music stopped.

"Ms. Swan?"

"I'm still here."

She laughed, "Good, Dr. Cullen will speak to you now, so I will transfer you over. Again, congratulations and please have a wonderful day."

I was about to thank her when a new voice answered. "This Dr. Cullen. Is this Ms. Isabella Swan?"

I was so nervous, my mouth was dry and I tried to clear my throat to talk. "Um, yes, hello, Dr. Cullen. It's very nice to speak to you. I was calling in regards to the Cullen Fellowship." Dr. Cullen was silent so I continued. "Well, I received the packet today and I want to thank you so much for offering me this opportunity and I would like to formally accept the position."

"Well, we are certainly looking forward to you joining our academic family here at the University of Chicago. I must say I am rather surprised to have you accepted so quickly since we just sent it off last Friday. Please don't misunderstand, we do feel honored you accepted." His voice was warm, and had a fatherly kindness to it. I was biting my lip to contain the joy that was building up in me.

"I am the one who is honored, Dr. Cullen. Again, sir, thank you." I would have gushed more, but felt it would be inappropriate and unprofessional.

We spoke a little while longer about the position. He answered some concerns I had. Mostly clarifying my living situation.

"I know it is not a favorable situation to stay in the on campus residence, but the University feels that it would be beneficial for the role you will play here. Maybe you could convince some of your residents to participate in the research study, which could be some fun." I snorted a little and heard him chuckle at his joke too.

He told me that I would indeed be working with the head of the Neuropsychology department, Dr. Edward Cullen, who was his youngest son, and told me about the state of the art equipment in the laboratory and the number of members on the team. I would TA for the developmental psychology courses in the undergraduate studies his son taught and that there could be opportunities for some of my work to be published and I may be able to travel and present at conferences during the year. I was biting my nails the entire time as he listed all the wonderful responsibilities I would have.

Before our call finished he asked me to call him if any more questions were to come up and to expect a letter from the university closer to August that would provide me with my official course schedule, my lab work hours, the address for my new campus residence and an invitation to the annual dinner he and his wife put together each fall for the Behavioral Sciences department. He said that it would be a good opportunity to introduce me to those who I would be seeing daily in the halls. Although I hated to meet a large number of people at one time, I told him I was excited to attend.

Before I hung up, I thanked him again for his time and told him how much I was looking forward to meet him and the rest of the team. He could probably feel the shit eating grin on my face as I spoke.

"It was a pleasure to speak with you today, Ms. Swan. I will go ahead and inform the staff of you acceptance and we will see you soon. You have a wonderful day now." And he softly hung up his phone.

I squealed so loud when I hung up the kitchen phone and was thankful the neighbors were out for the day or they would need to call in to my father about me disturbing the peace. I ran upstairs to the computer in my room so I could email the hospital and informed them that I would need to resign from the counseling department at the end of July.

"BELLA!" Charlie called to the kitchen. "Do we have any more of Sue's brownies?"

"Only about a dozen, so it won't last another hour." I yelled back. I dried my hands and picked up the Tupperware container, opening the lid and taking the last brownie I would get for the night and handed the container to Charlie as I entered the living room.

I plopped down on the sofa next to Jacob, where he let out a yelp because I woke him up. He softly pushed me away showing he didn't like that and rubbed his eyes and stretched out his arms with a low yawn.

"Is it almost time for the fireworks?" I asked.

"Um, just about. We got ten minutes." Billy replied after looking at his wristwatch.

"Great, I'll go get us some jackets and I'll meet you boys outside in a bit."

It was the first time in several years Forks would have fireworks for the fourth of July, all thanks to the beautiful weather today. I was happy to have the chance to see this rare event before I would leave my home in a few short weeks.