Scars of where the war was waged on words that we heard as a joke,
how did it drown our love?
Oh lord, when it rains it's sure to pour
but when I look in your eyes I fear I won't see surprise
that I'm not doubling back
She had been having fun with Dean, but the sudden reality had crashed. He was married. He had a wife. But still. It had been fun.
Then he came through the door.
He'd declared his love last winter, leaving in his beat up car before the words had even registered.
He left her. Like always.
What the hell does he want?
She makes Dean leave, and then turns her attention to him.
He looks good.
No. He hurt her.
He will only ever hurt her.
Go with him?
She wants to laugh. Its crazy.
But it could work. She knows she loved him.
Loves him?
Single for a year trying to get over him.
"No." She knows it wouldn't work.
She just wishes it could.
But she learnt at age six wishes don't come true. No matter how badly you want them to.
"Don't say "no" just to make me stop talking or make me go away. Only say "no" if you really don't want to be with me."
Yes, her minds screams. "No!" Her mouth does.
She sees the heartbreak in his eyes as he turns and leaves.
She sits and takes a deep breath, holding it for a minute before exhaling.
She can't go after him.
She wants to. But she can't.
She knows it would end badly.
And she knows her heart couldn't survive losing him again.
That would kill her.
They would kill each other.
She was right to say no.
She hopes.
No, I'm not doubling back now