Colonel George Mustard,
I hope you remember me from the bar in Daytona Beach. The bar was called if I remember correctly The Palm Tree. It was a quaint little bar I think. I really enjoyed their Tom Collins. That is my favorite drink you know. I know you had a good time my dear friend because you felt loose enough to tell that dreadful little story. The story if I remember correctly was that you had stolen parts from military planes and sold them on the black market. Very disturbing story. Very disturbing indeed. A certain plane was flown by my dearest brother, Jonas. He died in Pearl Harbor after the flight tower was unable to communicate the appending attack to him. He died leaving behind his two young daughters. My poor nieces. Our family was devastated. I still mourn the loss of my brother. A dirty business blackmail is. It makes one feel lowly and dirty. I feel, however, my friend that I must blackmail you in order to get retribution for my family. I will not go to the police with this if you agree to pay a lump sum for my trouble. I will take $1400 a month and not a penny less. If you do not agree to these terms then I will go to the police. I eagerly await your answer.
Sincerely,
Mr. Adrian Body