Chapter 22: Ember Island

Zuko had the brilliant idea of hiding out on an island paradise. Honestly, why had it taken them so long to come up with that idea?

Jin quickly discovered that she loved the beach. She loved sand. She loved how it slipped between her fingers and stuck to her feet. She loved how her footprints stayed for a while before the waves washed them away. She loved to see who could make the largest sand castle: her or Sokka. Sometimes they branched out into who could make the best sand castle, but neither of them was particularly skilled and the judgment was always subjective anyway.

She loved the water. She loved the salty taste in her mouth, and the way the waves pushed her over. Katara and Suki were attempting to teach her to swim. It wasn't going very well, but she was having a fantastic time anyway. Lee could lift her clear out of the water when she began to splutter and throw her over his shoulder to march her back to shore. She would fall on the beach laughing and her wet limbs would become coated in a fine layer of gray sand.

She loved the sun. It felt wonderful against her face and she would lie out in the sun for hours until Katara would yell at her about sun burn and sun sickness and the sun damaging her hair.

She liked sleeping in a bed again – a bed that had a mattress instead of a bed made of a slab of rock with a blanket and a pillow. And it was Lee's childhood bed. She had to admit that that was fun.

Lee would wake early and train Aang until lunch while the rest of the group snooped around his house. She and Katara found the family portraits and personal letters. She and Suki found the clothes and large collection of Fire Nation poetry. She and Sokka found the armor, a tsungi horn, a kuai ball, and a colony of moth-bats.

Toph was the undefeated champion of kuai ball. Or at least she was until Zuko explained the real rules. At that point Zuko became the champion of kuai ball and Toph shot him into the ocean with a well timed earth launch. As she spent her mornings sleeping late and practicing her sand bending, she trained Aang after a hardy lunch from the market.

At sundown Sokka would build a campfire on the beach. The group would survey his struggles without providing assistance as they watched Aang and Katara dance across the waves.

Under the stars, with the mingled sounds of waves and laughter, it was possible to forget about the war.

Jin rubbed a pink scar on Lee's shoulder. "What's this one from?"

"That's from Smellerbee. You knew that."

"Wow. She got you bad."

"Humpf."

"What about this one?" She poked a burn on his ribs.

"That's from when my ship exploded."

"Exploded?"

"Yeah. Some pirates set up a bunch of blasting jelly to get back at me."

"Pirates?" she asked, raising a skeptical eyebrow.

"Yeah."

"You expect me to believe that?"

"It's true. You can ask Aang."

"Aang was there?"

"Well, no."

"Hmm."

"Fine. Think what you want."

"Aww, don't be mad" she cooed, tracing his jaw line.

"What about you?"

"What about me?"

"How'd you get this one?" he grabbed her knee, making her squeal, and rubbed a scar on her calf.

She laughed. "My brother had this great idea that we should catch a pig-sheep. I managed to get hold of it, but then it got spooked and ran off. It dragged me to the other side of the village."

"Really?"

"Yeah. It probably wouldn't have been as bad if I had just let go."

"Wait. It was running off and dragging you, and you hung on to it?"

"Yeah. I got it when my brother thought that I couldn't. I wasn't going to let go of that pig-sheep for anything."

"You're nuts."

"Yep."

"And this one?" He touched a mark on her forearm.

"Falling down stairs."

"It's a burn."

"And?"

It was his turn to be skeptical. "How do you burn yourself falling down stairs?"

"I'm talented."

"No, really."

She shrugged. "I fell onto a hot emu-horse shoe. See? You can kinda see the shape."

"But what was a hot emu-horse shoe doing at the bottom of the stairs?"

She shrugged again. "Let's go to the beach. I bet it's nice this late."

"You're changing the subject."

"And you're very clever." She kissed his cheek and slipped out of bed.

Sokka decided that they should go see a play. Jin would later refer to this as "Sokka's worst idea ever." And that was saying something.

First: they of course got it wrong, saying Zuko was head of the resistance. That was irritating, but she was used to it by now and already knew that that's what people thought. She let that one slide, cursing Hiro and Long Feng for the thousandth time.

Second: her doppelganger wore the most atrocious dress ever. They were obviously trying to make some point about how she was poor. Fine. They just didn't know how amazingly stylish she was.

Sometimes.

Ok. So she did look disheveled every now and then. That's ok. Everyone does.

Third: what was with Fake Zuko hitting on Fake Katara? Where the hell did that come from? Yeah, they were friends and, yeah, they were different genders and, yeah, they spent a lot of time alone together and, yeah, they were both hot and would probably complement each other very nicely…

She decided to end that train of thought before she got upset.

Finally there was "The Scene".

Fake Zuko's voice was carrying and his words were over pronounced. "Even though you're an Earth Kingdom peasant, Jin, I feel like I love you. You must have cast some spell on me."

"Haha!" Fake Jin crowed. "How right you are. And now that I'm pregnant with your child, you will have to marry me and I will become Fire Lady!"

The stage Zuko wailed, pressing the back of his hand to his eyes. "Our child, the future ruler of the Fire Nation, may be an earth bender."

Fake Jin cackled and rubbed her stomach. "He is! I can feel him kick!"

The crowd erupted in boos.

Jin could feel all the eyes of her friends on her back. Lee was gaping at the stage with his mouth hanging open and a pronounced flush etched across his face.

"Wait. You're not… Oh my God!"

"Shh, Sokka."

It was stifling. She was suffocating. The room was spinning. She needed air. She needed to throw up.

Lee found her on the beach, staring out at the water in the direction of Ba Sing Se. Her arms were wrapped tightly around herself as if she were cold, which she surely wasn't. The waves had caused her feet to sink into the sand up to the ankle. Even as he stood in front of her and pulled her into a tight embrace, she refused to meet his eyes.

"It's just a play" he murmured.

"It still hurts."

"Just ignore it. They don't have any idea what they're talking about." It was hard for him to tell her that, while he didn't believe it himself. She had left before the end when he had seen himself killed. Maybe if he kept reassuring her, the words would ring more true and he could reassure himself.

"They hated me, Lee."

"They hated me too."

"The audience in there was representative of your people. And they all think I'm a knocked-up, manipulative, ugly bitch with some kind of Earth Kingdom witchcraft."

"You're not ugly."

"And the other things?"

"Well, I hope you're not knocked up."

She sniffed. "I'm most certainly not."

He smiled against her hair. "But, you did set the Dai Li against the fire benders and you came into the tea shop every day to bother the hell out of me until I fell for you. That counts as manipulative. You are a bitch sometimes, but that's alright. And you do have some kind of Earth Kingdom witchcraft." He bent and kissed her neck.

"If your people hate you how are you going to be Fire Lord? If they hate me, then how can I be around you?"

"You think I care what they think?"

"You should. You need the people behind you. You need their support and you need their approval. If I'm near you, you won't have that."

"We'll win them over. We'll do it together."

"No, Lee. Don't you see?" She squeezed her eyes shut. "What if … what if your heir isn't a fire bender?" She lowered her head, ashamed to even be talking about such things. She didn't want to marry him and she didn't want to have his children. At least she thought she didn't. Not yet anyway. But it was the next step, and she really ought to think about it, even if it was just to convince herself of what a bad idea it would be.

He lifted her chin so she finally met his eyes. "Then I will still love it. And I will always love you."

"Damn it, Lee." She stepped back from him, pulling her feet out of the sand and shouting, "Don't you see that that's not enough? It doesn't matter what we want. Your country needs you!"

He shouted back, "Screw my country!"

"Don't ever say that again!" she screamed and slapped him so hard that his face was jerked to the side.

They stared at each other as the waves crashed around them. She covered her mouth with her hand in shock. Her palm was still warm from the impact against his cheek. His eyes were wide and bright and full of pain.

She had hit him. Oh, spirits help her. She was just like her father. Just like when she was playing tag by the forge and making too much noise. I'll give you something to shout about.

The scar on her arm seemed to burn.

Heaven forgive her.

She swallowed and in a strained voice said, "I'm going back to the house. I need to think… I don't want to see you for a while."

She left him on the beach, sinking into the sand.

Zuko came back a little after midnight, having spent several hours sitting by the ocean.

As he headed up the stairs to where Jin was, someone caught hold of his arm. He looked down to see Suki with a determined look in her eyes. "Leave her alone."

"I wasn't going to-"

"Yes you were. She just needs to sleep it off. You can talk to her tomorrow."

He glared at her and ripped his arm from her grasp. He continued up the stairs without looking back. Suki sighed and decided not to stop him.

Jin was asleep in his bed. He sat next to her and brushed his fingers against her cheek. Her eyes fluttered open and he smiled down at her.

"Hey."

"What do you want?"

"I have an idea and I want you to listen."

"I don't want to hear your crazy ideas." She rolled over to face away from him.

"I'm going to tell you anyway. Whether or not you listen is up to you."

"Humpf."

"I have two ideas and you can tell me which one you like best. First, when we win the war, I can abdicate the throne and give it over to my uncle or my next closest relative. I think I have a second cousin or something. Or I can just announce someone trustworthy as Fire Lord if my cousin turns out to be Mini Ozai. Then we can go back to Ba Sing Se and reclaim the tea shop or whatever else you want to do."

"That's stupid. You're working so hard to reclaim the Fire Nation and then you're just going to hand it over to someone you don't even know?"

"Fine. You might like my second plan better: I become Fire Lord and you become my concubine."

"What?" She sat up in bed and glared at him.

"It's a fairly common practice for Fire Lords to have concubines. It's also not unheard of for them to be from other nations. They have a very high standing in the court."

"You've got to be kidding me."

"No. And that way the people can get to know you and you can earn their love and respect by doing all the Fire Lady's duties amazingly well and maybe setting up some welfare programs: hospitals or parks or festivals or teaching kids to read. We can be together, you win over the people and do helpful things like you like doing, and - when they all love you - we get married."

"Concubine."

"Yes. Did you hear the rest of it?"

"No. I was stuck on Concubine."

"It's a good idea, Jin."

"It's insulting."

"I insult you all the time. You usually get over it."

She stared at him, trying to figure him out like some sort of puzzle. "How many other concubines will you have?"

"None."

"And what if I don't win over the people?"

"That's not possible."

"And what if you go and get married while I'm your concubine?"

"That's not going to happen."

"Don't princes get married for all sorts of political reasons? You'd miss out on that."

"I can cope."

She narrowed her eyes slightly.

He pushed her further, trying to sound as convincing as possible. "Just think of it as a very long engagement. Or as a Fire Lady trial run."

"What about the heir problem?"

"He'll probably be a fire bender."

"You're relying on 'probably'?"

"Yes."

"Idiot."

He looked into her face. She never used to frown this much. She used to be so carefree and collected. That was before the occupation. Before she got involved in everything. He couldn't help but think that this was somehow all his fault.

"Are you alright?"

She thought about lying. Yes, I'm great. Go to sleep. But he was so sincere.

"I hit you and you ask me to marry you again."

"Don't slap me anymore and I won't ask again."

"I'm serious."

He hung his head to avoid her eyes. "Yeah. I know."

They sat in silence for a time, before he pulled her close. "Are you going to be ok?"

"… I don't know."

He pressed her closer and rubbed soothing patterns on her back. "No matter what happens, we'll work through it."

Her thin frame, which had once inspired such confidence, shook in his arms.