Chapter 5
The next month was a frenzy of preparations as I made Hattie's dress. Hattie kept urging me to work more quickly on her dress, and I was forced to oblige. I pricked myself so many times that I came to get used to the pain. I came to become accustomed to the loneliness as I worked on the dress day and night, changing various parts of it over and over for Hattie.
On one sunny day, I sat on my bed, stitching floral designs into Hattie's dress. Father was due to come back home any time soon today, and he had ordered me to finish Hattie's dress before he had come back.
I thought of the miseries in my life. A feeling of anger ceasessly pulled at me, but I was too exhausted and too weak to cry out in anger.
The front door opened, and I heard Mandy and Olga rush out to meet Father.
I mindlessly continued on the stitching. After finshing a pink flower, I started on a yellow one, disregarding all that the Mistresses at Finishing School had taught me. Then, without being aware of it, I started to stitch in a green flower.
"I've never seen any green daisies," said someone by the door.
I looked up in surprise. Daniel was leaning against the doorframe, smiling arrogantly.
"Haven't seen you for a while, Eleanor," he said.
I deliberately turned away from him.
"What are you doing here?" I asked.
"Come on, I was just joking!" He said good-naturedly.
"What are you doing here?" I repeated.
"I came with your father," he said. I was unresponsive.
"Are you angry that i visited you when you were sick? Are you mad at me?" he aske.
I said nothing, trying to make it easier to ignore him.
He came to where I had been sitting and placed his hands on my shoulders.
"Turn around," he urged. I bit my lip, trying hard not to. Weakly, I turned around and faced him.
"What's wrong?"
I didn't answer the question.
"Why won't you accept me?" he pleaded. "Why are you making it so hard on me?'
Then, I caught a glance of Hattie's dress. Char's smiling face and thoughtful grin appeared in my mind. Being unable to control it, all my misteries poured out through my eyes, as tears flowed out.
"I can't," I said. "There's...someone else."
"Who is it?" Daniel asked.
I sighed.
"It's over. He...despises me now," I said. "Though I wish he didn't. But every moment with you reminds me of him."
I looked over at Daniel and saw him commiserating with my misery. We both said nothing.
"I'm sorry," I said. "You don't have to be affected by my personal problems."
"So is he why you won't marry?" he said harshly.
I put another stitch into the daisy.
"Yes," I mumbled. "He is the only person I would ever consider marrying."
"You don't need to shape your whole life around him," he said coldly. "He's not the only man in the world. There are plenty better than him."
"I will love only him," I whispered.
I could feel Daniel stiffen.
"What is it about him that makes you so hopeless? Is he a king? A prince?"
I didn't answer the irony of it.
"It doesn't matter," I said.
"I didn't know you were capable of such strong feelings, Eleanor," he said.
"Daniel, I've thought about it," I said, starting to stitch another flower. "We can't have a relationship."
Daniel said nothing.
"Please leave," I said weakly, stabbing my needle into the cloth. A tear streamed out of my eye. I mindlessly stuck the needle in and out of the cloth, stitching messily. After several minutes, I looked behind me, and he was gone.
--
Several hours after Daniel had left, Hattie came into my room, demanding the dress.
I finished stitching one more bow, and pushed it to her.
"I'm done," I said. "Don't ask me to put anything more on it." Indeed, the dress was already so filled with flowers and ribbons that the original cloth was hardly to be seen.
Hattie held it in both of her hands, shrieking and twirling.
"Char will definitely propose to me after he sees me in this dress," she said. Then, she stopped. She inspected the dress more closely.
"What's this, a green daisy?"
I looked at it. I had forgotten to take out the green daisy. However, I did not have to will to fix it.
"Hattie," I said, fibbing. "Green daisies are fashionable this year."
She pouted. "No they aren't."
"You obviously haven't been very informed about this year's fashion trends, then." I said. "Believe me, it's true." I felt slightly guilty for lying to her, but my fingers were so weak that I could barely move them, let alone fix Hattie's dress."
"Well, anyways," she said. "I still look beautiful." She tossed a measly bronze coin on my bed.
"What's this?" I asked.
"I'm feeling generous," she said. "So I decided to pay you for your work."
"Thanks," I said dully. A bronze coin wasn't even enough to buy a stalk of lettuce. I headed down the stairs towards the kitchen. I was famished.
Father, Daniel, Dame Olga, and Olive were already sitting at the dining table eating.
"Ella, come join us," Father beckoned, to the empty seat next to him. There was a plate with the remains of a meal. Hattie had probably sat there.
"I didn't call you earlier because I didn't want to distract you from your work,"he continued.
I felt like crying out at the unfairness of everything. Then, my eye feel into contact with Daniel's. Our eyes locked for a moment. Then, he looked away. Holding my head up high, I went into the kitchen.
In the kitchen, Mandy was busy with cleaning up pots and pans.
"Here, sweet," she said, spooning a savory spoonful of beef broth into my mouth. She handed me a whole bowl of it. WIthout a word, I took it
"Dear," she said. "You might not be happy to hear this, but Prince Charmont is coming to our house for dinner tomorrow night," she said hesitantly.
"Why?" I asked, my voice sounding uninterested.
"Hattie invited him over for dinner, and surprisingly, he agreed."
I nodded. I desperately wanted to see him, yet I knew I would be mourning all over again.