Rei Tantei Naruto Uzumaki
General AU to the VotE fight where Naruto dies. I'm borrowing from the Naruto, and Yu Yu Hakusho verse definitely, maybe a few others later if I feel like it.
(A/N): I own nothing. Not even the computer I am writing this on. I claim to own nothing and you will not get anything from a lawsuit so just leave me alone please.
Also, I know NO Japanese so if I mistranslate, then calmly send me a review with corrections. If I leave it as the English spelling that means that I don't know how to spell it. Either send me an accurate spelling or get off my case. While I would love to learn Japanese, I am not very good with languages and I do not have time to learn since I am in college. Cry about it.
I have been absent lately, and I have not updated, but I try occasionally to work on my story. New job will do that to you. Sorry it has been a while.
(End A/N)
--
(Previously)
"Orochimaru-sama, you must change bodies now. It is quite apparent that Sasuke is not coming right now. I recommend that you change bodies now and go retrieve him yourself."
"Quiet Kabuto! I realize that he isn't coming and I already am going to change bodies! Now I need your spies to find out something for me while I am recuperating from the change."
"Hai, you want to know where Sasuke-kun is being kept?"
"NO FOOL! Do not presume to know what I am thinking! If they haven't already killed the boy, it is because he made a final request. And I know that it will be the Kyuubi brat's funeral. Find out when it will be and delay if you can."
"You wish to kidnap Sasuke-kun there?"
"Well, not only that, but think of all of those grieving Konoha citizens."
"Orochimaru-sama?"
"Well Kabuto, don't you think that they should be able to say good-bye in a more personal fashion? How about face to face? Kukukuku…"
"Hai, I will prepare your new body and find a sacrifice from our ranks for you as well."
--
Chapter 5 --A Shinobi's Nightly Dreams--
As Yusuke and Naruto entered back into Koenma's office, Naruto was met with a loaded Botan-missile.
"THERE YOU ARE!! We were so worried! If you had gotten lost, then it would have been a disaster! Who knows where you might have ended up! Oh, hello Yusuke. I see you met Naruto."
"Yeah, the idiot wasn't watching where he was going and tripped over me while I was trying to take a nap out in the hall."
"I WASN'T WATCHING?! I will have…"
"Quiet you idiots!" the Third and Fourth Hokages and Koenma yelled from the table. Silence reigned and the three turned back to their work.
"So Botan, this kid telling the truth? He said he held the power of the Kyuubi for years."
"That's right Yusuke. His body and soul held back the demon for his entire life, with the use of his father's seal."
"Huh, I am an S-ranked demon and that thing was practically stomping me flat. Sure I could get a lucky hit in here or there, but the thing's power would brush all of my obvious attacks away like they were nothing."
"Kyuubi is powerful, but he is still a far cry from his fully powered self. His ninth tail has been partially absorbed and so he is weaker than normal. Had he been at full power, there is no way we could have stopped him. Anyway, Naruto are you ready to go see some people and tell them to hold off burying you? Once the seal is placed on you, we will have to go back to Earth since it will be almost morning there."
"Uh, ok. Why do I have to do that? Even if they bury me, I could Rasengan or Spirit Gun my way out once I wake up, right?"
"Spirit Gun? Yusuke! I am so glad to see you are making friends! You even taught the boy how to do your signature move!"
"Well, I didn't think he would get it at first."
"HA! That's why they call me Konoha's…"
WHAM!!
Three voices yelled out, "WHAT DID WE TELL YOU ABOUT BEING QUIET!?"
"Itai… what is with the hitting?"
Botan giggled. "Oh Naruto, you really need to learn how to be quiet sometimes. And to answer your question Naruto, no you can't. There is a whole process that has to deal with bringing back someone from the dead, and it takes a while. But also someone has to wake you up in human world too. But once we get this seal on you, and we get them to hold off burying you, then we can worry about that stuff."
"Oh, ok. I guess it is kind of cool to see the Old Man and Yondaime though. I don't suppose I can see Haku or Zabuza huh?"
"No Naruto, both of them were human and passed on beyond Spirit World. However, I found your file here before I went to pick you up. I saw the note about them and I figured you would want to know what happened after they died. I asked one of my other Pilot friends and asked about what happened after their death. The report read something like this: Spirit Zabuza initially tried to flirt with Pilot Hana, but was slapped for his efforts and stopped once he realized the nature of what type of being he was flirting with. Haku was respectful, but watched his master's antics and laughed quietly. Each chose to stay for their small service, both wanting to see your reaction to their lives. Afterwards, Zabuza made a comment about 'the hyperactive brat being an idiot for leaving my awesome sword there', but he also said that he 'was happy that he a burial rather than being left to the crows.' Haku was proud of your proclamation of your new 'nindo' and stated that he wished 'the two of you could have become better friends, but I am glad that he is following the path to true strength.' I would wager that you will meet them sometime on the other side later though, right Naruto?"
"You better believe it! There is no way I can quit going back to living now!"
"Oh, so he is getting the same deal as I got? Man that was a long time ago… good times… I miss having Keiko and Kuwabara around. But I guess that is one of the drawbacks of being part demon."
"What are you talking about? I heard you talk about being part demon, but I thought you just said that it made you tougher."
"Naruto, awakening the demon blood in my body gave me some of the attributes of my demonic heritage. In my case, my demon 'father' was able to live hundreds of years without eating anything at all, much less whenever he was actually eating. I still don't know how old he could have been, but it was surely thousands of years longer than I have been around, and I have lived through a couple of millennia myself. Yes, it made me strong as hell, but it also made me outlive every last friend I had. Eventually I came here to work, but that… is a story for another time."
"Man, that's kinda sad."
"Heh, well that is life sometimes kid. I want to do their memory right and do my job as I know they would want me to. Saving the world was a pastime of our little group of friends and I think that they would want me to continue like we would have if they were still there."
Botan interjected in the conversation, "Naruto, it is night time in Konoha. It is time to go."
"Ok Botan-chan."
--
The flight back to Earth wasn't nearly as talkative as the ride out was. As they neared Earth, Botan finally spoke up. "Do you know who you are going to talk to? If you do not delay your burial, then you will not be able to be brought back."
"Yeah. Sakura-chan, Tsunade baa-chan, Kakashi-sensei, and Sasuke-teme. I would get Neji since his eyes are so good and could show the proof, but he is hurt from the mission."
"Are you sure Naruto? If they don't believe your message then this is all for nothing."
"Don't worry! I got it covered."
--
(In Sasuke's dream)
Sasuke hated his Sharingan. It perfectly recorded every last second of Naruto's death and his conscious had set his dreams on "Tsukiyomi" mode and was repeating the last blow of the fight over and over again. His worst nightmare was inescapable since the true technique fooled your mind into experiencing the pain, but this pain was real, and there was no technique to dispel.
After what seemed to be the 4500th time, something new happened. While there was still the image of him killing his teammate, another Naruto appeared. The nightmare stopped and Sasuke seemed to fall out of place in the dream, as if time within the nightmare sequence had stopped. The out of place Naruto walked up to him and started talking.
"You know I realize that you disliked me and wanted that new Sharingan badly, but dreaming about my death after I am gone is ridiculous."
"This isn't a dream, it is a nightmare. I hate every second of it, and I regret everything you see here. And I never hated you Naruto or anything about you. Except for the orange suit you wear. I think everyone hated that."
"HEY! I love the orange. You think you are so much… wait… I have something to tell you, so quit distracting me!"
Sigh "Alright Naruto. What is it? Come to gloat about something or something else stupid before this nightmare continues? Just say your piece and leave. The dead haunting their killers is only for stories."
"Well I am gonna come back to life, so you had better stop my funeral! Then I can kick your ass fair and square! I have this deal with the guys on the other side, so I have to come back to life. That way I can change your nightmare from me dying, to you getting beaten in front of everyone and learning what humiliation is all about."
"You are coming back? What are you telling me for? I killed you. I can't even get out of my cell, much less stop your service."
"Just TRY dammit. If my body hasn't been proven that it is still alive, then they can bury me then."
"Whatever Naruto. When I wake up, I will tell the guards, but don't expect anything."
"Well maybe this will help you wake up!" Sasuke turned back just in time to see the fist hit his face.
Sasuke woke up. He rolled over and yelled for a guard. The late night guard slowly walked up. "What?"
"I would like for you to check Naruto's body and check for signs of life. I believe…"
"What you believe does not matter anymore. The boy's service will be held at 2 and you will die at three. Delaying tactics aren't going to prolong your life."
"I am not trying to delay my death; I am just trying to find out if he is really…"
"Kid, the body was checked. There is no life. Period. Now leave it alone."
--
(Sakura's dream)
There was a small pink haired girl crying in the corner of a plain white room. A reverse copy watched with contempt. When Naruto popped into the room, he wasn't even given a chance. Alter Sakura screamed, "Fake!!" Then she proceeded to hit him and he was thrown from the dream world.
(Kakashi's dream)
Kakashi was standing at the Team 7 training grounds. Sensei was there laughing at Rin & Obito's antics and he was smiling behind his mask. His team was rough housing in the usual manner, with Sasuke antagonizing Naruto, who would try to retaliate and would get stomped flat by Sakura. Suddenly, a new Naruto appeared with a small pop in the area. The ground's occupants turned and looked.
"Kakashi-sensei! Hey, you got to delay my service a couple of days. I am not dead yet. I am coming back!"
"Of course you aren't dead Naruto. You are right there." Kakashi pointed to his team who were watching with interest.
"I am not talking about your fantasy team here; I am talking about the real me! The one that died fighting Sasuke! Get your head out of the clouds!"
Kakashi woke. Looking around at his apartment, he saw his calendar with the appointment for his student's service on it. He shrugged and rolled back over. It had been a good dream anyway.
--
(Tsunade's dream)
Dan, Nawaki, and Naruto were all laughing together. The 3 men she loved more than anything in life were all here in one place. Her lover, brother, and surrogate son were all alive. They weren't dead and it wasn't her fault.
Suddenly Naruto shook his head for a minute and looked around at her.
"Baa-chan?"
"What is it brat?"
"Did you check my body? Or did someone else? I need you to check the cells and the body themselves, not just have a doctor scan for my body producing chakra. I may still be working. Can you make sure? Please? And if you find any sign of life at all… a single heartbeat, warm skin, anything… please delay the service. I need a couple of days of doubt. I promised I would make Hokage right? Believe in me, at least once more ok?"
Tsunade knew this was a dream. She knew that no one could have survived the blow Naruto received. There was no way… no way for a kid to learn an incredibly hard technique within a week? No way for a kid to pull her from the edge of the abyss of gambling and drinking her life away? No way that an idiot could match the opponents Naruto had faced?
"Okay Naruto. I will check."
--
(Meanwhile, in the rest of the world)
Shikamaru wasn't sleeping. He wasn't watching clouds either. All of those who knew him would have been shocked by both statements. But what he was doing would have made them attack him, absolutely convinced that he was a fake. He was training. It was incredibly late, and he knew that he would be expected to sleep the whole day (minus the funeral) anyway, so going to bed wasn't a problem. He wasn't going to let another mission go wrong. There would never be another incident like what happened with Naruto on his team ever again.
--
Ino dreamt fitfully. It wasn't unusual for an untrained Yamanaka to suffer the emotions of others after a death. It was expected. Some claimed to even be able to feel the emotions and thoughts of someone who had died, should the person and the Yamanaka be close, and if their death was recent. But this night was different. Ino and Naruto never interacted on a level to make them ultra friendly, he was unique enough for her to be able to determine him being present. It was an unmistakable golden shimmer around him. And while she wasn't awake or aware to notice, that shimmer was felt in town by her family's mental techniques. So while her father watched her sleeping, he heard a soft, "Naruto," before Ino rolled over again and resumed her fitful, but silent, slumber.
--
Hinata was crying. When Naruto had been brought into the hospital, rage at those people who had done this to him was all she could feel. But when she was out of their presence in her room, the weight of the situation came down upon her. Her first love was dead by his own friend's hands. Her support and will to better herself was dead. And so she cried, wishing she would wake up from whatever nightmare she had fallen into.
--
Princess Koyuki was not happy at being awoken. Yes there was an urgent message from Konoha, but still it could have… no… it couldn't have… it was impossible…
But staring up at her from the message was a truth that she had once thought was going to happen, but now refused to believe. There was no way…
She looked up at the messenger. "I am leaving for Konoha. Immediately. Wake whoever needs to come, or come if you want. But I will be gone before the hour tolls."
--
(A/N):
It has been a while, eh? Oops. Oh well. I know where this thing is going, so it isn't writer's block. It is merely finding the time to sit down a type it out. I am incredibly slow at coming up with how I want stuff phrased and I revise stuff every once and a while.