Marauder's Mistake
Chapter 3: Discussions and Difficulties
To say that Remus Lupin was not happy would have been an understatement. He strolled casually through the halls, lightly holding the little Slytherin boy in his arms facing forward so that the boy could eagerly point things out on their journey. However, both his fellow Marauders knew all too well that his cheerfulness was false; a happy front for the toddler in his arms and anyone they may encounter on their way to their dorm. It was the stiff set to the werewolf's shoulders that gave him away really, and both boys lagged behind enough so that they could speculate on how long they had to live once the wolf got them alone.
"Hey James?" Sirius hissed.
"Yeah?"
"How bad do you think this is going to be?"
James appeared to think hard for a moment and then looked seriously at his friend. "Do you remember when we put that potion in the Slytherin Quidditch team's shampoo that turned their hair pink?"
"Oh yeah." Sirius chuckled at that, it had easily been one of their best pranks ever.
"Remember what happened after?" he pushed on, frustrated with Padfoot's short memory.
Suddenly Sirius paled. "Oh surely he wouldn't do… that again James?"
"That's exactly what I'm thinking he's thinking."
"Damn it"
Remus turned around sharply and barked at them, "Don't use that language around Severus!!"
"They're naughty boys." Little Sev said, crossing his arms and pouting at them for making his new friend upset.
"Look who's talking you slimy git!" Black burst out despite James's hand on his shoulder, and he tried to take a threatening step towards the boy. He just has to be faking this, the greasy little potions freak!
Remus set the boy on his feet behind him and in a flash had grabbed his friend's upper arm as he reached for his wand. "If you even think about touching that I'll raise your robes and dust the seat of your uniform right here right now." He growled.
"He's faking!"
"He is not faking and if you'd pay attention you'd see that."
Black looked over Mooney's shoulder and studied the diminutive boy, a bit too skinny even for a four year old, with his overlong greasy looking hair and petrified expression.
"Maybe… but maybe he's a good actor." He said grudgingly.
Remus rolled his eyes, "You know what Padfoot? You just gained yourself the first trip on my knee." He promised, thoroughly unimpressed by his friend. Then he reached down and took Severus's hand and continued around the corner to the Fat Lady's portrait.
"Carpe Dium." He intoned, and the portrait opened graciously for the Marauders. Remus prayed that there would be someone trustworthy in the common room to watch their new charge while he "discussed" his friend's actions with them. His prayers were answered when he saw two fellow Gryffindors, Frank and Alice.
"Oh my stars!" Alice called, "It's true then Remus? That is Severus?" the girl with spiky brown hair raced over to them and looked at the little boy who was attempting with limited success to hide behind Remus's battered old cloak.
"Yes, actually I was going to see if you and Frank would mind watching him a minute or two." Lupin's smile was all but chilling.
Frank approached cautiously, "Err, sure Mooney. We'd love to."
Alice leaned down to Severus and smiled, "Want to come play with us for a bit sweetie? We have fun little chess pieces you could play with."
But Severus clung to Remus's leg and looked at him appealingly. "Mooney no! I wanna play with you!"
"Now Severus, I need you to be a big boy while I deal with your other guardians. You don't want me to be upset with you, do you?" he asked him nicely, but Severus didn't miss the firm edge in his Mooney's voice.
Sev quickly put both hands behind his back and fiercely shook his head, making his hair fly. "No! I be good Mooney!"
Remus nodded and ruffled the slightly greasy hair; We'll have to wash that tonight, "Good boy. You just play with Alice and Frank and I'll be right back down in time for lunch."
"Otay." He mumbled, pouting slightly but not wanting to upset his Mooney.
Remus nodded his thanks at their fellow Gryffindors before jerking his head at the stairs to the boy's dorms, clearly intending James and Sirius to precede him. Both boys did, looking like they were heading to an execution. When they reached their dorm room Remus shut the door and locked it, then used a series of silencing charms on the room to prevent anyone outside from hearing any… unusual noises. James sat with a huff on his bed and Sirius belly flopped onto his own dejectedly; both were thankful that the fourth Marauder, Peter, had left early for the holidays.
Remus opened the trunk at the foot of his bed and extricated a flat-backed oak hairbrush that was smooth and well polished on its bristle-less back. He took a seat on his own bed, facing the other Marauders with a grim look and setting the brush down within easy reach on his red and gold comforter.
"Okay, whose idea was this?"
James looked at Sirius, who was still face down on his own bed. Of course Padfoot; just leave all the explaining to Prongs, as usual. He thought bitterly.
"Erm, well you see, we both thought of it Mooney. That is, Padfoot found the recipe but we both devised it at the same time really. We didn't expect it to de-age him to a sprat though. It was only supposed to shave off four years at most."
Remus raised an eyebrow; "And that I suppose is meant to excuse what you two did?" he said sarcastically. "You both realize that if Severus's potion had been slightly out of order that cloud could have burned him, or worse? As it is, now we three are going to play 'daddies' to a four year old Snape."
Sirius propped his head on his arms, looking about as contrite as he usually did after pranking Severus Snape; which was not at all. James on the other hand had the self conscience to study the floor.
"It's not as if Snivellus has ever gotten a potion wrong before, the ickle potion master." Sirius grumbled at his fellow Marauder, disregarding the fact that he was currently on thin ice with the wolf.
"That's notthe point and you know it Padfoot!" Remus snapped finally losing his patience and causing Black to flinch.
"When will the two of you stop behaving like a couple of idiotic first years and stop putting Snape in danger?! I know you don't like the snarky git, I don't much care for him myself, but you both have to admit that you two are the ones who instigate most of the confrontations!"
Sirius snorted at this and Remus growled back. "Right, I can see I'm not getting through by ordinary means. In that case Padfoot, allow me to 'discuss' this further with your arse end. Maybe I'll make better progress that way."
Sirius gave Remus a glare that lesser students would have shrunk from, but sullenly got up and stalked to his friend.
Remus had long ago decided that the Marauders needed a bit of structure in their group. At the time, around the fall of their third year, both James and Sirius had whole heartedly supported it. Then the discipline had started. Since Remus was usually such a rule abiding safety nut it was not often that he wound up across James or Sirius's laps. Although when he had snuck to the library one night when he was supposed to be recuperating from the full moon Sirius had, admittedly, relished catching him and reddening his bottom for it. Sirius just didn't like being on the receiving end.
"You know the drill Sirius. Pants down please." Remus requested.
Sirius rolled his eyes and unhitched his belt and fly before roughly taking his school pants down, revealing a pair of Gryffindor red boxers with gold lions. Remus made no acknowledgement other than to grab his left bicep and haul him over his left thigh, tucking him under his arm.
"I'm really sick of finding you here Sirius." He sighed.
"You don't find me here Mooney; you put me here, remember?" he snapped back, despite his less than desirable position.
SMACK! Remus landed a sharp swat to the center of Sirius's boxer-clad bottom. "OW!"
"What was that Padfoot? I didn't quite catch it."
"Mmph, nothing." He grumbled.
"Good. Now since lecturing first didn't work I'm going to spank first. Then we'll try talking in a civilized manner." Having said that Remus abruptly yanked down Sirius's bowers and landed his palm briskly in the middle of his tanned cheeks. "James, pick a corner if you would." He said curtly as he peppered Sirius's backside with hard spanks.
Sirius twitched and bit his lips as the warm-up began, and his bottom was slowly and evenly heated by his friend's palm. He was determined not to make any sounds this time, after all it had been a perfectly reasonable prank and it was only Snivellus after all.
Remus quickly formed a circuit and went up Sirius's right buttock and down his left and around again several times till the bared tush before him was a dusty rose color. By now Sirius had begun twisting his hips under Remus's grasp to try to get away, but he just tightened his arm to keep him in place. Sirius had already begun making indignant yelps and groans, but Remus had yet to hear any really contrite sniffles, so it was with a heavy sigh that he jacked his left thigh up to arch Sirius's back and expose his sit-spots.
When Sirius felt his bottom arched up and out by Remus he hitched his breath. Oh Merlin no! Sirius tried to look over his shoulder at Remus desperately. This dog isn't above begging now and again! He thought to himself.
"Mooney please! Y-you're right! I shouldn't have concocted that prank with James! Snivel-uh- Snape didn't deserve it!"
"That's nice to hear Padfoot, but we both know you don't mean that for real. You just want to get out of your spanking." Remus said resolutely, and without further ado began soundly spanking at the unprotected and fullest part of the muscular bottom. Sirius growled when his plan failed and started yipping again as his bottom cheeks were flattened and sprung back by the werewolf's firm hand. He was quite certain that he would never be able to sit again as his backside felt like a dragon was roasting it, and worse yet he could see that damned hairbrush on the comforter!
When his friends sit-spot began to turn a slightly brighter red than the rest of his cheeks Remus was relieved to hear a heavy sob behind him, and saw his friends feet begin gaining purchase to stamp the thick carpet.
"Okay! Okay, Mooney I'm sorry! I'm really really sorry about Snape being a tod- OW- toddler again! It was stupid and I'm sorry! Please stop…"
"Easy Padfoot, nearly done now." He said as comfortingly as he could, reaching for the dreaded hairbrush with a grimace. He hated reducing Sirius to a dribbling puddle but damn him he couldn't keep up with these pranks! Especially the risky ones, he and James were lucky not to be expelled for this one. And Severus… well, he was just plain lucky in this case. With that in his mind, Remus was able to land ten hard smacks with the hairbrush, covering Sirius's taut behind and focusing the last three on his well tenderized sit-spot. When he had finished he threw the brush back on the bed and began rubbing slow circles in his friends back.
"It's all right now Sirius, cry yourself out. I'm right here." He murmured.
He needed no further encouragement than that; Sirius began sobbing for all he was worth, as much from the stinging pain in his hind end as from the embarrassment of being scolded again. "I, I really am sorry." He spluttered.
"Yeah well, I'm sorry too, but you guys can't keep up these risky pranks. You're lucky Dumbledore didn't have to expel you two, Snape's parent certainly would have been within their rights to ask for that."
"I know…" he mumbled, feeling sorry for himself and about as big as a Cornish pixie. When Sirius's breathing had settled back to normal aside for some sniffles Remus patted his head and stood him up. "Okay, go take James's place and keep that red arse on display please; no rubbing."
"Yessir." He said sadly, making his way to said corner and standing there with his head down.
Remus didn't need to ask James to come over; he had already stood by Remus's knees and was dropping his trousers. Once his black boxer briefs were revealed he began to apologize.
"Look Mooney, I'm not trying to get out of this but I just want you to know that I really do feel bad. I mean we didn't even think about how it could've gone wrong and all, we didn't want him hurt bad just embarrassed a little."
"All right, Prongs. I'm glad to hear that you're being responsible…" Remus said even as he tipped James over his lap, "now I just need to get you to think of that before you decide to mess with people's potions."
"I'm becoming more and more convinced." James offered helpfully.
Remus chuckled a bit, "Great, glad I'm getting through." He said, peeling the underwear down from his fellow Marauders bottom. Since James was already feeling lousy over what they had done it took Remus barely two circuits with his hand to have James wriggling in discomfort and hitching his breath. Without any warning he then tipped his right knee up and his left knee down, baring the sit-spots to more attention and grabbing the hair brush so he could finish. It was gut wrenching for Remus when they both got in deep trouble and he had to punish them both. Ten hard spanks later and he was finally able to toss the brush with a satisfying clack to the floor and begin rubbing circles in James's back.
Almost a half hour after the bad boys had gone upstairs with his Mooney little Sev was delighted to see his new friend come down the steps and back to the common room. Frank and Alice had been nice to him, and even let him play with the funny little chess men that smashed each other, but he really wanted his Mooney.
"Mooney! We played chess and I was even winning! Frank said so." He informed Remus, bouncing cheerfully around his legs and smiling.
"Wining eh? Sounds good to me." Remus replied with a grin, sinking into one of the comfy armchairs by the fireplace grate. Severus nodded excitedly, then looked at the other boys who had come back as well. They didn't look as mean as before, in fact…
"Hey! How come you bin crying?" he asked matter-of-factly, going over to the bigger boy with long black wavy hair.
"What?! I, I'm not- I wasn't crying." Sirius said indignantly, angry that the little brat had drawn Frank and Alice's attention to his red puffy eyes.
Severus tipped his little head and wrinkled his nose at the bigger boy. He didn't know why he was lying about crying, but he decided he needed a hug anyway. Hugs, he was convinced in his four year old brain, made everything better. So he swiftly wrapped his arms around the boy's knees, patting the back of them in a comforting manner.
Sirius stopped dead when he felt the tiny fragile arms imprison his legs. He looked down upon the little inky head and then helplessly up at Remus. Mooney of course was no help, he just sat there with an idiotic grin on his face and… oh Merlin! James was doing the same damn thing!
"Err, what are you doing Sniv-hem- Severus?" he had caught Remus's glare at the oft used insult just in time.
"I hugging you and making you better." Was the reply, said as though perhaps Sirius was lacking gray matter for having to ask.
"Ahh, of course." Sirius said; he was actually kind of touched really. The little boy obviously wasn't the Snape he knew, the one who instead would have taken the opportunity to take a cheap shot at Sirius with that oily smirk. Instead he was trying to comfort him. However, he wasn't exactly letting him go either…
Severus suddenly felt himself being picked up, one hand settling under his bum and the other going behind his shoulder as the bigger boy carried him over to join the others. Since he was now at a more appropriate level he hugged the boy's shoulders and began playing with his hair a bit.
"What's your name?" he asked.
"Sirius." was his awkward reply.
"Sir' us?" he said, his little mouth unable to pronounce the name properly. He tried pronouncing it like Remus.
"Uh, why don't you call me Padfoot?" Sirius offered helpfully; not too keen on hearing his name mutilated by the toddler.
"Padfoot?"
"Right-o." he nodded.
"Otay." Severus said happily. He decided he might like this Padfoot after all, he hadn't called him that mean name again, and he was even holding him up!
Suddenly the portrait hole opened and Lily came in carrying a picnic basket in her arms. "Hey there Sevvy! I brought lunch for us!"
"Lily! I played games and this is Padfoot and there are lots and lots of pictures in the school and they talk and walk Mooney says so and everything is really big and Padfoot was crying but now he feels better!" Severus babbled rapidly to fill Lily in on all that she had missed from when he last saw her in the Dumeldore man's office.
Sirius winced when the little big mouth mentioned him crying again and felt his face heat up as Lily looked at him funny. What was I thinking? How could I possibly like this little snake? Then all of a sudden the inky little head rested on his shoulder and he saw a tiny thumb pop into the boy's mouth. Oh yeah, that's how…
"There's enough for everyone, the house elves really outdid themselves." She explained to the small assembly in the Gryffindor common room. Frank and Alice however, stood hand in hand.
"Thanks Lily, but I think we'll go down to the great hall. It's the last day of classes after all, but I'll see you in Defense Against the Dark Arts." Alice said as they walked out.
Lily waved and then set the basket on the table, James rushing to help her unpack the sandwiches, jams, fruits, and pies that the elves had packed them. Sirius took the time to carefully seat himself on the well padded couch nearest Remus. Sev settled himself comfortably on his Padfoot's lap and grinned. This was going to be a good lunch, and he could feel his mouth watering already at what his Lily and, and…
"Hey! What's your name?" Sev's tiny voice piped up behind James.
"Why don't you just call me Prongs." James offered, since the little Slytherin was already using all their Marauder nicknames.
"Otay!" he said happily.
"Have you been a good boy today for your daddies?" Lily asked Severus. Sirius personally felt that calling them his daddies was going a step too far but then he supposed that the little tot wouldn't be able to manage to pronounce guardian if he couldn't get Sirius right.
"Yup! I'm always good Lily." The little boy asserted. Sirius rolled his eyes; We'll see how long that lasts.
"Well I'm glad to hear that Sevvy." She cooed at him, handing him a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.
In about ten minutes time Mooney, James, Lily and Sirius were astounded at the amount of jelly on Severus's hands, face, robes, and much to his disgust; Sirius himself. Sirius found out the hard way that having the boy eat whilst sitting in your lap was a very unwise thing to do, particularly when jelly was involved. To his growing horror, Lily was now handing the boy a piece of cherry pie.
"What do you think you are doing?" he asked irritably. James snorted and Remus chuckled at their friend's misfortune.
"Um, giving him his dessert? He did eat all of his lunch." She said reasonably, the pie halted in mid-transfer. Severus was currently stretching his little purple covered arms as far as they would reach towards the unattainable food.
"Paaaaadfooooooot! I want pie pwease!" Severus whined, stretching out the Gryffindor's name and making James and Remus laugh outright.
"Are you nuts?! We're wearing most of that lunch thanks, and I for one, do not want to add cherry to my wardrobe."
Sev turned to look up at Sirius with a heart melting puppy pout. "I be clean Padfoot, I promise." He said in a waifish tone of voice.
Even Sirius Black could not be resolute against such tactics. "Okay, but you're cleaning up after young man." He said; looking at James as if to say And I'd better get help too.
While Severus was occupied Lily filled the boys in on what would happen for the rest of the day. Dumbledore had released them from their remaining classes since it was the final day anyway and because Lily had volunteered to share her notes and bring them any assignments they may miss. The headmaster had also thoughtfully supplied a new wardrobe for the little boy that would be found in the trunk at the base of the spare fifth bed in the Marauders dorm room. This included tiny uniforms, robes and even some jeans and green and black sweaters for play clothes. He also wanted them informed that Severus's wand was safely in his office and that they were to keep the child away from their own wands, as he was likely to want to play with them.
"Right; well that should be all… I have to make it next class so any questions before I go?"
Right on cue Severus raised one cherry gooed and jam covered hand. (Though he had managed to contain said cherry goo to himself.)
"Yes Sevvy?"
"When I see Lily again?"
"After classes today, when I bring the boys their notes, but then I leave tonight for home." She explained calmly.
"Oh… Lily have to go 'way?" he asked in a wheedling voice.
"Yes Sev, I do."
"Otay." He said sadly. Lily smiled at him and, leaning over gave him a kiss on his somewhat sticky cheek. He brightened remarkably quickly at this bit of attention.
"I'll see you all later, bye!"
And with that the Marauders were left with their new charge for the afternoon.
To be continued…
AN: Hey there and thanks to all my readers! Also thank you for the amazingly positive reviews, this is my first fanfic and I'm glad people like it! That's all for now, but please keep reading and reviewing!