/It feels like I'm on the edge of nothing and I just want to let go and fall...down./
The ocean stopped at the tip of my toes as I stood looking over the clear ocean where the moon reflects off the waters. It had been exactly one week, three days, two hours, six minutes and fifty-five seconds since we arrived back at the islands.
Since our arrival I've stood on the edge of the very spot where we met with Kairi, Mickey, Goofy and Donald and their smiling, welcoming face. We all hugged each other and talked for hours until the Disney trio decided it was time to go back to their own world.
It was hard to see them go, because we all knew we won't ever see them again. We knew because all of our weapons, potions, magic, was gone. All of it. Didn't leave any traces it was there at all. Though I still feel a little bit dark inside, it comes out once and a while but its slowly fading away.
I dug my feet into the sand and breathed in the salty ocean scent and the cool breezy air. I came here often to think. Like about now. We came back and it was like nothing happened, we just…came back to where we left off and Sora and Kairi never say anything about it, maybe they are trying to forget. Sometimes I wonder if anything in the other worlds ever really happened at all. Or if their really was any other worlds out there.
I just went through hell of a journey and I'm still wondering if there really is anything; I chuckled softly to myself.
And Kairi, Sora asked her out a few days after we got back. When I heard the news, it was like something was ripped away from me, something from deep inside of me. I had to try to act so happy for them, when in reality I wasn't.
I don't really understand why though. I knew Sora was going to go to Kairi after everything and I accepted it. But why does it hurt so much now? How is it so different? Do I deep down want Kairi that bad or do I want- No! Of course not, Sora's my friend. If he's truly happy where he is at, then I will support him in anyway I can.
I sighed as I sat down in the sand. I was very happy to be back on the island and with everyone else but still…it's like…I enjoy the other worlds better.
Too bad I couldn't leave. I thought bitterly. Though I had promised I would stay with him through everything this time, I just. Can't. It feels like I'm still not strong enough to handle this.
Was it because of Sora and Kairi's relationship? Most of the bond, I bet, comes from Roxas and Namine. I clenched my fists. But I don't share that kind of bond and I never will. It was just something I had to deal with…gradually.
The water rose a few inches higher now lightly skimming my heels telling me that it was getting later. My legs were curled up to my chest my arms loosely wrapped around them though my fists are clenched tight not wanting to let loose.
Sora and I, we are competitive but that never meant I hated him. Never. I looked up at the stars wondering how many different worlds were in each one of them. Maybe, I could go back to the other worlds, start a new life. I had thought about it since Sora and Kairi started dating, I knew Sora and Kairi would be mad if I left, but it would work out. I'd visit if possible. I rested my chin on my legs and stared blankly back out into the sea. I want to go back to the worlds. It feels like I'm on the edge of nothing and I just want to let go and fall.
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I've noticed that Riku always went home, did his homework then walked to the quietest side of the beach and sat there all day staring out into the ocean.
I haven't figured out why though. Why he goes there everyday and just sits. It all started after I started dating Kairi. I confronted Riku about asking her out and to make sure there wouldn't be any jealously since I was asking her. He just kind of sighed, smiled a bit, nodded, ruffled my hair like he usually does and said ' Go get her, Sora.'.
It almost sounded sad but he said he was fine with it. Kairi noticed the behavior also and said "He's just sick. He had traveled so much he's missing always moving about, seeing, and meeting new people and place. Plus he was in the darkness for so long it will be awhile to get his strength back up. Don't worry, he'll be fine." But I do worry.
I sat and watched Riku, very well hidden, up in one of the palm trees. I swayed my feet as I listened to the waves hit each other. Very relaxing. Maybe this was why Riku came up here all the time?
I sighed inwardly; I wonder if-well I know Riku wants to leave. I can see it in his eyes, emptiness.
I saw Riku stand up and brush himself off then walk a little into the water then stop. I watched Riku in curiosity unsure what he was doing. I jumped a bit as my phone in my pocket vibrated signaling I had a text. I opened my phone to see a message from Kairi.
'Were r u?' Sora bit him lip unsure what to say back.
'Uh, I'm out, y?'
Seconds later…
'Yea I got that, I'm at ur house right now + ur not here.' I sighed inwardly, she could be so annoying. I checked my watch. 7:04. Yea she sure was needy.
'Well…just go back home or sumthing cause I'm busy.'
'Sora! Ur gf wants to spend time with u, u should give her the time while u still have it.' I rolled my eyes.
'I'll ttyl. Luv u.' I typed in then closed my phone.
Seconds later…
'Srsly?! You're gonna blow me off 4 Riku?! Yea I've been watching u 4 a while now. I'll talk to you about this obsession later Sora. Goodbye!' My heart thumped, how'd she know where to find me? I closed my phone not caring to much to text back.
I looked out to where Riku was standing, either the water was higher or he was going out farther, either way it was getting dark and dangerous. I looked down at my dangling feet. I didn't have feelings for Riku…at least I think I didn't. I mean, I love Kairi right? I'm dating her, that's how things are supposed to go.
Of course I wouldn't voice that to Riku, he would probably think I was weird and call me a freak or a fag. It's not like I don't get those often anyway but hearing it from Riku, seems like it would be so much worse. Usually I don't care what people think of me, not even Kairi, but with Riku, it feel like I have a personal standard to show him. I don't know why though. I always felt happy around Riku; he could always make me smile when I was down. It never felt like that with Kairi. I looked up at the sky. I loved my best friend.
I looked back down to see Riku walking farther out in the water. I shifted myself to see around the palm leaves of the tree to get a better view
What was he doing? Does he not know it's dangerous to go that far? The rip tide could pull him under or the sharks, jellyfish, could hurt him. The wind started to pick up a bit and the dark sky was covered with black clouds threatening rain and a huge storm. I looked horridly back at Riku who was still walking, slowly but still moving forward.
Oh gods, he's going to drown! I jumped out of the (realllllly tall) palm tree and landed on my back. I sat there for a moment trying to catch my breath from having the wind knocked out of me. Dang. I got back up and dashed quickly over to the shore trying to yelling Riku's name over the wind and the crashing waves.
I was almost to the shore line when I yelled out his name as loud as I could. Riku turned a bit and his eyes widened in fear. He was about to say something before a wave hit him and pulled him under.
I jumped into the water of where Riku disappeared and dove into the black rapid waters. I'm going to let Riku go. Riku said he would always be here to protect me, well this time I'm going to protect him. I wasn't going to lose Riku. Not again.
-StarsAtMidnight29
Yea still looking for that Beta Reader. I didn't go back over this so sorry for the mistakes and crap. Soooo, yea this will be revised soon (maybe) though. Review and tell me what you thought. (Yea its pretty bad writing and the story plot is sad, but that's what I was going for...well the sad part anyway.)
