I do not own any Twilight characters. I claim only my own. Thanks for the support on this one, guys!
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Kendra walked into her house and listened to the quiet. She felt very unsettled and decided to make dinner for a change, feeling like she needed the distraction. She prepared her homemade sauce for spaghetti, listening to her Ipod as she worked. She cooked the sausage as the sauce simmered, and she became immersed in her task as well as her thoughts. Edward's promise echoed in her ears, and the look on his face when she told him what she had done to herself haunted her mind. Why would anyone, vampire or human, want her now? She jumped when someone touched her shoulder, and found her father staring at her with concerned eyes. "Kendra?"
"Sorry, Dad. I had this playing and you scared me is all." Kendra told him, and he nodded slowly. She yanked out the headphones and set the Ipod on the counter.
"It smells wonderful in here, sweetie. Are you sure that you are up to this?" James asked her, and she nodded slowly. "I hate to ask you, but are you sure that you are up to dating Edward as well?"
Kendra wondered if the question was not actually if Edward was up to dating her at this point, but she smiled as she looked at her dad. "I think it'll be fine. We're not in any rush for anything, and it just kind of happened during this time we have been spending together. He's really sweet and not hard on the eyes either."
"I'll second that." Heidi agreed, walking in and sniffing the sauce. "That smells so good." She looked at her sister as Kendra rolled her eyes at her, and laughed. "You have shaken everything up, sis. Girls want to kill you for getting him, and guys want to be him. Our lunch table is in a frenzy. Maybe you'll be sitting with them now, I guess."
"Not always." Kendra told her, and smiled. She added the meat to the sauce and finished up the salad and bread before they sat down. "Are you comfortable with Edward being here like Alice is, Dad?"
"I guess I would like to get to know him. He is with my sweet and fragile daughter." James said, and she smiled at him. "I just hope he is careful with you. You have been through a lot, and he needs to respect that."
"Oh, he does. Actually, Carlisle suggested counseling, and I have agreed. It would not hurt to get it all out there, and I think it would help me a lot." Kendra said casually, not mentioning the real reason behind it. Her family knew about the rape, but not the real violence of it. She had not told anyone, and it was a truth that she intended to keep hiding from them.
"He knows what happened?" James asked her in surprise, and she swallowed the lump in her throat. Oops.
"They saw me faint at school. I had to tell them something, and Carlisle is really easy to talk to." Kendra assured him, scared that she was hurting him badly right then. "It was just the basics, Dad."
"The family knows? Edward knows?" James continued, and she slid her hands across the table slowly in a nervous movement. She glanced at him, and he looked tense.
"Not the whole family, obviously. I have talked at Alice some, and you guys know how nice she is. It is unavoidable. Edward knows a little as well. Carlisle is the one that suggested this colleague of his, being a doctor and all. He completely offered me the option. It was nice."
"I suppose so." James agreed quietly, and Kendra snuck a glance at Heidi. She looked hurt and as though she felt left out. Kendra bit her lip and felt like the worst person in the world. They were her family, for God's sake. But then she knew that she was trying to protect them from the reality, knowing now how harsh it really was Edward crossed through her mind again. The wondering if he was still there for her was going to be the death of her. They thanked about her dinner after it was over, and she smiled as she took small bites. Kendra watched a little television with them before going up to take a long shower, and she stood there for several minutes letting the hot water hit her tired body. She traced the scars slowly, feeling the unevenness of her skin and she felt a tear slide down her face. She felt so ugly sometimes when she thought about it. Kendra finished and dried off, brushing her hair and teeth and pulling on a tee shirt and sweat shorts. Her room was still empty when she got in there, and she turned off the light and curled up under the covers. She turned on her music and fell asleep after a few moments that night, and she woke up to her alarm the next morning.
She sat up and looked around to see the room empty, and her heart dropped. She desperately searched for a sign that he had been there, but her room looked the same as it had the night before. Kendra jumped out of bed and brushed her teeth quickly, putting on some make up in her room before she got dressed. She pulled on a long tee shirt under her green one that Heidi had given her, and covered that with the new expresso pea coat that Alice had bought for her one a shopping trip. She wore her favorite jeans and converse and headed out the door with Heidi, trying not to look like she was falling apart. She sipped coffee quietly, and her eyes scanned the parking lot as they took their usual spot. The Cullens pulled up in Edward's car at the same time, and she stared at them as they got out of the car. Alice was smiling happily at Jasper, and waved her way as her and Heidi got out. Ok, so things were good there. Emmett and Rosalie got out and he smiled at her, while Rosalie gazed doubtfully at her today. Edward got out last, and she let out an audible sigh as she saw him. He wore the blue shirt that made him seem even more beautiful than he already was, and he gazed at her across the parking lot. His face was peaceful, and his eyes roamed her face easily as she stared at him. "You have it bad for this guy, Ken." Heidi told her, and Kendra glanced at her. "Look at you. You seem like you didn't think he would be here or something."
"We had a small disagreement, that's all. Stupid phone fight." Kendra said quickly and falsely. She felt Heidi's eyes on her, and tore her gaze away from him to glanced at her stepsister.
"I remember being so hopeful when I heard that you were moving here. I thought we would be close and bond the way I had always wanted." Heidi looked at the Cullens with a sad expression. "I see who you want to be close to. You even talked to them more about David than you did Dad and I."
Kendra stared at Heidi sadly. "I cannot hurt you by sharing it, sis. Don't you realize that? I can't even truly share it with any of them. It is not a pretty reality, and I have trouble living with it myself." She hugged Heidi tightly, and her stepsister hugged her back. "I love you, sis. I really do."
"I love you, Kendra." Heidi told her, and Kendra felt tears in her eyes. The sisters laughed as they both realized they were crying, and wiped their eyes.
"I will talk to you. I promise. I never realized how much I was hurting you and Dad this whole time. I really don't want to make him feel worse than he already does, you know? "
"He'll be a lot better when David is gone. Is Edward going to be a stand up guy if that day comes?" Heidi asked evenly, and Kendra glanced at her to see that her eyes were angry.
"More than you can imagine. He has some brothers that might be along for the ride." Kendra told her, keeping it to herself that Edward could easily handle it himself.
"Tell them to make it count." Heidi said firmly, and Kendra nodded. The girls walked forward, and Kendra found Edward's face again. He smiled at her and she felt her heart jump at the way his eyes held hers warmly. Heidi greeted Edward and Alice with a smile, and Kendra hugged her again tightly. Edward watched as Heidi walked away and stroked Kendra's face with cool marble fingers.
"You two okay?" His voice was soft and concerned, and she nodded.
"Are we?" Kendra whispered, and he took her hand as they walked slowly inside. The rest of the Cullens were heading to their classes, and Alice blew Kendra a kiss as she danced down the hallway.
"Why would we not be?" Edward asked her, his face close to hers as he leaned closely to her to meet her lips lightly.
"You didn't come to my room last night." Kendra accused him, and he laughed lightly.
"Of course I did. You were actually sleeping, peacefully and beautifully. I have never seen you do that. I could not bear to wake you up, despite the fact I did want to hold you and talk to you." Edward assured her, and she felt a smile on her face.
"Oh. What did you do?" Kendra asked him.
"I watched you with envy. I wish that I could sleep like that, warm and secure." Edward told her, and she looked at him with sympathy in her eyes. "I also liked it when you said my name."
"Um, I did?" Kendra asked, blushing.
"Yes, you did. You asked for me in your sleep." Edward assured her, a pleased smile on his face. "I want you to be happy, Kendra. I want you to feel…..special. Do I make you feel that way?" His amber eyes were burning into hers as they searched for an answer and she tried to catch her breath.
"More than you know." Kendra told him, her voice nothing more than a whisper as she had trouble speaking. "I need you." She pulled his face down to hers for a kiss as slid her arms into his tousled hair, and he groaned against her lips. The bell rang into their ears, and she jumped as he was pulling her body closer to him. "Damn it."
"I will find you later." Edward promised her, and she felt confident in those words as she ran to class. She invited Heidi to sit with them at lunch, and she accepted and took a seat next to her sister. Everyone was kind with the exception of Rosalie, who seemed to be seething even more. Heidi got to know the mysterious Cullens for that short time, and left with a small smile on her face as she joined her friends. Alice and Kendra planned yet another shopping trip for that afternoon, as Alice eyed Kendra's jacket with an approving smile. Kendra agreed, and asked to invite Heidi and Alice eagerly agreed. The girls shopped for a couple of hours and then the sisters headed home to make a quick meal for James. They made chicken enchilada casserole and it was on the table as he walked in, and then they went upstairs to talk and watch a movie for awhile. Heidi grew tired towards the end and went to bed, and Kendra left the movie on as she got ready for bed in the bathroom. She pulled on long tee and some small cotton shorts, and returned to her room to see Edward watching the scary movie she had been enjoying.
"Hi." Kendra whispered, and he grinned at her as he patted the bed next to him. "How is it that you never get caught being here?" She sat down next to him, and he rolled onto his side to face her.
"I know they're coming long before I could ever get caught." Edward assured her, and she smiled as she looked at him. "Don't the subtitles distract you from enjoying this movie?"
"No. I like these creepy movies. The scary thing in the corner always makes me jump." Kendra told him, watching the original version of The Grudge with curious eyes.
"Do I make you jump?" Edward asked her, and she met his curious gaze for a long moment.
"Not from fear." Kendra replied, moving to rest against him unconsciously.
"I am part of these scary movies. Not personally, but in theory. Vampires can do bad things." Edward told her, and she nodded. "I will always try and have the best control around you. I promise that." He eyed her bare legs slowly, and his eyes deepened in the dim light. "You do….tempt me in many ways though and I falter sometimes."
"I trust you, Edward." Kendra said, staring into his face. He reached around and pulled her to him for a long kiss, and she memorized the feeling of his lips. She slid her arms over his chest, feeling his muscles tense up as she touched him. He gripped her head tightly as he deepened the kiss, and then pulled away suddenly.
"You make me……" Edward's voice trailed off and she took a deep breath.
"Same here." Kendra agreed softly, and they stared at each other for a moment. She slid down to where she was laying beside him, and he slid an arm around her. She closed her eyes and he stroked her hair gently as she relaxed beside him. "Do you hate me for being so…..reluctant?"
"I am much the same way, love. I can hurt you when we are together and I don't want that." Edward kissed her forehead, and she sighed.
"Are we hopeless?" Kendra asked, almost not as a real question.
"No. We just need time to sort it all out. I have a lot of that to offer." Edward assured her, and she laughed softly. She slid an arm around him securely and let him soothe her to sleep as her heart stopped pounding slowly.