Title: With You
Chapter 3: The Return of Rex
Author: Devylish
Genre: Romance/Humor
Fandom: NCIS
Pairing: Abby/Tony
Rating: PG-13
Summary: 3 more vignettes covering various parts of Tony and Abby's life together. Part of a 50 prompts assignment.
Spoil/Warn: Season 5. And btw… I DO love mcgee, but I he made a great foil.
Disclaimer: I'm of the 'nothing ownage' world. Please don't sue!
AN: Betaless, per usual… sorry!
Word count: 1528

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"So I said: 'Bitch, please!', and then I stepped up and snatched the boots back out of her hands." Rex settled back onto the couch, crossing his legs and watching Abby as she stroked the proclaimed 'fierce', black and white boots.

"I think I love them!" Abby affectionately caressed the fake cowhide platforms. "No. I know I love them. I love them as much as I love Bert. And I may even love them as much as I love –" she stopped mid sentence and looked up at Rex. "Erh, let's just say I really, really love them."

Rex leaned forward with an inquisitive smile. "Mmm, mmm, mmm. I'm sorry Sweetie… you'll have to finish that sentence for me. 'You may even love them as much as you love'… who?"

"Maybe I was going to say 'as much as CafPows!'?"

Rex laughed, "Sweetie, you don't love anything as much as you love CafPows! those things are like air to you…." He sat back and cocked his head, "No, if I'm not mistaken, you were going to say that you love my little gift almost as much as you love a certain handsome co-worker who originates from Baltimore?"

Abby's face scrunched up…. "Umm, pleading the fifth?"

"You're not in court Doll, but I'll take that as a 'yes Rex, you're once again so right it's scary!'"

He picked a piece of lint off of his chocolate brown linen pants, "So does the sexy Mr. DiNozzo know you love him?"

"I don't even know I if love him."

"Is he all you think about? Could you maybe imagine giving up CafPows! for him…? Does he make your legs quiver? Your heart thumpity thump thump? Do you forgive him his little foibles? And his big foibles? Speaking of which, just how big IS his foible?" Rex paused half a beat. "Never mind, we'll come back tot that question. As I was saying, if even half of your answers to my questions is 'yes', Abby, darling, I'm sorry, but you're in love." Rex air-quoted the words 'in love'.

Abby plopped down on the couch next to Rex and hugged her new boots to her chest. "Well crap!"

Rex laughed. "Well if it's any consolation darling, I DO think he loves you back."

Abby stared. "Rex, you've met Tony… what? Three times, for like a total of 25 minutes? How can you say that you think he loves me?"

"Darling…, I know of what I speak. I have eyes; 20-15 eyesight as a matter of fact. He looks at you – when he thinks no one else is looking – as if he's in awe. He's not a 'hugging' man, but he takes, expects, and gives hugs to you. He's not an emotional man, but he knows you're a safe place for him… he'll tell you pretty much anything you want to know. And he'd give his life for you. I saw that in his eyes every time he looked at you. Every time he thought he wasn't being watched."

Abby shook her head at him, "Rex… Tony would lay down his life for anyone on the NCIS team, for anyone who was in danger… it's part of his job description… part of his make up."

"Well of course he would! And I wouldn't want anyone less 'giving' for my little Abby. But just because it's in his job description, doesn't mean that his willingness to 'serve and protect' should be reflected so obviously in his eyes. I've seen him look at that fierce Ziva David, and that cute lil' Timothy McGee, and that look isn't in his eyes for them. The only one I've seen him look at with anything near the intensity that he looks at you, is your steely Gibbs. Now, him, your Tony loves; him, he'd lay his life down for… and it's in his eyes. But, as a gay man, I can tell there's no sexual tension there. I think your Anthony looks at Gibbs more like a father figure." Rex picked up his wine glass and swirled the golden liquor around, "I will be your father figure, Put your tiny hand in mine, I will be your preacher teacher.…" Rex melodically hummed the rest of the chorus. "Actually, if either Gibbs or your Anthony swung that way, I'd think you have competition. But alas, the two of them are each so straight it hurts cute little bent me."

"You are cute." Abby curled her feet up on the couch and leaned her head onto Rex's shoulder. "Cute but deluded. Even if I did admit to having feelings for Tony… which I'm not, I can't believe that thirty minutes of observation has proven to you that he has feelings for me."

"Sweetie, believe me, Anthony DiNozzo is loco for you."

"Loco? Is Jorge teaching you more Spanish?"

"He's trying, but I'm rather hopeless."

Abby sniffed sadly, "I think I'm rather hopeless too."

"Well never fear, I'm 'hopeful' for you. And honestly, if opposites like Jorge and I can click, you and Anthony are a shoe in."

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"Wha-what are these?" Tony held the blue box up for Abby's inspection. His fingers barely grasped the box, and he held it out at a distance, apparently afraid of contamination.

Abby looked up from she sat on his bed and broke into a grin… what she wouldn't give for a camera! The look of fear on Tony's face was priceless.

"Honey, those are tampons."

Tony rolled his eyes. "I'm aware they're ta-tampons. What are they doing here? In my apartment…, in my bathroom?" He set the box carefully on the edge of the bed and then stepped back a few steps, putting distance between himself and the 'box of evil'.

"They're not particularly 'doing' anything Hon; other than sitting around and waiting to be used." Abby bit back the smile that was teasing the edges of her lips.

"In my house… you forgot to address the 'in my house' part!"

"Tony, you're dating a woman."

"A fact I'm happy about."

"Women are physically different from men."

"A fact I'm very happy about."

"Women, once a month, menstruate."

"STOP!"

"…and when we do, there are certain feminine products that we need that help us through that process."

"I said 'stop'!" Tony swallowed. "Ummm again, I have to ask, what the blue box of feminine stuff is doing in my house."

Abby sighed, and crawled across, and off the bed. Walking toward Tony she placed her hands on his biceps and stared him in the eyes. "Okay, I won't tease you anymore." Abby patted him on the cheek. "In case you haven't noticed Mr. DiNozzo, I spend as much time here, at your place, as I do at mine. It makes sense that I keep all sorts of supplies here in your place… just to make life easier for both of us."

Abby turned away, picked the box up off of the bed, and carried it back into the bathroom.

"All sorts of supplies?! All sorts… what else do you have hiding in my place?!"

Abby's laughter rang out from the bathroom.

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"So I hear congratulations are in order… again?" McGee extended his hand to Tony in the time-worn congratulatory manner of men throughout the western hemisphere.

"Tim. Yeah. Again. Thanks." Tony shook his ex-coworkers hand. He and McGee hadn't worked together in about three years. They still got together, with the wives, about once or twice a year, but the lines of communication really ran between Abby and Ziva. "Abby told me that congratulations are due to you and Ziva as well; your second child is due in a couple of months?"

"Yup." McGee beamed. "Another boy." He stood a little straighter. "Uhh, you and Abby? Do you know the gender of this baby yet?"

Tony paused, "Mmmm, no. Abby wants to wait and 'be surprised'."

"And you guys have two girls… right?"

Tony knew that McGee KNEW that he and Abby had all girls. So why the question? "Two beautiful girls."

"Huh. Really kind of odd, when you think about it…. Ziva and I with our two boys. Palmer and Lee with their two boys. Even Jen and Gibbs have a little boy." Timothy placed a hand in his pocket and rocked back and forth on his feet.

"Odd?" Tony raised an eyebrow, silently daring McGee to spit out what he thought he was trying to spit out.

"Well, scientifically, you know it's the man who determines what gender the child will be."

"And?" Tony leaned against the wall and waited McGee out.

"Well, I guess," McGee flushed a little, but pushed on. "I would have thought, with you being the big stud in the office all those years, and everything, that you would have found it in you to uhhh," he scratched the back of his neck, "produce a boy, or two."

Tony grinned darkly, McGee was going to regret trying to 'out-man' him. "Hey McGee, did Abby get a chance to tell Ziva yet that the last ultrasound showed we're having twins?"

Prompts: 'Bitch, please', tease, regret