I do not own Zim, Gir, Dib, or any of the original characters from Invader Zim.
Zim paced back and forth in the livingroom of his freakish house, nervously babbling to himself while Gir tried to cram a whole papaya into his mouth.
"What am I going to do? I have underestimated the intellegence of these Earth monsters. They've-They've been wise to my otherwise ingenius plot of destruction all along! Perhaps even knew of an invasion since before Operation Impending Doom II was even comissioned! Someone must've tipped them off…This Bobby person…He must have arranged this whole thing. They're all being led by him; an Irken rebel…IRKEN!!… Bent on usurping the Almighty Tallest! What's more, they've teamed up with Agent Mothman; who through my superior knowledge and instincts must be… Yessss! MUST BE!! None other then that horrible human beast of disgustingness…DIB" Zim said, vomiting the very name as if it were some fiendish horrible ball of phlegm.
"He must've been behind this all along! Who would have guessed that he has been in league with Irken traitors… TRAITORS!!…How many more Earthling enemies of the Irken Empire has he been able to rally up against the Tallest? HOW MANY? HOW MANY!?" he shrieked, wringing his hands anxiously.
"Ohh! I know! I know!…Oh wait…. No I don't, " giggled Gir, sitting in a slimey pile of papaya pulp and drool. He began to blow bubbles with the orange sludge as it dribbled between his teeth.
"I can't allow it to happen… I can't let these FILTHY ROTTEN EVIL SPIES attempt an affront to my beloved Almighty Tallest! I must stop the Dib–Stink!" said Zim, suddenly dashing into the kitchen. He leaped into the toilet near the refrigerator and flushed it, dissappearing down the bowl into the elevator shaft below.
Gir began to slide across the livingroom floor in the strange fruity substance he'd created with the mutilated papaya as if it were a Slip n' Slide. He crashed into the wheeled feet of the Robomom, knocking her over. Her head fell off and rolled under the couch. (She was a type of android that Zim had built to keep up the appearance of having a normal Earthling family. And as far as he knew, normal Earthling mothers often do lose their heads on a regular occasion.)
"Honey, I've seemed to misplace my head again," came her voice from under the couch. "Honestly, if it weren't attached to my shoulders, I'd misplace it again and again and again and again and again and again and"-
Her flailing, sparking body repeatedly rammed into the wall with every "and again" she spoke.
After a moment of watching this with vague interest, Gir decided to go see what his master was up to. He cartwheeled and summersaulted into the toilet.
Down in the lower chambers of the base, Zim sat grimacing in front of an observation screen. Gir stared up at his master, his round blue lenses growing wider with interest.
"Whatcha doin?" Gir sang.
"Silence, Gir! I'm in need of utilizing my utmost undivided concentration. I am monitering the exterior of the Dib-Monkey's abode in attempt to track all outgoing transmissions. I want to see if he communicates with any of his TREACHEROUS, HORRIBLE Earthling allies. That…Bobby person, the wretched Irken Traitor…sent that transmission to contact SOMEONE on this filthy planet, and he instructed that SOMEONE to contact Dib. I'm going to find out who that SOMEONE is-"
"But I thought he said it was his Momma. LOOKS LIKE HE LOVES HIS MOMMA SO VERY VERY MUCH!!"chirped Gir, hugging himself gleefully.
"SILENCE!" shouted Zim, unappreciative of being interrupted by his little robot minion. "And the moment this SOMEONE tries to send a transmission to him, I will be able to trace their locations, and then they will suffer the SCAREY AWESOME WRATH OF THE ALMIGHTY ZIM!!" he said. "Now go away… Go play with your rubber piggies or something."
"WHEEEHEEHEEHEEE! PIGGIES!!" squealed Gir, scampering off.
After about six hours of watching the outside of the big grey Membrane house, Zim was able to find nothing leading to the whereabouts of Bobby's Earthling allies. A few things happened; the Dib-Creature's frightening little sister took out the trash, and a horrifying little dog took a whiz on a nearbye fire hydrant. Finally, all the lights in the house went dark.
"GGGGGGRRRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOGGGGGGHHH!! I have been watching and watching and found NOTHING!! There must be some way of finding out who the transmission was sent to!" said Zim finally.
"Computer… CompuTERRRR!! Tell me how to find the location of the intended recipient of the transmission," he said.
"The address of the transmission should be listed on the very message itself. Location could be found by simply looking at the address," came the male voice of the base's artificial intellegence unit. Zim stared blankly at the screen. A moment passed as the soft, squeaky sounds of Gir snoring at Zim's feet could be heard over the low, ever droning din of the base's equipment.
"INGENIUS!" Zim shouted finally, startling Gir awake. A frightened Gir ran screaming across the room, running headfirst into the flat wall unit on the other side. He fell to the ground there, unconscious and sucking his thumb peacefully.
"I have thought of what to do!" said Zim aloud. "The address of the transmission should be listed on the very message itself!! The location could be found by looking at the address!"
"Uhhh… That's what I just said," said the computer.
"Computer! Decifer the intended address of the transmission and calibrate exact coordinates," said Zim.
"Ugggghhh… Fine," sighed the exasperated computer.
Zim cackled maliciously to himself, rubbing his little gloved hands together. "We're going to pay these pitiful Earthling Revolutionaries a little surprize visit…"
That's it for now. Hope you like it this far…E.V.