Quiet: Sorry for the long delay. I've been...distracted by Grand Fantasia. Cute little MMO, and I'm slightly obsessed. XD

To make up for being lazy, I give thee more than normal, lol.

Zack/Everyone
When the puppy jokes go too far.

The boardroom doors opened with crash and a bang, and in stepped Zackary Fair, proudly sporting a set of floppy dog ears, a plastic muzzle, a false tail, and paw-shaped gloves and slippers.

Angeal ran his hands down his face as his student barked and trotted over to him before wiggling his bum to make the tail wag. He felt a dull flush start on his face and put his head on the table in defeat.

"Alright, I get it. No more puppy jokes. Now can you please go put some pants on?"

------

Spin the Bottle
Genesis doesn't kiss on the lips

Drunken catcalls rose through the air, and Cloud found himself reddening like a ripe tomato.

How do I get myself into these things? He wondered for the umpteenth time.

"C'mon, Spike! Just do it! He doesn't bite!"

"At least not on the first date," Kunsel joked, causing a wild riot of laughter to break out.

The blond gulped and looked over at who the bottle had landed on.

Genesis smirked and suddenly stood, and Cloud wondered for one panicked moment if he was going to take his kiss—but the First merely sauntered over to the coat closet and opened the door. Those auburn brows rose as gloved hands mockingly waved the cadet over.

"Come come now, we haven't got all day, do we?"

"Uh y-yes, sir!" he chimed, scrambled off the floor to another round of booming laughter. He was blushing so hard, it felt like his head was going to explode.

The door closed behind them and Cloud squawked in alarm as hands suddenly attacked his belt buckle. He pressed himself back against the wall to avoid the aqua eyes gleaming at him in the near-darkness.

"Sir! What the…?"

Genesis smirked. "I never kiss on the lips, cadet."

Cloud squeaked.

------

Genesis/Tifa
It shouldn't be too hard to catch a cowgirl since he was such a fine ride.

Genesis perched himself on top of the Nibelheim Inn, his sharp eyes staring into the window across the circle that he knew belonged to Tifa Lockhart, the childhood friend of SOLDIER Second Class Cloud Strife.

The little nuisance had become a prodigy under the tutelage of Angeal's puppy, and it annoyed him to no end that the little brat had foiled his plans to see Sephiroth on multiple occasions. Not only that, but a lot of the missions the little golden boy took were missions that decimated his forces in important areas. So what was the best way to strike at a SOLDIER who was young, healthy, and probably stronger than he himself was in his currently deteriorated state?

Genesis smiled as he watched the young woman pull her ridiculous-looking hat off.

It shouldn't be too hard to catch himself a little cowgirl, since he was such a fine ride after all.

He stood and allowed his wing to manifest before forming his signature flare attack in one hand and launching it at multiple buildings. The startled look on the girl's face was worth it, and as she looked up and saw his smiling face bathed in the red-orange light of flames, there was but one thing on her mind.

Cloud...

------

Reno and Zack
Sharing porn collections. Who has the most outrageous porn???

"Read em and weep, SOLDIER boy."

Zack looked at the stack of magazines Reno slapped down on the table, quirking a brow as he eyed some of the more outrageous names.

The other brow shot up. "Hangman's Weekly, for your gravity-defying pleasure. Reno, why the fuck do you have porn of people getting fucked upside down?"

"Hey," the redhead said, reaching across Zack and picking up a skin mag with multi-colored men wearing matching crotchless speedos on it. "I could ask the same about why you have Rainbow Ride in here."

"Pffft!" Zack spread out Reno's magazines, casually scanning them as Reno gathered a few of his and poured over them. "The Adventures of Righthand Man and Dildo Boy? Hammer Me, Mr. Repairman? Cock, Lock, and Shock? What the fuck, Reno?"

"I wouldn't talk if I were you," the Turk countered. "Big N Beefy: Muscular Babes, Spank and Yank- nice diamond collar on the cover, yo- and…" He paused, looked at Zack, then burst out laughing.

"What?" the other man asked defensively, reaching out to snatch the magazine, but Reno arched backward to keep it out of his reach, snickering when his friend sulked and began pouting.

"And Then They Came: Invasion of the Anal Tentacles. Dude, what the hell?"

Horrified, Zack flushed and snatched the magazine away, only to see that Reno had been bluffing. "Lying son of a bitch," he grumbled, inwardly relieved that it was just his male to female cosplaying mag.

There was an unholy gleam in the redhead's eye as he assessed Zack's reaction. "So, wanna try some of the stuff in Hammer Me?"