Chapter Twenty-Two
Lily's Secret
When Snape entered the cottage it was easy to see that the Dark Lord was looking for something. The place was ransacked and every single item in the rooms on the lower floors was scattered about, torn, ruined, destroyed. Snape studied the layout and listened to the noises coming from the upper floor.
He prayed that his skills to block Voldemort's occlumency would be enough. He knew his Double could not be forced to give away the information. As long as he could keep himself sorted out and not forget that he was the real Snape then he could control the Doppelganger. He had learned that much. The moment he had turned and looked into the face of his twin they were united; becoming one mind, one person. Every minute that the Doppelganger existed their thoughts paralleled one another more and more. Soon, they would think with one mind. The Double still questioned and talked to him but this was fading.
"Are you ready?" It asked.
Snape nodded and began to climb the stairs. He heard the faint Pop! outside and knew that Potter and his friends had apparated. He turned to his Double. "One of us must go out to warn them."
"You go," It said. "He won't believe a copy of the real Snape. He will see through you in a heartbeat. I will go to him and persuade him that I know where the Horcrux is."
Snape was hoping for this. He hesitated for an instant just to fool the Doppelganger into believing that he was unsure of this hasty plan. The Double carried a faded image of the scar that now graced his face but it was so dim it was clear that it was not real. Snape wondered if this would work and then decided he had no other choice. It feels very bizarre, not even being able to trust your own Doppelganger, he decided.
"I insist," the Snape double hissed. "Besides you will know what is happening inside because we share the same thoughts; however onerous that is for me."
Snape stared at the obsidian eyes of his twin and almost smirked. It's true. I am a bit arrogant. He was happy to see that the Double thought he knew what was going on in Snape's head. And it was clear that he didn't. We are still separate so far, he mused.
Snape bowed his head in acquiesance and returned to the foyer glancing back once to see his heels disappear up the stairs. He exited the house. He found only the two, Granger and Weasley.
"Where is Potter?" he asked.
Hermione held a mirror up and studied it before answering. "We don't know. We thought he was behind us. Why are you here?"
A instant later a figure popped into existence a few feet away. It was the boy. He saw them and moved quickly. "Is it done?" he asked.
"No," Hermione grunted in exasperation. "This is the real one."
Potter turned to him and then glanced over to the house. Every window was lit from within.
For Snape, it was very strange. He stood in the dark, in the garden and listened and spoke to Potter and his friends and yet at the same time he stood in the door of the nursery and faced Voldemort. He wondered if he was going to be able to function at all as two people. He could hear Voldemort speaking to him.
"Snape," the oily voice hissed. "Why this is a surprise."
"Master."
"How did you find me?" Voldemort asked stepping over the refuse in the middle of the floor. The crib was crushed and every item in the room dismembered and scattered. Voldemort held a letter in his hand and he'd been reading it when the Double stepped into the room. It appeared as if it had fallen out of a diary, which lay shredded on the floor.
"I know of the Doppelganger," the Double said.
Voldemort stopped, studied his face and then nodded. "Yes. Sorry about that, Severus. But it was a clever thing to do I must say. Dumbledore was surprised that you killed him in the end, I think."
The Double nodded, knowing that he had seconds before the wizard would kill him. "I also know about the Horcruxes."
That stopped him. Voldemort froze in place, his wand hand up and already pointed at Snape's chest. He was lightening quick.
The Double continued, "I have two of them. I will give them to you and in turn you will destroy the Doppelganger and let me leave in peace."
Voldemort was silent, absorbing the news.
"I have the locket and the golden Phoenix," The Double said to support his claims.
"Where are they?" Voldemort asked. But his question was unimportant because he was in front of the Double in a flash staring into the false Snape's eyes. He was using occlumency.
Outside, the real Snape suddenly spun on his heels and headed for the castle. "We must hurry!"
The three caught up to him.
"The Double is with him?" Hermione asked. "HE...You-Know-Who's at the cottage? But that was not the plan."
"The plan has changed," Snape answered. He stopped on the stairs leading up to the ruin and glanced over at the faint light shining from the windows. He stood there in the dark and yet he also stood in the lighted room.
Voldemort's reaction to the discovery was immediate.
"Aghhhhh!" The Dark Wizard groaned and stepped away. "You are the Doppelganger!"
The false Snape shook his head in puzzlement. "No. No!"
Voldemort nodded, "Yes. You are. Which means that the real Snape has looked on your face and he is in there somewhere listening." The wizard smirked and held up the paper in his hand.
The Double was studying his hands and not paying attention.
"Snape, I know you're listening," Voldemort said grinning. "Do you know what I have here?" He wandered the room pushing aside things with his foot and basically ignoring the Double. "I have a letter written by Lily Potter to you. It seems that she decided not to send it to you."
The Snape on the stairs of the castle once again halted.
"Mr. Snape, you have to bring your Double here," Hermione insisted. " He must be inside with the Horcruxes."
Snape ignored her and turned to Harry. "Come here!"
Harry hesitated and then climbed the stairs to join him. "What?"
Snape drew his wand and took a deep breath. "I am going to put a spell on you Mr. Potter. Please don't ask me what it is and why I'm doing it. Our plans may go astray this evening and it is a protection."
"But..." Harry barely breathed the word before Snape was showering him with a rain of gold sparks. The man then stepped into the circle and the sparks turned to a blood red.
"Modaceous candidas," Snape chanted and then dropped his wand and the shower halted. He stood still, head bent, the only light available came from the moon rising behind the castle.
"What...what did you do?" Harry asked, angrily.
Voldemort held it before him. "It seems that Mrs. Potter was in love with you Severus. She says that even though she said goodbye to you she wanted to stay, wanted you to ask her to stay with you." The wizard laughed. "Why Severus you never told me about this? How you must have hated me for killing her."
The Double stood dumbly in front of the wizard without speaking. He was functioning as a conduit and yet he was reacting as if he were real. The two Snape's apart and yet together looked at the paper Voldemort held in his hands and wished with all theirs hearts that they could reach out and wrench it from his filthy hands.
Voldemort, unaware of the reaction, kept reading. "Oh my!" He burst out with laughter and derision. "Why the little half-blood muggle was pregnant with your child, Severus."
On the stairs to the castle Snape's head came up. He looked out over the head of Potter and his friends and he stared at the cottage in the distance. His chest was heaving and he could not find the strength to pull his mind away from the scene in the room.
Voldemort finished the letter and cocked his head as if it would help him think through things more easily. Granted he was becoming ever more reptilian as time went on and most of the humanity that was left was utilized to function as a wizard and human. But his brain was struggling with the epiphany. "Why Severus, it was Harry Potter. It was her son...and yours. Not Potter's." His voice was soft with wonderment.
Harry closed his eyes and reached out with his mind. He had to know what was happening and this was as good as time as any to try their experiment. Besides, he told himself, it was all going to ruin anyway. Their plans were now up in the air.
He was surprised at how easy it was this time. Faster than it took to apparate he was in the room at the cottage and at the same time inside the skull of Voldemort. He was immediately aware that the wizard did not know he was present. There was a clarity this time that was not present when he had attempted to access the dark wizard's mind before. This time Harry realized that the wizard's thoughts were so alien that Harry was functioning as if he were a separate entity inside the man's head. It was if he were a bystander watching a scene play out before him. This will work, Harry thought. I can trick him into going to the castle. I can show him the Horcurxes and then get out of his head.
And then he heard what Voldemort was saying. He looked down with the Dark wizard's eyes and read the paper he held in his hand. He recognized the writing. It was in hi s mother's hand.
Dear Severus,
I left you awhile ago. I could not do what I have to do tomorrow and marry James Potter without being honest with you. What has happened changes nothing. I will still marry him because I know he will be a good husband and will care for our child.
Yes, I am pregnant with your child. I hope to tell you this someday. I know I shall not send this letter to you until the time is right. By then I hope that you will understand why I am doing this. I truly did not want to keep it from you. And then tonight you said that you loved me. Why, oh why has it taken this long for you to say the words I have longed to hear?
Time has not erased the sorrow I feel, dear man, but I think now that you have confessed your feelings, I think I can forgive you. When you find out about this I hope that in turn you can do the same for me. I could not tell you and risk letting our son live in the shadow of that evil wizard, Voldemort. I only hope that you can find the strength to pull away from him before it's too late.
Why couldn't you ask me to stay? I might have.
With all my heart,
Lily.