Author's Notes: Today's alternate scenario involves no sex.

Instead, for those Robin fan-girls that read this story (By the way, I got nothing against him. He's just fun to annoy :P) Robin manages to get into the evil lair and begins his epic battle to save Starfire!

Will he succeed?

Read on to find out.

Brotherhood of Evil's Lair

"Attention. My comrades." The Brain declared, his synthetic voice echoing around the hall, where all the gathered villains awaited this latest speech. "I am pleased. To say. That we have. Successfully. Captured one. Of the Teen Titans."

The villains all cheered at the prospect of one of the core Titans in their grasp.

But the question was-

"WHICH ONE?"

"Villains. Of the Brotherhood. Of Evil." The Brain drawled, Mallah, Rouge and Immortus standing by the jar-thing, as a wall behind the quartet opened, revealing a cell. "I present. Our captive."

Within this cell, tied up, gagged, helpless, was none other then the Titan, Starfire.

The alien was struggling pitifully against her bonds, mighty ropes designed to restrain her limbs in such her strength couldn't be used. Her arms were tied behind her back, the arms also tied to her torso. Her legs were also tied together by the ankles and the thighs, the rope joined both to each other and the rope around her arms, which all joined at a diamond-shape just below her chest, the bottom of this diamond from the ropes around her legs, which actually stretched in between her thighs, the sides of the diamond from the arm bonds and the top from two threads from her shoulders, in between her breasts.

Best of all, there was a ball gag in her mouth, the black strap wrapped round the lower part of her head.

In short, every villain with a Y chromosome just had their dreams come true.

The exotic, beautiful, sexy Starfire, in such a kinkily trapped position, her emerald eyes shining with fear, completely helpless.

The uproar was absolutely tremendous, all the males practically jumping for joy, shrieking with delight, the females looking very annoyed with their comrades antics.

Control Freak was struggling to plug up a monstrous nosebleed, Red X was cheering like no other, the males of the Hive Five were high-fiving each other in triumph, Dr Light was drooling, Plasmus, Cinderblock and Overload discussing with each other cheerfully, Ding Dong Daddy was going "YEE-HA!"

In short, every male was thrilled.

Oh, greatest joys!

"Methinks zat ze villains are pleased." Mallah stated, the other two nodding in agreement, as the Brain watched this in amusement, before turning to face the whimpering alien.

"You see. Starfire. Your fate. Lies in our hands. We may do to you. Whatever. We please."

Starfire whimpered again, as the male villains started shouting:

Control Freak: "OMG! I gotta get a picture of this!"

Johnny Rancid: "Sick! This is totally awesome!"

Mammoth: "This is the best day of my life!"

Red X: "I love the Brotherhood!"

Punk Rocker: "SWEET!"

Billy Numerous: "This be the greatest thing ever!"

Hell, even Overload: "I will shock her world!"

Rouge snorted in disgust. "Filthy males. I vould think sat zat ze girl deserves better zen zis pathetic bunch."

Starfire nodded in panicked agreement.

One of the villains, Punk Rocker heard this and instantly shouted in retaliation: "Shut up, Frenchie! That girl needs a real man like me!"

Rouge punched him unconscious: "Uncouth bastard."

The other villains, the female ones, were also shouting, though this was in anger at such disregard to a member of their gender:

"Shut up, you perverts! You all make me sick!"

"Geez, no wonder she fights you lot!"

"Dumb-asses!"

The males were about to retort, when the Brain interrupted all of them:

"Fools. She is merely. Bait. For the other Titans."

Every male groaned in unhappiness.

Control Freak: "C'mon! At least let me take her on a date or something!"

Red X: "A babe like that needs a real man! Like me!"

See-More: "At least lemme use my X-ray vision!"

Everyone else: "X-RAY VISION? GIVE IT HERE!"

The villains were instantly upon See-More, trying to get his helmet. The Cyclops was only saved by Kyd Wykkyd teleporting him to safety.

However, as the Brotherhood watched the villains fight, a massive explosion suddenly smashed through the nearby door.

Everyone looked at it in shock, as the smoke cleared to reveal-

ROBIN!

"Well. It appears. That the King. Has arrived. To rescue. His Queen." The Brain sneered, as every villain took on evil glares, each one eager to beat Robin's ass.

"Give Starfire back right now!" Robin snarled, raising his bo staff in one hand and a load of explosives in the other.

"Who is going. To make us?" Brain sneered.

"I am!"

"Just you, against all of them?" Rogue asked. "Even I think zat is overkill."

"The questions is-" Immortus said. "-How did you find our lair?"

Robin held up a pink pair of pants. "I followed her panty scent."

Each villain looked rather disturbed at this.

Suddenly, Starfire let out a muffled scream of pure rage, the kind of rage that would make big strong men cry like babies, and actually snapped every binding rope off her with nothing more then feminine power.

Tearing the ball gag out of her mouth, Starfire screamed:

"THOSE ARE MY SPECIAL PANTS! WHERE DID YOU GET THEM?"

Robin gulped. "Er... I... needed them... for research?"

Starfire smashed through the cage like it was nothing and lunged for the nearest target in her rage- The Brain.

"Monsieur Mallah. Save me." The Brain said, just Starfire grabbed him and beat the shit out of him.

"Screw that! I'm getting out of here!" Mallah replied, before running away, Rogue and Immortus quickly following him.

Finished with owning the Brain, the pissed off alien jumped into the throng of villains-

It was absolute carnage. They didn't stand a single f***ing chance. Robin just about wet himself as he watched the one-woman massacre in front of him. Red X had his legs snapped in places that Robin didn't know existed. Malchior had been beaten to the ground by Cardiac, whom had been used as a blunt weapon. The Hive Five were currently knotted together in a painful pile. Warp was beaten with his own helmet. Cinderblock was in pieces, while Overload had been shorted out just by the raging alien spitting on him. Plasmus was currently stuffed down Control Freak's throat, Adonis had been torn apart (His armour, at least) and Atlas had been used to smash Katarou into the ground. The female villains had long since escaped, except for Kitten-

What Starfire did to Kitten was so horrifying, so disturbing, so bloody, Robin threw up.

Finally, when every villain was pulp, Starfire turned her anger onto Robin. Stalking towards the cowering Boy Wonder, she shrieked:

"YOU! YOU HAD THE NERVE TO STEAL MY MOST FAVOURITE OF PANTS! FOR NO OTHER PURPOSE OTHER THEN TO SATISFY YOUR SICK MALE DESIRES! WELL, I HAVE NEWS FOR YOU, ROBIN!-"

Starfire swept into a hug, beaming her massive smile:

"Thank you for attempting to rescue me! It was most heroic and kind!"

Robin mentally sighed in relief. I mean, seriously. He was RELIEVED. She wasn't going to murder him like she did those poor villains. Hell, that psychic guy had used as a dodge-ball!

What Robin didn't really expect, however, was when Starfire purred:

"On my planet, such a heroic attempt to rescue means that the rescuer has a strong desire for mating. And I feel most aroused after my attack. Shall we?"

And Robin, right there in the Brotherhood of Evil's secret lair, got the best reward anyone could ever give!

Gotham City

"HOLY CRAP!" Batman shouted.

"What is it, sir?" Alfred asked.

"I never thought it possible-" Batman replied. "-But Dick actually got to use his namesake! On a girl!"

"Amazing, sir."

Author's Notes: Now you know why Robin left. Because Batman kept making fun of the fact he was too much of a tight-ass to score a chick.

Well, in your face, Batman! XD

Seriously though, don't ever steal Starfire's favourite panties. You could be a monstrous deity, but she'd rip you apart for it. So, never steal her pants. Or you will die.

Don't you just love Starfire? :D