A/N: Thanks to Lily is me for this wonderful idea!
Neville Longbottom
"Longbottom, Neville!"
The Hat cast his memory back. Longbottom, Longbottom...ah, yes, Frank. Smart, studious young man. Serious as could be, yet confident also. Good at almost everything. A pleasure to Sort! The Hat peered eagerly through the students, certain this boy would be a mirror image of his perfect father.
He was terribly disappointed.
A boy with a hat askew and untidy hair spewing out of it was walking—well, a more appropriate word would be "stumbling"--up the hall, clutching a toad with both hands, looking more apprehensive than all of children in the hall together, including the Weasley, and how the Granger had looked, and the Potter too.
G-g-g-g-g-g-g-good evening, h-h-hat.
Who told you to say that?
N-n-n-no one. I thought it would be p-polite.
Right, and who told you to say that?
Er, my gran.
I see. Well, I suppose this is an open and shut case. "H.."
NO! NO! PLEASE, QUIET!
All right. What house do you think you should be in?
Wait, you're actually listening to me?
Look, I don't have a choice. This ain't going to be an easy day, I already see a Weasley and Potter. So can we try to make this fast?
Uh, uh, I'll try. Well..I'd like to be in Ravenclaw, cos that's where the smarties go..
That's where your gran wants you to go, you mean. Where do you want to go?
Not..not Slytherin. Ravenclaw won't be bad. But..Gryffindor sounds wonderful, it really really does. But..I don't know.
I hate doing this, but I'm to resort to psychological methods. Right. I'll say a word, and just let whatever come into your head. Ready?
Er, I think so!
Red.
Pride.
Blue.
Gran will be pleased.
Badger.
No.
Lion.
Brave.
Gran.
Commanding, wonderful.
Smart.
Unrealistic.
Brave.
Mum and Dad.
Cruel.
Cruciatus Curse.
Evil.
Bellatrix Lestrange.
Wait a moment, how in the world do you know—
She..she tortured my parents into madness when I was just a baby.
And you've lived with your gran ever since?
Yes.
And you've survived the thought that your parents don't know who you are?
I have to.
That's bravery if I've ever seen it.
"GRYFFINDOR!"