Chapter 4

"Pregnant," Lily said in a voice barely above a whisper. She half-heartedly folded the test results and handed them to Paige.

The clinic doctor looked from Lily to Paige. "I'll leave you two alone," she said quietly leaving the cubicle. Paige looked over the test results for a moment and walked over to Lily.

"Hey," she whispered, "why don't we get out of here, huh? I think you need some time to yourself to think about this." All Lily could do was nod; somehow, she just felt emotionally tapped out. There were so many questions that were unanswered: one was how could she break this news to Granger and her parents? She silently let Paige help her off the table and out of the cubicle.

"A baby…there's a baby growing inside of me," Lily thought as she and Paige started driving away from the clinic; the damn clinic. It seemed like a portion of Hell now that it gave her the scariest news of her life. Neither of them spoke throughout the ride home until Paige pulled into the driveway.

"Do you want me to stay with you until your father gets home?" Paige asked gently.

"Oh, no—I mean, thank you, but I just need to stay by myself right now." Lily grabbed her bag and started to climb out of the car, her hand never leaving her stomach, where it was rested for the duration of the ride home. "Paige, thank you so much for bringing me to the clinic, but can I ask you for one more favor?"

"What's that, sweetie?"

"Can you not tell anyone about this? Nobody else can know about me being pregnant yet."

Paige took Lily's hand and stared straight into her soft hazel eyes. "I'm not going to tell a soul. Lily, I want you to know that whatever you decide to do is your choice, okay? Nobody can tell you what to do from here."

"Thanks…I know." She shut the door of the car and walked slowly up the steps to La Boulaie as Paige pulled away. As she slowly tiptoed into the living room and climbed gently onto the sofa, she realized that she felt so heavy; probably it was her psyche reminding her that she had a baby growing inside of her. She slowly reclined back on the couch and hugged her knees to her chest. What was she going to do now?

She laid like that for what seemed like forever. Her eyes felt heavy, but she felt like she could not sleep. How could she? She had so much on her mind that she would be surprised if she could ever think again. Still, she did feel tired. Maybe a small nap would not hurt…

Bang!

"Lily! Are you here?"

"Oh…" Lily groaned. She slowly sat up and rubbed her eyes. "Yeah, I'm in here!" she called.

She watched as her cousin, Starr Manning, and her friend Langston Wilde emerge from the kitchen. "We thought we'd see you here," Starr beamed strolling into the living room and sitting down on the chair across from Lily. "What are you doing?"

"Well, I, uh—nothing."

"Well, are you doing anything tonight?" Langston prompted sitting on one of the arms of the couch.

"Not particularly. Why?"

"Gabe is throwing this awesome party at his house…sort of like an end of the summer bash before high school takes over," Starr explained. "I'm sure Granger told you about it."

"No…I haven't talked to Granger since yesterday."

"Oh. Well, do you want to go?" Lily looked from Starr to Langston; both of them were looking back at her expectantly. No, of course she did not want to go to some stupid party. Why would she want to when she found out she was preg—no, she would not say it. She would not even think of it.

"Umm, I don't know, you guys. You know, after what happened last time I went to a party—"

"Oh, come on, it will be fun," Langston interrupted dismissively, "and we'll promise to keep you away from the booze this time."

"That's not what I was worried about," Lily muttered quietly.

"Have you two seen Lily?" Granger asked Starr and Cole. It was nearly midnight, and he had not seen Lily around the party for about an hour.

"No. She said she was looking for you," Starr replied.

"I wonder where she could—"

"Cannonball!" a loud but familiar voice shouted.

"…be," Granger finished. He, Starr, and Cole turned to the door to see Lily stumble into the room, pushing herself amongst the crowd that was dancing wildly.

"Oh, I looooove this song!" she slurred, her eyes rolling around in her sockets. Suddenly, she started looking around the room. "Granger! Granger! Where are you? Come dance with me!" She looked around to see everyone around her staring at her. "What? I'm just looking for my man. Granger, I need you!"

"I'm right here, Babe!" Granger rushed through the people and put his arms around Lily, who looked as if she were about to fall over. "What happened to you?"

"Why the hell would you say something like that? I'm fine, I'm—damn, it's a wonder what a beer can do to you! I've never felt so alive!"

"Oh, so you've been drinking?"

"Just a half a—hic—bottle." Suddenly, her expression turned vague and distant. "You know what? I don't feel so alive anymore. I feel—"And with that, she passed out right in Granger's arms.

"You know, you were so funny when you were drunk," Starr remembered.

"It's not that!" Lily repeated. "I just—tonight I'm going back to Viki's to stay with my mom…uh, not that she'd even be home, but I don't want to explain to Viki why I am sneaking into my room through my window at three o'clock in the morning."

"Oh come on. Aunt Viki and Clint Buchanan are back together; she probably won't even notice that you're gone."

"No."

"A few hours."

"No."

"Two hours."

"No."

"One hour."

"If I go for an hour, would you quit bugging me?"

"Yes!" Starr and Langston earnestly replied at the same time. Lily sighed; she did not know why she was saying yes, but she was too tired to keep fighting with Starr and Langston. Who knows? Maybe an hour away from all of this craziness would help her out in the long run.

"Fine. I'll go, but just for an hour. Then, I am going home."

"Man, since when did you become so uptight?" Langston observed raising her eyebrow.

Lily rolled her eyes. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"What I mean is that you and Granger are always the ones going to parties. You would call us at midnight telling us to get over to whoever is throwing the latest bash. Now we're practically begging you to come."

"There's only one explanation for this," Starr added tapping her chin. She eyed her cousin from head to toe and smiled knowingly but sympathetically. "Is everything okay with you and Granger?"

"And here's the question of the day," Lily thought to herself leaning back against the couch. Things were a little strained over the past few days, but that was because Granger was remembering the painful loss of his best friend. Everything will be fine…until she told him about the baby. "Of course everything is okay," she snapped impatiently. "Everything is more than okay. In fact, I'll call Granger right now."

Granger looked around Rodi's finding something to keep him occupied. He had been shooting pool and darts for hours, and if he ordered another bacon cheeseburger, he would gain a thousand pounds. Yet, he did not want to leave for some reason. Rodi's was his place for thinking, and no way was he finished thinking.

A sudden vibrating noise pulled him out of his thoughts. He absent-mindedly pulled his phone out of his pocket and answered it before checking who it was. "Hello?"

"Granger? It's me."

"Lily." A pit the size of a basketball formed in his stomach. "Hey? What's up?"

"Are you okay?" Lily's voice seemed to be trembling as she spoke. "I have been calling and texting you a million times, but you wouldn't answer."

"Sorry, Babe, I was just thinking."

"About George?"

"Umm…yeah."

The thing Granger hated most in the world was awkward silences, but this silence was deafening. "Babe…why is your voice shaking?"

"Oh, umm…I'm not feeling well."

"I know. Jade told me."

"Uh, Granger? Starr and Langston wanted to know if we were going to that party at Gabe's house." Granger noticed how she seemed desperate to make conversation.

Did he want to go to the party? If he and Lily went, then that would mean that Farah was there, and he really did not want to spend the whole time glancing at Farah uneasily worrying that Lily would find out that they kissed.

"You don't have to go," Lily continued quickly. "I was just going for an hour or so and then going home."

"N-no, it's fine," Granger interrupted abruptly. "Uh, I'll pick you up…later. See ya."

"Doesn't anyone say good-bye anymore?" Lily groaned closing her phone and flopping back on the couch. She was oblivious that Starr and Langston were still in the room until she opened her eyes and saw them standing over her with expectant expressions on their faces. "You two wouldn't happen to want anything while you're standing over me gawking like idiots, would you?" she snapped making the two girls jump away from her.

"Are you okay?" Starr asked cautiously taking a wary step forward.

"Yes, I'm fine." Lily slowly climbed off of the couch. "Granger and I will be at the party, stay there for an hour, and go home. Now, if you don't mind, I'm going to take a nap upstairs. Alone." With that, she ran up to her room and slammed the door. Starr could have sworn that the whole mansion quivered.

Although it had taken Lily about an hour to fall back asleep, she had rested peacefully for a long time. She had no ongoing nightmare, at least, about telling Granger or her family about the baby. She just seemed to be in a thoughtless daze of nothingness until she was woken up abruptly by her vibrating phone.

"Effin' phone!" she groaned rubbing her eyes and groping around her bedside table for the cell phone. Finally she reached it and through blurry vision, she read the text message, "Busy. Meet me at the party instead?"

"Fine," she answered aloud, as if the text message could talk. Granger was avoiding her again; what a surprise.

She slowly climbed out of bed, her body sore from lack of stretching. Why was she even going out of her way to go to a party for an hour when her boyfriend did not even want to go? If only they could go somewhere quieter and more peaceful, like Asa's yacht. As they were riding out into the moonlight, she would take his hand and tell him the news; the life changing news that they were going to be parents.

And how would he respond? Honestly, Lily did not know if it was going to positive or negative. In a perfect world, of course, Granger would take her by the shoulders and whisper soothingly in her ear that everything was going to be okay and that they would figure everything out together; but the way that he has been acting lately, Lily almost knew that would not be the case.

"I don't know what to do!" she yelled in a hoarse voice throwing her phone as hard as she could across the room. She watched it break in half as it hit the wall and fall to the ground. What would Granger want her to do?

"Babe, you were kidding when you were saying all that baby talk last night, weren't you?"

It was the next morning, and Lily had just gotten out of the shower; she had not felt this great in a long time.

"Of course I was. You don't think that one night of sex would want me to start popping out babies, did you?" Lily giggled as she pulled her long, wet blonde hair into a ponytail. "No. I'm too crazy about you to start even thinking about kids. I don't even know if I want kids."

"I don't know either," Granger agreed. He was still reclining in the bed reading that morning's issue of The Sun. "But a little baby with your genes wouldn't be so bad."

"A little baby with your genes wouldn't be so bad, either."

Suddenly, Lily got a sense of clarity. Who would care if she told Granger at a party where probably half the people would be drunk? The fact was that she had to tell her boyfriend that she was having his baby right away, and if the background noise was going to be a little too loud for her taste, then so be it. Not even bothering to get changed into more appropriate attire for a party, she grabbed her car keys and purse and rushed out the door.

Ding-dong!

"Granger, glad you could make it!" Gabe, the host of the party, high-fived Granger and stepped aside to let him inside. "Where's Lily?"

"She'll be here soon…I think," Granger mumbled observing the loud music and wild dancing. He already knew that the beer keg was in the back yard. Usually, he and Lily were the first ones on the dance floor. They were always the life of the party. Shaking his head, he ventured into the house to find something to occupy him until his girlfriend arrived and things got more awkward.

"Granger!" Granger spun around to see Farah hurrying toward him.

"Farah, hey. I, uh, didn't know you would be here."

"Likewise," Farah shrugged, "but now that you're here, I would think that Lily would be here too, unless…" She clapped her hand over her mouth in horror. "Oh my god, she found out, didn't she? Oh my god, I have to go explain to her—"

"Farah." Granger clapped his hand on Farah's shoulder. "No, she doesn't know. She's meeting me here, that's all."

"Oh." Farah exhaled with relief. "Okay, well…I'll see you around, then."

"Wait. We still need to talk about what happened."

"I thought we already did, and frankly, I don't know if I can handle more." She tried to walk away, but Granger stopped her.

"I still have something that needs to be said, and I need to say it now. Come on; let's go somewhere where no one is around." He led Farah across the room until they found a closed door. "Is anyone in there?" He knocked firmly, but no one answered. "Come on." He opened the door and looked around. It was not just a room; it was a bedroom. "If this is too awkward—"

"No, it's fine," Farah interrupted stiffly. "This is the only empty room where we can talk, so this is fine." She sat down warily on the bed and looked up at Granger. "So, what do you want to tell me?"

"That day when we…you know, kissed," Granger started. "I thought it was an accident and just a huge mistake; I loved Lily and still do, but…" He walked over to Farah and took her hand. "I'm finding out that I'm getting feelings for you."

"Damn his touch!" Farah thought. She shivered; how could the warmth of his hand make her whole body tingle like that? Should she tell him that the feelings were mutual? How could she lie to him if she denied it? Still, Lily was her best friend—

"I'm getting feelings for you too," she blurted out. She covered her mouth in astonishment; so much for loyalty to her best friend. Still, once those fateful words had come out of her mouth, she kept talking. "That kiss wasn't just a comfort kiss. I have been over George for a long time. I have actually had a crush on you for months, and celebrating George's birthday was just a way to get us alone." There, she said it. Those burning words had finally left her mouth. Did she dare look back up at Granger? "Granger, I'm—"

"Don't talk," Granger demanded, pushing her back onto the bed. "Please, just don't talk." It time to do what they have been longing to do for a long time, and no one could hold them back; not even Lily.

Knock knock!

"Lily!" Gabe greeted. "Finally, you're here. It's kind of scary seeing Granger alone—"

"Yeah, yeah, where is he?" Lily interrupted pushing past the host. Not waiting for an answer (or caring for that matter), she looked frantically around the house. It would take forever to find him with this mob crowding the house!

"I know where Granger is!" a high, playful voice crooned from behind. Lily turned around to see Sandy standing behind her.

"I thought I'd see the last of you when we banished you from our lives," Lily snapped coldly to her ex-friend. "Unfortunately, I was wrong. Get out of the way, I have to find Granger!" She pushed the blonde girl out of the way to go into the backyard, but Sandy just followed her.

"You won't find him back there!" Sandy called to Lily. "Sadly, Granger's behavior wasn't driven by beer although it would be quite funny all the same."

"Would you just shut up, you slut?" Lily shrieked, using everything in her to stop herself from lunging onto Sandy. "I need to find Granger!"

"He's in there, if you really want to know." Sandy pointed slyly to the closed door that was nearby them. "But I wouldn't go in there if I were you. You might walk in on something you don't want to see."

"Right, I'll humor you." Lily strode over to the door. "I really don't want to walk in on him gelling his hair again. With that, she opened threw open the door. "You s—"

What she saw was definitely something she did not want to see; far worse than Granger gelling his hair. "Oh my god!" she gasped clutching her heart; it felt as if it were going to burst. "Oh my god!" With that, everything just went black.