So, this is effing awesome. Thank you for supporting my story. : )
Your reviews make me want to throw up on Edward's shoes. In a good way, I promise.
So, by request from LeydyLaura, this is our first EPOV chapter. Enjoy!
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. I do however, own bewildered Edward.
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I really don't understand it. At all.
I mean, I'm not conceited, I'm just a realist. I'm an attractive man.
At least last time I checked.
And this woman, this- this angry self-esteem bashing beast- just loathes the sight of me.
I'm befuddled.
All I did was tell her she smelled disgusting. She did. I wasn't lying.
I mean, she did smell nasty! Come on!
Perhaps I shouldn't have been so blunt.
But that's besides the point. She just shot insult after insult at me, with no signs of mercy.
And this was within the first ten minutes I knew her.
And she thought I was gay!
Absurd! Ridiculous!
Where would she even come up with that?
Perhaps I could tone down the designer labels…
But besides that, there was another problem.
I was ridiculously attracted to her.
She spent most of her time either glowering or insulting me, and I couldn't hold down my erection when I was within ten feet of her.
This was beyond a dilemma.
It was just…so many things. She wasn't intimidated by me. She held her own. She was obviously witty and intelligent, and she hated me.
And I loved it.
God, I was sick. I must be a glutton for abuse.
Mmm…perhaps Bella with a whip….
No! Edward, stop that! She'd probably use it to beat you like a slave master!
But would that be such a bad thing?
Well fuck me. I might be a sado-masochist.
And I mean, at first the only thing that helped was imagining her in some sort of ugly, granny panties underwear set with a full bush underneath her clothes. That was the image I used the entire car ride home to keep me from pushing her face into my lap.
And then of course I had to walk in on that. Which completely ruined my tactics.
Because that picture would forever be burned in my head.
Those shiny little panties…
Combine knowing what was under those clothes with that dirty little mouth.
She was provocation on legs.
That dirty mouth drove me crazy. Even when she was throwing vulgar jabs about my sexuality at me It was all I could do to keep talking and not drag her up to my room and just bend her over.
I had always been the romantic, sensitive guy.
But something told me Bella didn't really like that. Something told me she was the "stolen grope in the dark" type.
I could do that.
I think perhaps part of the reason I wanted her so bad is because she didn't want me. At all. I could see it in her eyes.
And the 'hard to get' ones were just the best.
I had women falling over me. Just begging to get in my pants. But they were so… wannabe innocent. So desperate. And they didn't eat.
Bella was everything but innocent. She was a pretty genuine bad girl.
She knew exactly what she was talking about with the tangerine- walnut- salad.
But she was so different. She wasn't a lady. She knew me up and down the second she saw me. She knew how I thought.
And she threw up on my shoes.
It pissed me off. I mean, at least I wasn't wearing the Italian leather…
Tone down the gay, Edward.
Anyway, the bitch threw up on my shoes! And while a part of me was totally disgusted and pissed off,
Another party was hopeful.
There was absolutely no way she could hate me anymore.
I mean, she threw up on me.
She had to feel at least a tiny bit bad.
She threw up on me after she rudely turned down my offer to take her shopping with sarcasm.
So there had to be some humanity in her.
Right?
Right?
Which had me even more surprised when the next morning, she still despised me. And that irked me. A lot.
How is it possible to still be a sarcastic ass hole to someone after you throw up on them?
I mean, there had to be some law of ethics or something. Some morality concept!
I even told her that she did it, in case she didn't know. But she did know. Who was I kidding? Alice would never give up the opportunity to tell her.
So that made me hate her a little bit too. Probably not as much as she despised me, but at least I had some emotional ammo for arguments now.
I was still attracted to her, and I knew me and my hand were going to be hanging out quite a lot, but at least I could return some of the feeling she had for me.
I mean, what a cold hearted bitch. Like, really.
Cold.
And then she had to thank me all timidly for the pizza. What the fuck?
What was wrong with this woman? Was she bipolar?
Maybe she really did snort coke!
The woman was infuriating! I couldn't understand her. And I had the intense desire to do so.
And to do her.
Shit.
I need to take my meds.
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So, there you have it. Your first EPOV chapter.
I know, I know.
Meds?
For what?
All in due time kiddies.
: )
Reviewww!!!