Warning: A mature scene is hinted at near the end of the chapter. Please read at your own discretion. It is not meant to be offensive in any way.
Disclaimer: I do not own Rumiko Takahashi's InuYasha.
Chapter 10 – Longing
Kikyou found herself passing by numerous stores on the street, but not going inside. If Kagura was here, she'd probably suggest shopping as a means to get over depression. After all, what can be better therapy than splurging on the latest shoes, styles, magazines and undergarments?
She mentally sighed, resigning herself to a shopping spree upon opening the door to a random store on the street. She wandered around aimlessly, looking but not taking in what she was seeing. It wasn't until she heard someone play with a rattle that she realized that she had wandered into a Gap store for babies.
She stared at the tiny pink shoe that she was holding onto, an unfamiliar feeling washing over her. Despite the turmoil she felt at catching Inuyasha in the act, she felt an inexplicable sense of… happiness. Like she was in the dark her whole life and suddenly, someone had just given her a lit candle.
She quickly placed the shoe back onto the shelf, not sitting well with the new blossoming feeling in her. She has yet to tell Inuyasha that he was going to be a dad, following the treatment that Dr. Sui had ordered. Quite frankly, after what she had witnessed today, he'd be lucky if she chose to talk to him at all.
A feeling of warmth washed over her upon the thought of her new baby. If anyone had told her that she'd be the one responsible for breaking up Inuyasha and his fiancée, she would've told them that it was inevitable. But if anyone had told her that she'd be carrying his child… well, that person probably wouldn't be alive to tell anyone else.
She never thought of herself as a motherly figure, and after seeing so many birthing scenes at the hospital, she found herself feeling a shred of fear at going through what those new mothers had to go through. To say that it is a painful experience… Probably an understatement worthy of the Guiness Book of World Records.
But for some reason, Kikyou found herself considering Naraku's offer. Perhaps she was tired of jumping from partner to partner, or maybe she just wanted to lead a normal life where she didn't need to plot against other people to sleep with the guy of the month. Most likely though, it was at Naraku's tempting offer at erasing all of the debt that she owed him.
If there was one thing that Kikyou hated, it was being indebted to him. It was probably more dangerous as living in a tank with a hungry shark. You never knew when he would call asking for favours, or even what those are. But one thing is for sure – it was bound to be something that people with a conscience will never sit well with.
She stared at the cloudy sky, dreading the day when her child sees the world for the first time, while at the same time hoping for the day that she would be free from Naraku's chains forever.
Naraku sneezed in the safety of his alcove. He hadn't thought his abode was particularly dusty… Perhaps he should take Kanna up on her offer of cleaning his place after all. If she remembered, that is.
He sighed in content. The sky was gray, his favourite colour. It seemed like a fairly depressing day, which made Naraku's day that much better. He reveled in sadness and grief. Some would say that he was sadistic, but according to him, that made him realistic. After all, reality is the shattering of hopes. Why not embrace the inevitable sorrow that follows? To him, people who hope are like ants waiting to be crushed. They work hard for hopes of a better future, and then they get stepped on by some random person walking down the street who don't pay attention to what they step on, their hopes never to be realized.
He settled on the armchair in his study, where he overlooked his corporation's projects, as well as 'spied' on his subjects of questionable loyalty. He pulled up the screen that overlooked Kanna, who served as a daily reminder of his failure and of the dreams that he was waiting to crush.
After watching Kanna stare motionlessly at a wall for a few minutes, he pulled up a screen to follow Inuyasha's movements. He had Kagura plant a few cameras in his office, and though Inuyasha provided much entertainment, Naraku had been frustrated to pieces at what little value it was for him to learn of Inuyasha's corporation.
Right now, his office is empty and dark. Naraku, feeling a bit of his good humour slipping away, turned to the information that Kouga had sent. He had ordered Kouga to track down and ultimately, capture, the target in question and so far, all he had to show for it was a couple of videos of the target leaving school, heading home and talking to friends. Since this wasn't very urgent, Naraku thought against pressuring Kouga. After all, there was only so much pressure one could take before a bone or a soul breaks.
He stared out of the window in his study, a view that billionaires would pay millions for. It overlooked the entire city. Though he knew that he was being a hypocrite, he couldn't help but be excited for the successful completion of his impending plan. Then he would show her what she had missed by choosing that guy over him.
Kagome grumbled incoherently as she followed Sesshoumaru into his office. She was feeling the last of her sanity slip away as the people in the building unknowingly walk through her to get to their destinations. It was a wonder that she could still keep a corporal form, what with all the pain that she had experienced when those people passed through her.
"Ouch," She commented absentmindedly when Sesshoumaru's secretary walked through her to follow Sesshoumaru into his office. She was holding onto a particularly sharp looking fountain pen and wielding it like a sword.
"Just finish what I gave you this morning," Sesshoumaru commented offhandedly, stopping at his chair only to place his jacket on it before strolling towards the elevators to his laboratories.
"But I did, Taishou-sama!" His secretary mumbled nervously, not quite knowing if that was the right thing to say.
"Then go home," He spoke frigidly. The secretary gasped in a combination of shock and horror. His boss was giving her the rest of the day off? Well, it was nearly four in the afternoon and she was supposed to get off work at five but…
"But… you NEVER let me leave early. You always give me extra stuff to do and make me work overtime…" The secretary babbled in her fright. Her world has just turned upside down. Her boss just did something that she had only imagined in her dreams. He had let her GET OFF WORK EARLY. Sesshoumaru gave her a cold glare.
"Would you like to stay overtime?" He asked dangerously, eyes flashing in unexplicable emotion. The secretary gulped nervously. Kagome was stifling a laugh from her position behind the secretary.
"Come Kagome," Sesshoumaru finally said as the elevator doors opened. Kagome treaded carefully around the secretary, not wanting to bear the pain of passing through another person. The secretary looked really confused. She gave the secretary a pitying glance whilst walking around her. A glance of course, that she couldn't see.
The secretary felt her knees shake at the close brush with death that she had just encountered. Her boss had just let her off work an hour early… and talked to a non-existent person… Her mind tried to connect the dots.
Perhaps… her boss was finally going insane from the work? Or perhaps…
She gasped again. That MUST be it! He must be high on an experimental drug that his scientists were labouring over! She silently congratulated the one that had ingeniously thought of creating a pill to make her boss less like a slave driver. Then, she mentally wrote a note to herself to pick up said pills and slip them in a certain overbearing demon lord's coffee every morning.
The elevator ride to the labs was silent. Sesshoumaru was enjoying the rare moment of quiet when a certain soul decided to disrupt it with a comment.
"I didn't know that you had a soft spot for hardworking secretaries," Kagome mused out loud. Sesshoumaru's eyebrow twitched.
"I do not. I simply do not wish for her blood and innards to soil my immaculate room," He said plainly, as though they were discussing the weather outside.
"Yes indeed, it is really dreary outside. Kind of humid too actually," Kagome quipped, causing an eyebrow raise from him.
"I was about to ask you if it bothered you at all that you discuss killing people as though it were part of a normal conversation, but then I realized that I'd be stupid to do so. Obviously it doesn't bother you, otherwise you wouldn't have said it in such a nonchalant tone in the first place," Kagome thought aloud. Sesshoumaru just stared at her openly.
"Do you like the sound of your voice?" Sesshoumaru quietly asked.
Kagome didn't look at him as she showed him her thoughtful pose. "It's not so much that I like the sound of it… I just like having conversations with people, even if it is some imaginary person in my head, if only to alleviate the boredom…"
"You speak nonsense," He said emotionlessly.
"Yeah, well you are the cause of the increasing death rates in the country," Kagome said crossily. Sesshoumaru raised an eyebrow.
"Why would that be?" He remarked.
"Cause when girls in your fan club find out that they can't have you, the truth kills them. Well, mentally at least." Kagome shuddered, having encountered one such fanatic herself. She had seemed normal from her appearance, but at any mention of Sesshoumaru… it was as though she had turned into a completely insane person.
"Is that so?" He asked, eyebrow still raised. Kagome tried not to gawk as a look of curiosity adorned his Adonis-like face.
"Yeah, every time you do or say something that seems normal by people standards, you can bet there are fangirls out there screaming and yelling in fandom," She replied, still caught up in the memory of being unfortunately trampled by one such crowd. It had been traumatizing to say the least. She now has learned better than to go to a mall on Sesshoumaru's birthday. The bruises didn't heal for a month.
"And yet… why are you not?" He asked sagely, leaning in closer to garner her full attention. Kagome stared into his eyes.
"Because I'm not a person, stupid," She said, sticking a hand through his face. "I'm a soul, remember?"
Sesshoumaru suddenly had a strong urge to hold onto her wrist and retract her offensive appendage from his face. He fought it viciously, calming his anger until he was able to speak in his normal voice.
"Please retract your arm from this Sesshoumaru's face." He spoke stoically. Kagome grinned as she complied, albeit reluctantly.
Just then, Sesshoumaru was spared the need to thank her. The elevator doors opened to a concrete hallway with many fire-safe doors adorning the sides of it. Kagome followed Sesshoumaru to the doorway that was marked '3', along with a bunch of other symbols beside it.
"So, what's behind the door?" Kagome asked curiously. Sesshoumaru cleared the security parameters in place wordlessly. The doors in front of them slid open.
"Wow." Kagome found herself in awe at the gigantic expanse in front of her. It was like an underground stadium, except with machinery and screens cluttered by the walls. A lone table with a figure was in the centre, trapped behind panes of what Kagome thought, must've been bulletproof glass. All around them, scientists were absorbed in front of their screens. Dangerous looking chemicals littered the lab benches, Bunsen burners were left alit, beakers were filled with unknown compounds.
"Uh Sesshoumaru, are you sure it's safe in there?" She asked cautiously, not quite finding the fact that a scientist nearly tripped and spilled a beaker filled with red liquid at the scientist in front of him endearing.
"It is not as though you have a corporal body," He replied with a slightly miffed tone.
"Oh right," Kagome blushed while replying. He led her to the centre of the room, where the glass panes were set up around a table with a figure on it. Upon closer inspection, it appeared to be a person of some sort. A person that looked eerily familiar…
"Hey, is that supposed to be me?" She asked, eyes widening upon realization. The figure lying on the metal table had long black hair that framed a pale face. A large white sheet covered the girl's body, so that only her head and arms showed.
He raised his hand in a wave of dismissal as the scientists respectfully retreated back to their work after the initial bowing at their boss's entrance.
"Perhaps," He replied mysteriously, looking at the unconscious girl in front of them from beyond the pane of glass.
"Can I … see?" Kagome asked hesitantly, hand barely an inch from the pane of glass. Sesshoumaru appeared to consider the request for a moment, before nodding briefly. Kagome flashed him a grateful smile before allowing herself to pass through the glass.
"The test subject does not appear to be able to become conscious," One of his scientists mumbled upon approaching Sesshoumaru. Sesshoumaru turned to stare at him.
"I believe… I may have found the key," He spoke in a solemn voice. The scientist looked at him dubiously before using a finger to adjust his glasses back into place. He turned to stare at their experiment, wanting more than anything else to have this dream of his realized. After all, he had been working on the mechanics of creating artificial life since the first year of university.
Kagome was peering over the edge of the table at the girl in front of her. She looked like a perfect replica… She reached out to the girl cheek, as though to touch her. To her surprise, her hand didn't sink into the girl. In fact, to her surprise, she found herself able to feel the coldness of her skin. She wondered who the girl was, and where she came from. And why she looks like me…
A strong feeling of longing swept over her upon being able to touch something corporal. How she missed being able to touch an object or a person substantially… and not be in pain immediately after passing through them. She closed her eyes, willing the anguish filling her away. She wished for nothing more than returning to her life, even though it was filled with sorrowful burdens. She never thought she'd think so, but she would rather live a life of pain than to not live at all…
She didn't notice as a pink light twinkled into existence at the place where her hand touched the slumbering girl's face. Her eyes were closed as she reminisced about how it felt to be able to FEEL something tangible… a memory of what she had when she lived.
Energy began to slip through the pink light, embracing the slumbering girl and Kagome, who was still standing beside her with her eyes closed in concentration.
Sesshoumaru watched as the pink light engulfed Kagome and their experiment, noting that the pink light was the only thing he could see through the glass. The scientist beside him was staring in awe, his mouth slightly agape.
Finally, the pink light subsided. The girl was still unconscious on the table. But Kagome's missing… Sesshoumaru found himself observing.
"Great deity from above… she has a heartbeat." The scientist gasped in surprise and reverence.
"Taishou-sama… she's alive." He said in a voice barely louder than a whisper.
Sesshoumaru smirked. While many hailed him as a genius, he had still felt inferior to his father. Though this time, he had to admit, he felt pretty good.
He was frustrated. Even though the hotel provided them a panoramic view of the ocean and a far off island in the distance, the beautiful imagery wasn't enough to distract him from the fact that he was officially half an hour late. He absentmindedly checked his watch for the upteenth time that day. He wondered if Izayoi would be there…
Kyoko, who was sitting beside him, placed a hand on his wrist. He looked at her in surprise.
"Excuse me, Uncle and Aunty. I was wondering if Touga-san and I would be able to spend some time together…" She asked shyly after pulling her hand away from him. Touga's parents smiled at her.
"By all means, Kyoko darling. We have much to discuss with your father regardless," Touga's father warmly replied. Kyoko looked to her father for permission. He gave her a silent nod.
"Enjoy yourselves, my dears," Touga's mother smiled. Kyoko returned the smile with what she hoped was a grateful one. Touga took the cue to excuse himself from the table, and holding out a hand for Kyoko. Kyoko took it gracefully before standing up. Touga led her away from their parents, trying to hide his anxiety.
Once they were out of the hotel, Kyoko stopped. Touga turned to look at her.
"I would like to meet her," She said softly upon releasing her hand from his. Touga raised an eyebrow.
"Have fun on your date," She smiled as happily as she could. Touga's eyes widened in knowledge.
"Why are you doing this?" He asked hesitantly. Kyoko gave him a knowing look.
"I don't want to follow my mother's footsteps," She replied mysteriously. They stared at each other for a moment, ignoring the people who passed by them into and out of the hotel.
"Have fun, ne?" She smiled tentatively before turning away from him. Touga found himself reaching out to stop her by capturing her wrist in his hand.
"Wait…" Touga said softly. Kyoko didn't turn to look at him. "Where are you going?"
"I don't know… I didn't have a follow-up plan after leaving our parents' overbearing presence, actually," She laughed at her lack of foresight. Touga didn't know what compelled him to say what he said, but at the time, it felt like the right thing to say.
"Come with me…" He said in his rich baritone voice. Kyoko finally turned to stare at him in the eyes. Their eyes locked, and Touga was surprised at how much emotion she conveyed with only her eyes. She looked relieved, thankful… At the moment, she really appeared to glow with happiness. Touga suddenly felt a stab of want. He quickly quenched that feeling when he thought of Izayoi.
"We're late," He quickly said to prevent himself from giving away his emotions. Kyoko smiled, placing her hand in his as he led her to his car. Touga held onto her hand tightly, finding himself unwilling to let go.
Inuyasha sighed as he drove down a particularly empty street. He hadn't heard from Kikyou since she stormed out earlier that day, and he was very concerned. She never ignored him like this, not even when she found out that he was sleeping with some random girl he met at a charity gala.
He tried to get her to see that it was a one night stand more than anything, and that he had been too inebriated to remember much of it anyway. In fact, he didn't even know the identity of the girl that he had slept with, and he still didn't. She didn't take it very well, in fact they had broken up, but at least she still sent him hate texts and the occasional hate phone call in response to him trying to get her back. But ignoring him? A new level of hate, he supposed.
It wasn't his fault the girl so much resembled Kikyou… Down to the dress and mask and height and hair… How was he supposed to know that his girlfriend's doppelganger was invited to the charity gala anyways? He involuntarily found himself remembering that night a little over three years ago…
"Kikyou, remind me why we have to go to this stupid gala and why we can't stay at my condo as we had originally planned," Inuyasha whined in the limo. Kikyou shot him a dark look from behind her mask.
"Because it's a CHARITY gala, with an emphasis on CHARITY. If you don't attend, people will think you have a black heart, like Ebenezer Scrooge," She snapped. Inuyasha gulped quickly.
"Um… you're beautiful, Kikyou," Inuyasha said hastily, taking Kikyou's hand and placing a chaste kiss on it. Kikyou gave him a brief smile. Inuyasha smiled back. She looked delicious. She was wearing a floor length red dress that was revealing, but not too revealing. It complimented his red tie and tux perfectly. She had a red mask to match.
Inuyasha resisted the urge to sneeze under his mask. He hated wearing them, but for some odd reason the organizer of the gala had a passion for masquerades… How unfortunate for those who hate them.
The first person he looked for upon getting to the hotel was the waiter. There was nothing quite like a glass of white wine to start off a party. Kikyou could only look on with a mild look of disgust before going off to find friends to talk to.
Inuyasha tuned out the opening speeches as he downed his wine. He had just finished his third glass when the lights dimmed, and a spotlight appeared, shining upon an elderly couple. Classical music began to fill the room as the couple began to dance. Everyone in the audience watched as they danced. Then, they bowed to each other after the song finished. The orchestra began another song as other couples went dance.
Inuyasha quickly scanned the room for Kikyou. Maybe Kikyou would be in a better mood if they danced… After all, if there was one thing that Kikyou loved, it was dancing to classical music. She claimed that it was really romantic. Inuyasha, in an attempt to please her, had gotten an acquaintance to teach him how to dance immediately after. He never got a chance to show Kikyou how well he danced…
Then, he spotted her in the crowd. She was talking to a woman that he didn't recognize. He approached them quickly before muttering an 'excuse me', whilst pulling Kikyou away.
"Hey, what are you…" Kikyou said in a slightly high pitched voice. Inuyasha didn't answer as he pulled her to the dance floor and began to dance with her. "Shhh…" Inuyasha said before pulling her into his embrace as they danced. Kikyou's cheeks were slightly pink, but she didn't speak. Perhaps if she did, things would turn out differently.
As it were, after the dance, Inuyasha leaned in to kiss her. She was surprised at first, but responded soon after. Inuyasha pulled away a bit after, not giving her time to recover as he pulled her out of the ballroom. He took the hotel key from one of the patrons who was about to step into the elevator to go to their room and led Kikyou into the elevator, quickly pressing the buttons for the door to close before the patron could recover from shock.
"What're…" Kikyou asked in a slightly high pitched voice again. Inuyasha responded with another fervent kiss. His hazed mind didn't register that the girl in front of him had a slightly higher pitched voice than his girlfriend.
"Picking up where we left off," He spoke huskily before capturing her lips again. He hastily led her out of the elevator, opened the door to their hotel room before helping her out of her dress. He was about to rip off his mask when Kikyou stopped him.
"Keep it on," She said softly. Inuyasha felt faintly confused before his mind focused on the desire he felt for the girl in front of him. They made quick work of their clothing and within a few minutes, they were reunited like past lovers.
The next morning, Inuyasha woke to find himself alone in a large four-poster bed, naked under the covers in an unfamiliar hotel room. He groaned as he quickly showered, hoping to assuage the massive headache that he had thanks to a hangover. He quickly texted Kikyou from his phone before leaving the hotel room. Before leaving however, he found Kikyou's mask on the floor next to the door. He picked it up with every intention of returning it to its owner.
"Where did you go after the hot sex we had last night?" Kikyou fumed angrily as she stalked into the coffee shop. Inuyasha smiled as he leaned in to give her a kiss.
"Go to hell," She said as she reached for his steaming latte and splashed it in his face. "We're over, Inuyasha. I don't know who you had hot sex with last night, but quite frankly, I don't want to know. All I know was that you left me last night, and I had to take a dirty cab home."
Inuyasha was sputtering on the steaming latte that was currently streaming down his face and onto his tuxedo. Kikyou gave him a cold look before walking away from him.
"And don't you dare call me again," She yelled over her shoulder. Everyone in the coffee shop watched her exit and the helpless Inuyasha sputtering at the latte still running down his face.
A/N: Sorry for the belated chapter! It's slightly longer than usual, so hopefully that makes up for it… somewhat? :)