Chapter 7: looking-glass-self

Personal ranting: allright chapter 7 already XD I just wondering if people actually are still interested seeing as Fai didn't get a big leading role in the previous chapters… I have another story in mind, started writing it too yet hit a block on how I should write it :p Enough rambling, enjoy the next chapter!
If you know a little bit of psychology/ sociology you'll enjoy it for sure XD

Kurogane had thought about the meaning about the idea of levels. The first, with Yuui, clearly was the conscious level. Fai directly thought he had killed his brother, he remembered this by himself. But since remembering was an active and dynamic process the police succeeded in convincing him that the death of Yuui was his fault. He had really believed so himself, luckily he was proven wrong and by defeating his brother Kurogane had released the real memory once more.
Ashura however was bit more… subconscious. The memory seemed clear and detailed but Kurogane was sure that Fai wouldn't be able to remember a lot of the things he had seen when he woke up. Things as grim as rape are suppressed, hidden in the depths of our mind and when we least expect it, those feelings resurface, like a volcano erupting. However it was the price for this mechanism, enabling us to live with unbearable pain. In some cases we find someone to carry the pain with us, it was rare to find such a person. But when Kurogane defeated Ashura, he made it clear to Fai he was going to shoulder his pain. They would carry it together, and make life tolerable once more.

What could possibly await him on a lower level? He was in the subconscious of Fai, but after the darkness he had seen Kurogane couldn't imagine something even worse had happened to Fai. What he was sure about, was that anything could happen.

Kurogane was prepared for the worst, but to his surprise at the next level, no person awaited his arrival. In the middle of the floor there was nothing but a mirror, a standing mirror, wider and bigger then Kurogane. The frame, probably made out of wood, was richly detailed, carved out figurines smiling, dancing and talking. He recognized Yuui, Ashura, however he saw two more persons, probably his parents. On the top of the right, he saw himself.'What is this mirror supposed to be?' He asked out loud at his reflection, though surprised he was, to see that his reflection disappeared and made way for a figure he thought he wouldn't see again ever.
Surprised as he was he could barely mutter the name of the small girl in front of him. 'Tomoyo..' As she smiled in reply to her name. She reached out and touched the glass separating them. 'Hello Kurogane, it seems you couldn't really keep yourself out of trouble. Tell me that you at least changed underwear regularly.' She said, clearly stressing the last part of her sentence.
'How could I change underwear I'm in Fai's FREAKING mind.' He grunted in response. 'Besides that, why are you in Fai's mind? Have you met him?'
'I haven't, I wish I could because I would like to meet him.' She says as her eyes suddenly turn cold for a moment. She continues, closing her eyes. 'What does this mirror represent Kurogane? Why does it stand in Fai's subconscious and more importantly why do you see me here?'
'I dunno.' He grunts, Tomoyo looks at him while pouting. 'Yes you do…' She replies. 'After all, I know the answer, and I am a part of you.'
'A part of me?' Kurogane as the answer slips in his mind. 'This mirror, on the subconscious level… Of course…' Tomoyo smiled at the crimson eyed man as she spoke slowly. 'The way we perceive ourselves…' Kurogane continued. 'Is determined by the way others perceive us. This mirror, is Fai's mirror of perceiving, it represents how his personality is made by asking him other people see him... And since I'm looking in it right now…'
'You see what you desire or better said, the one thing you wish to see.' Tomoyo says, finishing Kurogane's sentence. 'Stop this madness Kurogane, this mirror shows what you want and you see for yourself. You don't want Fai, you want me.' As her face hardens, she continues. 'He is broken, used. Why would you even consider someone like that? What do you see in him?' Kurogane replies angrily 'He needs me. I like him, no I love him!'
Tomoyo snorted. 'Love? Kurogane you met the man two days ago, how can you fall in love with someone so fast? Don't fool yourself into this, I'm still waiting for you at home.'
'What the hell do you know about love? You fucking cheated on me!' Kurogane yelled against the girl in the mirror, she was unimpressed as she calmly replied. 'I'm a part of you remember? I am what you feel, projected through this mirror. You doubted this yourself before you came down here. These emotions, are YOURS! This doubt, it originates from you!'

'How do I defeat it?' Kurogane says while glaring at the reflection. 'How do I defeat these emotions?'
'By defeating them the same way you defeated Fai's darkness. Project them through the mirror and kill them. But that means you show Fai what's in your heart Kurogane, if you start lose to your doubts, Fai will shut down completely.' Kurogane growled. 'Why can't it ever be easy? It would be more fun to have a drink together and talk it out.' Tomoyo smiled. 'We are men, we don't talk, we let our fists or swords do the talking for us. Now project your emotions or I'm gonna break the mirror and get out myself.' Kurogane smiled. 'Spoken like a true me.'

Kurogane knew what to do. Well maybe he didn't but his subconscious told him to put his hand on the glass. Tomoyo had disappeared as his reflection and weirdly he mirror didn't seem to reflect him anymore. The moment his hand touched the cold glass he felt a part of him moving, like energy crawling through his hand, making his muscles flex defensively. It didn't hurt him at all. It was more like a part of him, keeping him down, left him. He opened his eyes slowly savoring the lightness of his own heart. Only the feeling of protection and love for Fai were left. He saw himself in the mirror as he clenched his hand to a fist shattering the glass to a million small pieces as he stretched his arm out with all his might. 'Now then…' His reflection said while coming out the frame. 'Let's dance.'

'How do you defeat yourself? How can you fight someone who knows every move you make, anticipates it and counters it the same way you would.' Kurogane thought, his sword pointed above his head ready to strike at whatever his reflection would throw at him.
'You wondering how to defeat me?' His reflection smirks, striking forwards with his own sword, easily getting blocked by Kurogane pushing him back into his original position. 'Truth be told, I don't know either. You want to talk this out?' He says lowering his sword. Kurogane didn't believe it. 'You're trying to ambush me, you'll have to do better than that.' The other Kurogane hissed. 'Damn that would have been a bit too easy indeed. Oh well, let's just see who is the best improviser then.'

Lashing out at each other, the two men moved in an almost perfect synchronized dance of attack and defending. 'This is getting more boring by the minute.' Reflection-Kurogane said, as he closed his eyes pointing his sword upwards in front of his face. Opening his eyes again, the blade covered itself in flames. 'Flames of vengeance.' He whispered slowly. Lashing out the flames slashing fiery streams at Kurogane.
'How the hell did you do that?' Kurogane yelled, as he avoided the flaming slashes his reflection threw at him. 'Oh come on, you should know as well, that this sword gets stronger as your emotions get stronger as well. I knew it, so you do as well.'
'That makes sense, seeing as it transformed into Excalibur when we fought Ashura, damn why haven't I thought about this?' Kurogane grunted cursing himself. So inserting emotions, just like in the mirror? As he closed his eyes, everything faded. It was dangerous, to close them but he had to, to visualizing it. His emotions as a bright light that shone on him. He felt a spark, as he opened his eyes and saw his sword, Excalibur, covered in lightning, jolting and sparking in anticipation. He leaps forward to his reflection, the sword crash against each other. Sparks fly against both man as they push as hard as possible, the impact of the power lunging them across the platform. Kurogane almost falling off the edge and his reflection falling against the side of the empty mirror, as the broken glass cracked under his feet.
Kurogane regained balance as he shot of lighting to the other man, who leaped up in mid-air to avoid the jolts. 'Missed me asshole.' He smirked at Kurogane, who smiled back at him. 'I wasn't aiming at you fucker.' As the lighting hits the glass fragment, breaking the lightning up into thousands of jolts and reflecting it upwards toward the airborne man. Hitting him hard, making him scream in agony as he slowly fell back down, burned and smoking. This was the moment Kurogane had waited for, as he ran forward screaming 'HAMA RYUUOUJIN!'

'Doubts my ass.' Kurogane said as his reflection dissolved into thin air.