Sorry I took so long getting this one up! I managed to get the talking fish in for this one, and in answer to sakurahanaalice's question: yes, Link does get the bow, in this very chapter in fact!
Also, to sakurahanaalice's brother: You're absolutely right, I'll have Link steal something next time he goes to Hyrule! And I completely forgot about the auction house, thanks for reminding me! I'll put it in the next chapter somewhere. As for the pearls, they're sort of stuck in those statues right now, I could have Link try and get them back, but probably the only thing that'll end up happening is that he'll nearly get himself killed as he tries to throw his bombs and/or boomerang at it, lol.
Also, I forgot to mention earlier that I do accept anonymous reviews, so if you like being secretive and mysterious, and wearing cool ninja outfits... well, now you can!
Chapter 5
The Wind and Earth Sages
Link and the king of Hyrule, who was now back to possessing the little red boat, had traveled for days before they finally reached their destination, only to have the way into the Earth Temple blocked by a large stone. After Link had exhausted all of his ideas on the rock (throwing his boomerang at it until he knocked himself out by getting hit one to many times by the weapon, throwing his grappling hook at hit, and using his bombs to throw himself at the rock), Larry/the king of Hyrule decided that they needed something else. So after Link gave the rock a good kick for annoying him, he marched back to the boat and started to put the sail up. Before he could, however, a large fish jumped out of the water and smacked poor Link on the face with one of its fins. Link screamed and jumped into the water. "The fish won't get me in here!" Link said happily, only to jump back out of the water in fear when the fish gave his foot a nudge. Link jumped back into the boat and peered fearfully down into the clear water. " 'Hoy there small fry!" said a scratchy voice from the other side of the boat. Link gave another scream and turned around; the fish's head was poking out of the water and he was waving with a large fin. "Booooo, it talks! Kill the evil fish!" Link shouted and started to try and hit it with his boomerang.
The fish ignored this and started to go on this long speech about how he was a talking fish (Link paused from his failing attacks long enough to shout out "Well duh!"), and that there were more of him around, and that they liked bait. "I'm not giving you any bait!" Link shouted. "It's all mine, muhahahahaha!" Link said before he started to chew on the bait that he had in his bait bag. The boat simply watched all of this with an amused expression. "So, I noticed you were trying to get into the Earth Temple? I know of a place that can help you get rid of the rock, small fry!" the fish said, moving slightly to the left to avoid Link's grappling hook.
"I'm not small, I'm Super Link! And what's a fry anyway?"
"Beats me! Anyway, you have to go to an island that is made up of a volcano that just never quits. You have to find a way of getting inside said volcano, and inside is the treasure!"
"Treasure? I love treasure!" Link shouted, ceasing his attacks on the fish so he could listen better.
"Just head, um… south? Yeah, south!" the fish said uncertainly.
"Ok then!" Link said happily, starting to get his sail ready.
He stopped when the fish cleared his throat, "Ahem! Aren't you forgetting something? Like maybe rewarding the little fish who helped you?"
"You're right!" Link said, reaching into his pocket. "Take this!" he shouted, shooting at the fish with his bow.
"Hey, how did you get that!?" the boat asked as Link kept shooting (and missing) at the fish.
"Um, I found it," Link said.
"When? I don't remember that!"
"Silence fool! We must go south now!" Link shouted, and he threw the sail up, completely forgetting about the fish who was muttering to himself about good for nothing kids. They arrived at the previously mentioned island in less than a day. "Oh no! It's a volcano!" Link shouted.
"That's what the fish said!" the boat said impatiently. "Well…good luck getting in!"
"But it's scary in there!" Link protested as he tried to put one foot on the hot ground. "It's too hot too!"
"Well what did you expect? It's a volcano."
"Oh boooooo! I know, I'll use my wind baton!"
"What good will that do?" the boat asked. He was ignored though as Link started to wave his wind baton around in random directions. He managed to play the wind's requiem a few times, and the song that turns day into night and the other way around. "Nothing is happening!" Link said in a surprised voice.
"No kidding."
Suddenly the two were sucked into a giant tornado! In the very center of this cyclone was a large frog who looked just like the one Link had met at Dragon Roost Island, except for a difference in color. "Ahha! That's the crazy brother I'm supposed to shoot should I ever meet him!" Link said, happy that he actually had a reason this time for shooting at something. The boat sighed, "We're dead." he said as he remembered all the other times Link had tried to hit something.
"No we're not, we're super heroes!" Link shouted before shooting a volley of arrows at the giant frog. But the boat was right, and the strong winds forced the arrows around and back to the person who had fired them. "Nooooo!" Link shouted, ducking to avoid the sharply pointed sticks. Suddenly the giant frog began to laugh as the two were sent flying higher and higher through the air. "Foolish mortals! You cannot defeat me, take this!" he shouted at them before sending them flying towards the north. Link's scream could be heard by all the inhabitants of the islands that they passed over during their flight. They eventually landed inside a hollowed out mountain type thing.
"Great, how are we supposed to get out of here?" Link asked, beginning to pout. Before his boat could answer him though, a fairy in the form of a creepy little girl appeared out of nowhere. "Hi there! I am the leader of all the fairies, and I'll give you a gift!" she said, tossing her little doll around.
"Yeah, whatever," was the only thing Link said. He then gave a high pitched scream when two smaller fairies, one blue and the other red, came flying straight at him and hit him several times with their little wands. "Stop that!" Link shouted, swatting away at the little fairies. Larry watched, trying to keep himself from laughing. Eventually he couldn't hold back anymore and he let out a loud "Teehee!" Everyone stopped what they were doing and stared at him. The two little fairies finally went back to hitting Link, and after awhile they went flying off, shouting something about finding someone else to hit now that they were finally freed. "What was all that for!?" Link shouted at the creepy little girl/fairy.
"That was for your bow which just magically appeared a few days ago! Now you can shoot out ice and fire!"
"Yay! Maybe I can use this to get inside the scary volcano which will probably lead to my death!" Link thought over what he had said for a few minutes before screaming. "I don't want to die!" he shouted.
"Link, you know what?" the fairy said thoughtfully.
"What?" Link asked cautiously.
"You're just my type!" she giggled.
"Yeah, whatever."
The fairy gasped, "How dare you speak to me that way! Be gone from this place!" she shouted as she threw her doll at Link.
"Oh it's scary!" Link shouted as he threw the doll back.
"Take this!" the fairy shouted, this time waving her wand around. Larry/the king of Hyrule and Link were sent flying all the way back to the volcano island.
"Yay! Now to get the treasure!" Link said as he pulled his bow out. He set it so it would shoot out fire arrows before firing non-stop at the very top of the mountain.
"Link you fool, you're supposed to use ice!" Larry said impatiently.
"Oh but, I'm fighting fire with fire," Link said, confused as to why it wasn't working.
"Just use the stupid ice!"
"Alright fine!"
A few seconds later and the volcano's non-stop fire spewing had stopped. "Hurry, you only have a little bit of time before the volcano melts the ice that's blocking it!" Larry said.
"The treasure is all mine now!" Link started to cackle maniacally as he went running off. A few minutes later and he was seen running the other way as he tried to find a way to climb up the mountain. The boat watched Link's slow progress as he jumped around on the mountain, trying to climb up and then falling a few minutes later. Finally Link grew tired of this and so he pulled out his grappling hook and used it to climb up that way. Eventually he reached the very top of the mountain and a few seconds later he was falling into the depths of the volcano and being attacked by bats that were on fire. Link screamed and went running off, just barely managing to stay on the thin path that was surrounded by lava. He finally stumbled upon a large chest that, amazingly enough, hadn't been destroyed when the volcano had been active. "Treasure!" Link shouted as he opened up the chest. The boy had been expecting something shiny that he could sell for a lot of money, but all that he got was a pair of bracelets. "Jewelry?!" Link shouted disappointedly. "I don't wear jewelry because I am a manly man!" he said, only to end up screaming a few seconds later as the bats finally spotted Link and started to head towards him. Link threw the bracelets at them to distract them while he ran to the only other opening, which just happened to be blocked by a large and heavy rock.
Suddenly, out of nowhere, the bracelets came flying back and clamped themselves tightly to Link's wrists, much to his dismay. "Stupid bracelets!" He shouted, flinging his arms around in an attempt to get them off. He failed at that though, and so he ended up desperately trying to lift the rock as the bats got closer and closer. He was able to lift the rock with ease this time though, and Link proudly marched outside of the volcano, waving happily at Larry the minute he spotted him. "I am Super Link, I am able to lift rocks because I am super strong!" Link shouted down at him, right before a large and colorful bird came swooping down at him and pushed him off of the mountain top. Link fell to the ocean, screaming the whole way down.
…a little less than one day later…
"Here we are! The Earth Temple!" Link said happily as he jumped out of his boat and onto the shore. "Now remember Link, inside there should be the Earth Sage, so don't-"
"Shut up Larry! I know what to do!" Link interrupted as he marched over to the large rock and lifted it up. He slowly turned around, his large grin being blocked by the rock he was holding in front of him. "Uh, Link? What are you doing?" Larry asked uncertainly right before Link threw the rock at Larry with a laugh. "…You missed," Larry said, making Link stop his cackling. "Aw man!" Link shouted when he saw the rock just a few inches from where he was standing. "Fine, I'll get the stupid boat later!" Link grumbled, and he ran inside the temple. Inside there was a large slab made of rock with arrows on it pointing in different directions. Underneath these arrows were the words: these arrows seem to be pointing in specific directions…
"Well that's a lot of help!" Link said crossly. He sat around for awhile until Larry finally shouted from outside that he try the wind baton. "I don't think that'll do any good, but ok," Link said as he pulled out the aforementioned item and began to randomly wave it around. The boat sighed when all Link did was change the wind direction a few times and skip ahead a few days. "Link you fool, follow the arrows!"
"Alright fine!" Link shouted back. Link did as he was told, and a few seconds later he was playing a pretty song. After he had finished he started to clap for himself, when suddenly a strong gust of wind came into the room. Link grabbed his hat so it wouldn't go flying before turning around to face a tall person who resembled a fish. "Another fish!? Take this stupid fish!" Link shouted as he started to shoot his bow at the woman/fish. The arrows went right through her though, as she simply stared at him with a calm expression. "I am the Earth Sage, I was killed by Ganondorf."
"Haha!" Link shouted at her.
The sage ignored him, "You must find my replacement and bring him or her here."
"Oh oh, can I be the replacement?" Link asked, jumping up and down and raising his hand.
"…No."
"Darn!"
"You will know the person by the instrument the person carries. It resembles mine," the sage said.
"You mean the mini harp?" Link asked, beginning to get bored.
"Yeah… I guess. Good luck!"
"Yeah, whatever."
Link went running back outside, ignoring whatever else the sage had to say, and hopped back into his boat. "Hey Link, why don't we go back to Dragon Roost Island?" Larry said cheerfully.
"Because I don't want to that's why!" Link shouted.
"Well that's where the next sage is so hop to it!"
"Alright fine! Hey, how do you know the next sage is there?"
"Um… because I am the all knowing king, teehee!"
"Yeah, whatever," Link said as he steered the boat in the direction of Dragon Roost Island. After an hour or two Link started to get bored, so he demanded that Larry play a game with him. "Oh fine, how about I-spy!" Larry said finally.
"Yay! Game, game!" Link said, jumping up and down in joy and almost falling out of the boat.
"I spy something big and blue," Larry said.
"Um, um, really? Where? No, don't tell me! I got this one!" Link was silent for a long time until Larry finally got bored.
"It's the ocean you fool!"
"Oh yeah! Ok, I got one for you! I spy something big and blue!"
"You do? Um, don't tell me… I know this one… the ocean?"
"Wow you're good!" Link said, clapping for the boat.
"My turn! I spy something big and blue!"
"Really? Where?"
Suffice it to say, this went on the whole way, and both of them took forever to figure out what the other was looking at, even though they picked the same thing each time. After a few hours of this, they finally arrived at their destination. As they were too busy playing their game, however, and not paying attention, they ended up stranded on the beach and it took Link forever to push Larry back into the water. Once this was done Link went running off to the city where the bird people lived, completely forgetting that the last time he had visited them it hadn't exactly gone well. "I'm here!" Link announced the minute he arrived inside. Everyone else stopped what they were doing and turned around to look at the boy. Suddenly a loud voice shouted down, "It's the guy who stole the pearl, the wind baton, and my grappling hook! Get him!" Medli shouted. Link screamed as the birds started to swoop down at him, trying to grab him. Link ran in a blind panic up the ramp and outside through another door. Here he had a few minutes to rest as the birds had completely forgotten about him the minute he had disappeared. As Link recovered from his run, he could just make out the faint sounds of a harp being plucked. Link climbed further up the mountain with the help of his grappling hook and then stopped short when he saw Medli.
"But I just saw you inside! How did you get here so fast?" Link shouted at her.
Medli turned around in surprise, "Link! You came back!"
"…Well yeah! You were the one who announced it!"
"Oh, that must have been my crazy twin sister, she's psycho!" Medli said, pointing up in the sky where a Medli look-alike was twirling around in the sky and battling a flock of seagulls. "Huh," was the only thing Link could say. "Um, which one of you is the real Medli then?"
"Me!" both of them shouted at the same time.
Poor Link was extremely confused, but then he noticed the instrument that was in 'Medli's' hands. "Oh hey look! A mini harp!" he shouted, just remembering his mission.
"Yeah, I'm not that good at it…" she said right before playing an elaborate song.
"Show off," Link muttered. "Oh! I have an instrument too!" he shouted as he pulled out his wind baton. "Tada!"
"Oh wow! Are you going to conduct me?" Medli asked happily.
"No, I'm going to play a magical melody!" Link said as he waved the stick around in random directions, again. Somehow (no one knows how he managed it, not even the goddesses), Link played the song he had learned, and then forgotten, in the Earth Temple. "That's a boring song!" the psycho twin sister shouted down at them as she landed near Link.
"No it's not!" the other sister argued.
"Is!"
"Not!"
"Is!"
"Not!"
Link stared at the two twins as they bickered, wondering which one of these was the real sage. He hoped that it was the nice one and not the psycho one. But, it was just Link's luck when suddenly the psycho one grabbed her own harp and started to play the song that Link had. "See! Lame!" she shouted, right before collapsing. The other two watched her fall and hit her head on the hard ground, not even trying to help her. "What's up with her?" the bird asked, right before the psycho sister woke up.
"I, Medli, am the Earth Sage!" she shouted, starting to cackle happily.
"I'm Medli!" the other girl protested.
"Oh whoever you are, let's go!" Link shouted, grabbing the new sage and dragging her all the way back to his boat. Along the way they met the prince, who was standing on the balcony with a small flower. "Hey, play along," Medli whispered, suddenly remembering how to walk again. "Hey Komali! What's up?" Medli said in a fake sweet voice.
"I picked this flower for you!" the prince said happily.
"Awww, for me?" Link said.
"No, for Medli!" the prince said, scowling at the boy who had stolen his pearl.
"That's great Komali, but there's one problem…" Medli said.
"Oh?"
"I hate you! Muhahahaha, so long loser!" the bird shouted before grabbing Link and pulling him down the path.
"Wow, you're good!" Link said before joining in with her evil laughing.
The boat watched as the two kids came down the mountain, both of them cackling maniacally. Larry began to laugh too, trying to fit in, but by the time the other two were in hearing distance of the boat they had stopped laughing, so all that ended up happening was Larry ended up very embarrassed, and he was quiet the rest of the day. "Where are we going anyway?" Medli asked as Link threw the sail up. Since there was no room Link had made her sit on the very edge of the boat, in constant danger of falling off. "The Earth Temple, you have to do some crazy ritual so that power to the Master Sword is returned," Link said.
"How come I'm not sage of the Wind Temple? I'm the one who can fly!" Medli shouted, her speaking problems starting to come back.
"I don't know!" Link shouted back as they finally approached the temple.
"So long loser!" both Link and Medli shouted at Larry as they went skipping inside the temple.
"Ok, play the earth song!" Link demanded.
"Never!" Medli shouted.
"But you have to, otherwise I can never get my sword to glow!" Link said, starting to suck his thumb in his distress.
"Oh fine," Medli said as she pulled out her mini harp. She played the song, again, and then waited in silence for something to happen.
"Larry! It didn't work!" Link shouted outside. The boat's response was drowned out, however, when suddenly the large slab of rock blew up, hitting both Medli and Link in the head.
Both of the kids gasped at the rock's impudence and stomped on the remains of said rock. After awhile of doing this the two ran through the opening that had been covered by the rock before it blew up. After a long time of running away from scary monsters that popped out of nowhere and tried to eat them alive, the two finally arrived in a large room that had a bottomless pit of doom in it. Link had also received a new shield, but he refused to wear it because he liked his old one. Just as he was explaining this to Medli, he got a splinter from his old shield. "Splinter! Take this stupid shield!" Link shouted as he threw the wooden shield down the bottomless pit of doom before putting his new mirror shield on his back. "Hey, you dropped that! I'll get it!" Medli shouted before jumping down, following the shield into the bottomless pit of doom. "Medli, nooooooo!" Link shouted after her.
"Hey, there's these weird hand things moving around. I like them!" Medli could be heard shouting.
"Oh no, now she's going to be eaten and then… hey, she's going to be eaten! I'm freeeeeee!" Link shouted and started to dance a jig.
"Hey Link, I got your shield!" Medli shouted in his ear all of the sudden.
"Good feelings gone," Link said with a sigh. "Thanks, stupid bird."
"You're welcome stupid human! Now let's go!" Medli said (they had an interesting relationship). The two entered the next room, Medli was slightly in back of Link, zigzagging back and forth and talking to herself about collecting all of the golden feathers so no one else could get them, when suddenly the door they were passing under closed tight, separating Link and Medli. Link, the poor fellow, was stuck in the room with the giant ghost, and Medli was stuck with the bottomless pit of doom, which she promptly jumped into when she found she couldn't open the door (what else could one do?).
Meanwhile, Link was running around, trying to dodge the crazy giant ghost who was trying to hit the boy with his lantern. He was so busy running around that he didn't even notice the crazy guy with a flashlight who was running around above him, turning his light on and off at different places. Link ran through one of these spots at one point, and, fortunately for Link, the ghost had been right behind him. The light hit Link's new shield and bounced off of it, hitting the ghost. "Nooooo, you destroyed me!" the ghost shouted, startling Link and causing him to stop and turn around. Meanwhile, the flashlight guy quickly turned his light off, but it was too late, the ghost was already going through a very dramatic death which involved doing a part of some sort of ballet and then a long opera. Link covered his ears, trying to block out the ghost's horrible voice. This went on for about four hours, which was rather short compared to most operas. Finally the ghost disappeared, opening the large doors before he did. Medli came flying in, being chased by all of the hand things that had been in the bottomless pit of doom. "How did they get out!?" Link shouted at her as they ran around, avoiding all of the hands.
"I helped them out, duh!" Medli shouted back at him.
"Why would you do that?" Link asked, almost crying.
"Because they asked me to!" Medli said like it was the most obvious thing in the world.
Link finally managed to get rid of the hand monsters by throwing his bombs all over the place. Luckily for Link, there were so many of them that he didn't even have to worry about where he was throwing them. "Now, play the stupid song!" Link shouted before realizing that Medli wasn't there. "Medli? Where are you?" he asked in a small voice.
"I'm up here! I'm stuck!" Medli shouted from above him. Link looked up, but Medli didn't appear to be stuck on anything. She was simply flying around, trying to stay in one spot. "What are you stuck on?" he asked in a confused voice.
"The air!" Medli shouted.
"Oh for crying out loud! Just stop flapping your wings!" Link shouted.
"That's a stupid idea!" Medli said, but she did it anyway. A few minutes later and she was playing her song, even though she was tired of it. Before Link could start dancing along, his sword zapped him as some of its power was restored. "Ow! Stupid sword, take this!" he shouted, throwing it. The sword went flying through the air and hit Medli, who threw her harp at Link, who then threw the boomerang, but as usual he missed and the boomerang came back and hit him. In the end, the two left on very bad terms and Medli refused to stay in the temple to pray. Instead she spent the rest of Link's adventure in the bottomless pit of doom, annoying all of the hand monsters (which had magically re-appeared) with her song.
The first thing Link did when he arrived back at the beach was give Larry a big hug. "Get off! What's that for?" Larry asked in an annoyed voice.
"I missed being the annoying one in there," Link said, still hugging the boat. "You have to come next time, she was horrible!"
"Link, I'm a boat."
"Ahha! I've got you now!" Link said, releasing the boat and clapping gleefully. "You're actually a dead king!"
"Yeah, but I'm a boat right now…"
"Oh. Well fine!" Link said grumpily as he set the sail up to take them to the Wind Temple. At this temple, there was something else blocking the way inside; a strong gust of wind that even bent the trees that had somehow managed to grow in front of it. Link tried to throw a bomb at the source of this wind, but the bomb was blown back to him, much to the boy's dismay and the boat's amusement. He tried all of his other weapons, but they all failed miserably. With a small pout, Link headed back to Larry. Before he could say anything though, the same fish from before came out of nowhere and once again slapped Link in the face. " 'Hoy there small fry! I noticed you were trying to get into that temple, well you need something that'll make you weigh a ton! Where do you get such an item you ask? Um, north?" the fish, pausing as he tried to remember.
"Ok! North it is!" Link shouted as he threw the sail up and set off, not even going north but in a different direction all together. The fish sighed at him before swimming off, slightly upset that he hadn't gotten any food.
Somehow the pair made it to the island that they needed to get to. "Oh it's so cold here!" Link said, glad for once that his clothes were so warm. "I will now fight ice with ice!" Link shouted, shooting his ice arrows at the dragon head thing that was on the mountain, spewing out snow and ice.
"Link just use the fire arrows," Larry said tiredly.
"Fine," Link said, already shooting fire arrows. "But I don't see what good it'll do…" The rest of Link's thought was cut off when the mountain was instantly warmed up enough to be walked on. "Hooray! More treasure! It better be cooler than the stupid bracelets!" Link said as he started to climb up. Once he was inside the mountain he was instantly attacked by bats who were covered in ice. Link ran around and stumbled on yet another chest. "Muhahahaha!" Link shouted as he opened the chest, hoping that there was money in this one. All that was there, however, were a pair of boots that were so heavy Link could hardly lift them. "Great, a pair of shoes to go with my jewelry," Link grumbled as he stomped around in his new boots. He was just able to dodge the bats that were chasing him, since he couldn't really run in the shiny new boots.
He finally made it outside and he stomped all the way to Larry, who was wondering why Link was insisting on wearing the heavy boots when he didn't need to. "Now, back to the stupid temple, where we'll probably have to just leave again to find something else!" Link said as he set the sail up once again. They arrived back at the Wind Temple, playing their I-spy game again, and, once again, they didn't notice that they had arrived so they ended up on the beach. This time though, Link didn't bother to help Larry get unstuck and he just marched over to the rock that was blowing the strong winds and used his ugly hammer to get rid of it. "There! Now, onwards to victory!" Link shouted before he went running in, leaving Larry to try and persuade a curious crab to push him back into the water. Inside the Wind Temple, Link found that the same circumstances that had taken place in the Earth Temple were true here as well. The previous sage, who was a Kokiri this time instead of a Zora, was dead and demanded that Link go and find the new one. "This seems to be a common thing around here…" Link mumbled crossly.
"You need to find the one who carries this instrument!" the sage said, pointedly ignoring Link and showing him a weird looking violin.
"Yeah, whatever."
"Well, what are you waiting for? Hop to it!"
"Alright fine! But I'm stealing your instrument first!" Link shouted as he tried to grab the violin. However, just like the Kokiri, the violin was also...dead. So Link ended up going right through it. "Stupid sage!" Link shouted, and went stomping back outside, still in his heavy boots.
He was surprised to see that Larry had gotten back into the water on his own; when Link asked him how he had managed this, all Larry had said was a mysterious "teehee!", so Link was left to figure it out on his own, which he never did. As they departed to the Forest Haven (which was what Larry had suggested as he was the all knowing king of Hyrule), a little crab waved happily at them before running away when a large shadow of a seagull flew over him. The mysterious seagull watched the boat sail away before heading back to the Forsaken Fortress to report where the brother of its leader was.
…Meanwhile, in the Forsaken Fortress…
"Ahhahahaha! I have complete control over the seagulls!"
"How many times are you going to say that!?" Ganondorf asked, interrupting Aryll's five hour rant about how powerful she was.
"As many times as I want to! Now go put these over the spotlights!" she commanded, handing the dark man large sheets of pink paper.
"But this will make all the lights look pink!" the evil man protested.
"That's the point you fool! I like pink!"
"I thought you hated pink…"
"Well I changed my mind, so ha! Now get moving slacker!"
"Yes ma'am." Ganondorf said sulkily before walking off with the large sheets of paper.
"Now, where is my stupid brother?" Aryll demanded of the seagull that had just landed next to her. The seagull's only response was a loud squawk. "Well that's no help at all! I need a spy who can actually talk!" she said, shooing the bird away. "Oh Ganon, get over here!" she shouted just as the lights that were swinging around turned a pink color.
"What now?" Ganondorf asked in a frustrated voice as he stomped into the room.
"I need a better spy!" Aryll said, shooting him her evilly persuasive puppy dog eyes.
"Oh fine! I've got just the thing for you!" Ganondorf said, unable to ignore the cute little girl. "Ahhahahaha! Excellent! Soon we will stop my stupid brother and get the Master Sword, then I can take over the world!"
"Don't you mean we can take over the world?" Ganondorf asked anxiously.
"No. Just me. You can be my minion if you want," Aryll said.
"Ok," Ganondorf said miserably before going to mope in a corner.
…at Forest Haven…
"Here we are!" Link said happily as they glided gently closer to the shore. "I'll go find the next stupid sage so that we can have full power!" Link shouted, swinging his sword around and chopping a large plant that had been just about to eat him, in half, without even noticing. Link marched all the way to the Great Deku Tree, ignoring the muffled sounds of a violin that seemed to be coming from behind a waterfall. "Greetings Deku Tree!" Link shouted, hitting the tree with his sword in an attempt to wake it up.
"Hello Link, what do you want now?" the tree asked crossly.
Link gave a high pitched scream, "It talks! Burn the evil tree!" Link shouted and started to shoot his fire arrows at it. The tree just sighed tiredly as Link completely missed the large tree and ended up hitting everything else. "Did you need something?" the tree asked after Link had exhausted all of his arrows. "Do you know where Makar is?" Link asked as he ran around the forest to collect his arrows. "He's hiding somewhere and practicing his funny looking violin playing." the tree said patiently as Link screamed that the evil tree could talk and that he had to burn it. After awhile Link thanked the tree and went skipping back outside. Link swung from a tree branch and landed inside a small cave behind the large waterfall that was outside. "Makar, listen to this song!" Link said happily as he pulled out his wind baton. He didn't do anything for a few minutes, and Makar waited patiently the whole time. "Um, I just realized that I never learned the song… I'll be right back!" Link said as he ran back to his boat to return to the Wind Temple.
…two days later…
"Ok!" Link shouted as he re-entered the cave. "Hey Makar, listen to this song!" Link said happily as he started to wave around the wind baton. "I liked the other one better, but I guess it's ok…" Link said as the little plant guy started to play along.
"I'm the wind sage? How come I'm not the earth sage, I'm a plant for crying out loud!" Makar shouted as soon as they were finished.
"Don't ask me, it was the all knowing king of Hyrule's idea!" Link said, hiding from the scary plant.
"Oh fine, let's go!" Makar said, suddenly cheerful again.
"Yay!" Link shouted, and he picked up the new sage and tossed him into the river so he would be carried over to the boat. "Muhahahaha!" Link cackled as he ran back to the beach. The little plant guy was forced to sit on Larry's head since Link refused to move over to make room in the main part of the boat for him. They soon arrived back at the Wind Temple and the new team were soon dodging more rock rubble as the large rock slab blew up the minute Makar had finished his song. The two soon found that they had to jump down into a hole; Link let Makar go first since he didn't want to die. "If I hear you screaming in fear about monsters, then I know not to follow you!" Link said cheerfully as he gave the poor plant a shove down the hole.
Link poked his head down the hole and listened carefully. When he didn't hear anything scary, he jumped down, only to land on Makar as the little guy hadn't yet moved away. "Stupid plant, move it!" Link said, not bothering to move himself. The two finally got sorted out and they were able to examine their surroundings. "This place is confusing," Link said as they stared at the room they were in. "It's the Wind Temple, and yet there are plants everywhere… I'm confused!" Link shouted, throwing Makar in his frustration. The little sage landed on the other side of the room, right on an area of soft soil. "Hey swordsman, I can plant a tree here!" Makar said as he started to throw his collection of seeds all over the place. One of these managed to land on the soft soil and it instantly started to grow into a small tree. "Well that's a lot of help," Link said sarcastically. "Hey, now we can make paper!" Link said happily. Makar turned around to see Link running towards him with an axe that he stolen from the crazy axe guy that was just sitting in one of the corners. Makar gave out a little scream and went running away to get out of the way of the crazed swordsman. Fortunately for the new tree, Link still had very little strength, so the only thing that happened was Link fell backwards the minute he hit it with his new axe. The axe broke, so Link couldn't use it anymore, much to his disappointment. Link sighed before returning the broken axe to the crazy axe guy. "Now what do we do?" Makar asked as he gazed up at the tall cliff they had to somehow climb.
"Oh oh! I've got an idea! Me me!" Link shouted, jumping up and down, his hand raised up in the air.
"Um, what is it?" Makar asked cautiously.
Link ran up to Makar and picked him up, "Fly little plant guy, fly! Carry me up there!"
"You're sort of heavy…"
"That's quitter talk! Nobody likes a quitter!" Link shouted, giving Makar a little shake to try and get him to do something of use.
"Fine," Makar muttered and started to try and pull the two of them up. After awhile they finally started to rise. They were nearly there when suddenly Link remembered something, "Hang on! I forgot my new boots!" Link said happily as he slipped them on.
"Nooooo!" Makar shouted as the added weight pulled them back down.
"Stupid Makar! You're useless!" Link said as they landed in a heap back on the ground. "I'll just use this thingy." Link said grumpily as he used his grappling hook to climb up, leaving Makar to find his own way up.
The two eventually came upon a large room that had a bottomless pit of doom just like the Earth Temple. Along this gap were little islands of land that had soft areas of soil on them. Link threw Makar towards the first of these islands so that he could start planting seeds. "While you're doing that, I'll go find the treasure!" Link shouted after the little plant guy as he recovered from the throw. Link went running through the temple, avoiding monsters and screaming really loudly to distract all of the mini-bosses. Eventually he got the hookshot, so he ditched the grappling hook and then went skipping back to where he had left Makar. Makar, who had been starting to have fun while Link was gone, was skipping around and singing his new song. His happy thoughts instantly disappeared the minute Link came in though. "Alright little plant guy, I got the treasure!" Link shouted as he started to hook onto all of the trees that Makar had planted. Eventually Link arrived on the other side of the bottomless pit of doom and the two were soon moving on. "I don't really see why the other sages died," Makar said thoughtfully, mostly to himself since Link had already told the little plant guy that he no longer wished to use his brain for the rest of the day as it was too hard. "I mean, what if I die? I don't want to die!" Makar was just starting to panic about this new idea when he crashed into Link, who had stopped short and was now staring blankly into space. "Link, you have to use your brain a little more than that!" Makar shouted at the boy, flying upwards so he could give Link a good slap on the face.
"Ow! Stupid plant thing! Where are we?" Link shouted.
"In the Wind Temple…" Makar said tiredly.
"Right, onwards to victory!" Link said as he marched off in completely the wrong direction. Makar sighed as he waited for Link to realize this, which didn't happen until a few minutes later. Finally, they were headed in the proper direction, and they soon arrived in a room that had three small, spiky blocks sliding back and forth. To make matters worse, there was a strong gust of wind keeping them from running past these blocks. "Now what?" Link asked the sage, who shrugged, but since he didn't have shoulders, he didn't really do anything.
Link gave a disgusted sigh before picking Makar up and throwing him towards the door that was at the other end of the room. "Go Makar go!" Link shouted, and then laughed happily when Makar came flying back the minute he hit the strong winds. "Do it again!" Link said, clapping happily before throwing Makar again.
"Would you stop that!" Makar shouted as he hid behind a large block that was just sitting there. "Fine," Link said grumpily. "Well, there's only one way to get to the other side!" Link said after awhile.
"I was thinking the same thing! We use these blocks to-" but before the sage could finish Link had grabbed him and was running as fast as he could in his heavy boots. "Oh boy," Makar said nervously as they approached the first spiky block.
"Here we go!" Link shouted cheerfully, only to be hit by the block. He dropped Makar in surprise, sending the little guy all the way back to where they had started. "Stupid plant, get over here!" Link shouted. "Oh forget it, I'll just go without you!" Link said as he watched Makar try to fight the wind and make it to where Link was. Link stomped heavily across the rest of the room, getting hit repeatedly by the blocks. Finally he made it across, only to be blocked by a large slab of rock with arrows on it. "Darn! Makar, I need you! Get over here!" Link shouted.
Somehow Link managed to get the little plant guy across without using the blocks that were there, intended to block the spiky things. "Now, play the song so I can leave!" Link said, sitting down in the grass as he waited. The large rock blew up, this time hitting only Link, as if it had taken pity on the tiny sage. "Stupid rock! I hate rocks!" Link shouted as he stomped inside. A few minutes later and he found himself separated from Makar as, once again, a large door came slamming down behind him. "Are you alright swordsman?" Makar's voice could be heard from the other side.
"I'm fine, stupid plant!" Link turned around to face a giant worm that was staring angrily at him. "Never mind, I'm not fine," Link said before starting his usual tactic (running around and screaming). Finally Link realized that there wasn't going to be a heroic flashlight man that would rescue him this time, so Link decided that he would actually fight this time. Before he could though, the worm started to choke on a large pile of sand. "Aw man, the one time I try to fight!" Link shouted at the worm as it sunk back into the deep sand.
The large doors opened and Makar came running in. He started to play his song before Link even told him to, and soon after Link received yet another painful zap from his sword. "Stupid sword, take that!" Link shouted as he threw it. The sword hit Makar, who then threw his violin at Link, who threw his boomerang, but, as usual, missed his target and got hit instead as the weapon came flying back. Once again Link left Makar on terrible terms, so the little plant refused to stay behind and pray and he went running around the temple to plant his little trees everywhere throughout the rest of Link's adventure.
…Meanwhile, back in the Forsaken Fortress…
"Ahhahahaha, I have complete control over the-"
"Oh shut up already!" Ganondorf shouted, his patience finally gone. He nearly screamed a few seconds later, though, as Aryll shot him an angry glare. "Sorry," he said quickly.
"Fine," Aryll said crossly. "How come your stupid spy didn't work?"
"It's not my fault he choked on the stupid sand!" Ganondorf protested.
"That does it! I'm getting my own spy, and I know just the person," Aryll said, a large grin forming on her face.
I bet you're all wondering who this spy is... well I'm not telling you, because I don't even know yet myself! Muhahahaha!
Um, anyway... thanks for reading, hope you enjoyed it!