"Mom, can I just be alone now?" I ask, my voice shaking.

She nods and leaves me, her eyebrows furrowed in concern. I can only imagine what the look is on my face as he enters the room, passing right by Mom. She doesn't see him, and it's as if he's just another speck of dust in the air. Perhaps he is. Or maybe this is the dream.

Either way, I'm staring at him in horror and he's just got this giant smirk on his face like this is the funniest thing in the world. Only it's not, because I'm freaking out. And I've freaked out before, but not like this. This time, I swear I've lost my mind, because this doesn't happen to normal people. He's glowing white, almost like the moon.

"Derek?" I manage to choke out.

"Hey, princess. Miss me?" Oh God. It is him. From the quirky expression on his face to the leather jacket he was wearing the day of the accident, to the teasing voice that send shivers down my spine.

"What are you?" I ask. Because I've never seen anything like this before. Not in books or movies or plays, unless… I briefly remember Shakespeare's MacBeth. Could it be? Derek's a-

"Honestly, Space Case." he laughs, throwing himself on the bed beside me. I almost scream, but manage to keep my cool. Who am I kidding? Since when is seeing… ghosts keeping it cool? I back up from the glowing figure who I refuse to believe is Derek. "You would think that after 3 years of health classes, you would at least be able to recognize a male when you see one. Or do you need me to demonstrate the section on anatomy again?"

"Der-ek?" But I'm almost curious. If his body is glowing, does that mean his-

"Always the drama queen."

I want to yell at him, because in this situation, who wouldn't be a drama queen? My dead step-brother has somehow reincarnated and is standing next to me as some paranormal spirit that only I can see. Well, Mom can't see him at least. But how can I yell at someone who just got ran over?

This isn't real, I tell myself. This only happens on the sci-fi channel. So I walk past the Derek specter and out the door, hoping that my imagination will come to a halt and I'll stop seeing things.

But it's really hard to ignore something that spouts out random insults at you throughout the entire day.

'So, if I go to sleep, you'll be gone when I wake up, right?'

He's not gone when I awake, though. He's sitting in my desk chair, laughing hysterically when I sit up and stare at him in shock. 'Do you really think you could get rid of me that easily?'

He never leaves me alone. And truthfully, I don't want him to. Because it's almost comforting in a way, to look across the dinner table and see him sitting in that same spot. It's like he never left. And sure, no one else around me can see him, but that means I get him all to myself. Ha. Who would have guessed there would be a day where I craved my own personal Derek?

I wish I could feel for everyone else, but it's hard enough to feel for myself. Marti still calls his name for dinner, and then realizes he's not coming down the stairs. She barely eats, and she's not the happy little girl she was before. She's quiet.

Sometimes I find Edwin in his old room, looking through the hockey cards and just crying his eyes out. I want to wrap him in my arms and tell him to be strong. But I'm scared he'll push me away. I never know with Edwin.

Lizzie is being as tough as ever. I feel as if she holds us all together, like glue. But I look at her and see nothing left in her eyes. No sparkle or shine.

Mom is trying to hold it all in for the benefit of the rest of the family. But at the same time, she's hurting herself. I fear that she's only eating for the baby inside her, and not for herself. She clings to the hope of having another Venturi enter this world. Maybe he or she will be able to fill the void that Derek left us with. But she's only kidding herself. No one can replace Derek.

And George has left us all together. In the mental sense at least. He just carries out every day like it is the same. Eat. Work. Sleep. And he will continue to this. I think George just needs time. Time will heal him.

I don't know if time will heal this wound inside me. I have Derek, in some sense. But it's not the same. He's always by my side, but he's never with me. I can talk to him and he can soothe me in a way.

But it's hard to love something that isn't really there.

"We have to have the funeral soon, George."

"I don't really know if I want a funeral."

"I know this is hard to cope with, but you have to come to terms with it eventually! We have to have a funeral. Abby's flying over from Spain. All of Derek's classmates… how will they ever get the chance to say goodbye?"

"I didn't have a chance to say goodbye."

"God, George! Please just stop being stubborn and selfish for once! This isn't about you! This is about your dead son! Don't you care?"

I walk in on Mom and George's argument. George's face is red and he looks as though he might burst. Mom is almost in tears. I try to back away slowly, but she ropes me in.

"Good timing, Casey!" Derek says sarcastically. I roll my eyes and Mom gives me a reproachful glance. Of course! Derek even gets me in trouble when he's dead.

…His cynical nature has rubbed off on me.

"Casey, sweetie," Mom starts. Oh no. If she's using petnames, that means she wants something from me. "Would you mind doing a eulogy at the funeral? You seem to be coping with this the best out of all of us, and I don't think anyone else would be able to-"

"Sure Mom." I say, before she goes into hysterics. And then I truly realize what I've gotten myself into.

"Thanks, darling." she kisses my forehead, and I hurry away before they start up their argument again.

"Talk about selfish." Derek sighs.

"What do you mean?" I ask him, when we get to the privacy of my bedroom and I've locked the door. I don't want people to find me talking to myself.

"Well, first of all, she gives her teenage daughter the responsibility of writing a eulogy, just because she can't cope with it." He puts the last part in air quotations, and I open my mouth to argue, but he goes on. "Especially since she thought you hated me, so how does she expect you to write something heartfelt?" I hate to admit it, but he has a point. Mom never knew how much I truly… appreciated Derek. No one knew. All they saw were fights and pranks, but we knew. "And just because you aren't having a mental breakdown every day, doesn't mean you're the least affected. I mean, you're the one seeing ghosts. You loony."

I almost laugh for the first time since the accident. "Wooooh!" Derek makes (allegedly) spooky sounds and waves his fingers at me. And I smile, at least.

"Well, if you think the task of writing a eulogy is too hard for me alone, why don't you help?" I learned to smirk from him, and I put it to good use.

"Oh, this should be fun…"

'Think of some of our fondest memories together.'

'Haha, shouldn't be too hard, considering there are so few of those.'

'The day we met. The time you fought Sam over some dumb male code that didn't really exist. Oh, how about when you took me to prom or activated my force field? Or when we danced on national television or studied together? Try to deny it, Derek Venturi, but you've actually had some fun times with me.'

'Yeah right. And compare that to the amount of bad times we've shared.'

He always had to ruin the mood. I never really considered our fights bad, but he got me thinking about all of the horrible things I did to him. Granted, he did prank me practically every day, but he never hurt me out of spite. The only time I was hurt was when I saw him with Kendra or Sally or Emily. And that wasn't on purpose, was it?

Because I dated Truman on purpose. Derek hated it. I could tell he wanted to strangle Truman every time he walked into a room with me. And I kissed him so Derek would pay more attention. But it backfired on me when Derek started going out with Emily.

Emily… she hadn't texted or called since the accident. And I could only guess what she was feeling. Probably guilt. Guilt for fighting with Derek and making him go for the drive that ended his life. But if it wasn't for me dating Truman, none of this would have happened.

And if I learned to tell the truth every once in a while, maybe I could have prevented this.

'Derek, you are the most annoying brother.'

'Step-brother.'

Maybe if I would have told him he was right… If I had just leaned across the table… He would have broken up with Emily. She would have been crushed. But what's worse? An ex-boyfriend, or a dead boyfriend. But instead, I gave up. I gave up on ever being associated with Derek as more than a sister or a friend.

'Same difference.'

'Hey Spacey, you done spacing out yet?'

'Ugh! I'm a terrible person! I'm a lying, conniving bitch!' I collapse onto the bed, holding back the tears that I know are coming.

'I couldn't agree more.' Derek laughs.

And then I can't take it anymore. I dissolve into sobs, letting out everything that has consumed me for so long.

'Oh no. Don't cry! You know I don't deal with emotions well!'

'I lied to you, Derek! You would still be here if it wasn't for me.' I sit up, scanning the room for him, but he is already gone. My tears must have scared him off… or maybe he wasn't even there in the first place.

I curl up into a ball on my bed. My stomach hurts and my head is throbbing.

I fall asleep praying that he'll return to me.

AN: AH! I'm SO sorry it took me so long to update! I hope you liked this chapter! Sorry if there are any grammar mistakes. It's 1 am here! Just let me know and I'll fix it. Review if you so please. Remember to check out Emily's vid if you haven't done so! And I will be responding to everyone who reviewed the prologue ASAP. I love you guys!!! You are all amazing! :D

I will be gone for a week starting Monday… :( Just to let you know so you don't think I died or anything! :D I promise to update as soon as I can though!