Salvation

Chapter 7

Five orns later and still Skyfire wished he had been able to blindly trust his smaller microscope friend when he had said he had tripped into a cliff.

He'd known Perceptor was lying, and he'd been worried – why couldn't the truth be told? Was he being blackmailed by another Autobot? - so, when he saw the red-bodied scientist slip otherwise unnoticed from the Ark, it had been Skyfire's natural reaction to follow him, to make sure that everything was all right...

Oh, if only he hadn't been so concerned!

Whatever he had expected, to see Starscream and Perceptor together, joined on the ground in a secluded forest some few Earth miles away, on the other side of the city, was more shocking than anything that could have crossed his mind. At first, the shuttle had thought to shout out, to try and chase Starscream away when he had seen Perceptor knocked to the floor and viciously attacked – but something had told him to stay hidden, to keep watching; there had to be a reason that Perceptor would come out to be beaten up by a Decepticon...

He thought his energon pumps had stopped when the two before him kissed.

At first he'd found himself panicking, almost hoping that it was hostile, because he could save Perceptor if it was not consensual... and the sight of his old love kissing someone else made his power converter wrench sickeningly. It certainly seemed that it was not mutual; after all, Perceptor's hands were still by his sides and he was rigid under the jet, there was a chance that it really was an attack – but then the microscope had moaned and his optics had dimmed as he relaxed. There was no mistaking that expression of pleasure on his face as Starscream initiating a spark-bonding.

And then Starscream had looked up, and his blazing red optics, brighter than they ever were back on Cybertron, had met unashamedly with Skyfire's disbelieving blue. Skyfire's energon converter lurched again as an exhilarated grin swept over the dark face and the microscope beneath the Decepticon officer called the flier's name heatedly.

Seeing that, Skyfire hadn't been able to stay any longer. He'd stumbled back a few paces and transformed hurriedly, retreating back to the Ark, feeling dirty and intrusive and, above all, somehow betrayed. When Perceptor had come back, over a cycle later, he had barely been able to look at his microscope friend.

It was selfish and hypocritical, he knew that – what claim had he on Starscream, as the one who had told the Decepticon he could no longer see eye to eye with him? He was the one who had ended their love; he'd even gone one step further and defected from his partner's faction. Not only that, he'd shot Starscream from the sky in a fit of rare anger, sent the Decepticon seeker careening into a wall of ice.

So why did seeing Starscream with Perceptor hurt? Because, despite knowing he did not care for the jet any longer, he had hoped in some stupidly optimistic way that they could work everything out and go back to the way things were? Or was it because Perceptor was a friend and was able to have what he no longer could?

Absently, the white shuttle thought back to when he had asked Perceptor for an overhaul. They'd ended up talking about the past, about the Skyfire and the Starscream that had been and how easy life was on Cybertron. Uncertainly, Skyfire cycled air through his vents in frustration – had Perceptor already been with Starscream then, or had he been seeking the shuttle's permission somehow?

Above it all, there was the slight and nagging worry – what if Perceptor was betraying the Autobots?

Perhaps it wasn't such an absurd thought, despite the fact that, prior to this orn, Skyfire would have sworn to anyone that asked that he trusted the other scientist with his life. After all, the microscope had seemed more on edge than usual at Vesuvius, and, though the chance of a Decepticon ambush should have been extremely slim, he had kept urging caution and glancing to the skies. And the Decepticons had attacked, hadn't they?

On the other hand, Megatron had seemed to target Perceptor specifically in that attack, shooting up the backs of his red legs badly enough to cripple him, sending him crashing to the ground where he had just lain motionless, limp and unable to defend himself. The silver tyrant was almost on top of the fallen microscope when Skyfire had rammed him out of the air and gathered up his helpless friend. Surely the Decepticons would take better care of their informants...?

Urgh, there was nothing to be gained by speculating without proof – he could make no judgements until he had heard what Perceptor had to say in his defence. Perhaps there was something he was missing.

Reasonable minded and fair-handed, despite the sense of betrayal that hung over him like the darkest storm cloud, Skyfire resolved that he would seek out his microscope friend and at least ask what in the name of the primary program was going on.

O

There was that same small distracted smile, the one that Perceptor almost always wore when Skyfire saw him these days. Disturbingly, the shuttle found himself considering wiping that expression from the pale face. He quashed the rising anger before it could run away with him.

"Perceptor?" The microscope stopped still, half-turning at the white shuttle's hallo. Beckoning his smaller friend into one of the many small storage compartments that opened onto one of the corridors leading away from the main bridge, as he had no wish to be disturbed when the conversation would likely be awkward anyway, Skyfire let his face stay sombre and drawn.

"Everything all right?" Asked the red Autobot, the expression on his face slightly bemused as Skyfire closed the door behind him and leaned against the wall tiredly.

"You're looking quite beat up." Skyfire stated, dimming his optics, completely unsure of how to word himself but resolute that he would find out the truth. Somewhere, he wondered why he was so affected by this – would he have felt slighted to the same extent if it had not been Starscream that Perceptor chose...?

"Haha, yes, battle damage... I haven't got around to straightening it out yet." Now that he was suspicious, Skyfire realised that the laugh did seem rather forced. Perceptor was running his hands over the opposite forearms somewhat self-consciously, not quite managing to meet the other scientist's optics. Heh... the red-bodied microscope had always been a terrible liar.

"When was the last time you were in a battle, Perceptor?"

The smaller robot's sky-blue optics widened. He stumbled over his words. "I – uh, I –"

"It's not battle damage at all, is it?" Voice carefully devoid of emotion, Skyfire dropped his metaphorical bomb. "It was caused by Starscream, wasn't it?"

And the emotions that flashed through Perceptor's optics were most revealing – among the shock and confusion was a distinct vision of panic, of terror, no matter how hard the smaller mech tried to hide it.

"St-Starscream?" He stuttered, hedging wildly, looking for any possible verbal escape route while noting that Skyfire was between him and the door, blocking his fleeing. "N-no! ... Is this a joke? Why in the name of – why would Starscream want to –"

Glaring at the wall, both irritated and saddened that Perceptor still would not trust him with the truth as well as that he was being lied to at all, Skyfire's deep grumble cut across the pathetic stammering. "There's no point lying to me, I saw you with him a few orns ago."

For a moment, it was all the normally excessively-eloquent Perceptor could do to mouth wordlessly, unable to meet Skyfire's eyes with his own. For that moment, Skyfire was silent, hating that he needed to carry out such an interrogation, but hating too that he felt so betrayed by this whole affair and unable to shake the worry that Perceptor was selling the Autobots to their enemies.

"You love him." It wasn't a question rather than a dull statement, but Skyfire watched the smaller scientist as though expecting an answer. Finally, Perceptor managed to look him in the eye.

"There's no love in this."

It seemed as though the microscope was resigning himself to the inescapable questioning, becoming braver and more confident by the instant. Skyfire envied him for that ability; it was taking all his self-control to keep his voice from wavering.

"I watched you spark-bonding." He admitted. Perceptor's expression was suddenly rather drawn, like he was trying his hardest to keep it unreadable. Skyfire kept going. "You must love each other."

A slight shake of the pale head. "There's no love in this."

Narrowing his optics slightly, Skyfire realised that there was no point pursuing that line of thought, as he was only getting the same repeated answer. Instead he tried another way, still not asking questions but giving bland statements and letting Perceptor speak in his own defence – but all he got in return were quiet responses, as equally blank in deliverance as his own.

"You let him hit you."

"I'm not big enough to stop him."

"You could have stayed away from him in the first place if it was that much of a bother. Perhaps you're giving the enemy information about us. Perhaps you told them we would be in Italy when we were."

"I – I'm not – I didn't –"

Here Perceptor cut himself off, confusion showing on his face, and looked at the floor. He began to nip at his lower lip, something that Skyfire recognised as a nervous tic – one of the microscope's many compulsive habits that shone through his expressive body when he was uncomfortable or excited. Knowing he had found an opening and would likely now receive intelligible answers, the shuttle kept probing, despite his friend's discomfort.

"I don't believe you." Stated the white researcher, his spark sinking in his chest even as he spoke the words. Somehow, he had hoped that, even though the discovery of the two of them together had upset him, Perceptor was still loyal to their beliefs. Now the chance of treachery was looking depressingly large.

Shaking his head, the red-and-turquoise Autobot spread his hands in a desperate appeal. "It's not like that..."

"He's a Decepticon. He spends his orns trying to kill us. Why go out to him if you're not selling us out?"

"We're spark-bonded, Skyfire, I have to..."

"Why engage in such a thing if you didn't love him!?" Snapped the usually-patient shuttle, instantly regretting his loss of control when he saw Perceptor flinch and hold his own elbows tightly, turning his gaze down to the floor.

He didn't even know why he'd lost his near-limitless patience in those astroseconds. Perhaps it was because Perceptor was talking about the one connection that Skyfire had once longed to share with Starscream as callously as though it were nothing but an unwanted burden.

Exhaling a great ventful of waste air, Skyfire tried again, his tone more gentle this time. "Is he blackmailing you?"

At this suggestion, Perceptor frowned, looking quite offended. "Do you really think so little of me? I'm not a helpless sparkling. I know full well what I'm doing."

"Then what are you doing? Because at the moment I see no reason why I should not call Prime or Prowl in here and tell them of your consorting with an enemy officer"

"It's innocent, I swear it, I would never betray my friends! Skyfire, please believe me." If he watched his smaller friend carefully, he could see, barely there but just visible, the slight trembling of his limbs as he pleaded his innocence.

"Why else would you meet a Decepticon?"

"..." Nibbling at his lip as though it would help him think, Perceptor took a moment. When he spoke, he spoke slowly, as though he was still working the answer out in his head even as it fell from his lips. "I'm going to someone who needs me."

"Starscream?" Heavy disbelief carried in the tone, Skyfire knowing full well how independent Starscream liked to think himself to be.

In response, Perceptor shrugged uncomfortably, poking his index fingers together before giving any verbal reply. "Well, you know... It's nice to be needed for something other than my intelligence. I mean, I'm not good at social and I'm not a warrior. I love learning, I do, but... well, it's like Brawn said. Where am I when you're all fighting? Sometimes I'm being useful." When he saw Skyfire about to interject, he held up his grey hands. "No, let me finish – Starscream, he... he just seems to want someone there. I don't think he cares if it's me or not, or if I talk to him or even if I listen. Just... whether he's overloading off me or telling me his troubles, he wants me to just be there. I can do that."

"You underestimate yourself." Skyfire observed curtly, the only answer he could think to give to the microscope's awkward and babbled derogatory introspection.

"Haha, you think so?" A smile, an amused shake of the head. "That's the best way I can think of to rationalise it, I'll probably change my mind again next breem and think of another reason. It's all so complicated. I'm still trying to work out the half of it myself..." Then the smaller robot seemed to remember that Skyfire was upset with him. "I – I mean –"

His taller friend cut him off suspiciously – but he seemed to have accepted the garbled and utterly inadequate explanation for why Perceptor would agree to meet a violent and erratic harbinger of destruction. "What about Italy? You knew that the Decepticons would attack, didn't you?"

"Yes." Again Perceptor looked at the floor, hiding his face somewhat. His voice was quiet, barely audible. "Starscream told me that, that Megatron knew the expedition would go ahead. He was – uhm, he was worried about me I think."

"He wasn't at the raid." Skyfire pointed out coolly, his disbelief obvious.

"Megatron found out about... about, uh, us somehow." The soft-spoken microscope looked back up into his taller friend's glowing azure eyes, which seemed almost to flicker in something – concern? Pity? - when he spoke his next words: "Starscream was... incapacitated... oh Primus, Skyfire, please don't tell anyone about this, especially not – not Jazz, or Prowl..."

"Hmm? Why not? They should be informed. It's quite the potential security breach." He didn't know why he said it. He certainly hadn't meant to – making other mechs suffer, especially those he considered his friends, was not his idea of amusement. But somewhere he still knew that there was the possibility of treachery. "Scared they might think you're a traitor?"

Perceptor didn't even need to think about his answer. "No, I'm not scared they'll accuse me of betraying the Autobots. I want this war to end and the Decepticons to vanish as much as any of us. But... if anyone finds out, they'll all assume that I'm being tricked into this – just like you did. I can't bear the thought of people thinking so little of me. I'm not a naïve youngling any more, I know exactly what I'm doing. It's my decision. I'll accept any punishment I deserve, but to have everyone think I am weak and stupid... that would be unbearable."

A long silence followed, far too long to be comfortable. The smaller of the two occupants of the storage facility began to shuffle awkwardly, shifting his weight from foot to foot and glancing at the door almost longingly every now and again. In contrast, Skyfire was silent and still, gazing blankly at nothing as he worked through things in his mind.

So far, everything made sense... sort of. He understood as much as was possible to – not that that was much. How Perceptor could love someone like Starscream (because he surely would not consent to spark-bond with someone he did not love, despite how many times he claimed otherwise) was simply not understandable - and Starscream himself never engaged in any activity unless there was something in it for him. What was he gaining from this to continue it...? Was Perceptor really giving him information? Or was it that the jet viewed the meek microscope as easy sex?

And then the memory of the circuit examination, of that painfully honest talk when he had spilled out his spark, laid it bare before the smaller scientist, bubbled to the surface of his recall banks again, plunging him back into his cold mood.

"Back when you gave me that overhaul and asked me about my relationship with Starscream," he started bitterly, "were you already bonded then, or were you wanting to know if I still cared for him before you went through with it?"

Whatever response Skyfire expected, Perceptor's sad smile caught him completely by surprise.

"We were together before that." The microscope's voice was almost quiet enough to be a whisper. "Since I was a Decepticon prisoner..."

"What?" And Skyfire found himself frowning in confusion. Some part of him began to suspect... but he didn't want to listen to it. He didn't want to believe it. "But Starscream – he was the one who tortured you, wasn't he? That's what I was told."

"Yes, that's right..." Again the smaller of the two looked uncomfortable, memories that were hazy but exceedingly unpleasant teasing at his subconscious no matter how hard he tried to quell them.

An odd sense of indignation bubbled in the shuttle's white chest, mixing in swirls with the sickening theory he was trying to deny. Could his impression of Perceptor's pacifism have been so wrong? Or had Cybertronian law been breached so blatantly? He had thought that his smaller friend hated pain and death in all their forms, and Starscream... but how he hoped that it was a mutual partnership. "How could – how could you fall for someone like that!"

And Perceptor shrugged, ducking under Skyfire's arm to get to the door now that his taller friend was not trying to prevent his leaving.

"Like I said, there's no love in this bond." Fleetingly, an expression of awkward uncertainty flickered over the white face before he reached for the door and made to leave. Skyfire caught him by the arm even as his energon processor lurched, leaving a sick taste of stale energon in his mouth.

"Hold it," he commanded quietly, pulling Perceptor back firmly, "I'm not convinced. You haven't given me a single straight answer. Why should I take your word for it that this isn't a breach of security? You're disobeying protocol. I should report you."

Turning his head away, Perceptor tensed his shoulders, his voice barely audible when he spoke. "That's your decision to make."

"Come on, I was honest with you. Time to repay that."

But Perceptor shook his head. "I don't want to talk about it. I'm... sorry. It's not easy for me. Please, Skyfire, if you don't trust me then I can't make you believe that I'm not betraying you – but it was never my intention to hurt any of my friends. Never."

In a surprising display of strength for one of his build, Perceptor wrenched his arm from the larger mech's grasp and disappeared out of the small room, away down the corridor. Skyfire did not think to give chase, seeing the hurt on the microscope's face, knowing the cause of it and still suspecting...

Not for the first time, he wished that he had the ability to blindly trust his red-bodied friend.

O

"You left without my permission again, didn't you!?"

"No." Starscream sneered, at total ease leaning against a berth where he should have been standing to attention. His irate master wheeled on him furiously.

"No!? Then who raised the docking tower, you Pit-spawned incompetent?"

"Probably that idiot Skywarp. He likes to go out and shoot at the aquatic lifeforms." Lied the air commander smoothly, relaxing further as his leader raged.

One of the black hands fisted compulsively; Megatron was obviously itching for something to take his frustrations out on. "Go and inform all your worthless seekers that they're confined to barracks until further notice! Nothing happens without my permission, understand?"

Starscream, the epitome of disobedience, could not help mocking his lord. "Permission to leave and tell my squadron of your orders, o' mighty Megatron?"

Megatron hit him a hard uppercut to the chin, sending his head smashing back into the wall. The silver gun-transformer glared as his officer slid to the floor.

"I will not tolerate insubordination!"

Rubbing his chin as he manoeuvred himself into a sitting position, Starscream smirked up at the stronger Decepticon. "What's the matter? Can't you control your army any more?"

His words died to nothing in his vocaliser as Megatron began repeatedly kicking him in the neck. Stopping only when the impacts began to hurt his foot, the tyrant stared down at his lieutenant in disgust.

"Starscream," he growled with measured calm, lip curling in distaste at the seeker's energon spattered up his leg, "either you do as I say without questioning me, or I will personally see to it that that Autobot of yours is murdered. Understand me?"

"Keh, why should I care about what happens to some fool Autobot?" Was the murderous jet's hoarse reply, the words thick and unsteady, one hand coming up to massage his throat gently.

Before he could rub the tender metal, however, Megatron had grasped him by the neck and hauled him from the ground in one hand, bringing their faces uncomfortably close. The air commander only resisted the urge to bite at his hated master because he knew the retribution would hurt.

"I've heard that losing a bondmate is the most painful thing any Transformer can undergo. I've never seen it happen myself. I'd simply love to give it a try, though." While Megatron's tone was mocking, his fiery red eyes were steely cold; he was deadly serious.

Starscream tried to sneer or smirk, just to give Megatron the impression that he was not afraid, but he could not hide the possessive anger that welled within him. Contemptuously, he turned his head away from his leader in a sign of his submission, though swearing to himself that he would, one day, best Megatron – without getting Perceptor killed in the meantime.