Chapter 7
When Blair and Serena made it back to their suite, the two girls went through the motions of getting ready for bed. Both washed their faces. Although, there wasn't much make up left on either of the beauties after the sob fest that occurred on the way home. After brushing their teeth, there was a silent agreement that the girls would sleep together that night. They hadn't done that since they were ten or eleven, but that was what each of them needed the most...love and comfort that only a best friend can give. No words were spoken, but the two girls' hands were clasped all night. That was enough. After a few hours, Blair could tell that Serena's breathing became heavy. She knew her best friend had finally dozed off. Blair's restless, chocolate eyes never shut that night. She laid their in bed, contemplating the mystery of her newly- "re"found companionship with Chuck. Things between them were going...surprisingly well considering all that had happened in the last couple of months, and then BAM...Another shot at the heart by that basshole! The nerve of him to make her feel as if it was her fault that he didn't contact anyone from home after getting shot! Blair was so angry at him. "Agh! If I could just lay my hands on him. This time it wouldn't be a slap to the face, rather a stiff punch to that arrogant nose of his!" Blair lay there, still fuming over his decision to shut everyone that mattered out of his life. She couldn't help but feel sorry for herself too. She knew that he had changed. She knew that-as soon as she saw his face light up with an honest to goodness smile across the street of Dior. She thought that maybe he could be the man she always dreamed of deserving in her life. This proved her wrong though. He was still the same ole' Chuck...despite the way he may be "acting."
When the first light of the morning beamed in through the windows of the suite, Blair quietly crept out bed. Serena didn't stir. Blair didn't bother showering. After rinsing her face and brushing her teeth, she threw her hair up in a messy bun, put on a simple, cotton dress, and stepped into her gladiator sandals. She wasn't in New York, and nobody knew her here. She wasn't in the mood to "get pretty." She wanted alone time with a latte and a muffin at her favorite local bakery. Despite her need to be with people she loved in desperate times such as these, she found that recently, her best therapy was being alone...letting her mind truly wander...reflecting on this tragedy called life.
As she sat at her favorite table in the corner closest to the street, picking at her muffin and barely sipping her latte, Blair noticed little things about passing couples. She noticed how one couple couldn't keep their hands off of each other. It wasn't that gross PDA type of touching that she loathed in couples, but it was that endearing kind of embrace. The fact that if they weren't holding hands, the man's hand found the small of his lover's back, or as the woman talked with animation, her hand would touch the man's arm excitedly. It was as if they were attracted by magnets. "Ugh! Screw that magnetic force! It got me nowhere!" she wanted to scream a warning at the hopelessly-in-love pair. Another couple walked briskly to the local cinema. They must have been late for their showing based on the pep in their step, and all Blair wanted to point out to them was how boring they must be as a couple. Of course, that was a lie. Blair longed for that type of relationship. As much as she might not like to admit, she wanted it more than anything, but she had just given up on the dream of that true, pure and simple kind of love. It obviously wasn't in the cards for her. However, it was the third and final couple, Blair spied that gave her chills. They sat down at a table near her in the bakery, and she couldn't help but overhear the man repeatedly talking on his cell phone. She could tell from the sound of the calls that they were all business related. When the waitress came to take their order, the man cut her off angrily, "Can't you see I'm on the phone? Can you give us a second or should I see if your employer has more competent help to serve us?" The waitress turned away horrified, but it wasn't the waitress's face that Blair was staring at. No, it was the face of the man's fiance across the table. She watched as the woman frowned, her bottom lip trembling, her eyes never looking up from the table. "Was I that girl with Chuck?" Blair found herself sadly wondering. Blair couldn't help but to continue to watch this couple. After the man's third phone call, he halfheartedly apologized to her, "I'm sorry, baby. You know how important work is right now." The woman's facial expression changed from somber to upbeat with his half ass excuse. "Ugh, you have to be kidding me!" Blair silently pleaded with the girl to stand up for herself. Couldn't she see what an ass she was with! Blair couldn't help but listen harder to the two's conversation that followed. "You remember that Mother and Father want us over for dinner tonight, right? My grandmother is in town, and well, it's been forever since I last saw her...probably since Papere's funeral. It will be great to catch up! I've missed her so much!" the woman's eyes radiated as she reminded her fiance about their dinner plans. "You know I won't be able to attend, Rose." he stated condescendingly. "I'm having drinks with some of the men on the board tonight. My new business proposal will go over much smoother with their full support. This is something I can't afford to miss out on." Beep! Blair heard the man's phone sound once again. He rose from the table. "If you'll excuse me, I'll just be a second. This is the president of the board now. I'll be back, and if that idiot of a waitress comes back, I'll just have a coffee." He abruptly removed himself from the table, and even though Blair Waldorf was quite the conspicuous spy in her past, it seems she was staring sadly at the woman without even realizing. As the woman made eye contact with Blair, she smiled nervously. Blair quickly looked away, embarrassed for being caught listening in on such a horrid one-sided conversation between the couple. After a few seconds, Blair couldn't help but look back, and what she saw was empowering. No, the woman, merely a stranger in a bakery, didn't realize what an affect she had on Blair. Blair stared at the empty table. All that was left was an engagement ring. Blair couldn't help herself. She had cried all the tears she could for Chuck Bass, and this woman's self-love and respect for herself was contagious. As her own phone sounded, Blair Waldorf smiled, the truest of smiles, for the first time since last night's horrid happenings.
Just spotted: C and E at the train station in downtown Paris...Looks like C is all packed for his worldly travels, and E looks like a lady in love. Wonder what B think's about C's baggage? More importantly, where's C going? Will S and B really bid him farewell...for good?
XOXO Gossip Girl
"You bet, your ass, I'll bid him farewell," Blair said out loud to nobody but herself. Watching "the old Blair" through a stranger's relationship was enlightening. God, if she would have stayed with Chuck, surely eventually he would have proposed. She loved him enough to say yes. She'd want to please him. Ugh, she couldn't imagine a life with him loving his work more than her...always putting everything before her. It's amazing that it took something as heroic as what she just witnessed in the stranger named Rose for her to truly understand what she deserved. Yes, Blair Waldorf deserved a lot. She deserved more than what Chuck Bass was ever willing to give her, and coming to that realization left her feeling hopeful and determined to find what she was looking for. She knew what she deserved, and she wouldn't settle for less in the future.
As Blair's moment of empowerment continued to seep through her entire being, radiating even her soul it seemed, Serena plopped herself at the table beside Blair. "B, I can't believe you didn't leave me a note or anything. I was worried." Blair smiled at her best friend, and she wasn't surprised to see Serena with a look of honest confusion on her face. Serena probably thought Blair would be suicidal by morning knowing of what Chuck Bass did...or in his case, didn't do. He didn't tell his family...his friends...his Blair about being nearly killed. Blair should be furious still, but Serena didn't witness what Blair just had. Just as Blair was about to tell her what she had realized about her life, Serena cut her off. "B, listen. It's not important where you are. I knew you'd be here. You've been obsessed with this bakery ever since we got here, and I can't blame you. Why not eat carbs? We're on vacation after all, but none of that is important right now! Did you get the GG blast?" Serena was gasping for air by this point. Blair didn't realize it before, but Serena's forehead and neck were drenched in sweat. She must have sprinted the whole way over from the suite. "Yes, S. I got the blast, and I'm okay. So what if Chuck is going away to "happily ever after" with his precious Eva? Let him go, S. I'M OKAY. I just had the most enlightening experience of my..." Serena cut off her best friend again. "Blair, this is important. You have to listen to me. We know Chuck. We know Chuck better than little miss Eva ever will, and we know what he does. He runs." Blair interjected. "Yes, S. When life is scary, Chuck runs. Everyone knows that. It's nothing new." Serena jumped right back, "But, B, he's different now. If he runs this time, what does he have to come running back to? He feels he has nothing! We can't let him do this. I'm scared we'll lose him forever." Blair wanted to argue with Serena. She wanted to tell her she didn't care how long Chuck Bass ran or who he ran with. Serena's next words changed her mind though. Serena was her best friend. Of course she knew Blair's every weakness. "He could have died, B...in Prague that night. We would have never had a chance to right any wrongs...to tell him we loved him despite his mistakes. We might have never seen him again. Now that we know he's okay, and that God gave him a second chance...that God gave us all a second chance, we can't let him fade away from us again. I couldn't bare it, and if you dig down deep into the soul I know you have, I know you couldn't bare it either. Blair, please. We have to stop him before he gets on that train. Please." Serena's voice quavered as she plead with her best friend to help her get Chuck back. Blair swallowed hard, and she nodded her head intently. She knew that she couldn't live her life knowing that she didn't help Serena find him. She'd be fooling herself to pretend it was all for Serena though. After "seeing" hers and Chuck's relationship played out for her today, she knew it was officially over between them. She would demand more out of her next relationship. She loved herself enough to want more. However, she couldn't fool herself. When she told Chuck the night before that she'd always be his family, she meant it. She needed him in her life, and for some reason she couldn't shake, she thought he still needed her...maybe now more than ever. "Let's go catch that Bass!" Blair grabbed her best friend's hand, and the two quickly ran out of the bakery into the open street. Waving frantically for a cab, Blair just hoped they weren't too late.