Title: Define My Pain

By: Aina Song

Fandom(s): YYH/FF8 Crossover

Genre: Yaoi

Rating: NC-17

Warning(s): Language; Angst; Blood - Possibly some Saap, if I can manage it.

Pairing(s): Yusuke/Squall; implied Hiei/Kurama

Reviews: Yes, please.

Author's Note: Standard Disclaimer. This story was not written for money. Italics= dreams, and such.

Teaser: He didn't know what he needed… Until it found him.

Chapter Five - Ever Done Otherwise?

Once the room stopped spinning, Squall glanced down to discover the mess he had left all over his pillow and sheets. He felt Yusuke's chest press up against his back as the dark youth peered over his shoulder. He could almost feel Yusuke's slow smile. "You're not gonna want to sleep with that."

"No."

"How ya gonna hide it from Seifer?"

At that, Squall could not help but give a small smile of his own. "I suspect this is what he intended when he left the room empty."

Yusuke's laugh was a deep rumble against Squall's back. "He knew? I didn't think I was that obvious." Then he stretched a bit to look around Squall toward Seifer's bed. "Think he'd mind it if you borrowed his sheets?"

"Probably, but it wouldn't matter." He turned his head to lock Yusuke's gaze with his own, "I won't be sleeping here, tonight."

Yusuke's stare quickly became a look of devious satisfaction. "You fixin' to spend the night with me?"

~o~

Too dark.

The blood escaping her chest was far too dark.

It stained Squall's hands as he tried applying pressure to stop the bleeding. His white shirtfront was soaked with it. It dyed the ground beneath them. But it would not stop. It kept coming, growing darker and darker as it spilled out of her.

Just before the blood was more black than red, a hand reached up and gripped his wrist. Squall looked up.

It was Yusuke Urameshi again, smiling up at him with dark brown eyes that were swiftly losing their ferocity. And he was growing very pale. "Hey," he rasped. "Come on. Let me go."

"Never." Squall heard the vow, and realized it had fallen from his own lips.

"This ain't the end," Yusuke promised, his eyelids growing heavy. "Life. D-death. Re-re… birr…"

"No. NO!"

~o~

Yusuke was jarred awake just before dawn when a sudden spike of energy bombarded his senses. He opened his eyes, but lay absolutely still. He didn't have to send his senses wide for the source. It was lying right beside him, emanating from the body that had entangled itself into his embrace sometime during the night.

Squall Leonhart's aura was awakening.

And even while Yusuke's head was still reeling with the meaning behind such a discovery, his new lover suddenly flinched in his sleep. Yusuke lifted up on his elbow, shaking Squall by the shoulder. "Hey," he breathed. "Come on. Wake up."

With a jolt and a hiss for air, Squall's hauntingly blue eyes flew open. He stared up toward the ceiling for several seconds before lifting his head and glancing around. "Yusuke..?"

The dark youth offered a small smile. "There you are. Welcome back."

"What happened? Where am I?"

Yusuke's smile slowly disappeared. "You're in bed. With me, remember? And I think you were having a nightmare."

Squall nodded, dropping his head again to Yusuke's arm with a heavy sigh.

"Having regrets?"

He quickly turned his head to stare at Yusuke. But Yusuke Urameshi had been lied to once before. He preferred the truth, always. "Squall. Do you regret what happened?"

His new lover was quiet a moment longer. Then, "No. I wanted you, tonight. Just as obviously as you wanted me. But I…"

"Can't stop thinkin' about her?"

Squall glanced away, nodding.

"What was her name?"

"Rinoa Heartilly." He took a steadying breath, "A stray bullet from an enemy soldier pierced her lung. I was there in time to hold her in my arms as she died."

Yusuke bit off a torrid profanity, stretching out again to pull Squall back against his chest. He held Squall tight against him, silently pooling his black energy out so that it may encompass them both. With a whisper to hush Squall's curiosity, Yusuke kept his energy flowing from one to the other and back again, taking Squall's pain and breaking it apart, letting it be shared between them before returning it to Squall's heart in the form it was meant to be.

Not guilt.

Grief.

Yusuke then pooled his energy once more into Squall, filling that heart with his silent understanding and wordlessly asking that his comfort be accepted. The stoic swordsman shook once in his arms, before finally giving in and releasing the tears that had never yet been allowed to flow. Yusuke whispered soothingly into Squall's ear while the other mourned at last, quietly reclaiming his energy back into himself.

When both fell asleep once more, it was the slumber of secrets shared and newfound peace.

~o~

Seifer Almasy awoke late that morning in the marble room. He lifted his head with a sour groan, stretching his stiff back muscles. Sitting down to rest the night before after hours of training had been a decent enough idea. Falling asleep with his back to the wall had not.

"Get up."

Seifer tilted his head back. And he stared. Standing some paces away, wearing faded jeans and a tee-shirt the shade of a dark purple bruise he had obviously borrowed from Yusuke, Squall Leonhart glared down at him. But more surprising than the clothes was the light that had finally returned to his chalk-blue eyes.

A slow, crooked smirk slid across Seifer's mouth. "About time."

"Get up," Squall repeated in answer.

The blond stood. "Where's Urameshi?"

"Looking for the doorway that might lead us home. He said he could be gone all day." Squall stepped back, lifting the Revolver in his hand. "Which leaves me the chance to properly 'thank' you for last night."

Laughing, Seifer leaned down to take his Hyperion into his grip.

"Your welcome."

~o~

High up on one of the ceiling's support beams, watching as the two humans attacked each other, Kurama smiled. "He seems to have rediscovered his spirit," the redhead whispered, glancing to his right. "What is your opinion?"

Kneeling beside him, Hiei scowled down at Squall Leonhart. "Fox. His aura has shifted."

"What?" Kurama quickly looked down a second time. But then he gave a small smile, "So there's more to him than meets the eye."

The fire demon nodded. "I had my doubts. I wondered what Yusuke had seen in him."

"And, now?"

"Now I have no reason to wonder."

Kurama smiled again, "Then you approve?"

Hiei narrowed his eyes of red garnet, watching Squall drive Seifer back with as much fervor as he had done with Yusuke that first day. Here was the creature that had drawn their bond-brother's blood. Hiei's scowl grew less determined, and he grudgingly gave a nod of his head.

"I approve."

~o~

Yusuke's heart suddenly felt like a cold lead weight, pressing down toward his stomach.

Moments before, he had felt a sense of elation. Finally, the path had been revealed which led directly into Squall's world. He had only to mention the word "Garden" to a random passerby, and it was as though he had asked the sixty-billion dollar question. He had been given directions to the nearest one which, for some reason, had been several miles away and near the mountains.

Yusuke had been about to discover for himself the reason behind the great importance Squall had hinted to when mentioning the concept of Gardens. Perhaps one of the deepest aspects to learn and explore about his new lover, a thought which had excited him. Now he felt the world grow cold around him.

No two walls stood together, and stone debris lay scattered across broken ground. It was obvious that any start at reconstruction had been abandoned long ago. A live explosive seemed embedded amongst the stones, and a small makeshift cemetery lay just beyond the debris.

This was not the military legend Yusuke had imagined.

Did Squall know of this? Yusuke did not want to bring his new lover home to a world of disappointment.

And that thought seized his heart and nearly stole his next breath. He did not want to bring Squall to this world. Nor to any world that did not include Yusuke. Yes, he had spent the past week searching for a way to lead Squall Leonhart home. But now he knew himself weak.

Yusuke Urameshi, that dark prince among demons, had done the unthinkable. He had severed his own heart, and had surrendered it to another…

~o~

In Genkai's temple garden, a sudden pang struck within Kurama's chest. The red-haired fox threw his arm out to catch his hand to the low garden wall as he fell to his knee with the echo of the impact. He did nothing to forbid the tears that sprang to his emerald green eyes.

"Oh, Yusuke…"

Hiei had felt it, too. He had collapsed to both knees, and now fell forward upon his hands. A single tear escaped his fiery red eyes and fell to the grass, where it hardened into a tiny black bauble. He swore, taking the gem and crushing it in his fist. Shimmering dust spilled between his fingers.

With a shared glance, the two demons rose shakily to their feet. Kurama's eyes were filled with worry. "I hadn't felt anything like that from him for some time…"

Hiei's frown betrayed his own concern. "Not since that bitch stabbed him in the back."

"Language, Hiei," The red-haired youth reprimanded automatically, though he shared his lover's opinion of that particular woman. He sighed, "What will he do?"

"What he believes is right." The koorime swore again, tossing the last of the shimmering black dust from his hand. "When has he ever done otherwise?"