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A Little LoVe, A Little Kiss

Veronica made lists. Questions she wanted to ask the doctor about her dad's recovery. Items she needed to bring with her for the upcoming road trip to Vegas. Things she planned to do over the summer. Steps she needed to take to close her few remaining open cases. Movies she missed at the theater and wanted to rent on DVD.

Veronica made lists so she could ignore what was going on around her. Over the past year she'd grown accustomed to the unwanted attention she drew from her fellow students, most who had never spoken to her, but still held distinct opinions about her and her life. At least, she thought she was accustomed to it. What she failed to remember was the intensity of those first few days after her dad was thrown out of office. When the insults were original so she hadn't yet developed a standard come back. When the scrutiny radiating from people's eyes hadn't been diminished by the intrusion of their own problems. When the scandal was fresh and new and people were salivating for juicy bits of gossip. When everything that was said ripped into wounds that hadn't had time to heal.

Veronica made lists to distract her mind from thinking about Logan. It seemed a public make-out session between two of Neptune Highs most notorious archenemies scored high on the gossip meter. They'd managed to get their books out of their lockers and make it to Clemmons office before the insults started again, but Veronica knew it wouldn't last. If the comments getting thrown at Logan were anything like what was getting thrown at her - and they had to be just as bad if not worse; it was high school after all - he was going to lose control of his temper. He only had a tentative grasp on to begin with. Pushed too far, the warnings he'd received from her and her dad wouldn't mean a thing. If he wasn't suspended for fighting by the end of the day, it would be a miracle.

Veronica made lists because Duncan wasn't being forced to go through this along side them. Wallace was in the office when Jake Kane made the call to Clemmons, and her best friend passed along the news of Duncan's absence for the rest of the week. It was such a typical Kane move. She was sure Celeste was already forcing pills down Duncan's throat, turning him into a zombie again in an attempt to protect him. Did Veronica want to be in school? No. But her dad was right. Her and Logan had to get it over with at some point; the sooner the better. So no, she wasn't jealous that Duncan got to stay home. She was pissed! They were taking the brunt of it, her and Logan, and Duncan would slide in next week long after the dust settled. It was cowardly and she was disappointed in him. Just like she was disappointed in how he broke-up with her the year before. And disappointed in how he pulled the same stunt with Meg. And disappointed that in the past three days he hadn't made one phone call to check on her, or her dad, or Logan. She'd left him a message on his cell Sunday night and he had yet to call her back.

Veronica made lists because she was worried. She didn't know what Dick said to Logan that morning to upset him. She didn't know why Weevil found it necessary to put the PCHers on stand-by. She didn't know how long it would take for her dad to fully recover from his injuries. She didn't know where her mother had run off to this time. She didn't know when Dick would start asking questions about that night. She didn't know how much more Logan could take before he completely broke. She didn't know how many more nights she'd close her eyes to find herself locked in a freezer with flames surrounding her. She didn't know if she could put Lilly's memory to rest and finally move on with her life.

--- VVV

When the bell rang signally the end of morning classes and her escape to lunch, Veronica was relieved. She approached her locker, mentally making a list of the books she'd need for afternoon classes. When an arm snaked around her waist, she flinched and pulled away before she realized who it was.

Logan stared down at her, his face a mixture of hurt and confusion. "What? I'm not allowed to touch you in public?"

"I think you got the answer to that question earlier," Veronica teased him. She took his arm and settled it back in place around her, then gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. "I'm a little jumpy, that's all."

Logan pulled her closer as they walked the additional five feet to her locker. His morning hadn't been any better than hers. For the majority of the student body it was open season on Logan Echolls. To distance himself from the insults and comments, he started assigning points. The more creative, the more points. He used a one-to-ten scale, and so far the highest score was a six. It saddened him to realize the lack of originality and style in his fellow classmates. "But you're okay, right? No one's said anything too far out-of-line?"

Veronica heard Logan's concern, but she also heard an edge of displeasure and decided it was time for a half-truth. The last thing she wanted was Logan getting angry on her behalf. "I traded barbs with you for over a year, pretty boy. This is amateur hour. When someone says something worth remembering, I'll let you know." She dialed her combination and opened the locker. "What about you? Anything memorable to report?"

Logan played with the hem of the back of her shirt. "It's been fairly tame." And that was an understatement. The rest of the student body might be reveling in Logan's current situation, but as Dick had predicted, the '09ers were being uncharacteristically silent. Out of all the slings and arrows shot his way, not one had come from his friends. They might laugh at something said, but they weren't initiating the ridicule. He wished they'd just start already; the anticipation was killing him. He needed a distraction. Thankfully, his favorite distraction was right in front of him. He slid his hands around her waist. "And I haven't come close to hitting anyone. I think I deserve a reward," he whispered in her ear.

"We talked about this yesterday. Personal satisfaction. That should be reward enough." Veronica tried to appear unaffected, but it was all a lie. She felt the weight of his chest pressed against her back, the strength of his fingers through the cotton of her shirt, and a warm glow spread through her entire body. It happened every time Logan touched her. Humans were meant to be touched, and she'd been alone for too long. She didn't realize how desperately she'd missed it until it was given so freely. Given so freely by a man who could too easily associate touch with memories of abuse. Of course she'd never tell Logan, because she knew he'd twist it around until all he heard was pity in her words. But it wasn't pity, never pity. Buried beneath the snark and the anger was a man so gentle, so caring, so protective. She was in awe of him. Veronica turned to face him, her books forgotten as she wrapped her arms around his neck. She tried for sarcasm, but the words came out soft and yielding. "I'll buy you a Snickers from the cafeteria."

Logan's mouth was centimeters from hers. "Not in the mood for chocolate. I was hoping for something sweeter." He nipped at her bottom lip. "Hotter." He looked deep into her eyes and...

Students roamed the halls, books were carelessly dropped to the floor, locker doors were slammed shut. Logan registered none of it, as a thought that had been drifting in the back of his mind decided to make its presence known. It wasn't a flash of realization, more a final acceptance of a truth he'd somehow managed to avoid for... forever. Something so true, so certain, he couldn't deny it even if he tried. He waited for the fear, the doubt, the disbelief. He even waited for Lilly's ghost to smack him, angry at what she might perceive as a betrayal of her memory. But he felt nothing but a peaceful calm settle over him, even as the impossible thought grew and grew, and pushed aside all other thoughts, until it was the only thought, the only thought, until finally, finally, it echoed inside, bouncing around his head and his heart and his soul.

"Logan?" Veronica whispered tentatively.

He heard her uncertainty and was suddenly aware he hadn't moved or spoken. Their lips were still poised close together, but not actually touching. And the kiss he wanted to take, he now needed her to give, because he had so much to give her in return. It was too soon to tell her; she'd run from him. He was as certain of that as he was of how he felt, but he needed her to give him... hope. Just a little hope that maybe she was tipping her toe in the pool of emotion into which he'd just dove headfirst. Because if he was alone in this, if it wasn't even in the perimeter of her vision, if she didn't see the possibility, he knew it would destroy him. "Kiss me, Ronnie," he said, more plea than command, afraid if he didn't do something soon, the words would burst out before he could stop them. But he thought them; he thought them over and over again.

I'm in love with you.

---TBC

Short chapter, I know, but I had to get it out there. Review! Review! Review!