I'm amazed by the reaction to this story. I was a little afraid that people wouldn't get it, especially in the beginning.
I have a lot of people to thank this time around. First, as always, I want to thank Miranda, my beta. She gets my chapters looking pretty and is always timely and she's becoming an amazing friend.
Next, thank you to everyone who sent in song suggestions for part of this chapter when I put out a call for one.
And finally, to everyone that has reviewed, favorite, or put this story on alerts. I thank you all as well.
Disclaimer: I don't own Glee or any of the songs included in this chapter.
It wasn't long before it was difficult for Tina. When glee club started having regular rehearsals again, she was seeing Artie far more than she was before, and it was harder for her to just ignore him. And it wasn't even ignoring him. If he was, in any situation, to give her the time of day, she would be pouncing him with apologies and maybe even the truth.
But that was in her head, of course. The scenarios were perfect and always had a happy ending. In the real world, she knew that there was a possibility that Artie would never forgive her, whether he found out the truth or not.
She didn't want it to get the point where it wouldn't be resolved until they were too old for it make a difference.
Tina didn't want to show up at some twenty-five year reunion and find out that she had missed her chance. She didn't want Artie to be the one that got away, as cliché as that was.
It was a naïve thing to say, she knew. Very few high school romances pan out in adulthood. But people had said since day one that she and Artie were like an old married couple, much more content to just be with each other than go out and act like people they weren't. What if they would have been an exception to the current rule of high school sweethearts?
She saw him every day in their history class, but thank God, the teacher had made up a seating chart and put her up front, far away from him. She never even had to look at him.
No one said a word about the break-up between Artie and Tina. Most of them got the memo from Kurt or Mercedes or they saw it for their own eyes when they saw Tina and Mike together on the first day of school. Everyone knew that the break-up was a sore subject, especially for Artie. Even the most dim of the glee clubbers could see the way they avoided each other these days.
They didn't exchange a glance and a smile when Tina got her first solo of the year. They didn't high-five when Artie successfully completed his first one-wheeled, triple turn.
Their first assignment for glee was to come up with a song that described where they were in their lives at that point in time. Mr. Schue reasoned that, despite the fact that they had had an assignment like this in the past, a lot can happen in three months.
Artie knew that better than anyone.
When they were given this assignment last spring, he'd had no problem picking a song. He'd sang Jason Mraz's "Lucky" and Tina had done Neutral Milk Hotel's "I Love How You Love Me." Song choices had been easy for them. Everything is easier when you're in love. When the only thing you feel is adoration.
But Artie…he wasn't really sure how he felt, most of the time. It switched off from hurt, to angry, and back again, and to a million other emotions. It was worse when he was in the same room with her. Sometimes, he just wanted to pull a Rachel Berry and storm out of glee club when things got tough. Sometimes, he thought about what it would be like if he just quit.
He never went farther than just a moment's thought about that. It was hard for Artie to be there, yes. He realized this was show choir and you had to be at least a little spirited to be there, but he loved it too much to quit. He refused to let Tina take that away the only thing that made him feel good about himself.
Sometimes, when he was singing with the glee club, he forgot about everything. Forgot that when the song was over, things would go back to the way they were. When the song ended, Tina would still be with Mike.
The day after the assignment was given out, Artie asked if he could go first. He had gone home last night and things had just happened. The ball just started rolling.
He wheeled himself to sit in front of the classroom and retrieved his guitar from its case. Everyone was watching him with interest, because they hadn't seen Artie be this forward about anything as of late.
"I know a thing about constriction, because I've got enough to spare."
Artie often wonders what he could have done different to make things work with Tina. He had gone through their entire relationship in his head, wondering at what point she gave up and decided being unfaithful wasn't all that big of a deal. She got to have him, but she could always get what she needed in him on the side, with Mike. Did he not pay enough attention to her? Not stop and hold her hand enough? It was things like these had kept him awake at night, questioning all the things that he thought he had done correctly.
"And I'll be granting your permission 'cause I haven't got a prayer. And I'll say hey, hallelujah, come on sing the praise, let the spirit come all through you, we got innocence for days!"
Maybe there was something about him that just wasn't enough her. He didn't have enough experience; couldn't do enough. She said, time and time again, that his physical condition hadn't made a difference. But based on how long she had been able to get away with faking a stutter, Artie knew that Tina was a pretty good actress.
Was he too naïve? Too innocent? Was he not the garage band king to her punk rock princess?
He saw her hand clasped with Mike's in the same position they used to hold each other's hands. It made him angry inside and in turn put more passion into his singing.
"Well you think I'm gonna burn in hell? Everybody burn the house right down and say, what I wanna say, tell me I'm an angel, take this to my grave. Tell me I'm a bad man kick me like a stray, tell me I'm an angel, take this to my grave."
That was the problem with Tina. First, she's telling him that he's self centered and won't fight for her, and all the other things that are wrong with him. Then, the next time he sees her, she's going on about how he's her best friend. He's not hot and cold like her.
Sometimes, he thinks about giving her a call. And telling her that nothing has changed and of course he wants to be friends again. But then he remembers—she cheated on him. Sure, a kiss in fairly innocent. But what if she hadn't told him for another week? Another month? He imagines how much farther they could have gotten than he had with her. What would have stopped her from just keeping it a secret? Artie didn't consider himself much of a catch.
Tina could do better than him. And she did.
"You can play ring around the ambulance like you never gave a care. So get the choir boys around you, it's a compliment, I swear."
Artie saw her palling around with Finn all the time. When she wasn't with Mike, of course. She used to share all of her secrets with him. He used to know everything about her, as it happened. He knows all of her hopes and dreams and what kept her up at night.
She's completely jumped ship. She used to be too nervous to even approach Finn or Puck or any of the the cheerios. But now, he rarely sees her without one of them by her side. He passed by her locker once to see Santana helping her with her hair. Stuff like that wouldn't have happened when they were together.
She rarely spoke to Mercedes and Kurt anymore. She left everything behind.
Like last week, Mercedes insisted that she, Kurt, and him go to the mall, get some dinner, and go to the movies.
Kurt had gotten a pretty good rhythm for pushing Artie's chair. He didn't like to be stopped suddenly and Kurt didn't make him feel like he was going to be rammed into something or someone at any moment. He didn't replace Tina, who instinctually knew this, but it nice not having to wheel himself constantly.
And who did they see as he was being wheeled into Barnes and Noble? Tina. With Rachel Berry. And they were laughing.
"Mercedes! Hey! Over here!" Tina called, "You guys have to see this. Look at this dress."
"It's absolutely hideous," Rachel added.
"And that's coming from you," Kurt said, looking her outfit up and down from over the top of the magazine.
The four of them spoke for a few minutes, while Artie focused on the shoes of his friends. He didn't want to be there. He knew she was ignoring him. And in some ways, he also knew she was respecting his wishes, but at the same time, he wanted her to try to get him to talk to her.
"Well," Rachel said, "we must be going. We're meeting Mike and Finn in ten minutes."
Tina smiled and nodded in agreement before bidding her friends farewell and running off with Rachel. Since when had they suddenly become friends? Artie understood that they weren't hanging out anymore, but why she have to drag Kurt and Mercedes into this? He knew that Mercedes and Tina hadn't had a sleepover in months. Kurt had stopped talking about dance parties with her and Brittany.
Did she think he was such an ass that he couldn't share the friends that they both had?
He didn't know. But as he continued to play and finish his song, he could see the shock and concern on everyone's faces.
After glee was finished for the day, Artie's mother picked him up as she always did. She lowered the ramp so he could wheel in and secured himself into the spot where the passenger seat should be as she began to drive. He had his arm rested against the window, looking out at nothing in particular.
"Artie?" his mother asked. He turned his head toward her, "What would you think about seeing Dr. Cooper again? Just for a little while."
Dr. Cooper had been Artie's therapist pretty much since the accident. For a long time, it had been just an off-and-on sort of thing—he went as he needed to. Sometimes, he would go religiously for months at a time, and then it would start to dwindle to the point that he would stop going altogether. The last time he'd gone was months ago, after the whole dancing debacle.
He shrugged.
His mother turned out of the school parking lot, "I worry about you, Artie. You used to be so full of life and now…you just don't have that light in your eyes, honey. When was the last time you had any of your friends over?"
"So I wouldn't have to go back to Dr. Cooper if I had my friends over?"
"Artie," she sighed, "You know what I mean. I know you and Tina didn't end on the best of terms…"
"She cheated on me."
"I know she did, but listen," she said, "You're a smart, handsome boy…maybe if you started putting yourself out there again…"
"So you're saying I should whore myself out?"
"Don't use that word," she replied immediately, "And that's not what I'm saying. But maybe if you started going to church with us again…"
"Mom, I really appreciate what you're trying to do, but…I just can't right now."
Tina thought about Artie's performance for most of the evening. That night, Rachel came over to hang out. She never would have thought that she would be friends with her, but lo and behold. Rachel was surprisingly easy to get along with now that she was with Finn. He had really mellowed her out.
They were working on homework when Tina asked, "What did you think of Artie's song today?"
"I wouldn't have pegged him for a…Romance Chemical fan…"
"My Chemical Romance," Tina interjected.
"Yes, anyway. I wouldn't have pegged him for that type of music. And he was a little bit off-key, but I suppose to someone without perfect pitch like myself, it was pretty good."
Sometimes Tina wondered if Rachel was aware of some of the things that came out of her mouth.
"He sounded so angry."
"Artie seems to have a lot of pent up anger. Maybe he should be seeing someone about that."
"I just…I feel bad."
"Well, you shouldn't. You need a man that will give you everything you want and more. You said it yourself—Artie only wanted to watching 'Coming Home' and never took your feelings into account."
"Well…that's not all true." She thought of the day she had failed her history exam and Artie canceled going over to play video games with all of the glee guys to watch movies with her and sit with her while she cried.
Sometimes, she didn't give Artie enough credit. He had a lot of faults—but he knew her better than anyone else. He could say things that made her feel more special than she ever has. And she gave it all up.
The next day, Mr. Schue came into glee club and called the rehearsal to order, "Alright, guys, I have our first duet picked it out. You guys said you wanted more unknown music this year and I listened. How does Alphabeat sound?"
"Ten-thousand Nights of Thunder?" Tina asked, looking quickly to Rachel, smiling widely, "I love that song!"
"Well, that's good," Mr. Schue said, leaning over the first row to handing her the sheet music, "because you're singing it. With Artie."
Artie's mouth dried up at the announcement, "But Mr. Schue…"
"You should be happy, Artie," he said, handing him the pages, "This is a really big solo. This is on the short-list for Sectionals right now."
"I can't sing with her," he said quietly.
Tina pressed her lips together. She had heard what he said, even though he had said it quietly, probably so she wouldn't hear him. It was a perfectly reasonable reaction from him but…she had been wanting to have an opportunity to talk to him.
Mr. Schue put the rest of his papers down on the piano, leaning his back against it, "Look, guys, I didn't think I would have to go through this. But I can't help what goes on in your personal lives. Artie, you're singing the song with Tina. You have to check whatever issues you have at the door. That goes for all of you."
"But…"
"It's final."
Quick note: I chose "House of Wolves" by My Chemical Romance and Doodles357 on Tumblr suggested "10000 Nights of Thunder."