......"Yeah, Ducky, I do believe you're right. Thanks."
With tears streaming down her face, Abby turned the video link device off, sent an email, packed up her purse, read the reply to her email, powered down her babies, turned out the lights, and left. Too upset to drive, she walked away from the Navy yard, walked all the two blocks to the bus stop, caught the next bus that came by, and somehow managed to get home. On auto-piliot, she locked her apartment door, kicked off her shoes, and crawled into her coffin, finally allowing herself to let it all out. As the tears fell and the sobs came, she grieved; for the person she hadn't realized she'd become, for the hurt she'd inflicted on her former lover, best friend, and co-worker, for the trouble she'd caused him, for all of it, for every single negative truth she'd heard about herself, she grieved.
She hadn't meant to eavesdrop on the entire conversation; hell, she hadn't meant to eavesdrop at all. When she'd turned on the video link to Autopsy, her only intention had been to ask the man for a minute of his time so she could go up there and talk to him. What she'd gotten was the already ongoing conversation that she somehow felt compelled to listen to; glued to; like it was something she had to hear no matter what.
"Something bothering McGee that you need to share with me, Ducky?"
"As a matter of fact, there is, Jethro."
Abby had quickly and silently taped her "Do Not Disturb" sign on her door, gently closed it and locked it while listening to the unexpected silence between Ducky and Gibbs. Waiting for whatever was coming between them, she'd sat down where she could see and hear without being seen as she listened. As a last thought, she'd grabbed her lab coat to hold onto, thinking she would need it for some reason.
"Duck, he tell you about our conversation last night? About Abby asking him to date her again?"
Abby's shock had been great. She smiled from ear to ear. It took everything she had to remain quiet and still while on the inside she was rejoicing. Timmy had already talked to Gibbbs about her request! That must mean he wanted to give her another chance! Desperately, she clutched her lab coat to her mouth to stifle her joy.
"Yes, Timothy did reveal that to me. I must say, Jethro I am quite surprised that you gave those two permission to break your precious Rule #12."
"He's been through hell, Duck. If this is what he really wants, I can't sanction standing in his way. I know I can trust him to not let it interfere with his job. They've always had a special relationship. I just thought it would be nice for him if they could actually build on it. Damn sight safer than what he's been through."
Thank you, Gibbs! Abby had thought. I owe you a ton of Abby hugs! I knew you cared about them more than they realize! Yea!
"You seem sure of that. So then, what seems to be the trouble?"
Trouble? Is that what's going on? What is the trouble? Abby thought with fear beginning to creep up her spine.
"Duck, last night he smiled for the first time in months. I thought he was gonna be able to take this and finally come back from all the crap he's been thrown. But, to look at him now, it's almost as if he's more bothered by the help I tried to give him than before he and I talked. Hell, he looked happier before Abby even talked to him; and he damn sure wasn't happy then!"
"Rest assured he is more troubled by Abby's suggestion than he is by your talk with him. But, you are absolutely right, he is troubled just the same."
"Why? What's going on with him, Duck?"
As Abby listened, hoping Ducky would answer Gibbs' question, she felt her heart break with each admission and statement that came out of the M.E.'s mouth. Why hadn't she realized any of this? Why had Timmy gone to Ducky? Well, who else could he talk to? At least he told somebody, But, why did it never occur to her before, what she'd been doing to him?
Bunching her labcoat in her hands, she covered her mouth with it, soaking it with her tears while stopping the sounds of her crying from being heard. After a minute, she'd forced herself to quieten down her emotions and listen until the end.
*****
"Yeah, Ducky, I do believe you're right. Thanks."
Watching Gibbs leave Autopsy had spurred Abby into the frenzied motion. She'd had to get out of here. No longer possessing the ability to think past everything she'd heard, unable to deal with seeing anyone right now, she'd done the only thinkg she could think of. Sending Vance an email requesting the rest of the day off due to not feeling well, she'd packed up for the night.
For the first tine in her career, she hadn't' cared if she got approval or not, she couldn't have stayed after that, anyway. Thankfully, Vance had replied quickly, shortly and positvely. Less than two mintes later, she was gone, already heading down the stairs to the way out. For the sake of her sanity, she prayed she wouldn't run into anyone. With a great sense of relief, Abby had made it home without any problems.
Now, as the tears fell and the sobs came, she grieved; for the person she hadn't realized she'd become, for the hurt she'd inflicted on her former lover, best friend, and co-worker, for the trouble she'd caused him, for every single negative truth she'd heard about herself, she grieved.
Heading back to his desk, Gibbs found his head full of Ducky's revelations. How was it that Tim had held in so much and none of them had ever realized what was going on with him? How did the kid manage to keep his head in the game with all of that weighing him down? Gibbs had to hand it to him, he did a damn fine job of it, however he'd managed it. The boss knew that some things needed to change within the dynamics of the team.
Change, however, took time, and there wasn't anything that could change about the wrongs that had been done. No, the only change that would matter now would be to tone down his disapproval and anger when he dealt it out, to hand out praise more, and to make sure the wrongs weren't repeated. That much Gibbs could do.
It was a relief to find his three agents steadily and quietly working on their stacks of cold cases and paperwork when Gibbs reached the squad room. His relief was short lived, though when he took the time to really look at them. Where Tony was actually restless and board, Ziva had something important on her mind, something was bothering her, and Tim, well, Tim while he looked better than he had this morning, the kid looked worse than he had after he'd come back from talking Abby yesterday. Yeah, this situation was really bothering his youngest agent, despite the guy's obvious best efforts to keep it away from work
There was nothng going on today, so now was as good a time as any to do something about this problem. Not wanting to draw unnecessary attention to any of them, Gibbs decided to do thinks a little different this time. As he walked up to Ziva, he looked at her silently until she felt compelled to return his look.
"You all right?' he asked her quietly.
"I am fine. Thank you." Ziva replied in her confused tone. What could he possibly think was wrong?
Nodding at her in silent understanding, Gibbs immediately turned to Tony, asking him the same question.
"Yeah, Boss. Fine." Tony had answered.
"Good. Hold the fort." Gibbs ordered quietly as he walked to Tim's desk and again, waited until his agent looked up.
As Tony and Ziva looked on in confusion, Gibbs motioned Tim to walk out of the squad room with him, Gibbs followed McGee out of the squad room and ushered him into the elevator. Silently the boss led the way to a conference room and beckoned Tim to a chair. Finally, after a stressful few quiet minutes, Gibbs knew he had probably just made it worse by letting Tim stew in worry about whatever this was about.
"Relax. you're not in trouoble." Gibbs volunteered quietly.
""Okay." Tim let out on a sigh of relief.
"I would like you to explain something to me, though." the boss' tone ws actually calm and reassuring.
"Okay. I'll give it my best." Tim promised even though he was clearly confused.
"I know that McGee. You usually do. Almost always, as a matter of fact." Gibbs rewarded him.
"Thanks, Boss." Tim replied, relishing the unexpected compliment.
Gibbs felt a moment of frustration. There was too much ground to cover with no set place to start. Somehow, he felt Tim wasn't ready to discuss Abby with him yet. He took a chance and decided to start in the best place he could think of to get the most reaction from his agent.
"Tell me about your lunch with Ducky." Gibbs requested.
"Boss, I..." Tim suddenly felt like a trapped animal, caught unprepared and blindfolded, now staked to the floor by the hunter who'd cornered him.
"Relax. you've got nothing to worry about. I've already talked to Ducky. What I don't know, McGee. What I need you to explain to me, is why you couldn't come to me with any of this?" Gibbs asked compassionately.
"No offense, Boss. But, you and I... talking...not something that ever happens...between us." Tim explained the best way he could. As respectful as he tried to be, the young man failed to keep a lid on the obvious pain the truth of those words brought him.
"So I've been told. You're right, Tim." Gibbs' quiet admission rocked Tim's world off its' axis.
While he knew that Ducky would be able to help, he'd never even dared to hope it would bring he and Gibbs to this point. This was so far away from where they were normally at with each other, Tim had to force himself not to follow his 'pinch me, I'm dreaming' thought into reality.
Tim's every readable expression would have brought a grin to Gibbs' face, if Ducky's words describing the young man's real problem beneath the surface, weren't ringing in his ears. Uncharacteristic of him or not, this needed to be done. Gibbs stuck to his plan to take care of this with what came out of his mouth next.
"I think it's time we fixed that, don't you?"