Note: I don't own the 'Busters (and Janine), I just wish I did. :oP

The Damocles Solution 6

Peter turned down his mouth, lips pressed tight together. He turned around and rubbed the back of his head nervously. "Well, you go on your little escapade in the Hamptons if ya want, Spengs. I'll be here bleeding to death from the hundred thousand paper cuts I'm gonna get from this cart of envelopes." He picked up a bunch of envelopes in each hand, raising them above his head. "Why me! Why now!" he exclaimed in supplication to a cruel God.

Winston turned to Peter, taking off the newly modified proton pack and seating himself with Ray. "If ya need some help with those, Peter, I can take some of 'em. I'm not as techy as Ray or Egon but I can sure show 'em a full trap if they wanna see one."

Peter spun around, eyes glittering from thankfulness. "Janine, give this man a ten percent bonus next time he busts a ghost."

"I can take some along on my trip with me, too, Peter," offered Ray. "I'm not going to be gone for long but I can open a few envelopes here and there."

Egon nodded. "As can I."

The psychologist turned a suspicious eyebrow upwards. "You guys said that out of sheer unbridled love for me, and not because of some silly bonus, am I correct?"

Winston ignored the question and turned to Egon, giving everyone a sigh of relief. "Hey, you said you can take one with ya. We all have somethin' to do here. So," he pried, leaning forward suggestively, "who'zit gonna be?"

"And if any part of you has the nerve to say Slimer I'm gonna take that shiny new blastie toy you made for Winston and wrap it around yer neck," threatened Peter as he dug through the shopping cart, causing Slimer to babble angrily and cross his little arms in contempt, finishing with a punctuated "hmph!"

Egon uncrossed a hand and stroked his mouth in thought. "Well, I know some of the local paranormal enthusiasts would love to attend this gathering."

Winston's palm covered his face for a moment listening.

The physicist continued, oblivious. "They might learn quite a lot of information. I think my best route is someone from the organization that gathers in the basement of—"

"Sidebar, man," said the large dark man, suddenly getting up with a sigh. Winston tapped Egon on the arm to beckon him to another room.

"Sidebar?" parroted a confused Egon, but followed Winston into the kitchen anyway.

Janine shot a glance over her book at Winston and Egon. "Hmph," she breathed to herself. I know what he's gonna try and do. It's a valiant effort, but I'm better than that! Doesn't matter how many times we did stuff together over the last few weeks. Egon can stew in his own brew for now. Chivalry may not be dead yet, but I still ain't going.

In the kitchen, Winston went to the fridge to pull out the water pitcher.

"You, my man, are in the doghouse."

Leaning aginst the wall cooly with arms crossed, Egon raised an eyebrow. "Certainly this firehouse may confuse someone as to how we possibly make it our surrogate abode for the majority of our time, but I'd say it's rather offensive to outright call it a doghouse."

After pouring himself a glass of water and placing it in the nearest counter, Winston put his hands up and shook his head. He had to remember who he was talking to. "No. No, no, no. Figuratively. What I meant was, somethin' happened, and she's annoyed, and you gotta man up and fix it."

Egon stiffened in realization. "I—I know there is a complication. But…w—what do I do?"

The dark man pointed at his head. "Use that awesome noggin of yours to guide you." He winked. "I know you can do it. If you can do all kinds of crazy proofs and calculus and algebra, you can figure out the next best thing to do."

Leaving the kitchen, Winston helped himself to a seat, and Egon cautiously approached Janine's desk, step by step. He looked at her, hands in pockets. He obviously would've rather been doing advanced calculus at this time.

Suddenly, his eyes brightened. He cleared his throat, and said cautiously, "Janine? W—would you like to accompany me to the Hamptons for the upcoming occasion?"

Janine didn't even move her book. "No way, Doctor Spengler. Yanno what people'll think of us if they see an employer and his secretary alone on a multiple day trip together: not very professional."

Peter, who had flopped down in a seat himself, started opening up envelopes with a pen he helped himself to from Janine's desk. "Maybe if you emphasize the word HAMPTONS enough, she'll quit acting like she's a cheap date."

"I want my pen back, Doctor Venkman," growled the redhead. "And I don't think I'll blend in very well, either. My table manners are positively uncouth, and unrefined, as you've seen from my family upbringing."

Egon, shot down faster than a condemned man, looked deathly pale, but did not escape Winston's attention. Winston read the helpless look in his eyes, unusual for someone like Egon. Like he was giving a team baseball signals, Winston signed to him to calm down, and then pointed to his head.

Egon scanned her desk for any aid he might receive, and finally finding it, a proverbial halogen light bulb flashed over his head. It was time for Round Two. "I—I can get the host to seat Dr. Phil Dendron next to you," he added timidly.

After a long pregnant pause, Janine raised one of her eyebrows, then set the book partway down. She looked up at the blond scientist incredulously, which made him take a gasping step back, terrified.

She returned to her book. "Guess I'm gonna have to buy a new pair of shoes. And earrings, gotta have earrings. And maybe a clutch purse." She slapped down the book, now glowing in excitement. "And, hey! I should take along all of Doctor Dendron's books too! Great idea, Melnitz! I can even reread them along the way!" She glared at Egon, pointing at him. "That means you're driving. And…"

Winston caught Egon's attention, and gave him a hearty, but hidden, thumbs up. Good job, man, he mouthed to the physicist, who now looked over his spectacles at him, leaning heavily against the shelving in back of her desk, looking very much like he was ready to pass out.