APOV:

Alice's diary:

After I'd been at the library I felt like maybe I was getting somewhere, just sitting near him in silence was nice, it was comfortable. My whole life as a human no one understood me, I was alone. And then when I was a vampire I had my family, and even though I'm happy I've got them I know I need something more, but I don't know if Jasper is that... And he is human; he could hate me if he found out what I was... I don't know what I'm doing, but I can't seem to stop. I'm just going to take Bella's advice; act human and see what happens.

Edward seemed to be trying to stay out of my mind, either that or he was ignoring my thoughts, it would be nice if he would give my thoughts some privacy. I couldn't help but think about Jasper all day long, I wanted to know things about him, about his passed, I wanted to know why he seemed so strange... like something was different about him. When I think about it Jasper seems a bit like us, he seems reserved like he is hiding something or maybe I'm just reading into things... maybe he is just at a new school and doesn't need everyone in a small town knowing his business. I don't know I don't seem to know anything anymore; I wish I could control my visions and just know already what was going to happen. But it wasn't working for me.

Maybe I'm going insane.

JPOV:

When I got home from school my brother was passed out on the couch, I wondered how anyone could live with themselves when they were that disgusting.

I went up to my room and sat down on my bed. My room was practically empty, it had an old chocolate brown chest of draws with most my clothes in it, I had a dark brown desk, a computer and my iPod. These were the only things I owned, I moved around so much It wasn't worth keeping things... I worked part time where I used to live and saved up to get the laptop and my iPod, the laptop really is only used for my music, as there is no internet here. Without my music I think I might die of boredom.

I looked at the window to see it had started to rain, being cooped up inside all the time was driving me nuts, all I could think about was the way Alice smiled, and the way she smelt... oh shit why am i thinking these ridiculous things?

I walked into the kitchen deciding to get something to eat, but when i opened the cupboards there was nothing in them... the only thing in the fridge was an old pizza which really didnt look very appealing. I decided just to take a few sleeping pills and go to bed.

I was running through the forest, and it was cold... everywhere around me was green and all the plants were covered with rain drops... it seemed like the forest was closing in on me, I couldn't see the sky above me, I couldn't see a road anywhere, All i could see was green and more green. I knew I had to run, but why? What was I running from? The further I ran the darker it seemed to get, I couldn't see clearly, there was fog... I stopped running my heart beating so fast it might jump right out of my chest, when I felt someone's hands touch my back, I pulled away and turned around ready to fight whoever it was... but it was her, it was Alice. I was soaking wet, with my hair in my eyes and dirt all over me...but she was standing there in skinny leg jeans, and a beautiful crimson red silk top that looked amazing against her lovely pale skin... and she was perfectly dry, not a tiny bit of dirt on her anywhere. I just stared at her, with my mouth hanging open...

"Jasper are you okay" Alice asked as she placed her hands on my arm.

Her hands were so cold, or maybe it was just me... she was staring at me with those beautiful golden eyes... I've never seen eyes sooo beautiful.

"Jasper?" Alice said with a concerned look

"Um, I'm okay..." I replied not knowing what else to say.

"Your soaking wet, what are you doing out here?" Alice said, I couldn't tell if she was worried or amused.

"I'm, I, I don't know what I'm doing actually... I was just running..."

"From what jasper?" she said as she moved her hand up to my face and brushed away the hair hanging in my eyes.

Her hands were so soft, I forgot she had even said anything, I wanted so badly to pull her into my arms, I wanted to kiss her... she was so beautiful. I wanted her to be mine.

I woke up suddenly with someone banging on my door... light was shinning in the window and I sat up in bed, still wearing my clothes from yesterday.

"Jasper, get the fuck out of bed now!"

I slowly got out of bed, and walked into the kitchen where my brother was now standing...

"I'm going to work, I'll be home late and when i get home I expect this crap will be cleaned up, got it?" my brother Andy said walking out the door before i could say anything.

I looked around the room, there were empty pizza boxes, beer cans, rubbish and who knows what else laying around... the sink was full of dishes from who knows how long ago. So I'm his servant now, great... I looked at the clock, and realised I had about 5 minutes to shower, put fresh clothes on and get myself to school.