For the first time in 16,000 years, Donroth did not know what to do. Here she was, slumped over the remnants of the Sue'cide Club of Middle Earth, turning the whole room into a giant pipeweed chamber and unsuccessfully trying to inebriate herself with the bottle of Dorwinion that she kept stashed in her private chest. Damn her sue constitution.
What had gone wrong? She knew they should have passed that rule banning the use of sue abilities against the sisterhood. If Kira hadn't used her power of authority, there would still be a SCOME. If Erika hadn't subdued Racquel, maybe she would still have had the strength to resist Kira's power. Oh why did she oppose that vote? Donroth took another graceful swig from the bottle.
Things would never be the same. Looking around her, Donroth found herself reminiscing about the good ole times. Earth song lyrics began flashing into her mind. 'Oh don't it seem to go that you don't know what you've got 'til it's gone…' She could almost see Kira sulking at her corner, Racquel with her serving tray and keys, Rianna weeping on the couch, two very hot elven warriors pointing their arrows at her, Jasmine inside the pipeweed chamber…
Donroth blinked. There were two very hot elven warriors with their bows stretched, aiming at her at point blank range. Closing her eyes, she shook her head. Opening her eyes again, she could now see four very hot elven warriors with their bows stretched, aiming at her at point blank range. She must be hallucinating. After all, she had never tried Dorwinion mixed with pipeweed before. Besides, the two pairs were identical. Hot elves just don't multiply like that, much to the dismay of many a sue. Sighing, Donroth closed her eyes again and deeply inhaled more of the pipeweed, determined to ignore the sinful delusion. Old habits do die hard.
A painful prick had her eyes flying open and her vocal chords raring.
"What in Mandos' Halls!?" Donroth screamed.
"Do not move," warned one of the very hot elves with fiery braids who happened to have his arrow, at least the pointy metallic one, pressed against her throat.
For the life of her, Donroth did not know how one so deadly could sound so incredibly sexy. Pushing thoughts of satisfying bdsm scenarios out of her mind, which only a sue could do, she reorganized her thoughts and rationally analyzed the situation. Yes, she was being held at arrow point – several arrows to be exact. Yes, this was real and not some hallucination from pipeweed and Dorwinion since sues never get stoned. Yes, the worst thing that could happen is that they shoot her and her hroa dies.
Maybe she could use the recuperating time in Lorien after she was reembodied, which she was sure would be immediately unless Mandos miraculously wanted one of her kind to stay more than a millisecond within his halls.
Gathering the courage, she opened her eyes and looked at her [ahem] captor. He glared back with those sexy grey eyes that have definitely seen the light of Aman, his arrow steadfast on her skin.
"Shoot me or tell me what's keeping you from shooting me," she blandly told him.
After what seemed to be until the remaking of Arda marred, the arrows were lowered. The glares did not relent though. Looking around, Donroth noticed that there were now three pairs of identical hot elves, all dressed in dark gray tunics, all glaring at her as if she was the sue she was.
One of the pair with jet-black locks who looked slightly younger than the others (if that was even possible) was the first to speak.
"You are to aid us," he commanded in that oh so smoothly husky voice. Involuntarily swallowing, Donroth cleared her mind once more – with a lot more effort this time.
"How may I aid you?" she asked, her voice completely calm. Hey, when commanded by an extremely hot elven warrior to aid him and his equally extremely hot elven friends or, in this case, relatives, a sue does not have to think twice.
Her composure seemed to irk them more as she could see delicious elven muscles tense.
"You will aid us in finishing your lackadaisical mission to purge Arda of The Contagion," he ordered.
Donroth burst out laughing. Wonderful! Six very hot elven warriors who had a sense of humor. Well, at least one of them did. Tears of laughter began to stream down her flushed cheeks. Then she noticed they weren't laughing with her or even at her. Delicately wiping her eyes, she stood to face them.
"What makes you think that I can help you? Since you know so much about the now defunct SCOME, you should know that we were a complete failure. We are not going to succeed just because we'll now have some elven inspiration!" she said incredulously, although deep within she doubted the veracity of her own words.
Now the hot elven warriors were the ones laughing. Oh Eru! They were laughing. Their lips were upturned into smiles too! Argh!
"Typical sue," one of the deep chestnut haired ones drawled, in a completely sensuous manner. "We do not need you to save Arda. We'll be doing that ourselves. We just need your – services," he smirked, looking her up and down.
Luckily his twin rolled his eyes, keeping Donroth as grounded as she could possibly be.
"Elrohir, must you be so dramatic?" the twin, who by an excruciatingly difficult process of deduction would be Elladan, told his clone in exasperation.
"Great going, 'Dan! Now she knows who we are!" Elrohir hissed back.
"Must you be so juvenile?" a fiery-maned hot one sighed.
"She must already know who we are. She is a sue, after all," added his twin.
"I would not insult our kin like thus, Feanorian," a jet-black hot one warned.
"You will find that it is more difficult to deal with the sons of Dior, when they aren't helpless little elflings," the other dangerously informed.
As much as several pairs of identical hot elven warriors fighting could be an appealing prospect, Donroth, being the sue she is, decided to step in.
"Uhm, obviously you've decided that the fate of Arda is worth working together for, otherwise you wouldn't be here. So why don't you just tell me what it is exactly you want me to do so Arda can be saved and I can get back to that blissful insignificant existence that I can hardly even remember?" she diplomatically offered.
Six pairs of sexy grey eyes looked at her dourly.
"Well, since you're the dramatic one, I'll leave you the honors," Elladan told Elrohir.
Elrohir gave his brother a halfhearted acidic look before turning his smoldering grey eyes towards Donroth, making her involuntarily swallow yet again.
"As you know The Contagion has imposed new rules upon Arda, making a mockery of the very music that Eru created," he began, as he circled her like a panther stalking his prey.
If Donroth had her senses about her, she would have noticed five very hot elven warriors chuckling at Elrohir's "dramatics". But – senses? What senses?
"One of these rules subjects every creature in Arda, which could even include the greatest of the Valar, to the dominion of one ultimate sue – the alpha sue," he continued, spitting the words as if they left a bad taste in his mouth.
Donroth could do naught but nod to prevent herself from drooling.
"Now, while under the control of an alpha sue, the subject creature cannot be dominated by any other sue unless the alpha sue consents to such a domination and they fill out all the proper forms, etcetera and so forth," he explained, twirling an arrow to emphasize what he was saying.
At this point, Donroth's knees were just about to buckle, sending her helplessly into the arms of an unidentified hot elven warrior who deemed it prudent to approach the sue from behind and lay his hands on her shoulders.
"What my grand-nephew is trying to say, is that we will be free to act against The Contagion if we could only find an alpha sue that would prevent other sues from interfering with our mission. Of course, at the same time, she should not prevent us from destroying the very thing that keeps her in existence," he whispered into her delicately pointed ear, each word sending shivers through every nerve in her perfect body.
A fiery-maned one sighed in exasperation. "She will be of no use to us as a puddle of goo," he reminded them.
"Besides, you don't need to butter her up. She is the most malleable member of SCOME," the other pointed out.
Donroth was beyond understanding that insult. In fact, she was incapable of anything other than listening to the hypnotically intense voice whispering into her ear and controlling the shockwaves being caused by the light dexterous fingers running up and down her arms.
"So, Donroth, will you be our alpha sue?" the whisperer softly asked, his breath warm against Donroth's skin.
Do you honestly think she would say 'No'?!
"Yes," she breathed.
"Good!" the whisperer said cheerfully as he let go of her arms and walked back over next to his clone. She would have swooned more if his clone hadn't flashed her a brilliant smile that immediately compensated for the sudden loss of touch.
"Well then, on with the ceremonies I suppose," a fiery one sighed.
"Ceremonies?" Donroth asked, slowly regaining the more basic parts of her consciousness.
"Yes, the bonding ceremonies," the whisperer told her off-handedly. "Elrohir and Elladan, perhaps you should go first, followed by Amrod and Amras. Elurin and I can go last since we don't have any wives and it will be best for her to focus her energies freeing those who are most burdened first," he, who turned out to be Elured, instructed his companions.
"Wait a second!" Donroth cried, being jarred to complete consciousness. "What bonding ceremonies?!"
"The bonding ceremonies to make you our alpha sue," Elured explained impatiently as he helped Elurin move about the furniture to make space for the cushions that Amrod and Amras were rearranging as Elladan and Elrohir started divesting themselves of metallic and wooden weapons.
"Wait, what exactly do these bonding ceremonies entail?" Donroth asked, alarm and that guilty little – okay, big – tingle of excitement rushing through her.
Elurin sighed. "Aren't you sues supposed to know all about bonding ceremonies? It's not like we have to walk you through it," he rolled his deep grey eyes.
"But the bonding ceremonies that I know about… well, theoretically of course… but… I mean… they're for mating!" The prude in Donroth started to really panic.
"Gee, you're not a slow one, are you?" Elrohir sardonically asked.
"That is the only kind of bonding ceremony there is, unless you're talking about smithing, which we are not," Amrod explained to her slowly as if she were an elfling.
She was appalled. Turned on, yes. But definitely appalled.
"Are you all crazy?!" she screamed.
All of the elves stopped. Six pairs of gorgeous grey eyes narrowed simultaneously.
"Listen, the only reason why we're doing this is because it is necessary," Elrohir hissed as he slowly but dangerously made his way towards her. "The only reason why we will be enjoying it is because you are a sue – the very object that we wish to eradicate from the face of Arda. And if I have to bond myself to one more sue to prevent being "irrevocably" bonded with a human teenager from a place called Earth every few decades or so, then by Eru, so be it!" his face was inches from hers as he glared down at her, his eyes boring holes into her sued soul, the passion in his voice resonating through the room and the vigor in his spirit…
Donroth shut her eyes and silently prayed.
'Oh Eru! Help Me!'
Suddenly, she felt at peace. Perhaps Eru did answer her prayer. She slowly opened her eyes. Elrohir was no longer glaring down at her.
Unfortunately, it turns out, he merely returned to helping the others arrange the room for the "ceremonies". Donroth did not know what to do. She couldn't possibly bond herself to all six of them! Could she? NO! She could not entertain such thoughts!
'I am a sue. Knowing my inherent evil is the first step in defeating it. I am a sue. Knowing my inherent evil is the first step in defeating it. I am a sue. Knowing my inherent evil is the first step in defeating it. I am a sue…' she repeated the SCOME code over and over in her mind as the three sets of twins finished their preparations.
"Son of Dior, Catch!"
Amrod tossed a dagger-sized velvet box over to Elured. Opening it revealed six pairs of the most beautiful mithril rings Donroth had ever seen in her entire sued life. Her mouth automatically dropped. The fiery twins snickered.
"Just imagine how she would have reacted if Curufin had made them," Amras snidely commented to his brother.
Elurin gorgeously snorted. "I've seen better work from the Naugrim," he told his brother.
"I know, and they're less treacherous too," Elured replied.
The fiery twins glowered. The Jet-black haired twins glared back.
Seizing the opportunity to escape, Donroth's body began to stealthily move towards the door while her hormones were choking the life out of her.
Faster than she could breathe, Elladan stood between her and the door.
"Going somewhere?" he smirked at her.
There was only so much a sue could take. Obediently, she let him take her hand and lead her towards the meadow of cushions where Elured waited with the first set of rings.