Disclaimer: See chapter 1.

Author's note: Sorry it's been a bit slow going but to all who wonder, and have missed my 100 other notes to this effect – everything I write will be finished.

XXXXXX

Parker flipped through the endless pages that Dr. Foster had sent home with her this week. "I thought we were done with these," she complained, more to herself than Nate, but he answered anyways.

"Correction, I'm done with them because I know how to manage my time effectively."

"How does me – or anyone – knowing their spouse's favorite color help their marriage?" Parker asked with genuine confusion as she looked through the 10-page questionnaire she'd been putting off forever. Their appointment was in exactly two hours – no time like the present.

Nate kept flipping through channels. He'd done his questions six days earlier. Another reason to hate him (the list was getting extraordinarily long). "I assume it shows that we…talk to each other?"

"And here I thought that not talking would be more effective at keeping a marriage intact," she muttered.

Nate thought for a moment. "You may have a point there."

"Your favorite color is...black," she said, filling it in.

"That's what I put for you," he told her.

"'What most attracts you to your partner?' This woman has got to be kidding," Parker grumbled.

"My charm? My looks? My intelligence? You have so many options for that one."

Parker rolled her eyes and put 'not applicable.' Nate leaned over and read her answer with amusement. "Dr. Foster is going to have a field day with your answers."

"Good, maybe she'll finally believe that none of this was our intention. Hey, Nate, totally random question off the top of my head – where do you see yourself in ten years?"

"Cheater. And you only have yourself to blame for this, remember what happened last time Foster gave you a relationship quiz?"

"You mean when I set it on fire? In my defense…I was bored."

Nate looked at her incredulously. Okay, in hindsight that wasn't the best defense. And she probably shouldn't have done it in Foster's waiting room, considering it set off the fire alarms. "Shockingly," he said, "that's not the time to which I'm referring. Remember the last questionnaire that you didn't destroy?"

The second she realized what he meant, she cringed. It was three weeks before. Having become completely bored with Dr. Foster's 'homework requirements,' (and realizing that continued refusal to answer them would just result in more questions and the very real threat of refusing to sign off that they'd finished the course), Parker had deliberately filled in fake answers.

Unfortunately, through absolutely no fault of her own, (which Nate for some reason would not acknowledge), the answers seemed to imply she'd perhaps loved Nate forever, and only further convinced their counselor that there was a relationship between them that could be salvaged. Or as Foster put it, a relationship that could be 'renewed and reinvigorated once you recall the passion and love which your former selves felt for each other.'

Surprisingly Nate hadn't been furious, as she would have been had he pulled the same stunt. He merely lied right along with her, telling her later that they may as well play along because they were forced to do it, and this way at least it was entertaining.

Now, though, Parker regretted it because it only made Foster that much more vehement that they go along with her rules and try to 'rekindle the flames of their passion.' Honestly, they were both convinced the woman would benefit from a psychiatrist herself.

Parker focused once more on the questions. A few sections she was able to answer from making educated guesses based on having known Nate for two years and learning things about him purely by accident (she'd certainly never admit she'd been paying attention).

However, there were other parts that were infinitely harder. For example, the section she was now stuck on contained questions about how she viewed her spouse. What did she like about him, dislike about him, love and hate about him. And even more personal questions that had she been able to answer, she wouldn't have wanted to.

Like the question which had made her pause. When do you feel you fell in love with your spouse?

She sighed, frustrated. She couldn't put 'not applicable' for every answer. She'd tried that tactic once, already, and Foster had retaliated by asking her to come in for a one-on-one session. She wouldn't suffer through that again if she could avoid it.

She dropped the papers in her lap and turned to look at Nate who sat next to her on the couch. He'd given up on TV and was now reading through a file Hardison had given him earlier, though she wasn't sure what it contained. Something for a job maybe? Whatever it was, he was completely absorbed in it.

His distraction allowed her to watch him without fear of getting caught. She'd taken to watching him lately. She didn't know why.

Or maybe she did.

It hit her sometimes when she looked at him. That sudden instant, the surreal moment, where she would think: I'm married to him. We're married to each other. When the hell did that happen, and how, and why?

No matter how many times she had the 'realization,' it continued to astound her. As if it would never fully sink in because of how bizarre and unreal it was. Her mind would never accept it.

And yet there it was, not a secret, right in front of her, impossible to avoid and visible to everyone.

"If you keep procrastinating, you're never going to get those done," he said, startling her. He hadn't even looked up from the file. She didn't know he was aware of her gaze. Though, of course he would be. She should never expect anything less – after all, one of the last things people would accuse him of was being unobservant.

"It'd be for the best," she told him, shaking herself from her thoughts. She skimmed the sheet in front of her and picked a question entirely at random. "Come on, Nate. 'What do you like best about your partner?' There is literally no answer I can put for that question."

"Too many answers to choose only one?" he asked, and she knew from his tone that he was only amused. "And wait…why are you asking me to give you answers to questions that ask your opinion? It's not like these are asking you to figure out what I think."

"You finally noticed that, huh?" She sighed, throwing her head back in frustration to stare at the ceiling.

"Parker," he asked seriously, "what's going on?"

Rather than answer him, she decided a subject change (which just coincidentally happened to be related to another question) might be in order. "You never wanted to get married again? Why?" She asked, ready to record the answer.

It took a moment for Nate to understand what she was talking about. She was referring to their session when he'd told Dr. Foster that after Maggie, he knew he'd never want to marry another woman.

And then he'd gone and done it anyways.

"Being married the first time around was hard enough," he shrugged. "I had no desire to go through it again."

"Mmhmm," Parker said noncommittally, writing down his answer word for word in response to 'What are your spouse's feelings on the general subject of marriage?'

"Parker, I know what you're doing," he complained.

"And you still let me get away with it," she said, finishing her dictation and glancing at him.

He rolled his eyes and sank further into the couch. At this point he didn't really care what she put for the questions, but he still felt obligated to pretend that he did.

"I guess I understand how you felt," she said slowly, and it took him a minute to realize she was replying to his views on marriage. "But I was one step ahead of you. It didn't take me getting married to realize that."

"What did getting married teach you, then?" He asked, amused.

"Aside from don't ever get married in Las Vegas while completely drunk?" She smirked. "I can't really say. I suppose…it hasn't been as bad as I imagined it might be."

He stared at her in astonishment, partly real, partly feigned. "Are you saying it's not the worst thing in the world being married to me? I never thought I'd see the day!"

"I'm saying there are worse things," she hedged. "Very few worse things, but worse things nonetheless."

He shook his head and nudged her arm with his elbow. "You don't fool me, Parker."

"I never tried to, Nate," she said. Off his look of disbelief, she sighed. "Alright, maybe I tried to, but not as often as with anyone else. That counts for something right?"

He pulled her closer when she put her head on his shoulder. "It counts for a lot," he said quietly.

"This is too hard," she murmured, and he didn't know what she was referring to – the questions Foster had given her or…something more.

He chose to believe it was about Foster's requirements. He sat up straighter and pulled away from her a bit so he could look at her fully and focus his full attention on her. "Parker, it's not a test. We're not being graded."

"It doesn't feel that way," she said darkly. In response to his pulling away, she moved as well, toward the other end of the couch so she could stretch out her legs. She stared at her feet, where they almost reached his lap. "Foster is waiting to fail us, can't you feel it?"

He wondered why this was giving her so much trouble. "Maybe it would help if you looked at this another way. Stop thinking of it as a test about marriage, but as questions about our friendship. Would that make it easier?"

She looked at him warily but turned back to the questions and started substituting 'friend' every time she saw the word 'spouse' or 'partner.' Surprisingly, it did seem to help. "Yeah, I think that does work," she smiled slightly.

"Good," he reached to pick up the file again, but stopped when she threw her pencil at him.

"I still have to fill them out, this is going to take hours!"

He picked up the pencil and put it back in her hand, but he didn't let go of it, or her. "You're going to have to deal with it and put in the time. Don't expect me to come up with excuses for you when Dr. Foster learns you didn't do the homework. Again."

She froze momentarily before gathering herself and pulling her hand away. "You wouldn't save me? Typical." She tapped the pencil against the papers, as if maybe it would come up with satisfactory answers.

"I only loved you enough to marry you," he said lightly. "Not enough to jump in front of Foster for you."

She looked up at him sharply but he had picked up the file again and gone back to reading. What was she to make of that?

Nothing, she supposed. He was only joking.

She went back to the question that had originally given her pause, mulling it over in her head. When do you feel you fell in love with your spouse?

In a fit of uncharacteristic whimsy – purely to give Foster something to analyze, perhaps – she wrote, 'Too many instances to count.'

Crazy. You're crazy, she whispered in her own head as she re-read it.

Ten seconds later, Nate glanced her way, wondering what had made her cross out an answer so violently that it tore a hole in the paper.

XXXXXX

"Nate," she said, "you know that list I'm keeping in my head of reasons that I hate you? I'm rapidly running out of room."

He shot her an amused glance and then turned back to watch the people on the dance floor. "I don't know, Parker, I think this is what happy couples do – attend events together and pretend to like it."

"Pretend to like each other, you mean," she complained. "Why, why did you tell Foster we'd come to this?"

They were at one of Dr. Katherine Foster's fundraisers for under-privileged children, and though Parker was all for helping kids, she didn't think it fair to have to put herself through torture for such a cause.

"I told her we'd attend because it's for a good cause," Nate said simply, as if that were the only reason he needed. Well, maybe it was the only answer he needed, but her? He should have known better.

"I've never been to an event like this without working," she protested, as he blatantly ignored the unhappiness in her voice. Could she put his ignoring her on her mental list? Or did attending this fundraiser encompass everything about it that she could complain about? No, she decided, she could put every specific thing she thought of, because that made her feel better.

She gratefully accepted a glass of champagne from a passing waiter and ordered him to keep it coming. Anything to get through this night.

"It's fun isn't it?" Nate asked.

Parker graced him with a scathing glance. He couldn't be serious. As if sensing her disagreement, he pulled her onto the dance floor before she could register enough to protest. She just barely downed her glass on the way and managed to hand it off (to a guest instead of a waiter, but oh well).

"Ease up there," he said as they started to dance, and though she'd never been particularly good at it, she had to admit it wasn't that hard if she simply relaxed and let him lead. Which she did solely to avoid a scene. After all, Foster would probably punish them in their next session if she made a scene. Considering her scenes generally involved stabbing people, setting fires, or other things equally unacceptable (to local law enforcement, at least).

They danced in silence for a few minutes before Parker spoke again. "It's different. Without having something to steal or someone to con, it's –"

"Relaxing?" He offered.

"I was going to say boring."

He tugged gently on her hair so that she looked up and met his eyes. "My, it takes a lot to keep you entertained."

"Can't I just take a few wallets? For practice."

"No," he said firmly and Parker sighed heavily.

"As if you'd know if I did."

"I'd know," he warned.

And at those words she felt she had to prove a point. She deftly reached into his coat pocket, about to take his own wallet when – he grabbed her hand firmly.

"Don't think I don't know you by now," he said. "We are married."

She started to sulk. "Marriage really does take the fun out of everything!"

"If I can feel it, you can do better," he encouraged. "I think you're off your game."

She perked up a bit at his advice. "I'll keep that in mind," she said, reluctantly pulling her hand back, though her mind now spun with dozens of ways she could get him back. "Besides," she added, "you knew me before we were married which means you have an unfair advantage."

"And I fully intend to use it," he informed her. "Don't try anything – and I mean anything," he said as he spun her away from him in time with the music, and she was so startled she simultaneously let go of and pulled away from his hold, causing her to fall against the man behind them.

"Sorry, my husband pushed me," Parker apologized, when the couple turned to see who had run into them. Nate quickly grabbed her arm and pulled her back.

"Making me look like an abuser is not the soundest strategy either," he told her.

"Bringing me to this function counts as abuse," she sulked.

Before he could answer, Foster took center stage. "Alright everyone!" Their counselor announced, having seized a microphone right as the song ended. "Now it's time to swap partners! We're here to make friends, remember? Find someone you'd like to get to know and bring them on the dance floor – no couples allowed together. That's cheating. Remember, I'm watching!"

"What?" Parker yelled in Foster's general direction. She was supposed to dance with a stranger? She turned to Nate accusingly, "It's bad enough I have to be here with you! But I also have to entertain someone else? Now tell me it's not abuse!"

He would have replied except the couple next to them had split up and the woman eagerly pulled him into dancing with her. Nate shrugged apologetically and accompanied the other woman to the dance floor.

While Parker thought of numerous ways to cause him severe pain for abandoning her (even if it was against his will), the woman's partner approached her. "I can't leave a lovely young lady such as yourself out here alone," he said gallantly, but he wasn't looking at her. His eyes were fixed on his wife dancing with Nate.

"Oh save it," she muttered, though she reluctantly accepted his arm and once again she was dancing.

And wouldn't luck have it, she was dancing with one of the most insecure, jealous men in the room. "Your husband and my wife sure look cozy, don't they?"

"Huh? What?" Parker scanned the floor to find Nate and the other woman dancing along with everyone else, but they didn't look exceptionally close to her.

"That's Caroline. Always trying to make me jealous. I've told her it doesn't work, but does she listen to me? No, she doesn't. She never listens to me."

Parker shifted uncomfortably, but the man went from casually jealous to near ranting over the next ten minutes. It stung, it really did. Here she was dancing with an attractive man and he was more interested in Nate than her. Finally Parker wrenched herself away from him. "Enough of this," she muttered, as she tried to flag down a passing waiter, who she was sure purposely ignored her. Why? She had no idea, but she automatically decided Nate must be at fault for that, too.

She turned back to the dance floor where Nate had let go of Caroline the second her husband approached and backed away as they started fighting.

Dr. Foster grabbed the microphone again. "That went well – Caroline, David, would you two stop – thank you. Now it's time for me to introduce our special guest this evening. He's a relationship expert who might know more than me, if that's possible! He currently lives and practices in New York, where he's working on his first highly-anticipated book, please welcome Dr. Raymond Carrell!"

"There's more of them?" Parker asked as Nate came to stand next to her. "I can barely take Foster, now she wants us to listen to the boring lectures of someone else?"

"Give him a chance, maybe you could…" Nate trailed off as they saw the man joining Dr. Foster at the front of the room. "Learn something," he finished dryly.

"I'm going to kill him. I say that a lot, I know, but this time, I'm really going to do it," Parker seethed as Hardison shook their counselor's hand.

XXXXXX

TBC – I just have to bring the others back into it again, do let me know what you think.