Chapter 13

The Death of a Brother

Songs:

Hurt – Nine Inch Nails (its nice and slow, not crazy like normal)

Falling Slowly (Piano Version) – Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova

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Akane was a ghost, without soul or notion of being real and tangible. Though her golden hair glimmered against the chandelier light in an elaborately gorgeous up-do, there still remained a dull, listless shock in the depths of her eyes. But no one at the party bothered to gaze deeper than the surface and even if they did, the matter was nothing that concerned them.

Akane's red-pink floor-length was more horrible than the last. Sequins spattered everywhere while ribbon crossed over the front and back. There were no straps or dignity to the garment, the dress hugging her waist until it nearly became part of her skin. On her graceful neck lay a string of pink pearls, an early wedding gift Kenjiro had been so kind to send to her, along with her dreaded ring.

The party was basically every rich and powerful person who had sold their human souls long ago. Sure, they may have chortled heartily at Akane's little mindless small talk, but these people were shallow and cold, caring for no one but themselves. They didn't even bother to spare a glance at the waiters who served them like doting mothers. Business owners only talked to those who they could possibly profit from, no one else (except for the opposing company owner's wife, whom they had slept with on several occasions). There was no possible way Akane could handle these people everyday for the rest of her life and still keep her sanity, but she had to try.

As expected she had foreseen, she and Kenjiro were attached at the hip the entire time, her fiancé never once leaving her side. Every couple he introduced her to was lost in the mix of all the others. They were all just clones in her mind.

"Nonaka-kun," Akane began, seizing a tiny gap of silence as the business man they had just spoken to ran off. "I'll be back in a second, if you please. I have to use the ladies' room."

Kenjiro smiled obliviously at her, finding her littlest statements adorable. "Sure, buttercup. And by the way, you should really start calling me Kenjiro. Soon you'll be a Nonaka too."

Now Akane really did need to use the restroom. Gracefully excusing herself, she headed towards the nearest passageway, hoping to find some kind of restroom or private place to barf in peace. She didn't even notice as a pair of onyx eyes carefully followed her lithe form as she escaped to a hidden balcony.

Placing her over-lotioned soft hands on the cement ledge, Akane threw her head to stars. She had completely forgotten about the note until now, though an unknown force in the back of her mind had drawn her to this place. In front of her laid a fresh field of glistening stars, lighting the midnight black sky as no other sight could.

"Are you enjoying the view?" His smooth, carefree voice blew towards her like an ocean breeze, catching her completely off guard. She ignored any notion to flinch though, for her pride and what was left of her dignity held her in place.

"I was, but I guess you ruined that too," Akane retorted, glancing over to Kyouya's approaching figure. His lean figure was well outlined in a fashionable black suit with white tie, his raven hair falling effortlessly over his pale skin.

"Should I trap you now before you run again?" He asked seriously, moving slightly forward to the engaged beauty.

"I don't especially feel like running anymore, especially if I end up back in that hell," She answered, motioning to painful celebration she had been forced into. Truthfully, she wasn't surprised Kyouya was here, since Kenjiro had a strange disillusion that people, such as Kyouya, actually enjoyed the company people like her chump fiancée enough to be their real friend. Wrong.

"Good, because I'd like to pick up where we left off. You promised to uphold your end of the bargain, so I assume you possess enough decency to actually answer my question this time," Kyouya replied nonchalantly, strolling to a spot next to Akane on the balcony.

Akane felt no pungent sting in his words, though she wished she had. I'm such a masochist. She thought absentmindedly.

"Ask away and as promised, I will answer wholly and truthfully," Akane sighed, hoping to get this ordeal over with quickly (though she also had no intention of returning to the party anytime soon.)

Turning to face her completely, his grey eyes emphasized the solemnity of his question.

"Akane-san, will you please give me an answer that will allow me to understand you as no one else does?" Kyouya asked, his one question strongly thrust into the night air.

Barely breathing, Akane face contorted into defiant understanding. Nothing less could've been expected of Kyouya Ootori.

"I have sinned, and my sin is a crime that I shall never forgive myself for, nor should anyone else," Akane began, her heart already aching as her past fervently seized her.

For days straight Akane stared at the document before her, desperately looking for a hole in the vicious words. It was the notice to demolish the old building and she wished crumpling it angrily would solve the problem. Her tired eyes searched in fruitless strokes, desperately groping for anyway to save the people who adopted her as though she shared the same blood.

She had offered the idea that Leonce, Paul, and she could become a touring violinist group to raise money, though Akane could never leave her mother. Even if Akane donated all the money she had earned from playing on the streets, the profits were nowhere close to needed amount to save the building.

Her weary eyes stumbled across a small line in the middle, causing them to widen in excitement. Hands shaking in shock, she had finally discovered her answer.

If said establishment will be destroyed until after inspecting that living codes and building standards are met, and if not said problems will be revised and fixed. If conditions are found to be beyond repair, reconsideration of the project will ensue. If changes are found unsuitable, measures will be taken to ensure homing for all residents.

It was so perfect! It was all there, right in front of her. Yet, everything in the building was up to standard, since the standards and conditions no longer existed and was on the verge of indecency. If Akane was to use this, something drastic would have to be done, something that would be irrefutably unsuitable.

Burn it.

"No, that'd never work," Akane mulled to herself, the thought bouncing in the walls of her mind. In her head, she clearly envisioned crying faces of every resident, forced out of the only home they had ever known. She gazed at Leonce, who's only possession was his violin, nothing else to him but his name.

She couldn't allow that to happen. They were her family, and she needed them. Thus she began her plans.

The last resident set their key on the table, staring woefully towards the worn metal. It was almost as if a part of them was being left behind, washed away forever. For one last night, every resident who had nowhere else to go decided to spend time with each other, to reminisce and wave goodbye to their fond memories.

"Paul! Let's go!" Leonce called, already a merry look masking his dying memories.

"I'll come in sec, I think I'll take a walk and meet you at the pub," The young boy replied, his teacher patting him tenderly on the head and agreeing before running of to the rest of the pack. Paul began whistling a merry tune, and grabbing one of the keys, he entered his home for the last time.

Dusk crept upon the silent street, a skulking figure stealthily creeping to the abandoned building. In her hand lay matches and gasoline, squeezed tightly with purpose well known. Stepping onto the shopworn doorstep, she whispered her final goodbye, not noticing how the door was left slightly ajar.

She stepped back and kicked in the door with her foot, finding it sliding open with easy force. With hesitant arms, she poured the gasoline onto the wooden foyer until it lay slick and coated. Backing up from the tired floor and staircase, she carefully lit a match, watching the single, innocent flame burn meekly. Turning her eyes from her almost home, she dropped the match to the floor, and flames instantly burst into the room. Haunting, dancing light blurred her vision, tears from either the smoke or the pain pushing through to her eyes. She left the door open for oxygen and let nature run its course.

From across the street, she forced herself to gaze as the flames crept to the second story. Everyone and everything had already been moved out, and the inspection and any changes had already been accomplished. Nothing would be lost except for the ancient memorial to her days of happiness. The sun disappeared quicker than expected and smoke so thick you could stroke it began to rise in tendrils from the rooftop. Akane decided it was time to leave such a horrible scene, though her ears suddenly caught a cry. Turning back to the window, Paul's familiar face broke out against the deathly orange glow.

"Paul! Oh my fucking god!" Akane sprinted across the street to the doorstep, roaring flames instantly shooting out at her. They singed against her clothes, hissing at her to leave them be.

Next to the building stood an abandoned pay phone that no one had ever used, since it had broken some time ago. Praying to the god she had just cursed, she snatched the phone and dialed the police.

"Hello?"

"Help! Paul's trapped inside the building!"

"Calm down m'am! What building, where?"

"214 Rue D'Avingry! Hurry! Fire!"

Agonizing chills burst through Akane, crippling her speech. Catching herself against the harsh stone ledge, her knees wildly shook. Kyouya's firm hands appeared from nowhere, holding her quaking, and bare shoulders in vain. With tender strokes, he moved his hands on her frozen skin, attempting soothe the bumps that chilled her skin.

"You don't get it, you baka," Akane seethed at him, her eyes barely retaining the onslaught of burning tears that threatened to flood over her. She threw him away, surprising strength seizing her aching frame. Her throbbing, nervous hands clutched the stone perimeter of the roof, wanting the cement to shatter like glass under her shaking grip. Her head ached in blind agony, still unable to wholly control the overwhelming, painful memories that torched her head. Her eyes, clouded with frustration, maimed the cement below her with a gaze that could've silenced this building for the millennium. Loose strands of hair surrounded her face like a veil, lifeless golden pieces boxing her away from the rest of the world. Wrapping her arms around her thin frame, she attempted to hold in the seizing memories that threatened to explode from within her.

"Listen to this shit, because you wanted to know!"

Kyouya stood austerely beside her, his expression frozen and lifeless as a statue. A cold, winter wind swept through the rooftop, throwing Akane's golden mane into the air. She staggered to straighten her position, refusing to face anyone other than the sea of stars. It was an undeniable fact that if she even glanced at Ootori at this moment, the dam she'd built around her emotions would crumble to pieces. Those piercing onyx eyes had the power to bring even her strongest wall to its knees and Kyouya didn't even know it. And right now, her walls were damaged beyond repair.

Wind whipped her frozen face, staring blankly to the building above.

Where were they? Why hadn't they come? Didn't they understand he could die in there?

Without second thought, Akane plunged into the sea of flames. The intense, sweltering flames coated her skin, smoke choking her dry throat. She raced up the familiar stairs, now covered in unrecognizable, swirling blanket of malice that relished in the dry wood. Decaying steps collapsed beneath her feet, trapping her into the house she had set ablaze.

"Paul! I'm coming!" She called out, violently thrusting her foot from the wood and crawling to her friend. His face appeared in the door way, an orange glow of death staining his dirtied face. They desperately reached for each other, Paul seizing Akane's torso for dear life. She felt his tired body tremble beneath her, Akane wrapping her arms around him to stop the shaking.

As if to mock the struggling pair, wood fell from the ceiling above them, embers torching Akane's bare skin. Paul violently coughed as the smog choked his lungs, unable to move. Picking him up onto her back, Akane sprinted down the hall, flames whipping her strained form. A beam collapsed before her, the girl barely reacting in time to step away. Seething flame's strangling heat scorched her, the smell of burning flesh staining the air. The beam danced with flames, engulfing the entire path. Behind Akane, the floor fell through and smoke forced itself down her throat.

"Hold on…Paul," She managed to choke out, the boy's hands painfully grinding into her scorched skin. Closing her eyes, she sprinted to the beam, scorned wood breaking beneath her. Inside her body, she left her ribs snap like twigs and without control she fell onto the other side. Instantly, flames welled up near her fallen form, leaping to burn her exposed stomach. She cried out in pain, like the call of a dying animal who cannot escape. Forcing herself from the floor, she stared at Paul's rolled up body that lay crumpled beside her. Akane attempted to extinguished the flames that stung her without remorse, searing her flesh until she constricted them within the confines of her shirt. She reached out to Paul, grasping his small arm in hers.

"Paul, C'mon. We have to get out," Akane reached down to scoop him from the floor, her shirt catching more flames as she went. She charged for the stairs, the sweltering, hell-like heat stripping her down every moment. Her feet reached the last flight of stairs in agonizing pain, the open door in plain sight. Forcing out the searing pain all over her body she descended the stairs, so close to safety she could taste the cool night air.

Without warning, her foot collapsed through stairs, Paul flying from her back halfway onto the staircase. The charred wood splintered against her, arms flailing to force her up.

"Paul, Go! Get out NOW!" She screamed, terrified for her brother's life. Stumbling to his feet, the boy leaned heavily against the flaming rail. He struggled forward, now nearly at the end of the stairs. He would be safe, he would make it. With relief, Akane looked down to push herself out of the wood, a thunderous crack erupted through the building. From the ceiling above, another beam fell from the ceiling, hurtling onto Paul.

"NO!" She screamed, her voice cracked with smoke. She writhed in her trap, unable to pull free from the wood. Tears scorched her face, searing with burns and dirt that scarred her face. She clawed furiously at the wood, crying out as the flames engulfed her. Wood cracked beneath her, and she threw herself out of the hole, instantly scrambling to Paul. Beneath the heavy beam laid her partner, his eyes closed. His body was coated in grime and muck, Akane furiously shoving at the massive beam that trapped Paul. All was useless though, the titanic beam unwavering as it held down the boy.

Akane reached to his face, groping his face to stir him. His tired eyes flickered, never once opening to her screaming face.

"Paul! Please get up! PLEASE!"

His face remained stale though, frozen in a lifeless repose. Akane stared blankly, still shaking the boy as if he would wake to her calls. Her eyes could not tear away from his peaceful face, covered in burn and scrapes. The same face flashed before her eyes, his comforting, joyful expressions dancing across her mind. He had played the violin with passion she could not embody, he had offered her his family, and he had accepted her without question or judgment.

"Paul! PAUL!"

His laugh echoed through her head as she peeled her burnt hands from his statue like form. He had the sweetest, most honest laugh that had ever graced her ears, and now it was forever gone, because of her. Heavy water crawled from her eyes, dripping onto his sullen face, the rings around his tired eyes forcing them out.

"GOD DAMMIT! WAKE UP! PAUL, STOP! STOP!"

Beneath the hollow orange glow, blue and red flashing lights hit her face. The cops would arrest her, for killing him, for lighting the house. No, she was supposed to be dead, below that beam, not him. He was supposed to cry that she died saving him, but Paul, the humble angel, why was he there? Why was he dead? How could she sit here and let them tear her away, let them take her away from her crime. No, stop this fire, flames…burning killed Paul… he's dead…it's my fault… no I'm dead… can't stay… "PAUL!"

And blindly, she stumbled onto the street, just as billowing rain clouds shattered the sky.

She could barely stand, her body shaken by uncontrollable seizure-like movements. Chills racked her body, stinging and pinching all over her skin. Unwillingly, she threw down an arm to the balcony to steady herself. She despised the thought of Kyouya catching her right now, her mind a tormented vortex without end.

"Do you understand me now? I killed my own brother, and my atonement is living out the rest of my days as a useless housewife! I would've chosen prison, I would've rather died in that building, rather than being spoiled and living out my sentence here, in this god forsaken hell hole!" She spat, now desperately grasping the cement with both hands to restrain her barely containable rage and sorrow. The girl could feel the pain grabbing inside her, wildly thrashing to escape from the cage she was franticly forcing it in to.

"My life ended when Paul's did. I can never play music again without having him standing right fucking next to me, because Paul can never play again! I should've died instead of him!" Akane cried out, removing her numb hands from the wall and wrapping them around her chilled arms again, as if it would contain the scorching tears that burned her eyes. "I'm going to sleep and have children with that Kenjiro jackass! And I fucking deserve it! I deserve it all!"

She felt the raging emotions choke her, her vocal chords lost within the fire of her frustration. Next to her, she could hear Kyouya's solemn footsteps towards her. No! She didn't want him to see her cry, or to tell her everything was going to work out. Because she knew that wasn't true, and no matter how much she wanted to escape, she deserved every ounce of this agony. Kenjiro would always be waiting because of it, with damn lustful green eyes and his damn playboy hair , watching until they shoved her down the aisle and forced her to spill out the words she never wanted that idiotic jerk to hear. "I do"

Wheeling around, her crazed eyes shot into Kyouya, stopping him as if frozen.

"You wanted me to answer your question, right? Well here's my answer: I am a selfish bitch. I didn't even bother to ask what those people wanted! They were suffering, not me! They were the ones who would lose their home! And I killed one of them, all because I'm weak and stupid. I deserve to DIE!"

And as if it was imminent, tears exploded from her tortured eyes, splattering her expensive makeup as it cascaded down. Her hands raked against her head and face, digging to ease the suffering that stung her. Her golden hair toppled down, stained with tears and torn in her fingers. Kyouya could hold it in no longer, and he gave in. With arms wide open, he gathered Akane in and held her close, feeling her rapidly beating heart as it tossed in a sea of excruciation. She thrashed against him, hands clawing at him to release her.

He only held her tighter, pressing her closer the more she struggled. His figure was warm and welcoming, not judging or criticizing her ravenous laments. Her fists beat against him, unwilling to let him win.

"Stop trying to be strong, you don't have to prove that to me. You are not weak, Akane," He spoke, honest and without refrain. She constantly thrashed, attempting to free herself even against his words.

"Someone so weak could never speak as you did. Holding it in doesn't make you strong, spilling it out does," He continued, never loosening his grip for even a moment. Slowly, Akane's fists stopped, her form leaning against his for support, her tears staining him.

"I killed him, Kyouya. He'd be alive, he'd be smiling… if it wasn't for me. Why… Why?," She cried, pressing herself into his chest as if she could crawl inside and never escape.

"Akane, do you know why I told you to watch the sky?" Kyouya spoke plainly, placing a tender hand on her silken hair. She didn't reply, her tears still spilling out after holding them in for so long. "When I was young, my father sent me a telescope for one of my birthdays, promising to go with me and watch the stars. He never did. Instead, my sister made up for him and took me out of pity. Before I ever knew what a star really was, she told me that; perhaps they are not stars, but rather openings in heaven where the love of our lost ones pours through and shines down upon us to let us know they are happy. I never believed in childish, silly beliefs like that that is, until my mother died. And now, looking up at the stars has become the only solace I can offer myself."

He stroked her golden hair momentarily, feeling her rapid heartbeat against his. Her lungs convulsed, air violently thrown in and out.

"I can't stop you from blaming yourself, Akane. You alone make that choice. Maybe Paul would be alive if you two hadn't met, but you can't change that now. No matter what you do, he's still dead," Kyouya answered, Akane's arms still quivering at her sides. "You can keep crying that he's gone and you saw it happen, or you can smile that he lived and you knew him."

Akane's visage pulled from his shirt, hot tears still sliding down her graceful cheeks. Her tortured, sea-blue eyes stared at him, red with exhaustion. Her breathing was heavy, forcing tears out to pour over her cheeks.

"If you refuse to forgive yourself, there is no future. You should give up now if you can't do that."

"Kyouya, I can't do that, I can't," Akane managed to say, forcing her head down in weakness. "I no longer have a choice. I don't deserve to choose."

"Get a hold of yourself, Akane. It's not about what you deserve!" His voice suddenly rose, a strong fear never heard before. The mask of coolness that had forever remained upon his face had been torn off, this state of Kyouya naked before Akane. "You can't trap yourself; you don't belong in a cage. You can either continue to mourn and live in your past, or you can be happy for what you have done! Stop torturing and killing yourself! Live!"

Akane lungs froze, her head still bent against his chest. Her tender eyes rose to his, gaping at the passion that burned in those onyx orbs. Slowly, her shaking body was silenced, suddenly falling onto his steadfast figure.

"You always have a choice," Kyouya spoke, gently pressing his palm to her burning cheek. Compassion, honest and with prejudice poured out, forcing Akane to barely breathe. "Tamaki taught me a lesson about that one."

Lacking in any amount of control, more tears spilled out, though Akane's shaking grin shook them down her tear stained face. Throwing her arms around him, she buried her face into his shoulder, comforting warmth sweeping over her with unprecedented tenderness.

"I'll remember that, Kyouya," Akane replied, her body tingling as she felt his arms return the hug. As if time had paused, they held to each other, the soothing comfort pulling the two together by a hidden force. "Thank you, again."

"Akane? What's going on here?" A sudden interruption filled the air; Kenjiro's shocked face entering the balcony. Sauntering proudly to the pair, he completely ignored the fact the two were hugging extremely close and wiped a tear away form Akane's face.

"Are you okay, sugar baby? Have you been crying?" Kenjiro courted, trying to brush away the distorted makeup on her face.

To Kyouya's amusement, Akane smiled at this action, a devious twinkle in her eye. As Kenjiro licked his finger and reached to touch her, her hand swiftly slapped his away.

"Oh no, sugar baby, I'm fine. It's just been raining, only on my face and no where else. Anyway, I'll see you later, inane ignoramus," Akane grinned, pulling herself out of Kyouya's arms and striding away, her steps confident and without shame. "Hope you come to the concert, Kyouya."

"Oh, I see. She's playing hard to get now!" Kenjiro explained to himself, flicking himself in the head for good measure. "Hey, Kyouya, what's inainie ignorapotumus?"

Kyouya didn't bother to reply, only patting Kenjiro's shoulder lightly before leaving him by himself.

Wow, that took a while. Thanks to everyone who reviewed the last chapter, you have no idea how awesome it is to hear your reponses. And don't worry just yet, I will put the frying pan in somewhere, but I could only fit a slap in here.

If you want to find out Akane's reaction, review my slaves! ...I mean children .... I mean- nevermind. Review please, cause otherwise you'll have to wait a lot longer because...

WE'RE STICKING IT TO GRANDMA NEXT CHAPTER!

Also, just to clarify, Paul is NOT related literally to Akane, just that was the bond they shared. And I really couldn't think of how else to emotionally phrase it.