12. Music and Lyrics

EPOV

The girls looked like they fit right into the scene, dressed in all black with their SlipKnot t-shirts and skin tight leather pants.

Bella, especially, looked gorgeous. Her mahogany hair was curled in every direction, complementing the overlay of her tattered shirt. It seemed to produce a frame around the center part of a woman's body that lies just between the shoulders. Her pants were tight, showing every curvature in her lower half, her ass being complemented so much it held my eyes for a moment longer than it should have.

Her feet were wrapped in red flats; it had to be an Alice creation, the entire ensemble. I would thank her for it later. "Are you enjoying yourselves?" I asked all of them, trying hard not to focus all of my attention on Bella alone.

"Bro," Jasper had a slight slur in his words, "Are you ready to partayy?" He poured some liquor into a shot glass that he intended for me.

"No drinks for me tonight," I reached into the mini fridge and pulled out a bottle of water.

"Bella was definitely feeling the effects of the alcohol, her eyes were glossed over and she was all smiles sitting next to Alice. "So how are Emmett and Rose coming along with finding a house up there?"

Jasper fell right back into his sophisticated side, "Oh, they've found a few they liked," a little slurry but it was there.

"Awesome, I'm happy for them," and that wasn't a lie. I really was, now that I had a possible future ahead of me filled with the one person I'd walk the earth to share it with, I could willingly feel happiness for others that have found the same.

Bella was quiet at my side and Jasper had turned his attention over to his half intoxicated fiancée. I looked back over my shoulder and caught Bella's eyes. She looked down quickly and I saw the light rosy pink color flush her cheeks. "Sorry," she smiled embarrassingly and looked to her side. "I'm…seem to be a little fucked up."

She was so fucking cute, especially right now. "Are you enjoying yourself?" I tried to fight back my smile but I know it was visible.

"Yes," her body swayed on the bar stool and I could tell she was about to fall over. I reached my arm around her back and held her up. She leaned into it and was startled when she thought she was going to fall back but instead met my arm.

"Thanks," she giggled.

The lights dimmed out in the arena and we all made our way to the balcony. I put my hand out to help Bella and she took it gingerly. I marveled in the feel of her skin against mine and that little buzz we seem to produce yet again. I don't know if it will do that forever, but I can only hope that I get the chance to find out.

The concert went without a hitch, the best part about the night in its entirety was every moment that Bella touched my hand or every time she looked at me, but most of all every fucking time she hugged me was another step close to her trust.

BPOV

Edward was gorgeous in his suit, even though I was definitely feeling the alcohol; anyone would see it. I was not on stable ground so when he offered to keep me steady from the bar to the balcony seat I didn't refuse. Knowing me, I probably would have fallen over the ledge if he hadn't helped me. "NOTE TO SELF" Drinking and balconies are a no no for me.

The music was loud and so were the screaming fans. A few times I couldn't stop myself from resting my hand on one of Edwards, as he was seated right next to me. Each time, his hand twitched under mine like he wanted to hold it in his and I wished he would. Every time I looked his way he was smiling and looking at me. I don't think he watched the concert at all, but I wasn't going to complain, not now in the state I was in. I wanted nothing more than his company and that's exactly what I was getting.

When the last song was over I hugged him for the third time that night and he held on to me tighter than before. His thumbs rubbed small circles on my upper back right below my neck and I could have fallen asleep from the feel of it.

His electric hum was vibrating between us and it only made me want to stay like that forever. I was not in the right state of mind to be this close to Edward, the whole of my misery for the last 10 years. So I pushed away first this time, even though every fiber of my being was flexing towards him, not away.

"I have to go," he said as soon as I loosened my grip on his jacket. "I have to go and congratulate the group and escort them to the hotel, their request." He winked, "We're old friends."

"Okay, will I see you tomorrow before we leave?" I asked calmly, not clingy.

"Yes, that is if you want to see me. I wasn't sure so I didn't plan anything." He seemed so put out by that fact.

"No worries, maybe we can talk some more, maybe figure out the dynamics," I joked.

"I would like that very much," he said sultrily. He looked into my eyes, one and then the other, his eyes darting back and forth. "Can I ask you something?"

I felt like he was going to ask something important, something I would need a brain for, which, currently I didn't have, "Sure."

"Why don't you stay at my place, I have a couch that is plenty comfortable and you would be near Alice. I promise no funny stuff, and I won't invade your space or anything. I can stay completely hidden if you want me to."

I did miss Alice, being away from home and Alice was not two things I wanted to be away from and especially both at the same time. "Okay," I shrugged my shoulders.

Intoxicated remember.

I was close to sober when we pulled up to a building that appeared to be apartments. We had already gotten my stuff from the hotel and were now about to take it up to Edward's apartment. Edward's apartment; I couldn't believe I agreed to this. Maybe he knew I would and that's why he asked then, to take advantage of me.

Well we would see about that, I was going straight to the couch and going straight to sleep.

That's what I thought until it finally came down to it. Alice and Jasper had retired to the spare room, which was acting as their room for our stay, and I was left with silence; in Edward's apartment. I kept my eyes closed but every noise and every movement made me think it was him, finally coming home. I risked glances at the digital time clock on the cable box; 1:32.

I laid there for a while until I was so close to slumber I could hear Edward's voice, I could smell him and feel his presence like every other night of my life. He was speaking softly to me and I wanted to talk back but I couldn't find my voice.

Soon I was in a dreamless state, nothing but blackness, until I opened my eyes to see Alice and Jasper sitting at the table.

I rubbed my eyes groggily and then saw what was lying next to me on the floor. Edward had a pillow under his head from the couch and a blanket sprawled across his body covering not even half of him.

"What is he doing?" I asked whoever was listening or felt like they wanted to answer.

Alice turned to face me while Jasper got up and went to the kitchen, "We don't know; he was out here just like that when we woke up." She tossed what looked like a grape into her mouth and chewed it greedily.

"Well that's…weird," I thought out loud. I stood up on the couch and hopped over to the other side of him and joined Alice at the table. I pulled my feet up onto the chair and held them close to my chest, resting my chin on my knees. "How did I get talked into coming here?" I whispered. I can't believe I'm doing this. It goes against everything I've ever been told and everything I've told myself I wouldn't do.

"Bella," she stopped me, "You have to stop letting the past run your life. Look at how much he's been trying to make you happy. You weren't the only one hurt by what happened and he's trying like hell to make up for it."

"There is nothing he could do that would make up for what happened. I've come to terms that it isn't completely his fault but I still can't just throw it away. That one thing has formed who and what I am today, there's no putting it behind me Alice. It just isn't going to happen that easily.

EPOV

The after party took too long; I wanted to leave before I even got there but I had to do my job. Bella would be there and hopefully awake when I got home. Preferably sober, I don't like the alcohol having any influence over her actions. I want to be around her while she is completely sober. No regrets.

The last time she hugged me I thought she might kiss me but I wasn't going to push on anything. I knew it was too soon to be thinking like that but I couldn't fucking help it. Her lips looked so soft and inviting, especially the way she bit down on her bottom one when she was concentrating or nervous.

I thought about Bella the whole time I was at the party, even when the gorgeous women there approached me and I didn't even take a second glance. I didn't regret it or even want them thinking about me, I only wanted to run through Bella's mind like she's the only one that runs in mine.

I thought about how much I really wanted that to be true, for her to be thinking about me at the same moment I'm thinking about her. That wouldn't be possible because recently, since she reemerged into my life, all I think about is Bella all the time.

"You supposed to be somewhere?" Steve asked me. I had been standing in the same spot for most of the time, I haven't mingled in the least and usually I'm the life of the party.

"No, things have just…changed. I want to be somewhere but I don't have to be there." I replied frankly.

"A woman isn't it," he called me out, dead on. "You've been reined in my good man haven't you?"

"I suppose I have, do you mind?" I really wanted to go but I would stay all night if I had to.

"No, go man, we'll see you next round."

"You better plan on it," I replied before shaking his hand, and the rest of the band members, then walking out. When I reached the hall I was more like sprinting. I looked at my watch, 1:32. I could get there in 10 minutes if I hurry.

I unlocked the door to my apartment and went straight to the living room. I was stunned when I saw Bella sleeping soundlessly on my couch. Bella was in my apartment, sleeping on my couch. I moved close to her being as quiet as I could be. I didn't want to wake her, but I wanted a closer look.

"Mm," she stirred in her sleep but she didn't wake.

"It's just me," I whispered softly, barely audible.

"Edward." She said it so clearly, yet she was still sleeping. She said my name, was she dreaming about me or did she unconsciously know I was here?

"Yes, I'm here," I replied to her, kneeling down to be on her level. I wanted her to keep talking, maybe I could find out what her feeling are toward me. Was it more than just friends, or was I forever to be in the friend zone now that it's been so long?

"Stay," she cooed, "Stay with me." Her words were hard to decipher but I definitely heard that comment .

"I will stay," I told her.

I got up to get a pillow but her quiet plea kept me planted where I was, "Don't go."

I settled with a pillow from the couch and the blanket that I had used during my stay on the couch. I laid down next to the couch on the floor and closed my eyes, waiting to see if she would say anymore.

She didn't speak after that, she was in a quiet comfortable sleep and I joined her soon after.

I woke up to Bella and Alice whispering about something and I kept my eyes closed until they were done. I couldn't hear them and I didn't want to interrupt so it was the most logical decision, that was until I had to take a leak.

I heard one of the chairs being pushed across the linoleum floor and that's when I decided to make my escape. I rolled over onto my stomach and stretched out my limbs. I took a peek in the table's direction and I could see Bella sitting with her legs to her chest on one of the chairs looking uninterestingly out the window that over looked the river.

Her right hand was tapping her ankle in a rythmic gesture and I wasn't sure if she noticed me or if she was totally oblivious. She started humming along with the tapping and her feet started to sway from left to right. Then she added in her head bobbing. I was about to bring my presence to her attention when she belted out "I like to make myself believe," her voice quieted down to a whisper. "That planet earth turns, slowly. It's hard to say that I'd rather stay awake when I'm asleep, cuz everything is never as it seems."

Her voice was good, not shockingly so, but better than most. Her cheeks blushed cherry red when she noticed I was awake. "Sorry you had to witness that," she chuckled nervously.

"No, I quite enjoyed it actually," that's a good song that doesn't get enough credit. "Leave my door open just a crack," I continued the song.

"Please, take me, away from here," she sang silently.

"Cuz I feel like such an insomniac."

"Please, take me, away from here."

"Why do I tire of counting sheep."

"Please, take me, away from here."

"When I'm far too tired to fall asleep."

She laughed and I smiled, my hair felt like it was everywhere. I got up stiffly from the floor and my back felt like someone stomped over it all night.

"Awh," I put my hand in a fist and pushed hard against my lower back and walked off toward the bathroom. I didn't waste too much time in there, besides brushing my teeth and taking a piss, because Bella was leaving to head back to Seattle today, every second mattered.

When I walked back to the living room Bella was still seated at the table. "Where's Alice and Jazz?" I asked running my hand through my hair.

"Oh," she blushed and looked away from me; I didn't really understand why. "They went to the Water Front Park I think they called it."

"Oh yeah, damn." I wanted to take her there, "They could have waited for us." I flopped down in the chair opposing hers and a sharp pain ran up my back. "Awh," I rolled onto the ground from the chair and tried like hell to roll out the kink.

"What are you doing," she laughed.

"My back is killing me from sleeping on the floor," I informed her and continued to roll around from front to back.

I heard her chair scoot from the table. "Here," I felt a hand on my back and the warm sensation that followed rendered me numb. "Let me help you with that." I stayed completely still, unsure what she was going to do until she lowered herself onto my back and started rubbing firm circles along my back.

I let out a groan because it hurt so good. She stopped immediately, "Does it hurt?" she asked.

"Oh yes, it hurts so good," I replied, "Keep going please." She continued to rub my back, her hips swayed over me every time she moved her fingers. My manly instincts kicked in and I couldn't stop it. Thankfully, I was lying on my stomach.

Her movements were softer until she stopped completely and got up returning to the chair she occupied previously. "This is all happening too fast," I barely heard her.

I hopped up off the floor; surprisingly my back did feel better. "It doesn't have to, you're going back home today so it will probably be a while before we see each other again." I couldn't contain the grief in my words; any amount of time was too long.

"I know," she didn't look at me but looked down at the table. "And I'm not looking forward to it. I want to try this," her hands motioned between us, "Whatever this is. I don't want to run away from it when it just started." I sat down in the chair next to her, my heart thudding loudly as her words reached me.

She didn't want to leave me.

I grabbed her right hand in mine and rubbed the top of it with my other hand. "I will call you everyday if that's what you want, every chance I get if it doesn't bother you." I'd already planned on sending her a message everyday so she would know that I was thinking about her.

Her left hand came to rest on mine over hers, "Do you promise?" She asked and I knew this was going to be one of the tests.

"Bella, I give you my word. I will call you every chance I get." I wanted her to look at me but what she did next was even better. Her hand pulled out of mine and she threw her arms around my neck, bringing herself into my lap.

I wrapped my arms around her waist gingerly and pulled her closer to me, closer than I have had her since she returned to me. "This feels so right," I said out loud.

"I know," she whispered into my ear, causing my skin to rise up the back of my neck and all the way down my left side.

"I don't ever want you to leave."

"I don't ever want to," she agreed. "But I have to."

"I know you do," I didn't want her to think that I didn't understand because I did. Her life is there and mine is here. Maybe later, when our relationship has taken on a higher road, we could change that.

There was a knock at the door and I wasn't expecting anyone so I assumed it was Jasper and Alice. I made Bella walk with me to the door because the more time with her the better. I was not expecting to see the person that was standing on the other side of the door, I had totally forgotten about her.

Who is her you ask? You will have to find out in the next chapter which I will be posting one Saturday...possibly Friday night. Please don't be angry with me...it was bound to happen with Edward's rap with women. It won't put too much of a damper on their progress so no worries there....but it's not all good and smooth sailing yet. We're getting there though.

I told myself I wouldn't start this story until it was done but I couldn't wait and now you all are catching up to where I'm at. If that happens updates will be scarcer than they already are. I will try really hard to stay ahead of you but not guarantees.

Thank you Scrimmy....much love to you and I hope your VDay was the best possible. I got a rose, chocolates and a card from my honey...I love him MUAH!! that's for you babe...even though he will never see it haha.

Thank you for all your reviews I am stoked that you take the time to leave me your thoughts. If you are here from BMNM....thanks for following me here. We're so close to 300 and that's awesome, you don't know how much that means to me.

Four more months y'all.....I posted my fav Edward and Bella quotes from Eclipse on my page, thanks to Twilight-quotes(DOT)com. I think I may a few more that weren't listed but there were so many I didn't worry about it. Check um out if you're interested.

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