Photographer's Log: Entry 537
This morning, when I woke up, I was in the hospital! At first, I had no idea what I was doing there, but a few minutes passed by, and I remembered. I had fallen off of a 25-story building. I still don't know why or how I survived. The doctor told me I had been in a coma for 12 weeks. TWELVE WEEKS??!! Jetra Bix has had 3 MONTHS to score from my boss while I lay unconscious on the edge of death! That's not the worse part of it. This morning, when the nurse came in to serve breakfast she told me,
"It's a blessing you woke up. Your girlfriend was just about ready to pull the plug on you." Her words almost sent me back into the comatose state of mind I've been in all this time.
"My girlfriend?! I don't have a girlfriend!" I told her. She just stared at me confused.
"Well, a nice blond woman rushed into this room minutes after the accident. She looked so worried about you. She claimed she was your girlfriend, and she's been handling the paperwork all this time." The nurse told me.
"Did this woman have a camera around her neck?" I asked.
"Why yes, I believe she did." She said.
JET!!! That SITHSPIT of a woman!!! She's a conniving nerfherder!! Wait; she's worse than that, she's a conniving nerfherder's CHEAP hooker!!! Oh, when I get out of here, she is IN for it!!! Hey, why wait? I'll take her out right now! I got out of my bed, and instantly fell down. Ow, the hospital should really consider getting carpet, because tile is HARD and COLD. The nurse told me it takes a while for people who've been off their legs for a long time to get used to walking again. That nurse was so nice as to give me a hoverchair to move around in. I rolled as fast as a hoverchair can go to the lobby. Right outside the door, however, was Jet and the doctor.
"And you're absolutely sure about this, Ms. Bix?" The doctor asked.
"Yes, doctor. I know it'll be hard, but I know my Dex would want to go to his special place, and for me to move on in my life." That bride of the creature of the black lagoon lied. You know, she's a terrible actress. Well, I'll show her a special place! Just as I was about to barge into this conversation, I came up with a brilliant idea. Oh, this is the sweetest revenge in the WORLD! I casually strolled down in my hoverchair until I got to Jet and the doctor.
"Jet? Is that really you?" I said as I came up to them. Boy, you should have seen the look on her face! She was as stiff as a protocol droid.
"Oh Dex! It's a miracle!" She said through her forced smile. I decided to have a little fun, so I pulled her into my lap.
"Jet, my darling! Oh, you know I couldn't leave this world knowing I had this gorgeous creature to live for!" I said as I put my arms around her waist. HA! The shallowness of her breath was PRICELESS!
"Oh Dex, I… missed you." She lied trying to act it up for the doctor.
"Oh, she's probably just shocked right now. Trust me, back in our apartment; she's going to be all over me." I told the doctor. Jet just laughed trying not to blow her cover.
"Well Ms. Bix, luckily your boyfriend can be out by tomorrow." The doctor said.
"TOMORROW?! Why… that's wonderful. Yes, I can't wait for him to come back to his…"
"OUR apartment." I interrupted her.
"Yes, our apartment." She fake smiled again. Then, I rolled away back to my room. As soon as we got there, she jumped up and slapped me.
"OUR apartment?!!! Has you brain come back yet, Dex?!!" She yelled.
"Hey, you asked for this, Jet. You are my girlfriend, aren't you? We wouldn't want the Weekly Galaxy to post a story about a certain photographer pretending to be a rival photographer's girlfriend in order to PULL THE PLUG ON HIM! Now, would we?" I grinned at her. She gave a sigh of defeat. Oh, I wish I had that on camera. Camera. MY CAMERA!!! I snapped out of my evil revenge plan to find my camera. It wasn't on the side table, and it wasn't in the lobby. Where WAS IT???!!!!
"Aw, did you lose something, sweetheart? Like your camera, for instance?" Jet taunted me. I looked up at her; she didn't STEAL my photos, did she?!
"For you information, it's in the trash can…in a million pieces." She said. Fate slapped me in the face then and there. My perfect shot, gone! I wanted to cry, but not in front of Jet! I simply turned to her with a smug.
"What's that look for? It's a little hard to be a photographer without a camera." She laughed at me.
"I know, that's why I'm going to use yours until I raise enough for a new one!" I told her. She stopped laughing.
"No way!" She said.
"Alright, then I'm calling the boss. He's going to love this scandal." I said picking up the phone. She stopped my hand from touching the dial.
"Fine. You can use…my…camera." She murmured.
"Aw, that's so sweet, darling!" I grinned again.
"So…I'll pick you up tomorrow, I'll pack, and we'll go to your apartment." She said as she left.
"Oh it won't be necessary to pack, my precious angel! We're living in YOUR apartment!" I called to her as she left the room. She just shivered and left. I just laughed.
Yes, I am greatly hurt by the fact I lost the most important picture of my career, but I got something in return. JETRA BIX, the she-demon of the galaxy, is now my slave! Muahahahahaha! Don't worry I will get that picture again. Skywalker and Amidala can't hide forever! I wasn't allowed to stay alive to fail again!
A/N: I know, I wandered off from the main story, but I just got the sudden idea to give our protagonist and antagonist a back story. I hope you, my faithful readers, will approve. We will get back to the photo, I promise. And next time there will be extra juicy stuff for the picture!