AN: Hello, my pretties! What is this…posting a day early? Yes—I decided that as a fandom, we will be too overcome with joy and anticipation tomorrow to properly focus on this chapter, so here it is.
Thank you to all of the reviewers. You came out in hoardes to stop that potential Emily/Edward hook up. The Call Girls were, of course, first in line, though. Good for you ;) Boy's starting to get it, but you'll see he's still working through a bunch of shit. Sorry that this is going slowly for some of you, but I promise, once the ball starts rolling…you'll need a fire extinguisher.
Extra thanks to Lisa89 for getting this chapter pretty for me with a ton of RL shit going on. You're a goddess. And also to il-bel-mondo, who puts up with me an my pervy mind on an hourly basis. Three weeks, bb. Can't wait to party it up with you.
Now—ONWARDS!
~Bella~
I was jolted awake the next morning at seven-thirty by reveille—aka my new morning wake-up call for the next two months—with an odd sense of foreboding. I didn't know if it was because of the massive amounts of awkwardness Edward and I had been exuding merely hours previous or if I was just incredibly nervous to have a flock of campers, but I had a feeling that today wasn't going to go smoothly. Wiping the sleep from my eyes, I reached for my glasses—far too tired to put in my contacts just yet.
"Wake up, bitch!" Alice called, pushing her way into my darkened cabin. Alice loved the first day of camp…and she was a morning person. I wouldn't be surprised if she had been up since five. Rolling over, I looked to see that she was, in fact, already showered and made up, ready for the day.
"I'm coming…" I groaned, sitting up slowly and pushing my glasses up my nose. Not even bothering to put on a bra, I threw on Edward's red hoodie over my ensemble and made my way over to Alice, who was already huffing with impatience. "Good God, woman, breakfast doesn't start for another half an hour."
"I know, but we have to go get Rosalie, and I want to see our table assignments and…" I let Alice ramble on as she grabbed my hand and pulled me the two doors down to Rosalie's cabin.
Apparently everyone was a morning person except for me. Rosalie was just finishing straightening her hair when we arrived and was already fully dressed. I was starting to feel like a slob just looking at them. Rosalie turned and smirked at me.
"Didn't get that much sleep, Bella?" she said, raising a pointed eyebrow at me.
I didn't bother to respond. Instead, I just groaned and pulled the large red hood over my head, hoping to hide away from the two boisterous girls in front of me.
"Why wouldn't she have gotten that much sleep?" Alice asked Rose before turning to me. "Why wouldn't you have gotten that much sleep, LB?" I shook my head, not ready to relive the awkwardness that was last night. "What happened? Bel-la!" she whined, her volume steadily increasing, making my head ring uncomfortably.
"She spent all last night talking to Edward on the front porch."
"You did WHAT?" Alice screeched. "Okay, that's fine. We'll talk about that later. And I'll excuse the glasses just this once. But don't think I'll forget, LB, 'cause I won't."
"Thanks, Rose."
"No problem." She winked and then looped her arms through mine and Alice's, leading us towards the dining hall.
I slid onto the bench quickly and rested my head on the table while Alice ordered me a coffee with a box of skim milk and three packets of Splenda from the table server. Thank God for small favors, right?
My head continued to rest on the table, even when I heard Emmett, Jake, Edward, and Jasper approach the table, grunting a hello of sorts. I only lifted my head back up when I could smell the coffee directly in front of my face. My hand went out to grab it, as did Emmett's.
"If you value your life at all, you will stop that movement immediately," I threatened, not raising my voice at all.
Emmett startled and then broke into laughter, pushing the cup of steamy goodness back in my direction. As I made up my coffee to perfection, Emmett's laughter continued…as did everyone else's, for some reason. I looked up with curiosity before Emmett leaned back, revealing a hoodie-clad, glasses-wearing, exhausted-looking Edward. And despite how tired he looked, I couldn't help but notice how delicious Edward appeared in glasses.
"Awww, you guys match. Isn't that adorable?"
"Precious," Alice cooed directly into my ear. I twitched in her direction, my only real response, chugging down my coffee and ordering another one on the spot.
"I didn't know you wore glasses, LB," Edward commented sleepily. I immediately became self-conscious. I'd forgotten that I was wearing my glasses, too. And even though Edward looked yummier than yummy in his, that didn't mean I looked like sex reincarnate in mine. In fact, I rarely wore them at all because they made me look like a huge dork.
"LB hasn't worn her glasses in public since she was, what, ten?" Emmett laughed, wrapping a large arm around my shoulders. "I remember the summer you got contacts. I've never seen a little girl that excited before. I thought you looked super cute with the glasses, though."
"Yeah, sure."
"I think you still look super cute with the glasses," Edward spoke up. I snapped my head towards his voice, only to see him smiling happily at me. Maybe the awkwardness from last night had been a fluke? It seemed like Edward was perfectly fine with me again. Weird. Assuming we were back to normal, I figured it was okay to resume our typical banter.
"You don't look so bad yourself, Clark."
"Clark?"
"Aren't you supposed to be some sort of comic book nerd? At least, that's the word out on the street."
Edward rolled his eyes before digging into his bowl of cereal, milk sloshing everywhere. "Trust me, I'm no Superman."
"Clearly. Clark Kent had far better manners than you," I scolded, eyeing the milk that had splashed onto the table.
Edward ignored my comment and continued to spoon large mouthfuls of the cereal into his mouth, until his cheeks were so big, he looked like a squirrel saving up food for the winter. I couldn't control myself anymore and finally cracked my first smile of the day, shaking my head in amusement.
"Wan some?" Edward attempted to say, his mouth still full.
"No talking with your mouth full, dear," Jake mocked, batting his eyes at Edward as he wiped his mouth with his sleeve.
"I don't eat in the morning. Only coffee." I shrugged, taking another large sip of my caffeinated beverage.
"You need proper nutrition to grow big and strong." Edward tsk'ed in my direction, replicating Jake's motherly tone. "Caffeine stunts your growth. It's why you're so tiny, LB."
"Not everywhere…" Jake wiggled his eyebrows, reaching past Alice to grab at my chest over the zipped-up hoodie.
"Jake!" Edward and I yelled simultaneously as his large hands squeezed my breasts.
"What? All I'm saying is that you've filled in, and I've noticed, LB." I shook my head in disbelief. Did Jake really just grope me in public? Am I still dreaming?
Emmett, Rosalie, Alice, and Jasper—who had been fairly silent for this past exchange—finally broke out into loud whoops and hollers, making me realize that Jake had nearly gotten to second base with me with the entire table watching.
"And on that note, since I'm not eating, I think I'm going to head out and take a shower…" I blushed.
"Aww, I didn't mean anything by it, LB!" Jake attempted to apologize as I roused from my seat. Looking back, I saw him looking so dejected that I had to go over and let him know that I wasn't offended. Meanwhile, Edward was shooting his Clark Kent heat-ray lasers into the side of Jake's head.
Well, if that comment upset him…let's see what he makes of this. LB is NOT so little after all, is she?
"I know, Jakey Bear." I smiled, using my age-old nickname for the lumbering giant. "I forgive you. All I want in return in a kiss, please." I turned my head towards Edward and leaned down to Jake's sitting height. He smiled in return and puckered his lips together in a forced pout. Feeling particularly confident (and attempting to get a potentially jealous reaction out of Edward), I reached down and grabbed Jake's hands from his lap and pressed his hands back over my chest as he placed a large, wet kiss to my cheek. Edward's eyes nearly bugged out of his head as he followed the motion of my hands joined with Jake's. Still laughing, I turned away from the table and headed out of the cafeteria, feeling completely rejuvenated.
"Fuck yeah!" I heard Jake call out over Emmett's boisterous laugh. "Damn, that girl is stacked! And no bra—shibby!" Jake continued, followed by a loud thwack and an, "Ow, what the fuck, Edward?"
Maybe today was going to be a good day after all.
***
Or maybe not. Thirteen-year-old girls sucked. And I felt truly sorry for the world that I had ever been one.
"No, Vicky!" one of the blonde ones yelled. "You can't put your Miley Cyrus poster up! I have a Jonas Brothers poster, and I think it would be disrespectful to Nick to put her up next to him."
Vicky, a tiny red-headed thing, sighed and nodded solemnly. "You're right, Jen. I don't know what I was thinking. Nick would not approve. How about this one?" She held up a large poster for Camp Rock. The blonde one nodded enthusiastically, and with that, they were off, pulling centerfolds out of their Tiger Beat magazines. I couldn't believe that these were actual conversations I was witnessing.
When the girls first arrived, I was incredibly excited to meet them. My six girls—Vicky, Jen, Andie, Danielle, Rachel, and Lauren—they weren't as excited about meeting me, though. Instead of a hello, I got a gaggle of screaming girls, who were—without a doubt—going to be raising hell this summer. There had already been a near blowout between Danielle and Rachel, deciding who had to sleep in the bed next to mine.
I mean, really? Was I this bad when I was a camper? Note to self: apologize to Emmett.
Andie was the only remotely well-behaved one, and I was pretty sure I only thought that because she'd been out of the cabin as soon as she'd unpacked her belongings and made her bed. In fact, I had no idea of her current whereabouts. And I wasn't about to ask the other five brats. No, they were too busy fighting over which Disney show was better—Wizards of Waverly Place or Suite Life on Deck. I was definitely in for a long summer. Hopefully, my afternoon classes would have more promising campers than these ones.
When the bell rang for lunch, I practically skipped over to the dining hall, desperate for some friendly faces. Luckily, I ran into Rosalie and Emmett, who were looking over the table assignments. Suddenly, Rosalie turned around and threw herself into Emmett's arms. Looking startled, Emmett took a second to compose himself before hugging her back.
"Hey, guys…" I approached them tentatively. "What's going on?"
"Oh, hey, Bella." Rosalie smiled and stepped out of Emmett's arms, looking a bit nervous. "I just found out that I'm stationed to be the foot of Emmett's table."
"Table 16, what up?" Emmett raised his hand to high five Rosalie loudly.
I hoped to God that I was stationed at a good person's table. If I had to endure three meals a day with a heinous counselor, I wasn't sure what I was going to do. I really needed this day to turn around and fast. Emmett's eyes went back to the list, presumably to find my name…and he burst out laughing. Never a good sign, coming from Emmett.
"Looks like you're in luck, LB. You're the foot of Table 1," he snorted.
"Um, okay?"
"I'll give you two guesses as to who are the heads of Tables 1 and 2. Only they would be gay enough to request tables next to one another. Here's a hint: your table head rounded second with you this morning." He paused and looked thoughtful. "Damn, girl. By the end of this summer we're all going to have felt you up. Ooh, she wants it, uh uh she wants it…" he sang in the style of Justin Timberlake. Ass. I shot a death glare at Emmett, who recoiled pretty quickly for being such a large guy. "Kidding…I didn't actually touch your boobs, did I? I can't remember…"
"Stop being a jackass on purpose, you oaf," Rosalie said as she smacked his arm.
Before I could thank her for coming to my defense (I was fairly certain that Emmett hadn't touched the ladies…), I felt large, warm hands clamp onto my waist and spin me high into the air.
"Jake, put me down!" I squirmed, recognizing the devious chuckle in my ear.
"Put her down, you tool," Edward rolled his eyes as he brushed by Jake and me coolly. "Where's Alice?"
"What's up your ass?" Jake said as he put me back on the ground, punching Edward in the shoulder instead.
Edward's eyes narrowed. "Nothing," he scoffed. "Just watch your mouth, Jake. Campers are officially here."
"Okay, Mom," Jake laughed, wrapping his arms around my waist again to pull me into a warm hug. Edward's eyes narrowed again, and I wondered what the hell actually was up his ass. I knew that he had a reputation for being moody—Jake and Emmett would often complain about it, actually—but I'd never seen it in action before. It was slightly disconcerting, and I wasn't sure how I felt about it. Not wanting to think about it, I relaxed into Jake's embrace, leaning my back against his chest.
"Ooh, she wants it, uh uh she wants it…" Emmett started singing again.
"So I'm gonna give it to her…" Jake finished the line as his hands started rising up my torso again. Knowing where he was headed, I squealed loudly and extracted myself from his arms. I ran into Rosalie's waiting embrace seeking refuge from the hulking mass chasing after me. She laughed and wrapped herself around me, protecting me from the grabby hands of Jake and Emmett, who were tag-teaming me from either side.
"Leave me alone, you goons!"
"If you hadn't given them an open invitation, maybe this would be a non-issue," Edward stated, sounding completely disgusted. His eyes weren't even on me. I recoiled, my breath hitching and my smile disappearing immediately. Jake and Emmett's playful smiles disappeared, too; their eyes snapped to Edward, whose gaze was trained on the ground.
"What's that supposed to mean?" I refuted angrily. If Edward thought he could be a moody fucker with me, he was sorely mistaken. I wasn't in the mood for taking anyone's shit after dealing with the thirteen year olds from hell this morning.
Edward looked up, his eyes conveying disgust. "I was just saying that your behavior speaks volumes. If you don't want people to think of you like that—"
"Like what?" I interrupted, my temper starting to boil over.
"You know like what," he scoffed, crossing his arms and scowling at me. I felt my body tensing and preparing to lunge at him when Rosalie's arms tightened around my waist. No one was holding Jake back, though.
"Edward!" Jake shouted, punching him square in the back. I would have flinched at the force he'd hit him with, had I not been so utterly shocked, pissed, and humiliated. "What's wrong with you? You've been acting like a first-class jerk since you woke up this morning. Take it out on me—I don't care. But what the fuck did LB ever do to you?"
Before Edward could respond, though, Alice bounded up the stairs into his arms. "Edward, I'm the foot of your table! LB, can you believe it? We're going to be next to each other all summer long! I'm so excited. I hope we have a good group of girls."
Ignoring Rosalie's firm grasp, I stepped towards Edward, wanting to confront him, but his eyes refused to meet mine. Coward.
"Pussy," I muttered under my breath as I grabbed Jake's hand, boring holes into the side of Edward's head with my eyes. "Uh…come on, Jake. Let's go set up the table."
I didn't know what Edward's problem was, but I was in no mood to coddle him today. If he didn't want to play nice, then I wasn't going to play nice either.
Jake and I set our table quickly and stood, waiting for our campers to arrive. Edward walked by quickly and quietly, laying out a stack of plates without looking back at me once.
"LB, what's going on?" Alice whispered, turning to me as she and Edward finished up their table.
"I don't know. Someone's got a stick up their ass for no apparent reason."
"Alice, campers are here," Edward called, still not looking at me. I was starting to become really infuriated. Unfortunately, I didn't have time to retaliate because within seconds, our entire table was filled with gossiping campers, happy to be reunited with each other after nine months.
As soon as his table filled up with campers, Edward's frown disappeared, and he became the counselor that I knew and loved. It was the most bizarre thing to watch…ever. How he could change from a scowling, angry grump into a cheerful, supportive counselor, I had no idea. I didn't even know what I had done to warrant such an attitude from him, but I was happy to know that everyone was in my corner, at least.
Alice and Edward had a table filled with the youngest age group—a bunch of adorable eight-year-olds—while Jake and I had to tend to the oldest age group—a hoarde of obnoxious fifteen-year-olds.
They all fawned over Jake; it was pretty sickening. "Ladies. I trust everyone had a fantastic school year?" They all nodded enthusiastically, flipping their hair and batting their eyes at him. Jake wasn't fazed at all. Or he was the most oblivious person to ever exist. Either one. "Has everyone here met LB?" he asked, nodding towards me. A few of them smiled, recognizing me from my time as a camper, while a few shook their heads. "LB used to be a camper, but now she's working at fine arts! She's awesome, so be nice, okay?"
Jake's enthusiasm was contagious, and I soon found myself smiling and introducing myself to everyone at the table. The girls were fairly friendly, but they had far more interest in talking to Jake than me, which I was totally fine with. I spent the entirety of lunch watching Edward interact with the eight-year-olds, anyway.
It was precious, really. He was teaching the little girls all the table cheers they would need to know for the summer. Alice was helping, naturally, since she knew them better than anyone.
"Oh my God, Vanessa, have you seen Edward?" the girl sitting on my left whispered to her friend across the table. Vanessa shook her head and discreetly looked over her shoulder at Edward, who was now participating in the table cheers. He and Alice were laughing and singing and slapping the table enthusiastically—a complete turnaround from mere minutes earlier.
"Le sigh," Vanessa whispered back. "Why does he have to be so hot? And good with kids?"
I ground my teeth and clenched my jaw, trying my hardest to not jump into their conversation. I was screaming in my head that they could keep on dreaming because Edward would never do something as inappropriate as reciprocate a camper's feelings. And then I realized what the fuck I was telling myself. How stupid could I have been to even think that Edward liking me back was a remote possibility? This is what Jasper had been trying to tell me. Edward only knew me as a camper. No wonder he'd been acting like a douche all day; he probably didn't want to lead me on. If I was even half as obvious as these campers, I was sure he knew how I felt about him.
That didn't necessarily excuse his behavior. No. I was still incredibly pissed that he had, in no uncertain terms, called me slutty—no matter how badly I wanted to curl up into his arms and forgive him without question.
"Bell?" Alice whispered as she slid onto the bench next to me. "Are you going to tell me what happened now?"
I shook my head, finally coming to. "Hey, LB, where'd you go?" Jake laughed, finishing up putting the dirty dishes into the dish bin.
"Whoa, is lunch over already?"
Jake's smile disappeared as he slid onto the bench on the other side of me. I was now an Alice/Jake sandwich—the tiny bench we were on was definitely not large enough to accommodate the three of us.
"LB, I'm not going to excuse Edward's behavior, but I am going to apologize for it. He's had a stick up his ass all day, seriously. I don't think it has anything to do with you. And it was really messed up for him to say what he did."
I leaned into Jake's side as he wrapped an arm around my shoulders. "What'd he say?" Alice said, her eyes wide with curiosity.
"Nothing of importance." I brushed her off, but to no avail. Alice wouldn't be denied—I should have known better.
"It obviously was. Right, Jake? What'd he say? Do I need to beat him up? 'Cause I totally will!"
"Pretty boy's just jealous that LB won't let him touch her rack."
"Sure," I scoffed.
"No, really," Jake insisted. "Don't tell him I said anything, but I really think he got jealous this morning. It was weird." Jake pushed off the bench and gave me a hug before pressing another sloppy kiss to my cheek, just as Edward walked by—of course.
He made another sound of disgust and rolled his eyes before heading out of the dining room.
Jake winked and mouthed, "See?" before waving and following Edward out.
Jealousy had been the intended effect, but I didn't think that this would be how Edward showed being jealous. Being an asshole didn't equal being jealous. Right?
"Hey, Bella," Jasper began enthusiastically before he took a large breath and blushed. "Hey, Alice. I didn't see you there." I tried my very hardest not to giggle as the two had a staring contest over me.
"Did you need anything, Jasper?"
"What?" He shook his head, freeing himself from his Alice trance. "Oh, yeah. We don't have any classes scheduled for this afternoon. None of the art shops do—for some reason. And I was wondering if you wanted to come to Wal-Mart with me? We need a few supplies, and I was thinking we could get an iPod adapter or possibly a new radio?"
"Sounds perfect," I breathed. Jasper raised his eyebrow in question—I obviously looked upset—but I just shook my head. "Can we leave now?"
"Yeah—I just need to grab my wallet from my bunk. Want to come?"
"No!" I snapped. "I mean, I'll just wait up here with Alice."
"Oh-kay," Jasper said slowly, emphasizing each syllable, his tone filled with skepticism. "See you in a few."
I nodded curtly as Alice dragged me to the fated Adirondack chair where last night's awkwardness had occurred. I was beginning to think of it as my chair.
"Spill, now," she ordered.
"I wanted to make him jealous, and it backfired."
"Nope. Not what I wanted to hear. What happened last night?" I'd known Alice was going to ask about this. She'd probably been waiting all day to grill me, and I only had minutes to catch her up.
"It was late. I couldn't sleep. Edward and I tried to have a normal conversation, and it didn't work."
"Details, Bella," Alice sighed with impatience. I groaned and leaned my head onto her shoulder, not wanting to look her in the eyes for my latest defeat.
"We sat right here and looked out onto the beautiful moonlit lake. It was romantic and perfect, and we talked about nothing. It was a strain to keep the conversation going. It sucked. It was like we were strangers who just happened to be sitting in close proximity."
"Sometimes that can evolve into a great romance, though. Like Before Sunrise. They were two strangers who fell in love on a bench in one night." I loved that she appealed to my love of film while explaining things to me. It was so undeniably ius/i. But in this situation, she was wrong anyway. The film couldn't translate to my situation. I decided to give her a better example of our situation.
"Well, this was more like Strangers On A Train, if you catch my drift. And the way Edward's been behaving today, I would be the creepy guy murdering him."
"Bella," Alice said seriously—a rare thing for her. "What happened? I thought Jake was going to strangle Edward just then. I mean, they fight a lot, but this was different."
I sighed and turned my body towards her. "He said that if I didn't want guys groping me, then I shouldn't give them an open invitation to do so. Apparently, Edward thinks that I've been acting like a total slut."
"He said WHAT?" Alice screeched, hopping off the Adirondack and heading toward the boys' bunk.
"Alice, calm down! Please! Don't make this into a big deal. It was my fault anyway. The whole thing at breakfast—it was an ill-advised attempt to make him jealous. Clearly it didn't work."
"It was two hundred percent not your fault, Bella. This morning was a joke. Everyone knew that! And if Edward can't handle that, then Jake is right—he is jealous. He's just being a goddamn fool, too."
"Thanks, Alice. That really helps," I said sarcastically, not feeling even remotely better about Edward's newfound attitude problem.
"You haven't been acting like a slut, FYI. Not even close."
"Thanks, although I was having a shitty day before that. Edward was just the last straw."
"Campers?"
"Campers," I sighed. "Thirteen year olds aren't my forte."
"It'll be okay, Bella. You're successful in everything you do, so I have faith."
"Thanks," I said, finally cracking a smile and wrapping Alice into my arms. All of a sudden, I knew what I needed—what would make this afternoon a hundred times better.
"Al?" She perked up, her eyes tilted towards my face. "Do you know what we need?"
"What?" she asked excitedly.
"To roll down the front hill!" With that, Alice's smile widened exponentially. I grabbed both of her hands and walked closer to the edge of the hill.
Long Lake Camp was situated on a massive hill. The dining room and the girls' cabins were all at the top of the hill, while most of the activities and the boys' bunks were on the slope, which ended in a beach that led out to the lake. Alice and I had discovered our first summer here that there was no better pick-me-up than rolling down the front hill with your best friend. And it was exactly what I needed right now. I needed to roll Edward's attitude right out of my system.
We both crouched down onto the ground before shooting off, rolling down the hill with abandon. It was amazing—and exactly what I needed. I closed my eyes and relished the feeling of the cool grass whipping by my skin, acting like a soft carpet beneath my swiftly moving body. Halfway down the hill, my speed picked up. I rolled faster and faster; I felt like I was flying. I held my breath, knowing that this was the final stretch. Finally, my body rolled to a stop, sprawling out on the grass. I felt completely elated and satisfied, endorphins and adrenaline pulsing through my blood. A small smile graced my lips as I heard a giggling Alice coming to a stop just past me.
I opened my eyes slowly, not wanting to ruin the newfound feeling of happiness, and reality came crashing back down. Staring down at me were the green eyes I had tried to roll away from in the first place, although now his face was adorned with a crooked grin instead of a scowl. He reached a hand down and helped me back into a standing position.
As soon as I was standing, I snatched my hand back angrily. Helping me up does not an apology make.
"Shit, Bella…I—" he began.
"I don't want to hear it. I have to go. Jasper's waiting. Later, Alice." I waved as Alice skipped off to the dance studio, and I turned to Jasper.
"Actually, I kind of said that he could come…" Jasper looked apologetically at me, holding up his hands defensively. I looked between the two of them, and I knew that I was shit out of luck. "Sorry, Bella. I didn't know. Is it okay if he comes?"
I growled loudly, completely frustrated. "Fine, but I get shotgun." Edward nodded quickly, looking a bit scared of me. Good. As he should be. There's no excuse for being an unprovoked dickwad.
I slid into the front seat as Edward climbed into the back, still looking unsure. Ignoring him was harder than I'd thought it was going to be; my eyes wanted to look back at him. To keep myself distracted, I brought up the one line of conversation I was sure would lead to an interesting discussion.
"So, Jasper," I began, "What's the deal with you and Alice?"
Jasper's eyes betrayed nothing as he calmly responded, "There is no deal."
Edward scoffed from the backseat, and I had to resist the urge to turn around and smack him. "Sure…" he mumbled.
"I know that no one wants to believe me, but we're friends. We have next to nothing in common—"
"Except for the fact that you both want to jump each other's bones," I laughed. Jasper lost his calm demeanor for a second, his eyes widening in shock before looking back at the road.
Edward took Jasper's hesitation as a good moment to jump in. "Why do you say that, LB? Has Alice said something?" I didn't turn around, but I could hear the smile in Edward's voice. Back to our playful banter.
"Not flat out," I teased back. "But she's been my best friend for ten years. I saw that staring match earlier. Trust me, Jasper, she's been undressing you with her eyes since she first laid eyes on you."
"She has not…"
I smiled widely, feeling in a better mood already. I moved my hand and placed it on Jasper's knee and leaned in to whisper in his ear. "She has, too, and why wouldn't she? What's stopping you?"
Apparently that was as far as I could push Jasper, because his eyes went mellow again as he nodded (mostly to himself) before he started prodding at me. "So, can we talk about what's bothering you today?"
"Yeah, can we?" I joked, my tone exemplifying my mock enthusiasm about the topic that I had clearly tried to avoid.
"Maybe we should—" Edward started in, but I didn't give him the opportunity to finish. We weren't going to hash out whatever was up his ass in front of Jasper, so I changed the topic.
"Ugh, can we talk about thirteen-year-old girls for a second? And how much I despise them? That's what's been bothering me today. Do either of you want to know anything about the Jonas Brothers? Because I'm now a resident expert. After listening to my cabin's conversation—just while unpacking—I found out that Nick is the real talent of the band, and he's coming out with his own solo album, but the band isn't breaking up. Oh, and did you know that he wrote their first hit, SOS, in ten minutes? And he's dated Miley Cyrus and Selena Gomez? Oh, and his nickname is Mr. President? And he has juvenile diabetes? I mean, good God! Was I this bad when I was a camper? If I was, I am truly sorry…" I rambled, going on and on, hoping that this line of conversation would be innocent enough. Plus, I really had learned enough about Nick Jonas today to write a book. Not that I would.
I looked up, only to see Edward and Jasper with their mouths hanging open. "What?" I asked, feeling exasperated. They both started laughing at my obvious frustration, finally cutting the awkward tension in the car.
"That's hilarious, Bella," Jasper wheezed through his laughter. "And I don't know about how you were when you were a camper, but we do have someone in the car who was there for that. Edward, was she that bad?"
"No way," Edward said, shaking his head. "I don't think I ever heard LB obsess about anything other than her work. She was always a bit ahead of the curve, though, so I don't know…"
I blushed at Edward's praise. I knew he was trying to make up for being an asshole before, and it was working. I felt ashamed of the fact that I was putty in his hands, but it was just a natural reaction. Jasper noticed my blush, of course, and felt like he had to further this awkward conversation. Since I had properly humiliated him, it was now my turn. Thanks, Jasper. Another reason why you and Alice would make the perfect tag team.
"Do you really mean to tell me you weren't obsessed with a boy when you were thirteen?" Jasper laughed. I didn't like where this line of questioning was leading, but there was nothing I could do to stop it. "Come on, Bella. I find that hard to believe."
"Yeah, Bella," Edward jumped in. "Who were you in love with when you were thirteen?"
You! I wanted to scream, but I resisted, trying to think of any other answer. "I don't know," I stuttered, my words seeming to get trapped behind my teeth.
"Liar," Jasper accused. "I see that blush, Bella Swan." At his words, my blush only intensified, causing Jasper to laugh harder. Curiosity finally got the best of him, and Edward leaned forward from his seat in the back to inspect my pink-tinged cheeks.
"Wow," Edward breathed so low that I was surprised that I could even hear it over Jasper's laughter. "You are blushing. It can't be that embarrassing, Bella. Who was it?"
I turned my head to look at him and was startled at his proximity to my face—only inches away. Edward's green eyes seemed to be burning into my brown ones. My mind went blank as I took in his unadulterated scent, the pheromones doing crazy things to my body—like send goosebumps down my spine and a feeling of dampness…elsewhere.
"I…uh…it was, um…" I trailed off, racking my brain for anyone—any other person—to say. "Jake Gyllenhaal," I answered with confidence. "Yeah, Jake Gyllenhaal. I had just seen Donnie Darko, and it changed my life. I remember being really jealous of Jena Malone for kissing him. And then she got to kiss Hayden Christiansen in Life Is A House, and I was even more jealous." The more I thought about it, the more worked up I got. "And then she got to hook up with Patrick Fugit in Saved. Wow, I just realized how jealous I am of Jena Malone."
"Jake Gyllenhaal?" Edward looked suspicious. "Really?"
"There seems to be a pattern there," Jasper laughed again.
"Pattern?"
"Yeah. Jake, Hayden, and Patrick? They're all tall, dark, and whiney."
"More like tall and artistic with beautiful blue eyes," I said, defending myself.
"You have a thing for blue eyes?" Jasper batted his bright blue eyes at me as he pulled into a parking spot, having finally arrived at Wal-Mart.
"No." I jumped out of the car, hoping to end this conversation before it turned against me.
"No?" Now Edward was jumping in again. Fuck. I was running myself in circles.
"No! I guess I like light eyes in general." At that, both Edward and Jasper's smiles widened. "Can we just leave it alone? I'm not asking you guys about either of your types…"
"Black hair, blue eyes," Jasper responded quickly. Of course.
"Brown hair, brown eyes." I turned to Edward in surprise, trying not to think about the fact that I was supposedly his type. For as long as I'd known him, I'd thought he always preferred blondes. This was news to me. He paused and rubbed his jaw. "Like Natalie Portman," he clarified. Ah, yes. Only the most beautiful person to walk this planet.
"Right," Jasper said with a smug smile.
"Right." Edward and Jasper shared some secret look, and I wondered what the hell that was all about. Edward was just seriously bipolar today. I would have to chock it up to that.
"Are we going to stand out here all day, or are we actually going to go inside?" I asked, pretending to be annoyed. Jasper gestured for me to go ahead, and I went in, leaving them behind. They looked as if they were discussing something serious, so I decided to head towards the clothing section while I waited for Jasper.
I automatically went to the little-boy section of clothing. They always had the best t-shirts, and if I got the largest size, they still fit. I was deciding between a Transformers t-shirt that read, "Autobots Roll Out," and a Batman t-shirt, which had Batman's mask on it made up of tiny bats—it was super cool—when I heard his voice behind me.
"Definitely the Batman one."
"I'm still mad at you," I said, without even turning around. He put his hand on my elbow, sending sparks shooting down my arm again. I wanted to cry; this wasn't right. He had an unfair advantage.
"I know," he said solemnly. I had never seen Edward serious. It was kind of weird. "I'm sorry, though. I really am. It's a sad excuse, but I woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning, so to speak."
"That's a terrible excuse." I was unimpressed by this apology so far. I began to walk away to find Jasper when Edward pulled me back again.
"Wait, Bella, please." I turned around and was met with his apologetic eyes once again. "I didn't mean what I said before." At least he had the decency to look ashamed. "I was pissed off at Jake, and you were collateral damage, which is really stupid—believe me, I know. And I'm sorry that I'm not Emmett and everything can't be fixed with a box of oreos and a tub of frosting, but maybe we could walk down the food aisles and come up with our own tradition?"
"Fine," I grumbled. He grabbed my hand, as if it were the most natural thing in the entire world, and we both looked startled. I brought my eyes up to his, and he looked pissed again. I wasn't completely sure what Jake had done this morning, but I figured that it had to have been pretty bad to get Edward this angry. And though I was letting him off more than easy, I knew I couldn't actually stay mad at Edward. He could probably be an ass all he wanted and I would take it—because I didn't know how to not like him.
We walked down the food aisles hand in hand, until Edward came to an abrupt stop, picking a tub off the shelf. "Fluff? What the fuck is this shit?"
I gasped. "You've never eaten marshmallow fluff?" I asked, appalled. Edward looked at me out of the corner of his eye and smiled bashfully, shaking his head. "That's terrible, Edward. Every person should have a fluffer-nutter sandwich."
"Fluffer what now?"
"Fluffer-nutter—peanut butter and fluff sandwich?" Edward made a face.
"I don't really like peanut butter…"
"Who doesn't like peanut butter? Freak."
"My sister used to put it on everything when I was little. And I mean everything. It was the most disgusting thing in the world. Peanut butter and pickles, peanut butter and meat, peanut butter and—"
"You have a sister?" I interrupted. How had I not known that?
"Um, yeah. Two, actually. I'm the baby." He blushed, looking appropriately adorable.
"What are their names?"
"Tanya and Kate. Tanya lives in Vermont, and Kate actually lives in Los Angeles."
I thought for a second. "Do you like sweet and salty?" He looked confused at the jump in the conversation, so I clarified. "Like french fries dipped in a milkshake?"
"Oh my God, yes," he moaned, forgetting his sisters immediately. His eyes rolled back into his head in pleasure, sending shock waves straight to my sad and lonely clit just at the sight of him. "I lived off A&W root beer floats and fries while I was working on my senior thesis."
Smiling, I grabbed the tub of fluff from his hand and found a box of the long, stick kind of pretzels. "Trust me," I laughed, squeezing our still-joined hands, trying to appease his skeptical face.
"You should get some for your bunk," he suggested. I turned to face him, wondering where that comment had come from. "All the older girls think the coolest counselors are the ones that bring them food—'cause it's illegal." He winked.
"That's actually a great idea," I agreed, grabbing a box of cookies from the shelf. It was definitely a way to get into their good graces. Edward was a genius. "Thanks."
"There you guys are!" Jasper was out of breath, clearly having run all over the super store before finally finding us. He already had a radio and an iPod connector in his hands, and I felt bad for having left him to his own devices. But looking back at Edward's devilishly handsome smile, I suddenly wasn't so sorry.
"Sorry, Jasper. I, um, got distracted?" He looked at my armload of food with amusement. "Clearly. So, are we ready to check out?"
"Oh, fuck. I just have to grab a hoodie, and then I'll be ready. Meet you at the checkout?" Jasper and I nodded, and with that, Edward was off.
"Want to tell me what that was all about?" Jasper asked quietly.
"Not particularly." I smiled innocently.
"So that's how you're going to play it, huh?" I kept smiling and didn't respond. "I had a very interesting conversation with Edward last night," Jasper continued, trying to pique my curiosity—which it did, obviously. I tried my best to act nonchalant.
"Oh, really? What about?"
"Wouldn't you like to know." He smirked knowingly.
"You're really not going to tell me?" I asked, feeling put out. How could he tease me like that and then not follow through?
"Let's just say that Edward needed someone to vent to at three o'clock in the morning. I was asleep, but his need was so dire that he woke me up. I wonder what could have caused such a crisis?" He laughed, goading me with his every statement.
All his cryptic statements weren't lost on me, though. Edward's freak-out hadn't started this morning—it had started last night. Last night after our moment. I tried to piece together everything that Jasper had just said, but I was definitely still missing something. If anything, though, this was a positive turn.
Edward was already at the checkout line when Jasper and I strolled up. He put his hoodie down on the counter, along with the Batman shirt I'd been looking at earlier. Without a word, he took the food from my arms and placed it next to it next to the shirt before getting out his wallet.
"Edward, you don't—"
"It's all part of the apology, Bella. Just let me do this. Please." His eyes begged me to comply. Who was I to oppose his hospitality?
"Thanks."
He smiled, a genuine smile, but then he ran his hand through his hair—a sure sign of stress. I wasn't sure what he could be stressed about, but I had a feeling that it was somehow connected to me. Not to sound egocentric, but…it all fit. Edward Cullen was acting all crazy bipolar because of me. I could only hope that he was going to come to terms with whatever was bothering him soon. Otherwise, I had a feeling that I'd be in for a lot of Assward and fluff-with-pretzel apologies over the next few weeks.
Not wanting to gain fifteen pounds or deal with his bitchy comments, I silently prayed for the former option.
Chapter End Notes:
Serious question—do you want to stay in BPOV, see this day from EPOV, or switch to EPOV but continue on? Trust me when I tell you, there's a LOT going on in the very near future :)
Mmmkay, enjoy New Moon, my pretties. I know I will…over and over and over.
Review, and don't forget to also stop by the thread—we're starting to have some fun over there ;)
http://www(dot)twilighted(dot)?f=44&t=7126
MWA!