Chapter Five: Ill

Dib sat in the control room alone, peering out at the beautiful dark. He didn't see it quite the same as he used to. Every star seemed like it could hold either something good or something bad. He was almost too afraid to find out now. Every planet seemed to deliver something bad to them, despite the outer beauty. Dib hoped they would be all right on Earth. They could find a distant place where the Meekrob weren't around. Or they could keep Zim on the ship if they had to. But Dib knew they had to land soon, being in space was freaking Zim out too much. He kept waking up thinking that they were under attack from space pirates. It really worried Dib.

It claimed thousands of lives every year. It caused pandemics. It was causing Dib's heart to break right now. Zim was utterly sick. Really, really sick. It even made Gir turn away, and he was a robot. At first Dib thought it was the flu, but he ran Zim's DNA through the ship's computer. It seemed like a combination of Earth diseases and foreign ones Dib didn't recognize.

Zim seemed like he was in pain, though he kept saying he was just fine and ignoring the thought that something might be wrong. But he was so weak too, he mostly slept now. He had already been sleeping a lot, but never this much before. Dib figured it was good for Zim's system to be asleep though. Skoodge was trying to be helpful, but the thing was…that he wasn't. Skoodge tried to cook and tried to help with Zim, but he wasn't very good at accomplishing things. Earlier when Zim was done puking his guts out, Dib took him to the infirmary of the ship, leaving everyone else in the front room. Rin had gone back to the controls and Gir was playing with something. The only one left without anything to do was Skoodge, who mopped the floor. Dib had to admit; Skoodge could at least do that right. In the end though, Dib finally just told him to patrol outside the med room where Zim was.

Finally Earth was in Dib's view. He didn't know whether to be excited or nervous, he ended up being both. Who knew what would happen on the planet. Maybe something bad, but there was one reason Dib was excited, Zim might find some help on Earth. If nothing else, then peace. Dib went to see Rin about landing. "Hey Rin," He said, watching her cut up something that looked like vegetables.

"Good evening, Dib," Rin said cheerily.

"What are you doing?" Dib asked curiously.

"Making soup. I learned how to when I lived on Earth," Rin told him. She seemed so content to be doing something so mundane.

"So, where should we land? We need an unpopulated place with okay living conditions," Dib said to the android. They needed a place with minimal people and not too hot or cold, so Zim wouldn't get worse. Rin's eyes went blank as she looked, wirelessly, through the ships computer files. Dib waited and watched as Rin turned around wordlessly to the map of Earth on the wall behind her and pointed to somewhere in the middle of the United States. "Good work, Rin," Dib said proudly.

"There are no Meekrob and plenty of available supplies," Rin reported, "I'll go set the coordinates." Dib nodded and watched her leave.

…

Zim glared up at the harsh white lights above. It was far too bright there, how was Zim supposed to sleep or even think. It was too cold too; Zim was freezing cold and extremely uncomfortable sitting on the white infirmary bed. Even though he had boasted of surviving below freezing weather and coming from a planet colder than anything, in several ways…Zim felt that his type of cold was just…wrong. He was hot and cold at the same time, and it made his head spin. His skin was so warm and he was sweating…but it was still so cold…Zim wished Dib would hurry up and come make him warm again. Dib was spending so much time away and it bothered Zim deeply. Dib was his, and he needed to be here.

Skoodge was outside the door, but that wasn't enough to satisfy Zim. Skoodge tended to be useless when asked to help. Which was why Dib needed to be here, right now. Zim coughed weakly, the small action making his throat rip and burn. It had finally calmed down too, the pain. Sitting still was good, less painful. The spasms of coughing and moving were difficult to push down, but it was worth it, otherwise was more than Zim could deal with.

He was sitting on the edge of the bed, facing the door in wait for Dib. But his body was failing him…getting exhausted with the effort of sitting up and being conscious. Zim didn't want to lay down, didn't want to move. If he moved, he knew a new threshold of pain would be brought down upon his head. Earlier when he wasn't aware of it, Zim had been pacing and moving around, but that made his head hurt horribly. If he moved even a little, the intense headache that was sleeping would awaken and beam into life, making Zim miserable.

There was one good thing about this room, Zim decided. It was sterile. The room was clean and germ-free. Which made Zim relax, somewhat. Ever since that incident long ago involving germs and meat…Zim was a little on edge about filth. But this place made him feel…safe. If only Dib would come now, this place would be more bearable. Now matter how clean this room could be, Zim still wanted out. And more than he wanted out, he wanted Dib. He wanted to march out of the room and order Dib to come in…but he knew he couldn't do that. No matter how much he lied to himself and to Dib, Zim was still just a damaged soldier. So he waited in attempted patience.

…

Oh they would pay. This was worse than anything Dib had done to annoy her. The Irkens gawked and laughed at her, pointing their ugly little fingers at her. She glared at them to no avail; they all knew she could do nothing to them. Gaz was a servant to the Irken Empire. She wondered why they didn't just kill her; it was a huge mistake on their part, although they had chosen a fitting duty for her.

Gaz had always hated dresses, except for black ones at Hot Topic. And, true, this dress was black, but it was too small. The bottom of it was a tutu, which was bad enough, but it was higher than it should have been, showing her black, lace panties to all who wished to see. The upper half was like a tank-top, but more revealing, her bra was quite visible. Over all, Gaz felt like a whore. Her 'service' didn't help that thought.

…

Red and Purple were very entertained, taking in the sight of the former Earth-Queen. The small glass box was visible to all the Irkens aboard the Massive. Inside the box was a girl and a pole, the girl was forced to serve the tallest by swinging herself around the pole. A form of dancing on Earth. Rather than accepting the attention and being happy to be graced with Irken viewers, the girl glared out maliciously at the crowd, as if promising death.

"This is really fun," Purple noted.

"Yeah, it is," Red agreed.

"Hey, popcorn!" Purple yelled out of distraction.

…

Zim was nearly asleep when Dib walked in ominously. Zim snapped awake and glared at him, although in his state it was more like staring than glaring. Glaring took too much energy, so Zim stared, wishing Dib would pick up on Zim's irritation. Dib just stood there awkwardly, as if he didn't want to be there, he wasn't even looking at Zim. "W-we're gonna land soon…" Dib informed him.

"Land where?" Zim asked, hoping Dib would stay and not leave him alone in the room again.

"Earth," Dib said in a hollow tone, making Zim's antenna perk up.

"Earth?" Zim asked. Had he heard right? Earth, what was Dib thinking?

"The safest place is in the eye of the storm," Dib mumbled. Zim ignored the strange Earth phrase he didn't understand and took in Dib's weary appearance, how his words held no strength or conviction.

"Dib-beast!" Zim snapped. Dib jumped, but still refused to look at Zim. "Why won't you look at me, dammit?" Zim asked angrily. Dib looked down at his feet, ashamed. But he didn't answer or look at Zim, and Zim was more impatient than usual. "Filthy HYUMAN! What's wrong with you!" Zim yelled. It hurt him badly to burst like that, rubbing his throat like sandpaper and beating his head like a drum. But it was worth it.

Dib growled in frustration and started to pace, still not glancing at Zim. "What's wrong with me? With me, Zim? Just look at yourself!" Dib yelled as though Zim were missing something obvious.

"I can see myself, idiot! It's you I want to look at me!" Zim snapped at him.

"No, you're the idiot! I can't believe you!" Dib yelled with an emotion Zim couldn't place. Dib calmed down and stood still. "Try and imagine what I'm feeling right now, seeing you this way…" Dib whispered. Zim was glad Dib stopped yelling, it was hurting his head. But he peered at Dib, sensing something…off about him.

Imagine what he's feeling. What was Dib feeling? Zim couldn't place it. He honestly hadn't thought of that until now. But he observed Dib's face carefully. Zim remembered this from somewhere. When Dib's parental unit was killed, that was this face. But Dib wasn't dying, and the ship was safe. But Gaz got kidnapped. "Dib, we'll get her back, Gaz will be fine," Zim assured him. Zim failed to save Gaz, and now Dib was paying for that. Zim failed, and now Dib wouldn't look at him. Now he'd have to rescue her, if not for his pride, then for Dib.

As soon as Zim said the words though, Dib laughed. Something sparked in his eyes, remembrance maybe, and Dib covered his face with his hands. "Oh God, Zim," He moaned with laughter in his voice. "Only you can be so arrogant and modest at the same time…" Zim watched as Dib started to tremble. It was so confusing, Dib was showing so many emotions, it wasn't clear what he was upset about.

Zim got up, wincing and ignoring the pain that followed, and slowly made his way towards Dib. Dib hadn't heard Zim get up, so when Zim poked Dib in the head, he jumped and glanced at Zim in surprise. Zim almost grinned in victory, but Dib's shocked and hurt face stopped him. Dib seemed worse up close. Zim attempted a sympathetic look. "Dib…what's wrong?" Zim asked again, more softly.

Dib almost crumpled at being so close to Zim now, but Zim wanted to know something, so Dib remained standing. He tried to pull himself together so Zim wouldn't be more worried than he already was. "It's nothing, Zim…really. I'm sorry that I…yeah," Dib said, composing himself. Zim stared at him, obviously not understanding. "I'm just…worried. About you," Dib said, adding the last part so Zim wouldn't get confused again.

Zim's mind was a cloudy mass of sleep, anxiety and pain. He gazed up at Dib, not really catching his words. But Zim admired Dib's warmth. It was in his eyes and his voice and his body radiated it, welcoming Zim. Just as Zim felt he was about to pass out… "I'm just…worried. About you." That made Zim think. It didn't make sense that Dib would worry over Zim. Gaz was the one in the arms of the Irken Empire. Zim was just…damaged. His body would fix itself in a day. Dib knew that, so he shouldn't be worried. Unless there was something worry about. Maybe Dib knew something, like that Zim couldn't be repaired.

"If you're worried," Zim mumbled, sleepily, "You should stay." Zim leaned into the warmth of Dib and closed his eyes, hoping the warmth wouldn't go away. If Zim was going to die, he wanted it to be with Dib. He was so angry at the Empire for what they did to Zim and to Gaz. They probably did something horrible to Gaz, who knew. But what was worst of all, was the way Dib was taking it all. Zim felt strong, steady hands on his backside, pressing him closer, enveloping him in warmth. Zim grinned, dib was finally here, finally driving the cold away.

"I'm so sorry, Zim," Dib murmured, pressing tighter. "So…sorry." Zim shook his head, Dib wasn't the one who should be sorry, but he was too tired to explain that to Dib. Zim nuzzled Dib's chest and hoped he got the message.

Dib watched his alien beside him. Zim seemed so sleepy and serene with Dib so near. He was sorry, too. Sorry that in a minute he would have to leave again and Zim would be so mad, he could just stay, but it hurt too much. This all made Dib think of the past, and the past was filled with scary things.

…

Mini-moose floated around his new home. The space shit was a lot different from the inside of Gir's head, where he'd been trapped for who knows how many months. He finally escaped earlier when Gir found some rocks to put in his head instead. Now Mini-moose wandered, hoping there were no other life forms so terrifying as Gir.

"What are you?" A lazy voice asked itself above. Mini-moose looked up from the floor he was floating just above to see the speaker. He was a rather large squat Irken with a dirty uniform. He had glassy red eyes like Zim, except they seemed to hold less violence in them. Mini-moose squeaked at him, praying to Jashin that this person was nice. "Mini-moose? Oh yeah, you belong to Zim, I remember now. Remember me? I'm Skoodge," the Irken said happily. Mini-moose had forgotten over the years. He wondered where Skoodge had been for all that time that he been supposedly living in their basement. Oh well, things happen.

Mini-moose squeaked excitedly. If anyone could save him from Gir, it was Skoodge. Skoodge was equally as happy, the little purple creature had something, there was something in his eyes that compelled Skoodge to protect him. Finally, he thought, a duty that doesn't involve Zim.

…

It was feeding time, and at least the Irkens knew how to eat. They gave Gaz time to herself in a locked room with no one else watching her. This put her in a good mood, but what was even better was the food. Pizza, soda, donuts, soft pretzels. It didn't seem healthy, but it tasted amazing after a long day, or a couple of Irk hours, of being a pole dancer on a foreign planet.

Gaz didn't know why they put her in a room by herself to eat. Either it was mercy, or they were too disgusted by her eating. She pretended it was the latter. She wouldn't accept mercy, she wasn't weak like that. She would never let anyone see her in pain like that. Someone down the hall shrieked in pain. Gaz smirked and looked at the door. "Whiner."

…

Dib looked at his surroundings, this place used to be Nevada. He thought the desert had been empty before…but now it was edging on a wasteland. They were near a town though, it seemed small and devoid of Meekrob. It would have to do. Dib went back inside to get Rin. The Irkens would stay in the ship while Rin and Dib checked out the town.

Zim, of course, was furious at the idea of being left behind and not included in the 'mission.' He would've snuck out, but Dib locked him in the infirmary to steam by himself. Zim, for some reason or another, still couldn't see why Dib was worried about him so much. Dib wanted to just yell his love at Zim, but an emotional scene would take a lot of time and wear both of them out.

Dib and Rin quickly left the ship before Gir knew they were leaving. Gir was another problem altogether. But thankfully they made it without him. Dib and Rin walked towards the town cautiously in silence. Dib almost recognized the dusty signs, remembering them from long ago. He had seen them on TV and a couple of times in person when his dad flew them out there to see some fabulous machine he'd made. The eerie silence bothered Dib, but Rin was unaffected. She was scanning for life forms in the ghost town.

"Dib, there's a small group of humans over there," Rin told him, pointing to a building. Dib looked, it didn't seem like there would be anyone living there. Most of the buildings were collapsing and damaged. And the building she pointed out was one of the worse ones. Dib was starting to doubt her until he felt the hot prick of a weapon held to his throat.

…

Anger, sickness and boredom permeated the air of the room. It smelled bad, but Zim ignored the smell. He was leaned against the door, sitting on the floor. The surfaces were cold and prickled his skin, but his anger was enough that he forgot how cold the room was. Dib had left him here alone. Zim was fuming, freezing, aching and lonely, and Dib left him here.

He tried to force the thought away, but Dib reminded Zim of someone. A person who left Zim in a small cold room alone to suffer. Dib was becoming like the person they both had once hated. Zim wasn't sure how Dib would take this news. Maybe he wouldn't tell Dib, yeah that was best. Most human teenagers were very agitated when told they're like their parental units.

…

Much time later…

"Skoodge!" Zim yelled hoarsely through the door for the hundredth time. Skoodge looked at the door sympathetically, Zim had been yelling for Skoodge to unlock him ever since he found out Skoodge was nearby. But Skoodge knew that he couldn't do that, not until Dib came back. Skoodge was on strict orders.

"Skoodge! Fucking let me out right now! You pussy! You bastard! Open this door!" Zim yelled. Skoodge wondered how the sick Irken had the energy to do that. He was a little worried about Zim's extreme anger, but he was probably madder that no one was obeying him rather than being locked in a room. He didn't see what the big deal was. It was nice and cold with lots of light, just like back home…except during the blackouts Zim caused, of course. It was strange for an Irken to just change preferences like that. Maybe Dib changed Zim.

Ignoring Zim's next few shouts, Skoodge looked around. There was a bulletin board of calendars. He looked at the Irken one, disappointed that no events were near yet. But something colorful on Earth's calendar caught his eyes. "Hey Zim!" Skoodge called out, interrupting Zim's current tirade. "Guess what today is!"

"…" Zim stopped yelling and the ship fell into an uneasy silence. Skoodge shifted uncomfortably, knowing Zim sometimes took a while to think things through. He hoped Zim hadn't taken offense to Skoodge's question. "Friday?" Zim asked, barely audible compared to his yelling.

"Er, no," Skoodge said, on Earth it was actually Tuesday anyway.

"Lies!" Zim yelled unexpectedly. Skoodge doubted that Zim even knew what day it was.

"It's Christmas Eve!" Skoodge told him excitedly. Skoodge loved Earth holidays, especially Christmas. They were just so happy compared to Irk. Zim however growled in anger and disgust.

"Ugh! That stupid thing again! I hate it!" Zim yelled. Skoodge leaned against the wall and closed his eyes. This type of yelling from Zim was normal.

"Dib doesn't think it's stupid," Skoodge pointed out. Zim was silent, contemplating it. Skoodge took that time to hopefully make the holiday easier. "You should get Dib something for Christmas," He suggested. "Since you two seem so close now."

"Like what?" Zim asked more calmly.

"Mm, I don't know. I don't know anything about humans," Skoodge sighed.

"You've been stalking us for how long and you don't know anything about humans!" Zim yelled in frustration.

Skoodge shrugged, not caring that Zim couldn't see the action. "What does he like?" Skoodge asked. Zim was silent for a minute.

"Paranormal stuff," Zim said sheepishly.

"Uh huh," Skoodge prodded, wanting Zim to go on.

"And food," Zim muttered, trying to remember what they used to do on Earth and when they were on vacation.

"All humans eat food," Skoodge pointed out. Zim stayed silent. "You'll figure it out," He assured, Zim was too sick and under stress from Earth being in danger and Dib wandering around to possibly think of a Christmas gift.

"A collar," Zim said coldly, the anger and betrayal in his voice startling Skoodge.

"W-why t-that?" Skoodge asked timidly, afraid to know.

"So he can't fucking LEAVE! So he can't leave me all alone in this FUCKING ROOM!" Zim burst out in sudden anger. Over the years Zim had gotten somewhat calmer, but now Skoodge could see him old tension and anger coming back. Skoodge was honestly scared, hoping Dib would come back soon to calm Zim down.

"WeeeeeeeI!" A shrill scream filled the hallway. Skoodge really hoped it wasn't what he thought it was.

"Hey," Gir said with surprising calmness as he stood before Skoodge.

"H-hey," Skoodge said, backing away.

"WANNA MUFFIN?" Gir asked, arms flailing.

"S-sure, Gir," He sighed, happy that was all that Gir wanted. Gir popped a plastic pig out of his head and sat on the floor with it. While Zim was getting angrier, Gir was becoming calmer. Adding Dib definitely changed things. Though for the better or worse, Skoodge couldn't decide.

"GIR!" Zim yelled, making Skoodge pay more attention. "Open the door!" Zim ordered. Skoodge didn't move to stop Gir, thinking the defective robot wouldn't actually do anything. Gir jumped up and smashed the hinges on the door and peeled it out to fall to the floor.

Skoodge was stunned, first of all, surprised that Gir followed an order for once. Second, how unnecessary was it to break the door when he could have just unlocked it instead. Third, the amount of hate and turmoil was in the glare Skoodge was receiving from Zim.

He ran as fast as he could as Zim jumped on Gir's back and came flying at Skoodge. "I'm sorry!" Skoodge yelled, fleeing from the deranged Irken.

…

Two hours later…

Zim and Skoodge had found a couch and TV somewhere within the ship and sat down. Zim was still pissed at Skoodge, but at least now he was too tired to do anything. That and Gir got distracted along the way and left to make pasta. Skoodge thought human television was amazing. All the shows gravitated around stupidity, randomness and boredom. Especially the reality shows, they were the best. Zim merely glared at the screen.

"Come on Zim, lighten up!" Skoodge said, nudging him. Zim's eyes remained on the screen as he dug an elbow deep into Skoodge's middle. He might be sick and dying, but he could still kick Skoodge's ass.

"Not 'til Dib comes back," Zim growled.

"He's just protecting you…" Skoodge defended. He liked Dib, he was reasonable and didn't cause senseless violence.

"Pfff…" Zim stopped paying attention and slumped even more on the couch. Skoodge gave up and just watched the TV screen. They were about halfway through a designing show with some blonde guy named Austin when something happened to the TV.

"Even when all of mankind has gone commando, we can still make military look stylin'," Austin said, pulling out some fabric. He did something cute and then jumped into a bigger guy's arms. Skoodge was loving it. He never thought a military uniform could look so good. Zim just looked bored.

"Silly poofs…" Zim mumbled. Skoodge didn't bother to ask what Zim meant, since Zim probably made up his own slang as he went along anyway. But when he turned back to the TV screen, Austin was gone, replaced by the back of a chair.

"Hey…what happened?" Skoodge questioned, picking up the remote.

Zim sighed. "Someone hacked into the system and is now transmitting a live video feed…stupid." Skoodge stared a Zim for what must have been a full minute before turning back to the TV and seeing that what Zim said was true. The person in the chair turned around to face them. Skoodge gasped, Zim yawned.

"Hello boys," Gaz said calmly.

"G-Gaz! We thought you got kidnapped!" Skoodge burst out.

Gaz stared at Skoodge, he realized that they'd never officially met before, what with him stalking them and so on. "Hey. You aren't stalking anymore," Gaz mumbled. Skoodge's face grew hot as Gaz continued. "Where's Dib?" She questioned.

"Um…out. But where are you? How did you escape?" Skoodge asked.

Gaz grinned and cocked her head. "That's a subject for another time, dear stupid Irken. But for now, you should probably be more focused on your location. Irken ships can locate one another, you know? I thought you would know that since you're an Invader…and moreover Irken. But I guess since you're stupid you wouldn't. And you wouldn't know that the Meekrob have the technology to sense Irken property. There is a manual switch to shut the locators off in the ship, but since I still see your presence on my radar, I would guess you don't know how to do that."

Skoodge could say nothing as he listened to Gaz. In his own silence though, he noticed something about the live feed. "So, I would suggest you find Dib and leave, preferably without the aid of Irken tech, since I still need to talk to Dib and what-not. And if Zim dies or becomes imprisoned by my men, well…I suppose he wouldn't much be open for conversation would he?"

"Thank you Queen Gaz, for warning us," Skoodge said, humbly nodding. He glanced at Zim to see that the poor deranged Irken had fallen asleep.

"Whatever, I won't be your Queen much longer. By the way, tell Gir I said hi," Gaz mumbled. Gir came out of nowhere just as the transmission ended.

"NOOOOOOO!" Gir slammed into the TV and started bawling. Skoodge got up to stop him and tell him to be quiet, but one glance at Zim said there would be no need to bother. Zim was out cold, all the yelling and drama and anger finally getting to him. Skoodge doubted he even slept while locked up, what with being so angry at Dib.

"Gaz said hi, Gir," Skoodge uttered, plucking Gir up by his single antenna. Gir let out a squeal of joy and did a little dance while still in mid-air. Skoodge couldn't help but wonder what Gaz meant by she wouldn't be his queen much longer.

Skoodge wondered if he should look for Dib and Rin. They were the most responsible of their group, and yet…they had been gone for a very long time. Maybe searching could wait for just a little while, they probably got lost or something and were right on their way back.

He let Gir back on the floor. Gir, happy once more, pulled a rock out of his head and began banging it on the metal flooring. Skoodge glanced at Zim and wondered how he put up with Gir all the time. Gir was pretty hard to stand, especially now that Gaz wasn't here to occupy him. Chills went up Skoodge's spine as he remembered what he had noticed about Gaz's transmission. The way it was being fed had been far too familiar, but that wasn't the only thing. Gaz had been surrounded by panels of technology and equipment. All of it had been Irken, all of it had been functional. Was Gaz just escaping…or had something far different begun to happen. Did the Tallest brainwash Gaz? Surely not, she wouldn't have been so nice to him otherwise. Then what?

…

…

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Gah! I'm so extremely sorry! I am devious and mean for not posting a chapter in so long! GAH! If you still want to read this fic…then…I-I love you! (Gir tears commence) Ahem. Yeah well. It seems like everyone is busy these past couple months. But now that my school schedule has finally stopped moving around, I promise to try and keep posting again. I promise not to give up on this fic!

BTW. I love that show called "On the Road With Austin and Santino"! They are the most perfect gay couple of all reality television! There I said it! (Starts crying dramatically) Anywho. Hopefully the next chapter will be posted in a reasonable amount of time. Not like two months again XO

(Oh yeah, and I feel special, I finally know what ZaDr stands for! .! I can't believe I never realized that! It's so awesome! XD)