AN: Thank you to everyone who didn't threaten me with violence this past week. I am astounded at everyone's faith in Campward…my favorite was a review that said, "He wouldn't do that…I know him," which made me giggle since I actually do know him.
So, I've given him the chance to tell his side of the day.
Also, before you dig in – there's one more day of voting left in the FML one shot competition. Mine made it to the final round, and if you wanted to go check it out go to…
www . fanfiction . net/u/2187120/FML_Contest#
Okay, keeping it short. Get to it. Love you all tons.
~Edward~
I'd forgotten how much visiting day sucked. It was as if I needed to be everywhere at once, although with Seth helping out, my load was significantly less. I had to admit, for as much as I'd hated the guy originally for liking Bella, could I really blame him? I mean, I'd be the first to admit how beautiful and talented and hilarious and…okay, maybe not first, but at least I had finally admitted it, right?
Camera in hand, I glanced down at the list of stops for the day before I could take off, wondering where the hell I had to go next. I groaned, seeing that the last activity on my list was swim. Rosalie had been giving me shit since returning from Quebec about taking so fucking long to make a move on Bella, and it was grating on my nerves.
When I got down to the docks, Rosalie was already in the lake with her swim group. She was teaching them the proper arm movements for breaststroke. Each time she'd show the movement, though, every father's eyes would go straight to her cleavage, which became more pronounced with each stroke. Did these men have no shame?
Embarrassed by their gratuitous display of staring, I nudged through them to get to the edge of the dock, hoping that I was enough to distract them from their unwavering focus on her chest.
"Hey, Rose." I crouched down and brought my camera up. "Do you mind if I film your group for the swim section?"
She swam under the water quickly, popping up on the edge of the dock with a coy smile. "Edward, you want to film me? Should I be telling someone else about this?"
I barked out a small laugh at her words, though they did have some validity. Filming could definitely have its perks, and I was not going to rule that out for some future activities.
It had been a full day without seeing Bella, and I was beyond ready for this day to end so that I could see her. I'd promised myself, and her, that we'd go slow, but my cock definitely had other ideas…especially as it imagined being videotaped, something I'd surprisingly never done.
While I'd been lost in my thoughts, Rosalie had turned back to her campers and told them to do the exercise for me to film. After about ten minutes of filming, I was confident that I had sufficient footage and made my way back to the shack.
Seth was already there, importing footage, when I arrived.
"So," I began, clapping a hand on his shoulder before pulling up a chair next to him, "how was your visiting day?"
He turned to look at me, smiled, and shook his head. "Not too much fun. I'm not going to lie…it was pretty miserable."
"Sorry. Yeah, it really sucks. I'm fucking exhausted, too." As if on cue, a large yawn erupted from my mouth. "I don't even think I stopped to eat lunch," I realized, suddenly very aware of the gnawing feeling in my stomach.
"You haven't eaten all day?" I shook my head, feeling incredibly stupid. Who forgets to eat? Seth held out a hand and motioned for my camera. "Leave the camera with me. Go get some food, and then go back to your bunk. I'll import the footage and lock up the shack."
"Really?"
Seth rolled his eyes and grabbed the camera from my hand, placing it next to his own, which was currently hooked up to the computer. "Yes. Be gone, please. I'll see you tomorrow." He waved me away with his hand, and I couldn't help but smile genuinely at his offer.
"Thanks, Seth. Have a great night!" I called out as I left the shack and headed straight to the kitchen.
"Edward!" Elizabeth, the head of the kitchen staff called out upon seeing me in the doorway. She was one of my favorite people at camp, and I knew she'd always had a soft spot for me. Normally, counselors weren't allowed into the kitchen at all, but I had come around for more than one late-night snack. Elizabeth had always been more than happy to oblige.
"Hey, Elizabeth, how was the food today?"
Her eyes widened in shock at my question, and she took off running, putting together a plate of food for me before I could even ask for one. "How could he not eat? Today of all days?" she muttered to herself, as she removed the food from the giant refrigerator. "You work so hard, Edward, especially on this day. You need a good girl who will take care of you and make sure you always eat."
I smiled and threw my arm around her shoulders, picking up a chunk of potato salad with my fingers before plopping it into my mouth and licking my fingers clean. "Like you?"
She rolled her eyes. "No, not like me. I have my own man to feed, thank you very much." She chuckled, moved the loaded plate in front of me, and pulled up a stool for me to sit on. My mouth watered at the feast in front of me. I was insanely grateful to finally be able to get some food into my stomach. "No," she continued, "you need a sweet girl who will look out for you but someone who'll also keep you on your toes and not let you get fat."
"Yeah, I'm working on that."
"Sure you are," she said, eyeing me warily.
"No, I really am!"
"Edward, I'll believe that when you bring her back here to meet me, but until then, I refuse to believe that."
Ignoring her rant, I took a large bite of cold fried chicken, which tasted like manna from the gods to my sad, empty stomach.
"Oh my God, Elizabeth, this is amazing," I said with my mouth half-full. "Thank you so much."
"Chew, darling," she laughed, pushing a glass of lemonade in front of me.
I took my time finishing the rest of the plate she'd made me. Every bite was just as delicious as the first, and we talked about nothing and everything, complaining about the hellish day we'd both had. As soon as I'd finished, I kissed her cheek, feeling sated, and made my way to the front porch, hoping to find Bella there.
Unfortunately, since I'd eaten my lunch/dinner/whatever the fuck that meal was, nearly everyone had gone back to their bunks, leaving the front porch abandoned and dark. I was about to head back to my bunk when I saw a flicker of light down by the Fine Arts room.
My inner teenager squealed, and I started jogging towards the light, hoping that Bella was sitting in there waiting for me.
Don't flatter yourself, Cullen. She's definitely not waiting for you…
And I was right. She was definitely not waiting for me. Jasper was the only one in the room, cleaning up the remnants of their busy day while listening to Dave Matthews Band. As I watched him sing along, I briefly wondered if Jasper was a stoner, and if he was, if he would be willing to share with me. I needed to mellow out something fierce.
"Hey," I said. My voice sounded disappointed even to my own ears.
"Oh, hey," Jasper responded, seeing me in the doorway. "Bella ran off a while ago, looking for you, actually."
My heart clenched with excitement. Bella had been looking for me, too. I sighed and ran a hand through my hair. "Did she say where she was going to look?"
Jasper shook his head. "Nah, she said she was just going to wander until she found you. But if you give me a few seconds, I'm almost done here. We can just go back to the bunk. That'll probably be her last stop, I figure."
"You and your logic, Jasper." He laughed as I wagged my finger at him.
"It comes in handy from time to time." With a last sweep of his hand, he stepped back, put his hands on his hips, and shrugged. "Eh, good enough."
With that, he flicked off the lights and locked the door behind us.
"So," he began nervously, "I have a kind of awkward question for you."
My feet slowed down so that I could look at Jasper properly. He was tugging on the hem of his uniform shirt and avoiding eye contact with me at all costs. I felt like Medusa, like he was afraid to look into my eyes for fear of being turned to stone.
Yeah, I like mythology. Get over it.
"Yeah, what's up?"
He cleared his throat and continued to stare at the grass below his feet as we trudged down the hill toward our bunk. "Hypothetically, if I needed to use the bunk and have you not be around…would you be offended if I asked you not to be there?"
"Uh, what?" I asked, confused by Jasper's rambling. He was usually the articulate and logical one, and hearing him sound less-than was giving me a headache.
He suddenly looked up at me and blushed. In fact, he blushed so hard that I could see it clearly, even under the darkening sky. "What I'm trying to say is…." He trailed off, trying to get his bearings, but it clearly wasn't working. Instead, he ended up looking more frustrated and tongue-tied.
"Spit it out, Jasper, come on."
"I, um…I…'tbethere…" He paused and then quickly added, "…soon."
His words were so rushed and closely strung together that it took me a full ten seconds to comprehend what he was trying to ask me. A large smile threatened to overtake my face, but I tried to keep it serious as I responded, "Wait, so, you don't want me to film you guys?"
Jasper's jaw unhinged, and his blush deepened. "I-I...y-you…I-I—"
"Jasper." I gave my obviously wound-up roommate a sincere smile and slapped a hand on his shoulder. "Just give me the word, and I'll be out of your hair. I'm happy for you, man."
He released a long breath and smiled back, finally looking me in the eyes. "Thanks."
I was so wrapped up in Jasper's nerves that I failed to see we'd arrived back in our bunk, and by the time I'd realized what was going on, it was already too late.
My feet stopped in front of my open door, allowing me to take in the scene before me. On top of my bed, with my blankets, were Jake and Emily…completely naked. Emily bounced up and down, making the small twin bed creak with each forceful thrust, while my lazy, slutty jackass of a best friend lay there, his hands guiding Emily onto his hips harder and harder, which she was yelling at him at maximum volume. I couldn't decide whether I should yell, laugh, cry, or keep watching, to be honest.
I heard Jasper's gasp and chuckle over my shoulder as he came to a halt behind me. Soon, he wasn't able to contain his laughter any longer and had to escape to the common room. I closed our bedroom door quickly, hoping not to alert the copulating pair that they'd had two pairs of eyes on them in the act.
Without a word, I turned around and walked back out of the bunk, finally letting my laughter ring out into the silent night. I heard the door slam behind me and took notice that Jasper had followed me outside.
"I'm going to have to burn my sheets." I couldn't stop laughing, despite the grossness of the situation. "Why the fuck are they on my bed?"
Jasper snickered and responded in kind. "Well, as I was in the common room, I couldn't help but notice that Emmett was making some loud noises behind his closed door as well."
"Motherfucker," I swore under my breath. Was Jake really so desperate for a fuck that he couldn't find somewhere else to do it but my clean bed? I mean, what was wrong with our bathroom? And the laundry room and the gym were both just a short walk away. I was disgusted, yes, but I was also fucking amused. Only Jake.
Jasper was about to respond again when we heard a huge disturbance coming from a few bunks down. A door slammed, and a loud booming voice started shouting, "Fuck! Why the fuck am I such a dick?"
I didn't recognize the tone, but I'd know that voice anywhere. It followed me around fourteen hours a day. Seth.
"What the hell?" Jasper asked, craning his neck to see where Seth was running to. I couldn't see a goddamned thing in the dark, so I took a few steps closer, hoping to catch the tail end of the drama.
"Dude, what the hell just happened?" Jasper asked again. I shrugged, having no idea, but I was excited to get camp gossip before it went through the filters of everyone else.
Seth had always been so even keeled. I'd never heard him raise his voice like that. Ever. I was incredibly curious as to what the fuck had gotten him so riled up. The only thing I could think of that could possibly elicit such a major reaction…
As soon as her name entered my head, I heard a woman crying behind the closed door of the bunk that Seth had just fled.
No. No fucking way…
Without conscious or rational thought, my feet dragged me toward Seth's bunk. Jasper trailed after me, asking me what the hell I was doing, but if what I thought had actually pissed off Seth that bad was right, I couldn't not check and see if they were her tears.
The ever-acquiescing Jasper shouted something about him checking on Seth, but I continued forward. The sobbing hadn't stopped, or even lessened, for that matter. On the contrary, it progressively got louder with each second I stood outside the door, hand poised on the handle. Finally, I couldn't take my self-imposed suspense anymore.
What I saw made my insides boil.
Bella was curled up, clutching a pillow to her chest, her hands gripping at her knees as her body convulsed with the force of her sobs. It was then that I took note of what she was wearing, or rather, what she wasn't wearing.
My mind started jumping around, sorting through the pieces of evidence I had—Bella was only wearing her underwear, Bella was hysterically crying, Seth had left dramatically, Seth had verbally berated himself for being an ass (a fact I would not dispute), and I was fucking furious.
I sorted through these facts, always coming back to one conclusion: he'd taken advantage of her…or tried to, at least.
I had no idea what to do. My entire body was so tense that I was sure it was vibrating, and I could feel my rage spiraling out of control. I wanted to sprint after Jasper and rearrange Seth's face, but that would have to wait until after I had dealt with the obviously traumatized girl in front of me. I yearned to take her into my arms, but I wasn't sure that was the best approach. Instead, I cleared my throat quietly, trying to gain her attention.
"Bella?"
At the sound of my voice, her head lifted up, finally allowing me to peer into her eyes. The tears continued to stream down her face as she muttered, mostly to herself, "No, no, no," while shaking her head from side to side.
Seeing that she was still a bit hysterical, I moved to comfort her, maybe wrap an arm around her shoulder or even a hand on her knee. Just…something. I couldn't stand this. But as soon as I placed my hand on the soft skin of her arm, her entire body went rigid.
"Bella?" I asked again, a little louder this time. When she still gave no indication that she'd even heard me, I squeezed her arm a little.
That was enough to set her off again, and soon she was inching away from me, pressing herself up against the wall while screams ripped themselves from her lungs. "Don't touch me! Don't you fucking touch me!"
I immediately dropped my hand and took a step backwards, as if I'd been burned. I had no idea how to handle this kind of situation. I needed Jasper, or someone, or something.
"Okay, okay, I won't touch you." I tried to speak calmly, as if I were trying to tame a spooked horse, but it wasn't working. Bella's cries only got louder and angrier. I understood that it was probably normal to lash out on people, but I hadn't been prepared for something like this tonight.
"You don't ever get to fucking touch me again!" Her eyes closed again as she continued to shake her head, crying, "It's wrong…it's so wrong."
"Bella, please calm down," I begged, but she was having none of it. Her tears came in mass torrents, covering her red cheeks as she continued to yell at me nonsensically.
During her hysterical outburst, she'd let the pillow drop to the floor, revealing her naked breasts, but I couldn't focus on them right now. No, I needed to focus on helping her, re-clothing her. My eyes scanned the floor; her shorts and t-shirt lay in a heap in the middle of the room.
I knew she was going to fight me, and I couldn't help her alone anymore. I needed to find someone. And that someone had to prevent me from running off and killing Seth, ripping his body apart, limb from limb.
Picking her shirt up first, I turned it right side out and put it over her head. Under my fingers, her body went limp, and I managed to get the shirt on quickly.
Her eyes flashed towards me, and I was left nearly incapacitated by the sadness I saw in them.
"It'll be okay, Bella," I whispered, holding out her shorts for her to step into.
"No, Edward, it won't," she whispered before breaking into gut-wrenching sobs again.
Murder. Seth was going to be the victim of murder at my hand. It was going to happen later, I swore to myself. But first, I needed to tend to Bella. Ignoring the way her sobs increased, I picked her up and cradled her against my chest. Her fists slammed against my chest, wailing for me to let her down and let her go, but I maintained my hold on her and began walking toward my bunk.
I didn't particularly give a shit about what was going on in either one of the rooms. Bella needed us, and they were going to stop mid-thrust to come to her aid if that was what was necessary for her to calm down.
Just before reaching the bunk, Jasper crossed our path again. His eyes widened considerably at the sight of Bella in my arms, and he looked as if he were grasping for words, unable to figure out the right ones to say. I felt the exact same way, so I just said, "I know," with a solemn nod. "Did you deal with Seth?" I all but growled. His name tasted like acid on my tongue.
"Yeah, Edward, but you should kn—"
"Ohhhhh, yes!" Emily's high-pitched wailing interrupted us. "Fuck me like a dog, please!"
There was a loud, harsh growl, and then Jake's voice continued, "Yeah…ung…you like it on your knees, don't you, bitch?"
I couldn't help but crack a smile at the ridiculously cheesetastic porno lines coming from behind my bedroom door.
"Fuck me harder, you big, big boy!" A series of panting and slapping noises (I didn't even want to know) were followed by a lengthy moan, and I hoped to God that the hideous performance was over. I'd be sleeping on the couch in the common room tonight, no matter what, though.
A chuckle escaped through my lips, breaking the silence.
Wait, silence?
I looked down at the girl in my arms, whose eyes were now wide with surprise. Her crying had stopped completely, and she shifted in my arms just enough to make me realize that she wanted to get down.
Bella's body wriggled against mine until her feet were firmly planted on the floor. Her large brown eyes were filled with questions as they flicked from my face to my now-silent room and then back again.
"But…but I…but how…?" Her voice was thick with the remnants of her tears, which had dried her throat and clogged her nose. Suddenly, she came hurdling at me, tucking her head into my chest and wrapping her arms around my waist as her tears returned. "Edward, I'm s-sorry…s-so s-sorry!"
I was appalled by her words. How could she apologize to me at a time like this? "Bella, you have no reason to be sorry. What happened was not your fault," I said sternly.
Bella pulled away suddenly, her eyes searching my face for something. After only a few seconds, she seemed to have found it. She took a deep breath and swayed on her feet before muttering, "I really need to sit down…"
"Of course." I stepped close to her and led her to the couch. She sat as far away from me as possible, but I couldn't stand the distance between us anymore and scooted close to place her hands in mine. "Bella, can you tell me what happened?"
She looked down at our joined hands and bit her lip, tugging at it with her front teeth. "I'm so sorry," she whispered solemnly.
I reached out and tilted her chin in my direction, needing to reassure her. She sounded so broken, and for the first time in my life, I felt a responsibility towards someone. I needed to make her better. Her big brown eyes were filled with tears as they fixed themselves on me. "You need to stop apologizing. Please," I begged. "Please tell me what happened."
She blinked, and tears spilled over and rolled down her cheeks. "You're going to hate me," she whispered, cringing.
"There is no way that's possible. The only person I could possibly hate in this entire fucking scenario is the one who made you cry. I swear to God, if I see Seth—"
"No!" she exclaimed, her body stiffening again. "Please don't be mad at Seth. It's my fault, not his."
My mind was reeling. I couldn't keep up at all. I'd heard of people who were abused and then blamed themselves, but to actually see it come to fruition with someone who I cared so deeply about was thoroughly disturbing.
"Bella, you may think that, but it's not true. Seth…" I shook my head, unable to finish my thought.
"Seth was only doing what I asked him to."
"What?" My heart stuttered. She couldn't possibly mean what I thought she meant.
"I…I wanted to see you, and I came here because I really wanted to share something with you, and then I heard…" She motioned in the direction of my still occupied bedroom. "…Fuck, Edward, I'm so sorry. I really thought that…that…"
And then it clicked. I suddenly felt as thought I'd been stabbed in the chest and the back simultaneously. "You thought that I was in there." I didn't ask it as a question; the return of Bella's tears was all the confirmation I needed. "Fuck."
I had no other words. My mind had gone from thinking that Seth had potentially tried to rape Bella to now realizing that Bella had gone to him—no, fled to him—because she'd thought that…well, I didn't really know what she'd thought.
I pulled at my hair, groaning at the whole situation. And the worst part was that I couldn't even really be mad at anyone but myself. And I wasn't really mad. No, I was more sad. It kind of sucked. After all, I had been the one who hadn't been secure enough to tell her how I felt—how I wanted her to be mine and me hers. It hurt like a motherfucker, though, realizing that she didn't think I would be faithful. Or could be faithful.
Bella's tears continued to pour out, and I realized that I hadn't really done much to assuage her fears. She most likely took my silence as a rejection.
"Bella, I'm not mad." I wrapped one arm around her shoulders and pulled her against my side so that I could wipe the tears from her cheeks more easily.
She looked at me with her beautiful and confused eyes, and I just wanted to kiss it all away, but I knew that was what had got us into this whole mess to begin with. The kissing would have to be postponed until later.
"You really thought that I was with Emily?" Her lip quivered as she nodded. "Then I can't really be mad at you. You thought I was with someone else…I'm sure if the situation had been reversed, I'd have done far worse." I paused to reign in my thoughts. I felt like a total girl, but the ache in my stomach was telling me that I absolutely had to ask. "But…how could you think that I would be with someone else after what happened with us the other night?"
"Honestly?" she asked quietly, tucking her head into my chest. My hand that had been wrapped around her shoulders slid down to make small comforting circles on her lower back, helping her even out her breathing.
"Please."
She sighed, and I could feel the shaky vibrations, the remnants of her outburst. "Because it doesn't make sense."
"What doesn't make sense?"
"You…wanting to be with me. It was like I'd been living in a dream for two days and then gotten my wakeup call."
Wow. Did she really think that? Because I had been on cloud nine for the past two days under her influence alone.
I gripped her shoulders with my hands and pushed her back to make sure she could see my face as I spoke firmly. "Bella, I can't let you think that. You are so much better than me, it's fucking ridiculous. Do you need me to tell you all the ways in which you've already surpassed me? Because I will." She opened her mouth to obviously protest, so I barreled on, riding the coattails of whatever wave of confidence I was experiencing. "You're a beautiful, hilariously inappropriate, talented, ambitious, caring person. The only thing here that doesn't make sense is why you can't see how amazing you are."
Her cheeks flushed at my words, and I was happy to note that this time, the redness wasn't from her tears.
"Thank you," she said, tucking her chin into her chest bashfully. "So…"
"So…" I cleared my throat and pushed her hair behind her ears, needing to occupy my hands with some way to dispel my nervous energy. "Next time you hear those kinds of noises coming from my room, I'm hoping it'll be because you're in there with me." Bella's jaw dropped a little bit, so I hurried to add, "But that won't be for a while…cause…um…"
"Because I'm clearly not ready." She nodded, mostly to herself, but I understood the sentiment. It was true. No matter how much Bella had tried to convince herself that she was ready, there was still the fact that this epic communication breakdown had led her to act rashly.
"And we'll talk about it?" I asked, unsure of what the proper protocol for a situation like this was.
"We'll definitely talk about it. I'm sorry I just assumed—"
"Bella, if you don't stop apologizing, I'm going to actually get mad," I threatened. "And, uh, Bella?" Her attention was fixed on me, and I knew that I had to just do it and make the final step. Had I done this two days ago, I had a feeling that this shit would have never happened at all. "Just for clarification purposes, do you want to be my girlfriend, like, officially?"
She sat there staring at me for what felt like hours, and I began to wonder if I had made the wrong presumption. I was about to backtrack and take it all back and let her dictate everything from then on when she pounced on me. Her arms were thrown around my neck so tightly that she was dangerously close to cutting off my air supply, but I could have cared less.
"I'm hoping that's a yes?"
"Of course it's a fucking yes, you ass." She moved her head and pressed her lips against mine, smiling so hard that it was less of a kiss and more just breathing into my mouth. Naturally, I was okay with it if it meant that Bella would stay perched in my lap like she was.
"Nice," I mumbled back. "I ask you to be my girlfriend and you call me an ass. You're the one who hooked up with someone else tonight."
Bella pulled back quickly. "I know, and I'm so sorry."
"And I still don't want to hear your apologies. I'm serious. Now, please come back here so I can kiss my girlfriend again."
"So demanding," she said sternly, but the smile on her face gave her away. Her lips met mine, softly at first, and I groaned as she slid her hands from my neck to scratch over my scalp. I could feel my cock hardening in my shorts, but I knew that we needed to take things at a snail's pace…slower than that, even.
What's slower than a snail?
She pulled away and smiled shyly.
"So obedient."
She slapped my chest lightly before leaning her head against my chest. I had to shift my position slightly, moving so that my head could be propped against the armrest and my body could extend the length of the couch with Bella on top of me. I hadn't heard a peep from either my room or Emmett's, so I assumed the couples were done with their fucking and getting their sleep on.
Sighing, Bella looked up at me and began talking again. "Edward, I know you don't want me to apologize—" I started to reply that, no, I didn't want her to apologize, but she barreled on. "—but I really have to."
She propped herself up on her elbows and looked me in the eyes. "Edward, I'm sorry. I know you said that if you had thought what I thought, then you would've done the same thing, but…that's the thing, isn't it?" She laughed, but she didn't sound particularly amused. "You wouldn't have ever thought what I thought."
I couldn't protest that fact. It was true. I'd thought after the other night, we both expressed how we felt about one another. I couldn't really imagine being in her position, hearing what she heard, but I couldn't imagine not questioning it, either.
I strained my neck forward and pressed a kiss to her forehead. "You're right. Thank you."
She nodded in acceptance, and relief flooded her features, allowing her to relax back into my chest. We lay there in silence, just taking solace in one another's presence, finally. My fingers tugged through her tangled hair, smoothing it out along the length of her back. I loved feeling our breaths even out together; our heartbeats slowed to the same rhythm. It was the kind of peace that we both desperately needed after our heinous day. Our peace was interrupted far too soon, though.
"Ugh, get a fucking room," was called out to us amongst low chuckling, and I sprung up so fast that I nearly knocked Bella off the couch and onto the floor.
"You!" I growled, pointing an accusatory finger at my whore of a best friend. "You motherfucking cocksucking idiot!"
Jake shrugged and held up my laundry basket, which had my sheets and blankets on top. "I was going to wash them…"
"Are you serious right now? Don't wash them…burn them!" I raged. "And flip the mattress over, too. Gah! I'm going to have to make a Walmart run tomorrow, and you're paying."
Although he at least had the decency to look somewhat ashamed, Jake simply wrapped an arm around Emily's shoulders and whispered theatrically, "Good God, he's such a drama queen. How did you ever put up with him?"
Emily caught my eye and I shook my head, hopefully somewhat discreetly, signaling that now wasn't particularly the best moment to revisit our previous relations. Her eyes flashed to Bella, who was still perched on my lap, only sideways now, so that she could properly admonish Jake.
She crinkled her nose at him, as if he smelled foul, which he probably did. "Disgusting."
His jaw dropped, and it seemed as if he was going to refute her for a second, but then he just nodded and sighed. "I'm aware."
Satisfied, Bella leaned back and snuggled into my chest, allowing me the privilege of just holding her in my arms. "Good. Just as long as you know." A large yawn contorted her face as she finished her sentence, and I knew she must be exhausted. Today had been a long enough day without the added emotional trauma we'd both just been subjected to.
"Time for bed, little one," I said as I kissed the top of her head, earning me an angry scowl.
"No jokes about me being little, please?"
I rolled my eyes and pulled us both off the couch. "Let me walk you back to campus. Emily, do you want to come?" Emily looked from Jake to me to Bella and nodded in acceptance.
"I can walk you," Jake butted in.
"Actually, you can't. You have to do my laundry, fucker."
With that, I left the jackass to clean up his mess. Nasty pervert.
The walk back to campus was fairly quiet. I loved the feel of Bella's hand laced with mine, and I loved it even more that I got to kiss her goodnight.
As Emily walked back to her bunk, I grabbed Bella's hand again before she could follow. "Goodnight, girlfriend."
I smirked and couldn't help but steal another kiss from her pouty mouth. At this point, I was really only making myself harder, but I figured I could hop into the shower and have some alone time before bed.
She hummed against my lips but gave me a sad smile as she pulled away.
"Night, Edward."
I watched as she walked across the large campus towards her bunk, trying in vain not to focus on the sway of her hips, but that was like asking Superman to hang out in a room filled with kryptonite; it wasn't going to happen. So, instead, I gave in and followed her sweet ass with my gaze until her bunk door closed, hiding it from my sight.
As I walked down the hill back toward my bunk, I noticed that there was a light on in the shack. My stomach clenched, and I knew exactly what I had to do. It would be weird and probably difficult as fuck, but I needed to talk to Seth.
Just before I opened the door to the shack, I heard Winona Ryder's voice come through.
"I was really going to be somebody by the time I was twenty-three."
Oh no. Is he watching…
"Honey, all you have to be by the time you're twenty-three is yourself," Ethan Hawke's voice replied. My stomach twisted, knowing exactly how fucked up he must be feeling to be watching Reality Bites.
" I don't know who that is anymore." I stood outside, knowing that I should go in, but I couldn't bring myself to interrupt the most pivotal scene in the movie.
"I do," Ethan's sincere voice rang out. "And we all love her. I love her. She breaks my heart again and again, but I love her."
I heard a distinct whine and growl, followed by a thump. Nervously, I cracked the door open, peering into the shack. Seth's head was resting on his folded arms, and he was staring directly at the floor.
The door shutting behind me clicked loud enough for Seth to hear it over the dialogue of the most depressing film in unrequited love history, and he shot up like a rod, tensing as he saw me.
His eyes were bloodshot, and his hair was a mess. I'd never seen him look so out of sorts before. Then again, I'd never heard him lose his shit before tonight, either.
"Hey," I began nervously.
All of a sudden, Seth got this panicked look in his eyes. "Shit, Edward, if you're pissed at me, could we do this tomorrow? I…I just can't do it right now."
I pulled up a chair, sat down facing him, and spoke as clearly as I could. "I actually came to thank you."
"Thank me?" he asked, completely disbelieving. "What the hell for? If this is some reverse psychology bullshit—"
"No, Seth. I mean it. Thank you." I gulped, trying to calm my nerves. I hoped I wasn't exacerbating the problem or probing at his wound. That was not the intention. "What you did earlier tonight…"
Seth visibly cringed and purposefully averted his eyes, but I soldiered on.
"It was really, well, considerate. I don't know if you know what happened—"
"I don't," he interjected, "but I don't really need to know. That wasn't important."
"And that's why I'm here," I stated, noting his confusion. "Yeah, I don't mean to get all emotional on you, but what you did showed exactly how much you care about her." I didn't use Bella's name, for fear of making him cringe again. When he didn't, I continued my explanation. "And so I have to thank you for stopping what could have been a really..." I paused, letting him digest my words. I could see him processing them, accepting them for what they were.
"Huge fucking mistake?" he filled in.
I nodded and continued cautiously, knowing that the next words out of my mouth were probably the most sensitive. "I know how hard it is to deny yourself something you really want. No matter how hard I tried, actually, I couldn't actually stop. But you did. Your behavior tonight, Seth, it was…commendable. You're mature way beyond your years, and I wish that I could tell you it'll all be okay or whatever, but I can't. But I do know that what goes around comes around and all that other mumbo jumbo bullshit has its place."
He stared at me again, keeping his eyes trained on my face. He smiled sadly and shook his head. "Winona Ryder will always love Ethan Hawke. It doesn't matter how nice Ben Stiller is or how many things they share in common or even how much fun they have together. Even when Ethan's not number one, he's still number one. It just took some time for me to remember that."
I couldn't help but smile at his movie analogy. We really were quite the pair of film nerds, and I genuinely felt bad for the guy that I couldn't do anything to make it better because I'd be damned before I let Bella run into his arms again.
After a less-than-enthusiastic goodbye, I left Seth to his wallowing. It felt justified.
Back in the bunk, Jasper was sitting on the common room couch, waiting for my arrival. He'd never admit it, but he was a gossipy little fucker—just like his little sprite of a girlfriend.
Upon seeing me, he shot off the couch and started rambling, "Edward, I chased after Seth, and—"
I held up my hand and slumped down to rest on the couch. "Yeah, I know what happened."
He raised an eyebrow in my direction, looking skeptical. "You do?"
"Once Bella calmed down enough to realize I hadn't been the one screwing Emily, we talked. Like, finally really talked."
"And?" Jasper said, leaning closer.
"And we're great. No, we're better than great."
He sighed and slouched back into the couch next to me. "I'm so happy to hear that." Jasper sounded genuinely relieved. "And how great was Bella's news?"
I cocked my head at Jasper, having no fucking clue what he was talking about.
"The contact she made?" At my non-response, he continued. "In LA? With the film executive?"
"What?" I shouted, probably waking up half the guys in the surrounding bunks.
"I thought you said you and Bella talked about everything!" he whined, clearly exasperated by my lack of knowledge on the topic.
"I…we talked about us. She failed to mention that news," I said grimly. After talking about communicating more, how could Bella forget to mention that extremely important piece of information? I could already picture her walking around set, knowing exactly what she wanted. The image was enough to revitalize my hard-on, and I figured that a shower wank was definitely in order. God knew I deserved it after the day I'd been subjected to.
Longest. Day. Ever.
The kind soul that he was, Jasper tossed me one of his blankets to use on the couch while I started the shower, turning it as hot as it would go.
My nerves were frayed, and I stood underneath the pelting water for a while, just to calm me down. As soon as I was reasonably calm, I took a deep breath and imagined Bella in the shower with me. I knew it wouldn't happen for a while, but just the prospect was enough to cause my dick to rise. She was my girlfriend. I'd used the word and she'd confirmed it. There was no backing out now—not that I had any desire to do so.
I recalled her reaction to me calling her little and wondered what kind of nickname I could conjure up for her. Obviously, LB was out of the question, but what about SB for sexy Bella? Or VB for vixen Bella? Or GB for grown-up Bella? Actually, I supposed that would be GUB, which was a little weird. Eh, I had time to work on it. For now, I had some frustration to dispel.
As the steam swirled around me, I pumped my cock with my hand slowly, releasing the tension from my day. I had so much pent-up sexual energy, though, and I knew I was going to be using my hand for a while…but that didn't mean I couldn't imagine my hand was Bella's hot mouth. I ran my hand over the sensitive head, imagining her tongue flicking out and sucking it. As I continued my thrusting, I wondered if Bella would be open to my two favorite numbers: six and nine. I couldn't imagine many things better than feeling Bella's mouth on me while I sucked her clit into my mouth, between my teeth, hearing and feeling her moan around me…
Shit.
That was too fucking quick. I was going to have to get better control of myself in the very near future.
I got comfortable (well, as comfortable as I could) on the couch as soon as I'd finished my shower. Tomorrow, I would ream Jake out for not only causing unnecessary drama but for fornicating in my living quarters without my permission. I mean, who the fuck did that anyway?
With thoughts of beating down my best friend and getting rewarded by my incredibly sexy girlfriend (SGB?), I finally fell asleep, hoping that the remainder of our days wouldn't feel this long or tedious ever again.
Chapter End Notes: Seeeee? I told you the heartfail wouldn't be prolonged. Sigh.
I love you guys so much. Thank you for standing by me, especially this past week. A lot of you know what was going on in my real life, and I could not be more blessed to have your support.
xoxo.