AN: Thank you to everyone still on this ride with me. I promised I'd keep going, so here I am. For those of you who follow me on twitter (I'm lexiecullen17 over there, too), you know that I had a run in with my RL Campward recently, and I'm not going to lie, it definitely threw me off my writing game. But, now I know more than ever that I need to finish this story…for myself.
Massive thanks to everyone who has reviewed and PMed and stuck with me. The journey is about to get a little bumpy.
Hugs and kisses to my betas lisa89 and lreganb for making my chapters prettier.
And now…onward!
~Edward~
"Wake up, you sleepyhead!" I heard my annoying big sister call out before she flopped down on top of me. I had been quite comfortable and in the middle of a pretty fucktastic dream about Bella, so needless to say, I was a bit cranky.
"What the fuck, T? Why are you still here?" My arms and legs thrashed underneath her tiny form that was somehow managing to keep me pinned to my mattress.
She blew in my ear, a short, quick gust, before rolling off and letting me free. Stupid big sisters. I was far too old for this shit.
"I'm here because I'm about to head back home, and you're going to take me out to breakfast."
I groaned and finally opened my eyes, knowing the only way she was going to stop her incessant bouncing was if I got up and took her out.
"Come on, Teddy," she said with a glare. "I want a head start on my day and to be out of here by eight."
"Eight?" I croaked. As I tilted my head to the side, sure enough, there was Jasper sprawled out, still sleeping, and completely unaware of my crazy sister's need to wake me with the birds.
A low groan came from the other side of the room. "If y'all don't hightail it out of here right now, I'm going to go ninja on your asses."
Oops. Apparently Jasper was not still sleeping.
With a quick apology, I rolled out of bed and slipped my feet into some sneakers before heading out the door, still half asleep.
Tanya ruffled my hair, commenting on my breakfast attire, and led us to her jeep. Wind whipped through my hair as we drove down the narrow road away from the camp, waking me slightly.
I wasn't fully awake until I'd had a huge cup of coffee, though. And Tanya was kind enough to tell the waitress to keep refilling the cup. It wasn't too hard, seeing as the small diner's attendees consisted of a few townies and us.
"Oh-kay, Teddie," she began with an evil glint in her eye, "Let's talk Bella."
I groaned and took another large gulp of the watery coffee in front of me. I knew this conversation was coming, but I thought since I'd been able to put it off all yesterday, she might have forgotten about it. Clearly, I was wrong.
"What do you want to talk about?" I responded wearily.
Luckily, I was saved by the server, who interrupted our conversation, placing our food down on the table. My cheddar, tomato, and mushroom omelet was devoured quickly, accompanied by hash browns drenched in syrup.
"We need to talk about sex, Teddie."
Mid-swallow, I choked slightly, the potato suddenly feeling thick and rough going down my throat.
"I'm well aware of the how-to's of that, T," I choked out.
She rolled her eyes and sliced her fork through a thick piece of sausage before bringing it up to her lips and shoving it in her mouth. The imagery was enough to make me shudder.
"Oh, I don't doubt that for a second, little brother. But what we need to talk about is you and Bella and sex. It's going to happen today, so I just want you to be prepared."
"I…what?" I stuttered. "Tanya, seriously, we've only been together for a week…I think…maybe two. I don't know. Keeping track of time at camp is nearly impossible."
"Exactly!" she exclaimed, startling the elderly couple at the table behind us. I shrugged apologetically, but Tanya continued to ramble. "A week at camp is like a lifetime. Honestly, Teddie, I'm shocked. You, Emmett, and Jake became best friends within an hour of meeting each other. How long does that usually take in real life? Minimum, a month? So, if an hour of camp time equates to a month of real life time, you and Bella have already been dating for years. Believe me, sex is happening…and soon."
I couldn't find any flaws in her logic. And deep down, I knew she was right. We'd already exchanged, 'I love you's." Bella's was etched into her hip for eternity, which, by the way, was one of the fucking hottest things I'd ever seen. The fact that she not only had remembered that was my favorite line but that I also thought it was the most romantic? Settling between her thighs was only a fraction of what I'd actually wanted to do. I'd say we were ready.
"Teddie!" Tanya snapped her fingers in front of my face, bringing my attention back to her. "Good lord, child, where did you just go?" I opened my mouth to speak, but she held up a hand to stop me. "Never mind, I don't actually want to know. What I want to know is if you are going to be safe."
"Jesus, Tanya, are you fucking serious?" I could feel my pulse pounding behind my ears, my frustration rising with each second my sister stared blankly at me. Finally, she cracked and started giggling.
"Edward," she sighed. "I don't know what I'm going to do with you. Look at you, having feelings and falling in love. But you always find one thing to deny. It's because you're an over-thinker. But, then again, so is Bella. Your fatal flaws. It'll kill you both, I swear. I don't know what you'd do if you didn't have me. I did some recon and learned that your girlfriend is on the pill, so…if you're clean…"
My mouth hung agape, and my cock perked up at the images of sliding into Bella. "How the hell do you find out this shit?" I whispered, looking around conspiratorially.
"Rose tells Emmett everything, and Emmett tells Jake everything. And Jake loves his pillow talk."
I barked out a laugh at that thought. "Your pillow talk with my douche of a best friend consists of what contraception options there are for me and my girlfriend?"
She shrugged and flagged down our waitress for the bill. "It came up." She paused, biting her lip and scratching the back of her head, like I always did when I was thinking about something uncomfortable. "Jake's just worried about Bella," she whispered. "He talks big game, but you know he's a marshmallow underneath that ridiculous male bravado. Bella's his little sister, practically. And you two gave him quite the scare the other night."
"The other night?"
"In the lake?" Oh, right. That. "He was flipping out, saying, 'don't those two know that condoms aren't effective under water?' and some other bullshit. Then, he tells me, 'I know Rose told Emmett she's on the pill, but that's not a hundred percent effective either!' You know, it's kind of useful having a slutty friend, really. That boy knows far too much about birth control and STD prevention. Although, I guess in this case, it was kind of handy, no?"
Creepy as the conversation might have been, I couldn't get my newly acquired information to stop running through my head. I was on a sudden high, which may have been due to the mass quantities of caffeine running through my bloodstream, but I'd also bet it was a little bit in part because my girlfriend was on the pill. And now, all I could think about was sex. This was going to be a problem.
Still in a daze, I watched on as Tanya left money on the table and headed out to her car. I glanced at the clock on the center console, seeing it was only 7:37. Something in my gut told me it was going to be a long ass day.
x-x-x
"Counselors, please stay in the dining hall for a quick staff meeting following breakfast," the director announced loudly from the corner table.
Well, I knew what that meant. I waited patiently as the campers filed out of the room, chatting excitedly. They knew what that announcement meant as well. Oh well, at least the directors were consistent.
The director cleared his throat and began his spiel about what was to take place for the rest of the day.
Special Day.
"As most of you know, today is Special Day," he began. "This means that all your activities are canceled for the rest of the day. For those of you who are new to Long Lake and have no idea what I'm talking about, Special Day is a day reserved for the kids to let loose and have a good time. We turn the camp into a fair of sorts, led by all of you. We'll be setting up booths all along the hill and dividing you all into teams. The team with the most tickets at the end wins an ice cream social. This year's theme is movies, and I've posted a list of the team captains and their members in the counselor lounge for you all. It's up to the team captains to pick their movie and come up with costumes before the first period. Now, get to it. And have a very special day."
I glanced at the table next to me, but Jake had already bounded up from the table, most likely on his way to the counselor lounge. He had an undying love for Special Day. As did everyone, really. It was a day of too much food, sun, costumes, and cheating. So much cheating. The counselors were definitely the worst offenders of stuffing their teams' bags with extra tickets.
As a squealing Alice pulled Bella out of her seat and towards the counselor lounge, I decided to follow, knowing I'd have very little time to put together whatever costume I needed. Upon entering, Jake turned around, fuming and pointing a large hulking finger towards me.
"You!" he cried.
I stumbled backwards, bracing myself for impact, but it never came.
"I…I…" Jake fumbled his words, searching desperately but getting progressively more frustrated.
"What?" I asked, getting annoyed. "T-t-today, Junior."
"You!"
Apparently that was the only word Jake was currently capable of getting out.
"Oh," Emmett laughed, clutching his stomach. "This is priceless."
"What?" I asked, anger starting to infiltrate my tone.
"You're the team captain," Emmett chortled. "Shotty being Han Solo!" he said, raising his hand into the air.
"Wh-huh?"
My head was reeling. They made me captain? Who else was on my team? Jake had always been chosen as the captain.
Ohhhh, now this makes sense as to why he's all stuttery with the words.
"Fuck yes!" I shouted, my mind finally catching up with the matter at hand. "Okay, so who else is on the team? Because I'm definitely being Anakin."
My eyes scrolled down the list.
Captain: Edward Cullen
Jake Black
Rosalie Hale
Emmett McCarty
Bella Swan
Jasper Whitlock
Was this some kind of joke? I looked around, wondering if I was being Punk'd or something, but all I saw were the bright and shining faces of my best friends.
"What team is Alice on?" I asked, still unsure of the truth of the situation.
Jasper rolled his eyes. "She's on the team with all the theater girls. She's being little orphan Annie."
"So, does that mean I get to be Padme?" Bella smiled mischievously.
I nodded and grinned, pulling her into my arms so that I could kiss the top of her head. One of my biggest fantasies was about to happen for real, and my light saber was extended, glowing, and ready for battle.
x-x-x
"I don't think I can do this, Edward," Bella whined from behind my closed bathroom door.
I chuckled and pulled my black robe closed, tying it off at the waist. "That was all the costume closet had, MB. If it doesn't work, you could always use that huge brown coat they had and be Queen Amidala instead…" I trailed off, knowing that she'd never take up that option considering the weather was about to reach ninety degrees in the sunshine.
"Fuck you very much, Edward. I can hear you laughing from here."
I leaned my head against the door and placed my hand around the doorknob. Everyone else was waiting on her to finish getting ready. Rosalie and Emmett looked like replicas of Leia and Han Solo, while Jasper had straightened his normally wavy hair into the perfect 1970's Mark Hamill coif to be Luke Skywalker. Jake had taken the most cajoling, finally agreeing to be Obi Wan, even though all he wanted was to be Yoda. Yes, my six-foot-seven, massive best friend wanted to be a midget muppet. Such a freak. And of course, typical me had four toy light sabers lying around my room. True Story.
"Come on, LB," he shouted, straightening his white robe. He looked more like Mr. Miagi with a light saber than Obi Wan, but I wasn't going to piss him off anymore than he already was. "Time's a-wasting. We have to be at the head of campus in ten minutes!"
Finally, the door cracked open, and I saw what all the fuss was about. My jaw loosened, unable to stay closed as she emerged from the small room. Bella had found a white top that showed off her entire stomach and white dance pants to wear as Padme. And, fuck. She looked…unf. My girlfriend was ridiculously hot. I could see a faint outline of her tattoo if I looked hard enough, which was enough to make my cock perk up and take notice. Her hair was tied up in a complicated mess of loops and twirls and a silver cuff on her arm was all topped off by a large black machine gun.
"Whoa!" Emmett cried, wrapping a large arm around Bella's shoulders. "Someone's looking bad ass today."
She groaned, her brown eyes searching out mine before she crashed her forehead into my chest. "I look stupid," she mumbled into the thick cotton of my robe.
My hands trailed lightly up and down her bare back, making sure not to dip too low in the presence of her very large and very threatening big brother figures standing behind her. "Bella," I whispered, leaning down so that only she could hear me. "You look so far from stupid right now. All I want to do is kick everyone out and pull that costume off slowly…with my teeth."
She giggled and looked up, her chin resting softly against my chest. I stared at her, wanting so badly to kiss her and ravage her, but I knew we had to go. A fierce clap to my shoulder pulled me from my stupor, shaking me away from my fantasies.
"Come on, Anakin," Rosalie said with a roll of her eyes. "You don't whisper as softly as you think you do, and I'm pretty sure you're going to be massacred before you even get the chance to grow up into Darth Vader if we don't get a move on." She smirked and smacked Bella's ass, pushing her crotch into my fully hardened cock. Awesome.
The rest of the morning passed by quickly, the sun growing stronger with each passing hour. For the first time in my career at Long Lake, I could do whatever I wanted during Special Day. Seth had so gallantly offered to film, so I just floated from booth to booth, helping out whenever someone needed an extra hand. Still, even with my minimal involvement, by the time lunch came around, we were all ready to pass out. Bella grabbed me a plate, and we walked through the outdoor cookout line slowly behind the campers. I may or may not have spent most the time checking out Bella's ass in her white pants. But, I mean, come on…it was right there.
After grabbing two hot dogs, corn on the cob, a bunch of chips, and three slices of watermelon, I followed Bella to a spot on the hill under a large tree where our fellow team leaders were communing in the shade.
I loved cookout days.
As Rosalie picked at her grilled chicken and speared a few pieces of lettuce, Bella dug into her own hot dog, her plump lips wrapping around the thick pink meat.
Thick pink meat? Are you serious right now?
I chewed, barely tasting my own food as I watched her with interest.
"Mm," she moaned, her eyes closing briefly in appreciation for the food she was chewing.
Swallow.
Her eyes shot open, locking onto mine, and her cheeks flushed crimson. My filter had completely broken, and I'd definitely spoken my innermost thoughts out loud. Undeterred, Bella followed my command, never breaking our gaze as she let the food slide down her throat.
"Enough with the food porn, you two!" Jake berated us. "There are campers present! And I'm gonna yak if you don't tone it down."
"Oh, please," Bella retorted, "like you don't do inappropriate things in front of campers all the time? And yak away. You did three summers ago, too. Remember…the whoopie pie eating contest?"
Jake groaned and clutched at his stomach, dramatically doubling over. "Don't remind me."
"Rematch?" Emmett laughed, holding up the large cream-filled cookie.
Rosalie and Jasper looked on quizzically, so Bella launched into a retelling of the Special Day of 2006 when Emmett had challenged Jake to a whoopie pie eating contest. Jake had claimed he could win, hands down. Needless to say, Emmett had been the victor, and Jake had spent the rest of the night puking up the sugary treat behind Bunk Seven. To this day, he still couldn't look at one without turning a little green.
"That's disgusting," Rosalie chided, side-eyeing Emmett, who had just promptly stuffed the cookie into his mouth.
"Thorrry." His words came out muffled, crumbs escaping from his lips as he grinned.
Shaking my head, I dug back into my food and picked up a watermelon slice. The sweet fruit felt cool in my mouth; it was the perfect day for watermelon. The juice ran down my fingers as I finished the last few bites, but I couldn't bear to waste any of my favorite fruit. My tongue swiped up the remaining stickiness from my fingers before I placed the rind down on my plate. I was thrown back into memories of yesterday afternoon when I'd tasted Bella for the first time. I chuckled, realizing that I hadn't wasted any of that wetness either. God, I was a sick horny fuck.
I looked up, ready to converse again, but the entire group was silent.
"What?" My hand brushed across my mouth, wondering if I'd gotten the juice all over my face, but I felt nothing there.
"Dude," Emmett croaked out, "You just molested that piece of watermelon. What did it ever do to you?"
"Huh? I did not…"
"You so did," Rosalie cackled. "What were you thinking about just then, hm?"
My face heated, a blush spreading over my ears, Jasper style. I shut my eyes tightly, willing it to subside, but it wasn't going anywhere.
"Oh my God," Bella mumbled, pulling her knees up to her chest and dropping her head into her hands.
"I didn't…" I grappled with my words, trying to figure out a way to tell them that I really just loved watermelon, but every explanation required the words "juice," "wet," "sweet," and "delicious." Somehow, I didn't see them being able to desexualize those words. Especially in the current context.
Unable to convince them otherwise, I shrugged my shoulders and picked up my second slice, moaning like a porn star with my first bite.
"Edward!" Bella whisper-yelled, scootching close enough to me to jab her elbow into my side.
"What?" I grinned, winked, and took another large bite.
"You're incorrigible, and I hate you." Sighing, she laid her cheek to the top of her knees, glancing up at me through her lashes.
"No you don't. You love me." My eyes settled on her mouth, which had upturned into a small smile, and I instinctively leaned forward, but she turned her head away, hiding her face away from me. "Bella," I whined, sounding only slightly like a petulant child. "I just want a little kiss. Please?"
Her head snapped up, and I received a dirty glare. Oops.
"We're in the middle of campus, Edward. I don't really want to get fired with only three weeks left."
She was right. I'd forgotten we were completely surrounded by not only our fellow counselors, but also hoards of campers, as well as the camp directors. Maybe kissing right now wasn't in our best interest. Although, now that I was thinking about it, it had been too long since I had kissed her. I wanted to remedy that immediately, but I couldn't.
My cock took notice of her outfit for the trillionth time that day and sprung to life, making me wish that I could take a flaccid pill or something. I really didn't want to be blue balling it for the next four hours until Special Day was over.
Just then, the overhead system rang with chimes, signaling the second half of Special Day starting.
Groaning, I pushed myself up to standing and grabbed my plate and hers, spotting the closest trashcan to toss them into. As I turned around, I caught Jake stripping off his robe and heading towards the dunking booth, cheering as he went. Emmett and Rosalie had gone off to start up the cotton candy machine again, but Jasper and Bella were waiting under the same tree, discussing something heatedly.
"Hey guys, what's shaking?"
Bella turned around, flustered and blushing.
"Just do it, B-Town," Jasper egged on, finishing up whatever they'd been arguing about. "I'll cover for you."
Confused, I looked to Bella, who was shifting from foot to foot, seriously contemplating something. My eyes then slid to Jasper, who had a cocky grin plastered across his face, and I wasn't sure I liked the look of it.
"Don't you have to man the face painting booth?" I pried, wondering why we were still awkwardly chillaxing under the tree.
"Jasper does," Bella began tentatively, but didn't say anymore. Widening my eyes, I urged her to continue. "He offered to take over the booth for me if we wanted to, um…" She crossed her arms in front of her bare stomach, her eyes averting mine suddenly.
"Get out of here," he jumped in. "You two seem like you may need some time alone, and tonight is bunk bonding so we can't see the girls, and I really don't want to put up with your sexually frustrated whiney ass all night. So, please. For my sake, go."
I stared at Bella, her face getting progressively pinker under my gaze and her lip splitting under the stress of her nervous chewing. Did she seriously think I was going to say no to this?
"You're sure?" I asked, my eyes seeking out Jasper's.
"Be gone!" he said with a wave of his hand.
"Come on," I whispered, leaning down to Bella's ear. "Don't make me beg."
A slow grin spread across her face, and she nodded, letting me take the lead. "So, where are we going?"
With the whole camp distracted by the fair, there were ample places for us to wander off to. But, I decided we should still go for comfort and seclusion. No need to be pointlessly uncomfortable.
I began walking down the hill, off towards my bunk. As soon as we were out of eyesight, I grabbed her hand, interlacing her fingers with mine. The walk to the bunk felt long, considering the weather and the stealthy nature of our escape, but we spent it in comfortable silence, enjoying the feel of one another's skin brushing wish each swing of our arms.
The sun beat down on us, and I finally took notice of how hot I'd been in my costume. Once there, I pushed open the door, glad to be in the cool of the bunk and discarded my black robe quickly, placing it on my bed. It left me shirtless, but I figured Bella wouldn't really care. Plus, it had been like ninety fucking degrees outside, maybe eighty-five in the shade.
Groaning, Bella laid out on the bed, stretching out and looking like a goddess on top of my super non-nerdy Transformers sheets. Equally exhausted, I kicked off my flip-flops and lay down next to her, pulling her securely to my side.
"Edward," she sighed, glancing over her shoulder, her complicated mess of braids brushing against my jaw and tickling it softly.
"Hmm," I mumbled, my eyes closed.
"Please tell me you didn't bring me back to your bunk to nap."
"But I'm so fucking tired," I groaned, burying my nose into her hair.
Suddenly, her hand slid its way under the waistband of my pants and wrapped around my cock.
"Your light saber didn't get the memo," she giggled, humming the first few bars of the Star Wars theme. I was in nerd heaven.
"Fuck, I love you," I said appreciatively, moving over her on the mattress, one knee on either side of her legs. Her responding grin was all I needed to lean down and finally place my lips on top of hers. Immediately, her hands were in my hair, tugging and pulling me closer.
"I love you, too," she mumbled in between our heated kisses.
Clothes were shed quickly as we parted every few seconds to remove another item. First her pants and shoes, then my shorts, then her top.
I leaned back, appreciating her body. Every inch of her was gorgeous, from her thick hair to her dark eyes to her perfect tits. We were getting dangerously close to being completely naked together for the first time. All that needed to happen was the removal of both our underwear. And I wasn't sure if this was what she wanted or if I was the one leading and she was just following suit.
"What?" she whispered, her eyes clouding over with confusion at my hesitance.
"We don't have to—"
"Shut up, Edward," she replied emphatically, wrapping her legs around my waist, causing my cock to grind into her soaked crotch.
"Jesus, MB," I groaned as her hands fisted in my hair again, pulling my lips down to nip just under her ear.
Not needing any further encouragement, I slid my hands down her sides and hook into the waistband of her underwear. Her small hands gripped at the back of my neck as her hips lifted, allowing me to remove the last piece of clothing from her body. My eyes immediately sought out her tattoo, which—as I should have expected—still sat proudly on her hip. When it was completely healed, I was going to spend a lot of time worshipping it.
Despite being inside the cool, darkened bunk, Bella was breathing heavily, as if the air was thick. Maybe it was. I know I could feel my nerves starting to creep up on me. I'd never had performance anxiety before, but I'd also never had a girlfriend before, and I certainly had never had sex with someone I'd loved before. It was making me question everything.
But, as soon as Bella's hands slid down my back to pull my boxers off, I forgot it all. The only thing I could focus on was the feel of her gentle hands, and my cock resting against the smooth skin of her thigh.
My head lowered to kiss her lips again, but as I did so, my cock moved, too, trying to make its way inside her without either of our permission.
She gasped softly, but her legs only widened further, her invitation clear.
If this was really going to happen, which at this point was pretty inevitable, I needed a condom ASAP.
"Bella, are you sure?" I had to get some sort of reaffirmation. Silent cues weren't going to cut it today.
"Yes," she whispered.
Kissing her soundly one more time, I leaned down and reached under my bed where – yes, I'll admit it – I kept a strip of condoms. As I tore a packet off, her lips placed feathery kisses at my jaw and under my ear and her delicate fingers ran through my hair, scratching the scalp lightly with each pass. There was something so innocently perfect about it; it made my breath catch for a second.
She was so trusting and patient and incredible.
Not moving my position from over her, I tore the package open and shifted slightly to put the condom on. Once it was in place, I settled back between her legs and placed my tip at her entrance. I could feel her warmth radiating through the thin condom, and I couldn't help but groan and kiss her lips softly.
With a small nudge of her knees, Bella pushed me closer, causing my cock to part her lips. As slowly as I could, I moved within her. There was no hymen to break, but she was still tight as fuck. Her walls squeezed my cock in a vice grip, warmth and wetness strangling it as they pulsed wildly. I'd never experienced anything quite so intense, and my head dropped down to her shoulder, my breath coming in harsh pants as I tried to keep my shit together.
"Bella," I groaned out, and I could feel her fingers tighten in my hair. Blood pounded in my ears; everything felt so raw, emotions coursing through me. I moved my hips a little, readjusting and going even deeper.
And it was then that I felt it—the wince.
I propped myself further up, trying to look at Bella, but her eyes were clenched shut, her fingers still tightly wound in my hair. It wasn't the face of a girl in the throes of pleasure, that was for sure.
"Bella?" I spoke softly, moving one of my hands to stroke her cheek gently.
Her eyes fluttered open, and I could see fear in them. No, no, no. Abort, abort! My mind was screaming at me.
"What's wrong?"
She bit her lip and shook her head.
"N-nothing," she whispered. "Y-you can g-go more."
"No, Bella, I can't…you…You're in pain."
A long shuddering breath escaped her lips, but as she twitched, she clenched around me, inadvertently reigniting my erection, still buried inside her.
"It's not that bad." She paused and took a deep breath before pulling my neck towards hers and kissing me gently. "Please? Just slowly?"
Her eyes seemed so earnest; I couldn't refuse her. And let's be honest, my cock was pretty much having a spiritual moment, meeting its other half and all that nonsense. So, I had no choice but to listen. I didn't want to offend her by stopping, and my dick couldn't bear the thought of pulling out anyway.
Groaning, I moved forward again, sliding back and forth as slow and controlled as I could manage. But that could only last so long. As Bella's hands slid further down my back, my speed picked up a bit, needing the faster pace to finish.
"Fuck, Bella." Words spilled out of my mouth without control or hesitance. It was beyond anything I'd ever experienced. My momentum built until my climax hit me, stopping my movements completely before twitching and releasing into the condom.
I knew Bella hadn't come, but I also vaguely remembered that was normal. As I pulled out, I whispered that I loved her, knowing the words were cheesy, but I couldn't stop them from escaping, either.
"Love you, too," she said with a soft kiss to my shoulder, her hands finally releasing their sturdy grip on my dampened skin.
~Bella~
I laid on the bed, unable to move as Edward got up and discarded the used condom into the trashcan. I'd just had sex. I'd lost my virginity; it was over now. Everyone had told me that a girl's first time could hurt, but you got used to it pretty quickly and it ended up being good.
Well, those people were liars. Or had loose vaginas, whatever.
As Edward had pushed inside me, I'd felt like I was being torn apart from the inside. A fire blazed where the cuts were initiated, and the only way I could think to dispel some of the pain was to clench my eyes and my fists—anything to put the tension elsewhere. It hadn't worked. Not at all.
In fact, even with Edward removed, I was still in a whole shitload of pain. When he'd paused and asked me if I was okay, I couldn't bear to diminish the look of awe and happiness on his face, so…I lied. Sue me, okay? I lied to my boyfriend so that he'd continue to have sex with me, even when all I'd wanted to do was beg him to stop.
Ugh.
This wasn't how I'd imagined this to be at all.
Feeling hesitant and unsure, I asked Edward if I could use his shower. I didn't really need it. After all, he'd been the one doing all the work while I just cringed in shock. But I needed to cleanse and wipe away the pain, soothe it in any way I knew how.
"Do you want any company?" he asked, eyeing my naked form.
I placed my hands on his shoulders and kissed his smirking lips tenderly. "Not right now, if that's okay."
He nodded and waved me off to the bathroom, and I was grateful for the escape. Each step stretched and burned, tearing the cuts deeper and further with every small movement. I reached for the shower dial and turned it as high as it would go, steaming up the room quickly.
After locking in the door, I stepped in and let the water pelt down my back, the burn of the water nothing compared to the burn I still felt between my legs. Confused and in pain, I let out a choked sob, thankful that the heavy fall of water was able to cloak the sound of my tears.
My head fell forward, and my eyes trained themselves on the ground. I nearly fainted at the small river of pink swirling down the drain. Had I…Was I? Reaching a hand down, I realized that, yes, I was bleeding. I'd been stretched too far, despite being more than ready for him. I needed to get some clothes on and get out of there, preferably where I could curl into fetal position and be left to cry in peace.
I shut the shower off and grabbed a towel, drying myself off thoroughly and gently, careful not to pat too harshly between my thighs. I cringed again at the light pink coating of blood mixed with my own arousal that appeared on the light blue towel.
Carefully, I slipped on my uniform t-shirt and shorts, which were still in the bathroom from me changing into costume earlier, not bothering to go out and ask for my underwear. I had no inclination to hang out for a while. I just wanted to get clothed and get the hell out of there.
When I got back to Edward's room, he was lying back on his bed, his eyes closed and a small smile gracing his lips. I wondered if it was true what everyone said—did all guys fall asleep after sex? At least he'd put some pants on first.
Testing the theory, I made my way over to the side of the bed and leaned over to kiss him goodbye. His lips moved under mine lethargically, and his hands trailed up my back to keep me from standing upright again.
"Stay," he mumbled.
Even though I wanted to book it out of there as fast as possible, I couldn't bring myself to leave. I'd do anything for the boy in front of me.
Sighing, I climbed onto the bed, curling up beside him. His knees touched the backs of mine, and his arm draped across my stomach, pressing my back to his chest. My boy was a cuddler. Usually, I found it to be sweet, but now it felt the smallest bit oppressive, the midday heat starting to seep through the cabin walls and through the windows.
The sting between my legs dulled to a low ache with my legs pressed tightly together. And after a few minutes of slow inhales and exhales, I found myself drifting off into slumber.
A sharp shriek pulled me from my sleep, jolting me awake immediately.
"It smells like sex in here," Alice squealed, hopping from one foot to another.
Edward's arm pulled me closer, and I could feel his nose rub against the back of my head. "Ignore her and maybe she'll leave."
"Also, there's a condom wrapper on the floor," she said, completely monotone.
Edward stiffened behind me, and I groaned into the pillow. "No there's not," he said, and I could practically see his adorably confused face. "I threw that…"
Alice's wide grin stopped Edward short, and he flopped back onto the pillow behind me.
"Alice, stop tricking my boyfriend into telling you things. It's not nice."
She bit her lip and nodded solemnly, leaning back into Jasper, who'd come into the room behind her. "Of course. You'll be telling me everything as soon as we leave."
I sighed, not particularly wanting to talk about it right now, but I shrugged in acceptance anyway.
"Also," she continued matter-of-factly, "when have I ever claimed to be nice? Now, come on, you guys slept through dinner, and, LB, we need to be back on campus for bunk bonding in fifteen minutes."
Groggily, I pushed myself upright. We needed to be back in fifteen minutes? And we'd slept through dinner? That meant that we'd been napping for almost four hours. Crap.
"Say your goodbye, and let's get a move on." She clapped her hands at me, as if I were a dog, and my irritation started to grow.
Edward sensed my annoyance and ran a comforting hand up and down my back. "I'll see you at breakfast, okay?" I nodded, an uncomfortable knot appearing in my stomach.
"Love you." I leaned in for a quick kiss and blushed at his, "Love you, too."
As I got up from the bed, I couldn't help but wince again. You know when you have chapped lips and they chap so bad that they bleed? And then they heal and you're all excited, but then you go out in the cold again and they chap twice as badly, slashing your lip open all over again? Yeah, that had just happened…except with my vag.
A searing pain ripped through me with my first step, and it was so painful, I thought I would fall over.
I bit my lip, stifling any noise that would alert Edward of my discomfort, but Jasper saw. His eyebrow rose as he looked me up and down, but I simply rolled my eyes back at him.
Alice, oblivious, linked her arm through mine and led us out the door with a wave and a blown kiss. As soon as we were out the door, her interrogation started.
"How did this happen? Were you guys planning this? All of a sudden, you were just gone, and then I walked in there, and I just knew. Never have I ever seen that boy looking so content. And look at you, my LB, all grown up and welcome to the joyous world of sex!"
Alice paused and took a good look at me.
"Or not. What's up with the sad face, child? You don't look so joyous."
"I don't feel so joyous," I admitted. "I…I don't know what I'm feeling."
Alice nodded in understanding, and for once in her life, left me the fuck alone.
Back in my bunk, my girls were going crazy. Too much soda and cotton candy had revved them up far past the point of what I wanted to or could deal with at the moment. I felt like a shitty mom, but my head was spinning too fast for me to keep up with them.
As they played a rousing round of Nick, Nick, Kevin Jonas! (their fabulously creative version of duck, duck, goose), I slipped on my comfiest pair of cotton undies, pajama pants, and a wife beater.
Andie was the first to grab my hand and pull me towards them as soon as I was changed. "Come on, Bella! Come play with us."
I smiled happily and asked Rachel and Vicky to make room for me in the circle. What I hadn't prepared myself for, though, was sitting cross-legged on the hard wooden floor of the cabin. I couldn't stop the pained whimper from escaping as I took my spot, and soon all my girls hushed, looking at me with worried faces.
"Are you okay?" Rachel asked nervously.
I nodded, trying to swallow around the lump that had formed in my throat.
"You don't look okay," Danielle pushed. My group of thirteen-year-olds weren't idiots, and they knew I wasn't okay. I just needed to skirt around it as best as I could and put on a happy face.
"I'm fine. I just hurt myself a little bit during Special Day. You guys know how that happens."
The six girls nodded in agreement, but I could still see the hesitancy on their faces.
"How about we play Apples to Apples tonight?" I asked, pulling the box from under my bed.
They cheered loudly, still hyped up on sugar, but I was grateful that I'd been able to convince them to bond over a game that required sitting down. Thank God.
"You can sit on my bed if you want," Vicky suggested, and I actually took her up on it, thanking her immensely. She then plopped down between my legs and asked if I would french braid her hair. Happy for the distraction, I complied without hesitation. Also, the little thing had the most gorgeous thick red hair I'd ever seen, and I couldn't resist playing with it, either.
After a few hours, the girls began yawning, and I knew they were about to crash. As I stood up to let Vicky get into bed, the same crippling pain ran through my body, and I hissed at the pain.
"Bella," Andie whispered, tugging on my hand, "you should go to the infirmary and let them check you out."
"No, no, I'm fine," I assured her.
"Please? Just see if they can give you some medicine or something?"
It wasn't a bad idea, actually. I had no painkillers in the bunk, and the infirmary could give me some Aleve liquid gels and then send me on my way.
"Okay," I acquiesced, and a large smile spread across my campers' faces. Apparently, they'd all been worried about me.
After alerting their night duty that I was going to the infirmary, I made my way slowly to the little hut located just off the main campus drag. I knocked on the door tentatively, not wanting to wake any sleeping patients potentially in the beds there. The night nurse came to the door and opened it quickly with a large smile.
"Hey there, sweetheart, what can I do for you?"
I edged into the brightly lit room slowly and shifted uncomfortably. "Um, I was wondering if I could have some painkillers? Like Advil or Aleve or anything?"
She nodded, her grey eyes looking me up and down. "What seems to be the problem?"
How did I begin this one? I didn't think I could actually tell her that I'd very painfully lost my virginity and was experiencing what I thought could be a broken vagina. Crossing my arms, I whispered, "F-feminine problems?"
I hadn't meant it as a question, but she nodded just the same. Her pink scrubs made a comforting noise as they brushed against themselves as she bustled around, looking for pills in the cabinets behind her. She turned around quickly and put her finger up.
"On a scale of one to ten, where would you rate your pain?"
I chuckled without humor. "A fifteen?"
Her eyes went soft before she quickly turned around and poured three large blue pills into a small white paper cup. "What was the last thing you ate, sweetie?"
"Crap, um…I had a hot dog and some potato salad for lunch…" My stomach rumbled at the thought of food, and her eyes turned from soft to admonishing.
"How can you take care of your girls if you don't take care of yourself?" she asked rhetorically. "Don't you know that you should be eating low-sodium foods during your period? Salt increases water retention and worsens cramps." Shaking her head, she reached down and opened the door to a small refrigerator. She handed me a small container of applesauce, a banana, and a juice box. "This is all I have, so it'll have to do."
I thanked her, grateful for the semblance of a meal and downed all three things in record time. With a small smirk, she handed the pills and a small glass of water to me, which I also knocked back quickly.
"Darling, there's an open bed in the back if you want to use it. I know how hot and uncomfortable your cabins can be, and we're lucky enough to have air conditioning in here."
Air conditioning and a real bed sounded like absolute heaven to me, and I couldn't resist the temptation of staying overnight. I never had as a camper, but I'd kind of always wanted to. There was something a little homey and comforting about the infirmary.
"Are you sure?" I didn't want to push.
"It'll be just you and me here tonight. I'm absolutely positive. Just give me your name so I can let the head of night duty know where you are, and I'll call it in on the walkie."
I wrote down my name on a piece of paper for her, thanked her again, and headed down the hallway towards a small yellow room. The covers of the bed were cool, and the sheets calmed me down as I slipped between them, burrowing myself away from the rest of the world.
It wasn't as if my feelings for Edward had changed suddenly; they hadn't. But, I'd heard that having sex was supposed to bring people closer together, and I couldn't even bear the thought of being touched at the moment. Was I some sort of freak? I should have been ecstatic, but I just wasn't.
With a flick of the lights, I shrouded myself in darkness, curling up and letting the painkillers work their magic as I drifted off to sleep.
x-x-x
I awoke the next morning to the sound of low humming and pills being placed in a cup by my head. Assuming it was the nurse, bringing me more painkillers, I was confused when I heard the door shut and felt someone sit on the edge of my bed. I was even more confused when I felt a small prickling up and down my arm, the result of someone trailing their fingertips up and down the skin there.
"Edward?" I croaked, cracking an eye open. There, sitting on the edge of the bed with an apparent frown creasing his face, was my boyfriend. "Am I dreaming?"
"You should have told me you were sick, Bella."
Sleepily, I scooted backwards in the bed, making room for Edward to lie down facing me on the mattress.
"I'm not sick."
"You're in the infirmary. That's for sick people," he quipped.
"You're in the infirmary. Are you sick?" I replied. For having just been woken up, I was feeling pretty quick. Why was he in the infirmary? And was I really dreaming? I was still leaving that open as a viable option.
He held up his red and swollen finger, and I leaned forward and kissed it without any hesitation. "I got a splinter on my way out from breakfast just now. Someone fucked up the banister yesterday, and my finger took the brunt of it. Nothing a pair of tweezers and a kiss from you didn't fix completely." He paused and stared into my eyes, the intensity of it nearly making me gasp out loud. I felt naked. "Now, can you just tell me why you're here? Is it bad? Is that why you didn't want to tell me?"
"It's nothing rea—"
"Morning, sunsh—oh!" the nurse exclaimed, taking in the scene in front of her. I was under the covers and Edward was on top, but I'm sure it still looked pretty compromising. "Edward, what are you still doing here?"
"Visiting my girlfriend, Anne." Of course Edward was on a first name basis with the nurse.
"Well, that is just too sweet," she crooned, her eyes glazing over slightly as Edward unleashed a massive smile on her. "My husband was always too petrified of me to hang around when I was suffering from menstrual cramps. You're a better man than him!" She sighed and mumbled something like, "Not that I'm surprised," before clearing her throat and smiling widely. "I'll leave you two alone for a bit, but don't get too comfortable. First class starts in an hour."
The door clicked closed, and I released my nervous laughter. Edward didn't seem as amused.
"You don't actually have your period, do you?"
I bit my lip and shook my head. "No, I take the pill where I only get it four times a year so I don't have to worry about it during the summer…I…"
"So, what's wrong?" His hand brushed my hair away from my face, and his eyes looked pained as he waited for my answer.
"I'm okay, Edward." And as I said it, I finally realized the words were true. "I just wasn't prepared for—"
His face crumpled, the self-doubt and flagellation creeping up on him as I continued speaking.
"No, don't look like that." I placed my finger under his chin and kissed his lips. "I don't regret anything, Edward. It's just, I'm so in love with you, and I think I expected everything to be perfect and magical. But how realistic is that? We're not perfect and magical, Edward. We've been anything but that. We're uncomfortable and awkward and we pussy-foot around every issue we've ever had."
He finally cracked a smile at that. "We are pretty awkward."
I laughed, and as if on cue, my head tilted forward and smashed into his nose. He leaned back, grabbing his nose and nodded. "Point taken."
"But just because I think you broke my vagina doesn't mean I love you any less."
He scoffed. "Broke your vagina?"
"Mhm," I nodded, "with your monster cock. Obviously, my super tight snatch wasn't ready for all you had to give me."
Edward's eyes opened wide before he burst into giggles. Yes, the cutest little man giggles I'd ever heard. After he'd exhausted himself, his eyes turned serious again. "So, did I hurt you badly?"
I sighed. "Yes, I was in a lot of pain yesterday, and I haven't moved yet today so I don't really know what's going on there. But, I mean, I should have prepared myself for it. Did you realize it's only been a few days since you've been able to fit two fingers inside me comfortably?"
"God, Bella, I'm sorry."
"Don't apologize," I said sternly. "The pain doesn't matter. And just like with your fingers, we're going to get better with practice."
I didn't know where my self-assuredness was coming from, but the more I talked, the more I believed myself. And so did Edward.
"Right." A devilish smirk appeared on his face, and he leaned in to kiss me fiercely, awakening my arousal and making me whimper slightly.
I hit his chest with my fist and shook my head. "Not now…"
"Why not?" He moved his mouth to whisper just under my ear, and I shivered.
"Edward, we're in the infirmary!"
"So…?"
Moving tentatively, I snuggled my head into Edward's chest and wrapped his arm around my shoulders. I wasn't nearly as sore this morning as I had been yesterday. Thank God those painkillers had done their job.
"I can't believe I lost my virginity to you dressed as Anakin." I flushed and pressed my cheek into his shirt, inhaling his citric scent. I tilted my head upwards, wanting to kiss him, but his expression stopped me short. His eyes glowed with mischief, and I couldn't help but hit him again. "Please don't look at me like that."
"Why not?" He was quoting Star Wars to me. Dear lord, I was in nerd heaven.
"Because it makes me uncomfortable," I said defiantly.
"Sorry, my lady…my sweetest, now-deflowered Padme."
I frowned. "Heyyy, Ani definitely doesn't say that."
He nodded solemnly. "Yes, he does. I distinctly remember it."
And as we spent the next half hour debating movie quotes instead of harping on his apologies and my "injuries," I knew we were going to be okay.
Chapter End Notes: As you leave your review, please remember that this story is a fairly accurate representation of actual events that happened to me. Sex is different for everyone, and this is just how I experienced it.
But, hey, now that the deed is done…what's going to come next for these two?