A/N: I got a tablet~ Like finally! Too bad it's so difficult to use... but this whole chappie was typed out using it. I apologize for abandoning PJO for the Hetalia fandom.
Disclaimer: I do not own Percy Jackson and the Olympians. But don't we all wish we did? I don't own Baby You Wouldn't Last a Minute On the Creek by Chiodos either... the lyrics aren't used but the better half of the chapter is completely modeled after it.
Listen or else you seriously miss the effect of this chapter :|
The answer was internal.
"The only kind of injuries we can't heal completely are internal injuries," Will said, "If the situation arises the wounded demigod will have to be taken to a hospital."
I nodded. All us Apollo kids already knew this stuff, seeing as how we were the medics of camp. We were just having a review. I tuned out and looked around the infirmary. It wasn't really necessary- I already had the place memorized from: the number of cots to the posters about the affects of smoking and consuming too much ambrosia. I was out of the infirmary the second Will said we could leave.
I think I knew enough about injuries of the internal kind. About them not healing properly.
I started down the path to my cabin. I didn't even have to look where I was going, I'd memorized the way. I put on the Bose headphones Rachel had lent me after a particularly daunting 'therapy' session' and they muffled the sounds of camp and winter. Then it was all quiet, just whatever found it's way into my head, be they thoughts... or memories.
Like hell. Like eternal damnation. Like the bottom of Tartarus, like the depths of his heart. Dark, cold, empty and still except for taunts and cries that go unanswered. But if you scream enough, the screams bury you deep enough that you don't have to feel a thing.
But that doesn't mean it's not happening and in the end, skin and bones aren't the only things left bloody and broken. Then there's only silence.
I turned my music up as loud as it could go. I frantically dug my nails into my wrists. Think of anything, anything else. A distraction, a distraction was always a good thing, right? Apparently my subconscious agreed because I veered off the path leading toward the courtyard. Of course, because this is me we're talking about, I got lost within seconds. But I keep moving, one foot in front of the other. It was like listening to a car radio- but when you went under an overpass another signal cut through. Something was cutting through, taking me away. I appreciated it.
For a while anyway.
I should have known when a younger dryad tugged on my braid and shook her leaves, as if telling me to go back. I pulled away and went on. I was only only vaguely aware of the lack of light filtering through the tree tops because the 'radio broadcast' was still steering me into the woods. Imagine my surprise and horror when I stopped and realized where I was and who was there.
I whirled around and was about to take off but he saw me first.
"Stop!"
I did and regretted it. Nico strode up to me from his spot by the pond. He looked at me for a good long minute and I shivered under his stare. He was close enough to see everything, my sunken eyes, my perpetually bruised skin, the way I clutched my elbows like they were lifelines. His eyes... black as night, just as deep.
Nico raised a hand like I did to brush back Mathias' hair but I snapped, "Drop it."
Nico did but he looked stunned. I was just as surprised by my sudden fierceness. If if only I'd had it back then. I wanted to turn around and walk away and act like I'd never knew Nico but it was too late for an easy way out like that. Neither of us spoke and I couldn't handle the silence- not around him- so I spoke up,
"I-" we said simultaneously.
"You first-"
"No-"
Nico blew his thick bangs out his eyes in frustration.
"Just wait-" we said again.
His narrowed his eyes and I did the same. We stared each other down, refusing to be the one to make a mistake.
Finally, finally Nico talked.
"You look like crap."
If I had the energy I would have socked him then and there.
"Thanks. I've heard."
Quiet. Was that all he had to say? Staying here and listening to Nico was probably the worst idea I had ever had. It was Awkward Silence City. And when I was in Awkward Silence City and Uncomfortable Frightening Situation Ville my ADHD really acted up and I needed to run.
"Goodbye," I muttered before I backed away.
"Aline..."
That stopped me cold. It was the first time I'd heard him say my name in months. I was thinking- hoping, really- that he'd forgotten my name so I could someday forget his. But- yep, there it was- that funny feeling in my gut and the inability to do anything other than what he said. I stood still until he crossed the distance between us and put a hand on my shoulder, turning me to face him. A stifled cry worked it's way from my chest even Nico was being gentle, more gentle than he'd ever been. As if he could read my mind- or maybe he just saw the tears forming in the corners of my eyes- Nico let me go. But I still faced him. It was a surprise I could do that much.
Nico took a deep breath before he said anything,
"There's absolutely no reason for you to want to talk to me or forgive me. Because I've been horrible and awful and other words I can't get away with saying and if you want turn around and walk in a different direction that's fine. I suck at apologizing, I know, I've never really done it... so I'm sorry.
But you've hurt me too. And even I'm not that forgiving. Ask my sister. If there's anything I'm good at it's holding grudges and I've been trying so hard to hold one to you. But I can't and that's got to mean something, right?"
Did it? I wanted to ask but my throat constricted everytime I tried to say what I felt.
Nico looked as desperate as I felt, "Just put it all aside, what do you say? Whether it was contempt in the beginning, or anger, or... whatever else, I can't just ignore what I've felt."
"And I can't overlook what you've done." My voice was foreign to my ears, "Can we please just walk away? It could be like we never knew each other at all."
After a lull punctuated by nothing but clouds of breath Nico's eyes turned steely. I shivered- and not from the cold.
"Is that what you want?"
"Yes," I lied. I could only hide the truth. Maybe saying that was the best idea I had ever had.
Nico ran a hand through his hair, "Fine. If that's what you say."
I nodded numbly, all previous strength and motivation leaving me like air leaving a popped balloon. Nico opened his mouth like he was going try one last time to say what he felt but he didn't. He just walked away. I did the same.
I never looked back.
Lunar: And they loved every second of it.
Aline and Nico: Don't you go making me into some sort of closet masochist!
Lunar: Look, there they go, doing it again x3 One more time you guys.
Aline and Nico: Leave a review? Thank you!