So most of you did see that one coming, but that wasn't really supposed to leave you guessing or anything, it was pretty obvious.

Again I combined two chapters to speed things along.

Chapter 19

My eyes were so wide I was afraid they' pop out. He did this? He sent for me? I was to marry him?

He just kept looking at me. His gaze unchanged by my clearly shocked and disgusted one. I knew he had lied, but I never imagined he'd be capable of this.

"Stop being so rude, and show some respect." The Hawk behind me growled in my ear, but I didn't hear it. I was busy glaring Edward down.

It was beyond me how he could do this. I supposed he was a better actor than I gave him credit for. But why would he want me? I was merely someone he had to cure before he turned me in so he could get his oh so precious position, I wasn't this important in the least.

The Hawks behind me pushed me harder, and I had to tear my eyes away to catch myself; now I was standing by myself. Caught between a demon and a rock; the question was, which was which? They obviously expected me to walk to him, but my feet were rooted the ground on which they stood.

I heard a growl of discontent behind me; Edward's eyes went over my head to the men behind me. He pushed himself off the wall and toward me.

"I'll take it from here." He told them, and nodded, in an attempt to dismiss them.

"We have to stay with you at all times." One of them responded robotically; Edward sighed in frustration.

"Can you do it at a distance?"

"Yes sir."

Edward made a motion with his hand as if he were going to place it on my back, but he just kept it hovering over my spine; I was a little grateful for that. The Hawks kept about a ten foot distance, as he led me down the corridor. I despised the closeness of our bodies.

"So, you're 'sir' now." I snarked in a low voice, trying to keep quiet so the Hawks wouldn't hear. "This is a new low, Edward." I muttered, not looking at him.

We were both looking straight ahead, making sure to show we weren't having a conversation worth listening to.

"It's not what you think." He said coolly, glancing at anyone and everyone who looked our way.

"Lots of things weren't what I thought." It felt good to get the chance to tell him this; a small part of me was getting a form of relief.

"This was the only way I could talk to you." He breathed. He sent for me, to talk?

"And what happens when you're done talking? Pretty drastic measures to talk." I glanced over my shoulder at the Hawks that were trying to listen, but kept their distance as promised.

"I haven't worked that part out yet." He breathed uneasily.

"You like to abuse your position a lot don't you?" My voice dropped an octave. "Why would you need to talk to me anyway? You were just going to turn me over in the end."

"Look, I wasn't sure what I was going to do."

"Sure." I growled, wanting to throw my hands up; he was trying to feed me more lies.

"Just listen for a second please." He answered quickly, before throwing a glance over his shoulder. "I was going to tell you eventually."

"You mean when you turned me in?" I replied. "Even if I were to excuse the fact that you're a member of the Volturi, it hurts that you strung me along so long. You said I could live there, why would you let me get my hopes up like that? Why would you take it that far? Why would you go so far to delude me?"

"I didn't know what to do; I wanted you to stay, but then again you couldn't."

"Then why did you say yes?" I replied in disbelief.

"I don't know." He whispered heatedly, stealing a fleeting look at me. We kept walking, but in silence for a while, before I spoke again.

"I have to hand it to you, Edward." My voice cracked and I had to bite my lip. "You really have a knack for this two-faced thing. You know for a while there I thought you really had a soul." He tripped up. I paused, without looking, until he continued to walk, but at a more struggled pace.

"That wasn't an act." He replied shakily.

"What else did you lie about? Is your real name even Edward?" My eyes began stinging, but I bit them back.

"I didn't lie about everything—"

"But you lied."

"Yes, but—"

"But, what?"

"I only lied to keep you in the dark, and my name really is Edward…" He added unnecessarily.

"Is that the only thing that are true?" I said darkly, though it hurt inside. He didn't reply; I had hit the nail on the head. "What else did you lie about?" I asked, my stomach clenching and unclenching.

"You'll hate me."

"I already hate you."

He let out a trembling breath, "It's my age."

"…How old are you?" I asked suspiciously. He didn't meet my gaze.

"Seventeen."

I gulped, "How long have you been seventeen?" I asked, assuming his age was part of his act.

He sighed. "A while." I looked at him incredulously and he continued. "I've been telling people I was seventeen ever since I was fifteen. It's part of the assigned alias."

I bit back tears. "How old are you really?"

He didn't meet my gaze. "Twenty-four."

My feet got tangled up in each other and I went flying onto the ground. I hit it hard; I was vaguely aware of Edward kneeling down to help me up. My stomach lurched, and I truly feared I would throw up.

Twenty –four. So much older; seven years older. He was seven when I was born; he hit puberty when I was learning my alphabet.

He took hold of me, to help me up but I jerked away from with a hiss.

"Don't touch me!" I growled, almost forgetting to whisper. Ugh, twenty-four!

I got to my feet and smoothed out my hair, trying to regain composure, unsuccessfully.

"Wow," I exhaled. "That's a big lie." I snarled in disgust.

"I'm sorry." He sounded genuine. "We have to lie about ourselves, except our name. Too many aliases get too confusing." He finished.

"It sounds like you belong here." To anyone else, it would have sounded like a compliment, but it was really a dirty insult. "Why would you do this anyway? What would your mom say?" I struck a nerve with him by using the personal 'mom' instead of 'mother' like he was used to me saying.

He stopped dead in his tracks for a second, staring at me with shock and hurt evident in his eyes; I suddenly felt guilty. But why did I feel guilty? What he did was so much worse.

"What?" He choked out. And like that, the Edward I'd known was back. I could see him out in the open now; I had pierced the mask.

One of the Hawks cleared their throats, Edward kept walking, and I followed suit.

"I know what your mom would say," I started, getting up the nerve to continue. "In fact I know exactly what she would say if she were here. If she could see you, so tainted."

"You have no clue what you're saying." He sounded truly hurt, and angry; I knew I shouldn't have cared, but a fresh wave of guilt engulfed me.

"I know I'm just a kid to you, but I know precisely what I'm saying."

"How? How could you possibly understand?" He growled.

"I knew her. I knew her personally." I didn't turn to see his face. "For years she was my teacher; then one day, your birthday to be exact, she snapped. She couldn't take the choking anymore. And she got sent to jail. And, yes, jail is every bit as terrifying as I told you." I still didn't move to see his face, but I heard a small choking sound.

"It's not possible."

"I think we've breached the boundary of impossible more than once. I got my memory back by the way." I muttered as an aside.

"After she snapped, I did too. I found this necklace and I lashed back as well. She inspired me; but my mother didn't take too well to that. So, disoriented with a head wound my mother caused me, I came to this side through that hole." I let out, the words coming out in streams.

I brought my eyes to watch him finally; he was staring straight ahead, but his emotionless mask was cracked, it was clear my words were crushing him. He needed to know this, but I could see he was breaking inside. His eyes were filled with pain and longing.

"I got caught on the other side when I ran away after I found out— I got sent to jail. I met her there." My voice raised a few octaves; the inevitable tears were boiling to the surface. "Do you know what she said?" I bit my lip.

"What?" He asked softly, his voice just as shaky as my own.

"She broke because it was your birthday… and Edward?" I paused before I continued; I wanted to make sure I had eye contact. We locked eyes. "She loves you and misses you more than anything in the world."

Edward was good at hiding emotion, although his eyes were red, he did not cry. I could tell he was trying not to. I hoped he was in pain, he was bringing this on himself; but a small twinge kept throbbing in the back of my head and at the bottom of my heart.

I threw all this at him, trying to pierce him even further; he deserved it after all. I could see it was working.

"After that she couldn't stop talking about you. But when I left, she was going slipping away like the others, losing her mind. I didn't want to leave her; she can't get food by herself anymore. I had to put it up to her mouth in order for her to eat it." This was hard for me talk about, but I pushed.

I covered my mouth with my hand, putting my loathing and hate on the backburner to feel the sadness and guilt I had from the absence of Miss Garratt.

"So yes, I think I know what I'm talking about." I finished with a sting of venom in my voice.

He stayed quiet and composed; but he was impacted, the mask of calm was just barely stretched long enough to cover up his emotions. I could see it was cracking a little more each second.

"Why would you torment me like this?" He said, his voice trembling a bit.

I was taken aback. Even though this was the exact thing I was trying to resurrect. The words weren't his, he usually had a playful exterior, but this was raw; raw and full of pure hurt. I was thinking maybe I'd taken it too far, but I pushed it back at him.

"The same way you did to me." I replied simply trying to not let the guilt leak into my voice. "Plus, I thought you needed to know what you were doing. The very people you live by are the very same ones slowly killing the one you love the most; think about it." I had thought explaining it like this would relief my remorse and make me feel just a miniscule amount better; it did not.

"I'm not sorry." He said calmly, staring ahead, despite the grilling I just gave.

"For what?" How could he not be sorry?

"I am sorry for lying; but I'm not sorry for sending for you. For one thing, you were in jail anyway, second I needed to talk to you, and three I'm glad you told me about her." He closed his eyes and looked over his shoulder at the Hawks behind us; he was also good at changing the subject faster than the speed of light.

"I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"I'm sorry, that you're not sorry." I said coldly. "I'd rather be back in The Hole than be here. I'd rather be dead." I spat; my heart pounded with adrenaline as the words came flooding out.

"I'm glad you're not dead." Was all he said back; I had nothing to say to that.

"I'm not marrying you." I added suddenly, making sure he got that loud and clear. I thought about it, "Not on my own free will." I obviously had no say in the matter.

"I know." He said, solemnly.

We came to a set of double doors; large and heavy they stood as a symbol of fear, I could only imagine what was on the other side, for a moment, I almost forgot Edward's presence.

Edward pushed both of them open, and a large, open room was revealed; the walls were stone, and the only furnishings were three thrones and a few chairs to their left and right, making up the Core's seats. One, however, was empty.

This was evidently the Core.

I wanted to shrink back, a strange jittery feeling washed over me the second I stepped into the room; the aura felt wrong. Like I'd just stepped into a warzone; like I was in enemy territory.

Edward then placed his hand firmly on my waist. I wanted to pull away, and slap him until he passed out, but I saw he was staring straight at the men in the three thrones, watching their reaction. I knew if I were to do something that looked out of the ordinary, I would come under suspicion. He saw that too.

"Hello Aro, Caius, and Marcus." Edward greeted, bending to the floor to bow; I stood awkwardly.

Was I to bow as well? What was I to do? I wasn't familiar with the customs here; I just rocked back and forth on my heels and stared off into space.

Edward tugged on my wrist urgently as an indication to bow; and I hit the floor too, wanting to stay safely off the menacing looking men's hit list. No matter how much I despised it, I lowered my head as well. I wanted to spit on the shiny, reflective floor.

"No need for such formality, you will soon take this seat." The man in the middle throne said in a voice that told me he was merely saying that for show, and that he clearly expected every ounce of submissiveness he was receiving.

Edward rose, jerking the back on my dress upward in a quick motion saying I should stand too; as soon as I came up he whispered in my ear, "Don't look him in the eye, keep your head down, and stand behind me." I obeyed despite my desire not to. He was training me as we went along, on what to do. A part of me was grateful, but that part was overshadowed by the revulsion I held.

"So," The man started, I felt his probing eyes on me. "This is the one you have chosen?" I could hear in his voice he wasn't at all impressed despite his cheery demeanor, as no one else was.

"Yes." Edward replied shortly, I wanted to murmur 'no', under my breath, but that might have been too much to ask for. I just stood silently by his side, trying not to attract to much unwanted attention.

"Why?" He asked, like he couldn't believe he would ever pick me, or anyone anywhere would; let's just have a 'insult the new girl like she's not in the room listening to everything you're saying' party. "I apologize for the rudeness, but I must know. What draws you to her?" I could feel his curious, probing gaze on me the entire time.

I peeked up at Edward from between my hair; I was going to hear this. He didn't meet my gaze on purpose, and a blush crept up his neck.

"Her hair." He replied simply. I thought he would have been a little more creative.

"Hm…" Aro didn't sound too convinced. "Fine, you should be wed tomorrow, and we will once again have the last place in our family filled." He motioned to the empty chair at the end; I stole a glance at it.

So, Edward needed me to get a place in the Core. I should have known he would find a way to use me as his ticket to power.

As we turned to walk out, I stood up on my tip toes to look like I was whispering affectionately in his ear, but really I was muttering, "I detest you." I rocked back on my heels and kept walking.

He put his arm around my waist and leaned down to say, "I know."

He (along with the Hawks) dropped me off at my room. Ugh, my room. He ordered the Hawks to stand behind the corner so we could have a few seconds of privacy. We had different ideas of what the privacy would entail.

The second they could no longer see us, I ripped my hands out of his, and gave him the most disgusted, hate filled look I could muster. He just looked back, his eyes empty and dead, with just a small hint of hurt in them.

"Go to hell." I muttered; feeling my eyes stinging as the world around me dropped and I was left alone in my hatred and solidarity.

He just stood there as still as a statue, not moving, almost as if I hadn't spoken at all; after a few seconds, he shut his eyes, and his eyebrows downcast in an expression that I had never seen on him. It wasn't hurt, for it was more intense than that. Although I wanted to stay and decipher it, I was still filled with rage.

With that, I slammed the door in his face, knowing I could never open it myself again.

I twisted around and leaned against the door, and as soon as I had my self-control, it was gone. A powerful sob ripped through me like a surprise attack. I clutched my chest, trying to smother it.

I covered my face with my shaky hands and sank to the floor, sobbing and coughing into them. My body rocked in sync with my sobs, and I let all the emotions out I had contained with Edward around. I hadn't known I'd had so much angst and ache built up; but now it was all being released.

What are you doing? I asked myself, stop being stupid. Get it together. So, over and over, I tried to regain grip on myself and possibly retain some form of pride, but it kept slipping out of my grasp. Every time I tried to grab it, I was hit with another pang of pain.

I bawled and sobbed until the sun went down over the horizon; the shadows in the room grew longer and longer and eventually disappeared altogether.

Miss Garratt, I cried internally, Oh please forgive me! I'm sorry. I failed.

You did all you could… The voice muttered meekly, comforting me. I didn't reply, but I relished the reassurance it was offering.

Alice, please forget me. Move on, get a new best friend. I shouted in my mind, hoping somehow she'd hear me. I'm sorry.

I faced all of my demons; everything that had happened to me, and things that I'd done. Even the good things that came of this catastrophe mocked me with wicked fangs; my breathing went from relatively normal, to broken gasps.

My heart clenched as I ran through my conversation with Edward over and over in my head; my weeping was terrible, it was strangled and so full of pain. Revealing everything I'd been feeling.

I wasn't sure how long I blubbered until I realized that when I closed the door, I never heard Edward's footsteps indicating he had ever walked away.

I suddenly felt as if I wasn't alone.

A cracked, pained, familiar, voice whispered directly from the other side of the door.

"I'm sorry…"

Where was I?

I had gone to sleep in the bed last night, but I felt no covers or cushion; I was reclined. It felt like I was in a chair. I lifted my head about half an inch and moved my wrists, but they were restrained.

Why was I so tired? This wasn't natural. It was like I was stuck in a fog I couldn't escape from.

Opening my eyes, the room was still spinning, but I could just barely make out the shapes around my wrists. I focused in harder.

My wrists were tied to the chair in which I sat. I vaguely acknowledged it; I didn't have the energy to be disturbed by it just yet.

"I think she's waking up!" A high pitched, way too happy voice exclaimed; I heard more voices giggling.

Groaning, I tried to sit up in the reclined chair; I was confused for few moments, for I saw something in front of me, but I hadn't a clue what it was. When I looked at it closely, I recognized it. It was me. I was looking at myself in the mirror.

I realized I was sitting at the vanity in my room, tied to the chair, and I was wearing something different than what I wore to bed.

I looked to my sides; women were sitting on their knees, holding various things like hairbrushes, nail files, and other things I couldn't even distinguish. Most of them had excited grins on their perfectly beautiful faces.

"What…" I started to say, but my voice was slow and slurred; I had to take another breath just to get out another word. "What's going on…?"

"We're preparing you for the wedding, silly!" One of them smiled jovially; although my mind was slow, I knew what she was talking about. I wanted to groan, but as soon as the thought entered my head, it was gone.

I had to ask once again what was going on. They giggled.

"Oh, you must not be over that sedative we gave you." She laughed, covered her mouth with her mouth in a dainty motion.

"Why…why would you…?" I breathed, closing my eyes once more.

"It was for your own good, we did all the plucking and waxing while you were out. Trust me, you'll thank us later. We didn't want you to wake up." She said it as if it was such an obvious answer and I was an idiot for even asking.

"My hands?" I asked softly, wondering why they tied my hands to the arm rests.

"Well that's just for security. We wouldn't want you messing up our work." She nodded; her eyes were bright and honest, like she thought this answer was something that should click with me like the answer to a math problem.

"Or running away." Another one said. Oh, I saw why now. They had sensed I wasn't happy go lucky about this, and they knew I would try to run. They drugged me and tied me down. They were certainly subtle. But this girl was different for she didn't seem happy at all; nor sad. Her eyes held malice and hate in them, and she looked strikingly young. She had to be thirteen or fourteen. She saw me studying her and grimaced further. "I'm Jane—spouse to Alec."

I nearly choked on my own spit. "You're a wife?"

She glared at me. "Absolutely." She said with disdain in her voice, like being a wife was a rank to be proud of.

I swallowed the bile in my throat and I looked down; my legs were smoother than they'd ever been. Apparently that was what they meant. But as I glanced down at my legs, I noticed something else.

I was wearing a long, white satin dress, like a gown; it was thin and stuck to me like a second skin.

"Is this the dress?" I asked, gaining more consciousness and control of my mind.

"No, this is just what we put on you while we were getting you prepared." Another girl popped up.

I looked at my chest on instinct to look for the necklace, but I found it was bare. I started panicking.

"Where's my necklace?" I shrieked scouring the room for it. I looked to them, with pleading eyes.

"It didn't match the dress." One girl shrugged as if it were no big deal. "It's a gaudy thing, really. I promise you won't miss it." She looked away and started arranging something on the vanity in front of me.

"Give. It. Back!" I screamed in a commanding voice that seemed to surprise them; they jumped back in fear. A few cowered behind each other.

"Give it her!" One of them whispered hastily. "She's scaring me!"

One girl came to me with shaky hands and put it around my neck once more; I sighed, feeling it settle as a part of me. It eased my anxiety a little.

Now that I was fully awake, I got to get a good look in the mirror of myself.

My skin was smooth, and my eyes were lined with black, my lashes were big and dark. My lips were the strangest shade of red, and there was pink on my cheeks. This confused me; I'd always wanted to wear mascara or something, but not a full new identity.

"What did you do to my face?" I asked belatedly, just staring at the reflection in the mirror.

"We made it beautiful." One murmured scornfully. "You should consider yourself lucky you get to marry him."

I turned to the girl who had said it, with my mouth hung open. Was he desirable to them?

"Why does everyone keep saying that? I don't feel lucky." I took my eyes away from the mirror, and gazed out the window.

"Aside from that, we're not done with you, so be good and just lay back and let us work our magic; it's so rare we get to." One interrupted, immediately getting something from the table. "Close your eyes."

I did; I felt her brush something on my eyelids. "What do you mean?" I inquired, referring to the 'rare' part.

"When someone gets admitted into the Core, they have to get married to make an heir to carry on their position—" One started.

"—But recently, Royce— may he rest in peace— passed away, and he had no heir. So they picked the most successful agent, being your future husband." It was like they shared one brain, but they were just different bodies.

There was a gorgeous blond in the group; her hair was long and golden, and her eyes were piercing blue. She was easily the most beautiful girl I'd ever seen; her eyes were downcast and she had a constant frown on her face. Except when they mentioned Royce; then her cheek turned up. Why would she be happy about his death?

"Rosalie here is a widow now," one started, placing a hand on her shoulder. "Royce was found in his bedroom stabbed to death. Our husbands believe it was an act from the Resistance…" The look on her face made it clear that she held suspicions of Rosalie. "But I think it's weird that Rosalie was coincidentally missing during his assassination."

Wait….was she accusing her of murdering her husband?

Rosalie's grin gave me all the answer I needed. At least one of them was sane.

Another wife looked uncomfortable and started talking. "Once in a blue moon, we get to do weddings; the next wedding was scheduled for at least another fifteen years; when you get into the Core, you're in it for life. Demetri's son, the oldest, is going to be wed when Demetri dies." The other continued.

"When this opportunity popped up, we begged our husbands to go all out for you, the newest wife; you only get married once." She finished with a smile.

How could they be so sickeningly happy?

"You never got to choose did you?" I whispered; they looked away from me.

"We were chosen, we were blessed." One whispered, busying herself with something, not meeting my gaze.

"This is a blessing?" These women really were under a spell of some kind, for there was no excuse for such ignorance.

Staring at these women, these ignorant, stifled women, I felt a wave of sadness and remorse wash over me. The school always taught that the separation of the genders was a step in the right direction, for feminism and woman independence. When in truth, it was a step backwards. We were back to the way were even before the old days; women were once again stifled, scared, and completely at the mercy of their male companions, expected to be beautiful and obedient. These women were brainwashed into believing this was a dream, when really we were living in a nightmare.

"Now," one perked up. "If you have any questions…you can ask us." They laughed and covered their faces in embarrassment. Except for the two exceptions.

Was I missing something? Questions about what? Why were they even gigglier than before? And how was that even possible?

"Questions about what?" I asked; this question seemed to be even more hilarious to them. They laughed even harder.

"Questions about after the wedding." She looked at me like I was supposed to comprehend, but I just stared back blankly. Whatever they were trying to get across to me, it was going over my head.

"What happens after the wedding?" I said slowly, hoping to coax out this apparently hysterical joke.

They laughed the hardest at this.

As elusive as it had been moments ago, it suddenly clicked with me like a spark to a fire.

Oh. 'Questions'. The wedding night. A humiliated blush crept up my neck and engulfed my face; I thought, in the back of my mind, I knew what they were talking about all along. I just really, really didn't want to think about it.

I prayed that sometime today, a freak thunder storm would break out despite the sunny day, and kill me with a bolt of lightning, or perhaps a flash flood were to come and drown me before that time came. Or maybe I'd just drop dead of embarrassment first. Creating an heir with Edward was not something I looked forward to doing.

Nonetheless, I was either going to prevent it, or die trying. That's the only thing I was sure of.

The girls kept working on me, putting gels in my hair, they even considered putting extensions in my hair, but they decided against it, thankfully. They put a weird scrub on my hands, arms, and legs; it was rough and I wondered what it was for. Then afterward, my skin was so soft, I couldn't believe it.

My heart pounded like a hummingbird's wings the whole time they were fixing me up.

I finally spotted an enormous, puffy white dress in the corner. I dreaded it. A shiver of disgust went rocketing through me. Not because it wasn't gorgeous (which it was), but because I knew that it was a symbol of my lack of freedom. It was to seal my fate.

Whenever one of them moved to get it, I was restless. I struggled and tried to fight back when they released my hand cuffs.

I tried to fight back, but they found a way to get it on. It was long sleeved, and beaded intensely, but the neckline plunged to give the illusion of cleavage. I covered my chest with my hands. The skirt was puffy and the train seemed to stretch for miles.

My breathing got shallow as I started collapsing inside myself; they ignored me, in their own happy world.

I shivered as they finished their work. They gazed upon me with the widest grins I'd ever seen. My face must have been as pale as a ghosts' because of the terror that raged within me; but I bet they couldn't tell, because of all the layers of make-up.

I began to shake my head, and I looked down at my knees.

"Oh, don't be sad, it's just anxiety, it will all go away once you're married." The one who's name was Jessica (she had told me, in an attempt to make conversation), "Isabella, you're going to be so happy."

She bent down behind me and put her face by mine as we both gazed into the mirror, and then squeezed my shoulders in an attempt at reassurance.

"You mean, as happy as you are?" I asked, meaning to be sarcastic; she didn't take it that way. She beamed and nodded in response.

I stood up, taking her hand in mine, and she walked me to the door, with the other following gleefully behind us like my own posse of paper dolls.

The Hawks were waiting outside the door to go to the place where my free life would end. My breathing grew labored and I started gasping. An ache in my throat shot through me, and it felt as if it were closing up. I wrapped my hand around my neck, and put one hand on my heart.

Just breathe, just breathe. I chanted to myself as my legs wobbled as we walked down the long passage.

We reached a separate set of double doors; they left me no time to prepare. They yanked them open and I saw what lie ahead of me.

Edward, stood at the end, dressed similarly to how he was yesterday, a minister at the end, and all of the Core sat waiting for me. They turned to me and stared at me with many various versions of disgust.

How could my life take such a turn?

Before, I was living in a choking world and I longed for what was being withheld; now, I was being brutally exposed to everything I'd been protected from. I wished I could regret all of the events that took place— although my disdain for Edward still burned brightly somewhere inside me, I didn't want to erase what happened. I discovered my father, the truth, new friendships, beauty, and an untapped reservoir of emotions inside myself.

But I despised what lie ahead of me; my life was doom from here. And I had no say in the matter.

I stared at Edward and only Edward; he looked back at me with a hint of regret. It looked like he had failed at something. But in truth, he'd succeeded in this sick game.

Despite everything that happened, I was still painfully new to interacting with the opposite sex. I was just now learning to balance on my feet at this issue that had presented itself only a few short weeks ago. The Crazies had said many things about the male population, many false, and many true. There was only one thing I was positive of right now, from what they had told me.

Marriage was supposed to be a holy, sacred thing. There was nothing sanctified or righteous about this; there was no beauty. This was wrong in so many ways. And I was the only one who saw this. I was shocked the Volturi even offered up the wedding pretense; giving the appearance that I had any say in the matter.

I wasn't alone in this, though. I wasn't the first to go through this. Those women were much stronger than I gave them credit for; they were trying to ease me into this life, seeming as resisting did nothing; they knew that before I had.

A Hawk then nudged me forward, and as much as I didn't want to, I started the endless march down the aisle I never thought I would take.

But, as I was walking, something caught my eye; more like more than one someone.

At least a dozen children sat in two pews, all staring at me. These must have been the children of the members of the Core. All the boys sat to my left, they were the first ones I noticed.

They were handsome boys, considering they were bred from the best. Their eyes held the presence of adult knowledge; some glared me, as if this was what I deserved. Others held nothing in the eternity of their eyes— absolutely nothing. They appeared dead, cold, and emotionless. Just like their fathers.

I slowly moved my head to look at the girls whom sat to my right. Their backs were erect, and they were flawless in looks. But what I found in their gaze struck me more than the boys had. Their eyes were dominated with numbness, sadness, and over all, fear. Their eyes held no light, such as a child's should.

They feared those boys that sat only a few feet away from them; feared them like the devil himself. I had no doubt in my mind that, that was their fathers' intentions the whole time.

I started to die inside, for these children were so much worse off than I was. The girls lived in constant fear, and the boys were being stifled of their childhood and learning to be as sick and twisted as everyone else here.

And without consciously knowing it, I made a decision. Not with my head, for I felt a deep burning my heart, like the flame that had followed a fated spark.

Pride and Common Sense had no say—they didn't matter. My problems and my issues didn't matter.

For once, it wasn't about me.

From this point on, if this continued the way it appeared it would, it would never be about me anymore.

Even if all else failed (which it probably would), even if I was condemned to a life of misery, a prisoner in a fairy tale, a life to being a happy go lucky, thoughtless wife, it wouldn't matter.

I was expected to provide a child— but the first thing I felt was no longer fear for myself, or disgust toward Edward. I felt a deep terror for my future child.

If I were to have a boy, he wouldn't be my own. He would belong to the Volturi. He would be brought up to be a monster, and I would have to go through the staggering pain of watching him grow up like that.

And if I were to have a girl…that would be a million times worse. A girl, to live in utter fear constantly, to always be stifled, to grow up without any knowledge of what freedom, friendship or love felt like. That would be so much worse. At least I felt those briefly before coming here.

I wasn't afraid anymore. I knew what I had to do.

I refused to damn a child to this life, especially my own, even if I had to be. I would soon be slaughtered in cold blood before I let that happen.

It ended here. It ended now.

I reached the place to where Edward stood, he was staring at me with an apologetic gaze; my face must have looked so twisted. He must have thought it was because I didn't want to marry him (which was true), but I had much more troubling matters concerning me. Ones he couldn't possibly comprehend.

If I were to do this, I would have absolutely no chance at freedom; I wouldn't get a room to myself, I would never see sunlight again, I would never see anything ever again. But dying in the place of someone you love, seems like a good way to go.

The secret of my crossing The Wall had been the most crucial secret throughout this ordeal— the deadly secret that should never be told. But now, it was necessary. And I was about to tell it to an entire audience of people who were more than prepared to kill me in a second.

I stared into Edward's eyes. I wasn't sure what I was looking for; remorse? He just looked back, searching my own gaze; my decision was clear in my eyes, what I was about to do was in my stare.

His eyes widened in sudden comprehension and his eyes screamed, 'don't do it!' louder than words could have. His green eyes were burning with the ferocity of the sun.

Ignoring him, I turned to face everyone; with a deep breath, I kissed my assumed innocence goodbye.

"I crossed The Wall." I spoke in a loud and clear voice that reverberated off the walls.

I held my breath, waiting for the screaming and the tackling.

I was shocked when a light chuckle came from one of the members of the Core, causing everyone else to erupt into violent laughter.

My cheeks burned red, and I glared angrily at the man who had started it.

"I mean it!" I shouted it, more laughs echoed off the walls.

"What a stupid girl." A Volturi member said to another, not bothering to cover it up.

"Of course you have sweetie." A wife replied slowly, as if I were slow. "You had to get here somehow."

"No," I shouted. "I mean before I was chosen, I came to this side. I lived here for a few weeks even!" How could they not believe me when it was the truth? The secret I'd kept so dearly this whole time, and now I presenting it to them, and they scoff at it! I felt Edward's hand on my forearm, trying to drag me back, but I hissed and jerked away.

"Don't you dare touch me, Edward!" I shrieked in a sudden burst of anger.

I hadn't planned this next part, but it just kind of came out.

I brought up my hand and slapped him freshly across the face. When my hand connected with his cheek, he went reeling back. That had felt much better than I had intended.

Everyone got quiet at this.

Suddenly, many hands were on me at once, dragging me to the ground.

My face got slammed on the carpeted floor, and a hand kept it there. I was being held down in every place possible so I couldn't so much as even twitch. Pain, rang up from my cheek and into my head, I groaned as they pressed me even harder into the floor.

"You insolent girl!" One of members said from their seat, with the burn of defiance in his voice. "How dare you commit such an act of disloyalty?"

"You will pay for your idiocy." Caius said quietly, rising from his seat. His quietness and calm seemed more deadly than the anger bursting from everyone else.

Suddenly the double doors burst open once more, and a few Hawks walked in, with an angry, knowing look in their eyes; my head had been turned to the side.

"She is guilty of more than just disobedience." The one in the middle said coolly. Suddenly, three people were brought in. I gasped.

"Alice!" I screamed, the Hawk grabbed me by hair, and lifted my head up once more. Oh no, I groaned to myself, just before he slammed it again into the floor.

I felt the Hawk above me move away, and gentler hands were on me; the hand holding my head down was gone, so I could look up.

Edward was by my side, with his cheek red, he tried to lift me up off the ground, but he was interrupted.

"Leave that swine on the floor, where she belongs." Aro commanded; Edward hesitated, but he looked to me first. I just stared at him, all of my pain seeping through my now very weathered façade.

"I'm sorry Bella!" Screamed Alice, from wherever she was. "It wasn't on purpose!" The Hawk behind her twisted her arm, she yelled out in pain, a high pitched scream. I lunged, wanting to help her, but Edward lightly held me back.

She had told on me. Like a school girl reporting something to a teacher. She had told them where I had been; the sting of slight disloyalty was fleeting in my heart before it vanished. How could I blame her? It wasn't her responsibility to keep my secrets. Heck, I would have told on me too.

The other two people they had, made both Edward and I gasp.

They had Emmett and Jasper in their arms; both looking beaten and bruised. I cried out as I surveyed them. Emmett's usually endless aura of happiness was now beaten down to a pulp. He looked defeated. And Jasper, when he saw me, he didn't look at me with hatred. He looked like he didn't even have the energy to consciously recognize me. Or Edward.

Edward however, didn't cry out like I had, he stayed quiet in himself. Knowing that another display like mine would give him the same fate I had.

Finally, he took me by the forearm and helped me to my feet.

"This girl," The Hawk started again. "Has been on this side previous to her being selected." His voice rang out with authority and finality.

The whole room was silent again; the women and children who were cowering from the excitement, looked up with wide eyes. So did the members of the Core.

Marcus rose with an astonished expression on his face. "It is true…" He whispered. Fear was struck into my heart, for I could sense the storm coming.

"Your previous crime was mercifully forgiven, for you are still young, and verbal defiance's are, though still serious, are able to be over looked. But this… this is unforgivable. No matter how much he may want you, for reasons that elude me, you are a criminal; and you are undeserving of the honor." He pointed to Edward accusingly; he then turned his head slightly and nodded to the Hawks.

In a quick motion, a Hawk moved to push Edward away from me; but he was prepared, and he shoved back with the reflexes of a cat. The Hawk went flying into the one behind him.

That ignited a fire amongst everyone. The Hawks were soon all over Edward, tackling him and prying him away. Although he was a good fighter, I knew he couldn't win.

Despite my hatred, I found myself screaming; screaming for them to stop hurting him. It made no sense, since I had told him how much I loathed him multiple times and how I'd slapped him only moments ago.

Hands were on me, and I was forced to my knees. Disoriented, I looked up and focused on what was about to take place.

My eyes widened as an unmistakable glimmer shone above my head.

The Hawk in front of me held a frighteningly long and sharp sword high above his head, ready to bring it down on me.

I closed my eyes and hung my head, waiting for the strike.

I wanted to say that I didn't fear death, so I could go down with a few shreds of pride and grace—but that couldn't have been farther from the truth.

I crumbled inside myself like a child; I absolutely trembled at the idea of death. Especially this one. I feared it like nothing else in the world; nobody alive truly knew what happened after death. Nobody knew in truth what Heaven, Hell, and Purgatory looked like. I feared the unknown.

I supposed, I had it coming one way or another. I now realized I never would have been able to live my life like that, stifled and being the perfect daughter to my mother. My life was never going to go smoothly, ending with a clean slate, even if none of this had happened, it would have happened some other way. Perhaps that's why I watched my behavior so much more cautiously than some others, because I somehow knew there something in me that was going to be free eventually.

I asked myself if I regretted anything; I wanted to regret ever defying Mother. I thirsted to regret Edward; I wanted to resent ever knowing him. But it was as hard as if I were trying to move The Wall itself— it wouldn't happen.

I shut my eyes, banishing the gruesome image of the sword about to strike down on me; would it hurt? I prayed not.

The sound of air rushing hit my ears as the sword started to come down.

I saw many faces in that split second before it was about to hit me, Mother, Alice, Miss Garratt, Jacob, Emmett, even Jasper, Carlisle, and Edward. Everyone who had affected me one way or another was there to bid me farewell in my head.

As soon as the motion had started, it abruptly stopped. The light stopped seeping through my eyelids, and I felt a presence. My eyes snapped open.

Edward had somehow broken free of that mob. He was now crouched between me and the Hawks trying to force the sword down. I was too shocked to do anything but stare.

A drop of deep crimson landed on the back of my hand. My eyes trailed upward to the source.

The sword had hit something; Edward had stopped it with his own palm.

The sword was now frozen; half of it was cutting into his hand, and half in the air. Edward's eyes were defiant, and held burning determination.

My mouth merely hung open. Why had he done something so stupid? Now he would be in trouble as well. But why did I care? I shouldn't have, it was only what he deserved. But my heart tugged, as he blocked the blade from my head; he let out little gasps of strain as he held it with a death grip.

A feeling arose with strength and conviction, an uncontrollable force; a feeling I had abandoned not too long ago. A feeling I'd been trying to smother unsuccessfully. It filled me completely to the point of bursting.

Although I was angry at Edward, angry beyond words, I didn't hate him, I never have, never could. Although my mind had screamed that I did, it was feeble and short lived; like I had finally gotten tired of hitting a wall that was never going to move anyway.

In a split second, another Hawk ran over and shoved Edward roughly out of the way; but he wasn't going to just lie down and take it. He yanked the sword with him, away from its wielder.

He now held it… just the wrong end.

Exasperation tainted his eyes as he got back to his feet. Deep red seeped from his palm and made its path down his arm as held up the sword by its blade.

Even though the sentiment was powerful, he was living in a fairy tale if he thought he could fight off all the Hawks, which were ready to kill at the drop of a pen. The odds just weren't in our favor. Our? Was that what we were now, a team?

In a fraction of a second, I was on the floor again; I groaned as the floor met my cheek with a violent 'hello'.

The tables had turned; I could almost visibly see Edward lose what credibility he had with these people; for, he was on the ground with me, being held down.

He was finally getting a taste of his own medicine. I bet he had never been pinned down outside of practice or training. Also, what I knew about him, something no lie could cover up, was that he certainly didn't like losing. He squirmed, exerting energy blindly, trying to regain the upper hand. It was sad really, watching him struggle so feverishly, attempting to win a battle that had already been lost before it had started.

I turned my heads to the women, the very women who had dolled me up. I looked into their eyes, but I didn't see fear, remorse, or anger. What I saw in each one of their perfectly made up eyes, was intense disappointment. As if I had failed, like I was a child who couldn't learn even the simplest of equations.

I supposed in their eyes, I had failed; they live their lives in complete fearful silence. And for what? I now knew the answer. They had their hands protectively covering the frail bodies of their children. For they knew that they would be alone without them. They were much stronger, much braver than I had given them credit for; much better than I.

An awful groan and thud sounded in my ear for a few minutes as I pondered this; I guessed it was the sound of my pain and my heart beating. But as I turned around, I saw where the sound was really coming from.

Edward was being kicked, punched and having his head smashed on the wooden floor of the alter by the Hawks. Now that I knew where those terrible sounds had come from, I gasped; he was in so much pain. Blood was dripping down his forehead. I kept staring at him, trying to meet his gaze. But he never met mine. He was probably deliberately avoiding my gaze; as if he had failed as well, for he couldn't come up with a plan out of this. Improvisation doesn't work in situations such as this one.

There was a rushing in my ears, drowning out all other sounds; the voices around me were muffled and sounded slurred. I recognized the voice tone of the head Volturi member, ordering something, but I couldn't understand it.

I was roughly lifted up by the Hawks; one of them threw me over his shoulder in a careless move, and I had to look back at the faces of everyone as I was pitifully carried out, along with everyone else. Edward was more or less dragged, not carried; they probably thought he didn't deserve to be carried for his rebellion.

An extraordinary emotion flooded through me, but I couldn't decipher it; was it pride for destroying the one thing that the people here had taken solace in? Having them not able to mold me into what they saw as perfect? Or was it desperation; trying to trick me into thinking I'd done everything flawlessly and that it had to end this way? A sick desperate move to try to reassure myself into a false sense of achievement when in truth I did nothing of any value? That I was just a bug being easily smashed?

I couldn't figure it out, but I let it rest because I really didn't want to know. For once, I was fine with being kept in the dark. Perhaps I was afraid of the answer.

Alright you guys, the next chapter is IT. The next chapter is THE chapter!

Now the teaser may seem to make no sense now, but it will in the next chapter….

Review for the rest of the teaser

The End was by no means the end. It was only the beginning.

"That's awful." I groaned, feeling so defeated. No one really could beat the Volturi after all.

"Well, we won't live to see it." He breathed. "I guess that's good." I was about to go into a silent mourning session when he suddenly spoke up again.

"You know," he started. "My father is older than my mother." He finished tersely.

I wrinkled my nose in confusion. "That's nice." Why would he bring something up so randomly? "But that pertains to what's going on, how, exactly?"

He grunted, dissatisfied, as if he was frustrated I wasn't catching on to whatever he was trying to say.

"Just saying age is just a number." He shrugged, trying to seem nonchalant.