Hope all you readers have enjoyed this fic so far. I'll be posting a poll up on which character to do next later on, but that won't be for a while lol. Anyway, like I said before in the last chap I'd be posting a dramatica on a character at the beginning. And since I'm not so fond of Braig, he's first. Enjoy!
Braig- a snotty, lazy fuck, child molesting asshole who spends most his time flapping to an image of Xehanort or Ienzo. He became a guard/man-whore to the radiant garden castle for all the debts he failed to pay off (most likely all sexual assault or molestation charges) and basically has to do anything his pimp tells him to do. When off duty he's either raping Terra, Ventus, Arlene, Ienzo, Xion, Aqua or Xehanort; or brutally murdering the parents of hot sexy little blonde boys. (Lol Ventus) Many ppl say his scars and eye were taken by terra, when in reality during a round of sex with aqua; she accidently grabbed a hold of his face during climax instead of his back. (Ya, not as planned)
-I DON'T OWN ANYTHING BESIDES THE LITTLE RANT ABOVE THIS XD-
"Son of a bitch…I can't believe this is happening…" Ventus thought as he continued to try and move his frozen body.
First that prickly faced son of a whoremonger Eraqus tried killing him, then Vanitas confronted him that they were the same person and needed to become one again (rape) to summon a retarded looking keyblade, and now he couldn't even feel his body after being frozen and dropped off the edge of a cliff.
"What a bullshit way to die…The fucking bastard said he needed to capture me, yet fucking froze me to the point where my heart could stop…DAMNIT! Where's Aqua and Terra when I need them?"
"Finally, now no one will interrupt us…" Ventus struggled to move his head to the side, only to find Vanitas walking up to him, keyblade in hand.
"You b-bastard! Why the hell are you doing this to m-me!"
"Don't look at me! I didn't want this to happen, but it was the only way to keep you from running away and safe," Vanitas laughed now as he gazed down at the frozen boy.
"How is me trying to beat the living shit out of you and your master with my friends running away? And in case you haven't fucking noticed, your child molesting son of a bitch of a master froze me like a Popsicle and threw me off a cliff! Is that your definition of safe!"
"Geez relax…Once we become one again, everything will be fine."
"So you can get your keyblade and unlock the ways to other worlds and start a war? You're just making things worse!"
Vanitas immediately jumped on top of the boy and straddled his frozen armored hips. "Na, I rather not get killed by that mouse and your sister. I just want to make sure you never leave my side again that's all."
"You've been stalking and trying to kill me since day one! Why would I ever want to be with you?"
"Because you'd be better off with me then that pussy Terra! And besides…"
"W-what?"
Vanitas couldn't help but smirk. "Let's just say he'll be hitting puberty fast once Xehanort takes care of him." (RAPE!)
"W-what do you mean?" (X-treme makeover bitch!)
Vanitas tried his best not to laugh. "Just trust me, you won't recognize him when you see him again," he leaned down and grasped both the arms of the frozen boy, causing him to cry out in pain.
"Let go man, that hurts!"
"That's what he should be saying when I'm halfway done with him."
"I barely even touched you. Don't tell me Terra's pussy-pussness rubbed off on you! I won't allow it!"
"SHUT UP AND GET THE HELL OFF ME! I think I broke my arm from that fall and for some reason…I can't feel anything below my waist."
Vanitas quickly jumped off him. "What do you mean you can't feel anything?"
"I mean I can't feel my legs. I don't know what level blizzard spell Xehanort used but besides my legs…I think my balls and dick are about to fall off."
Slight dread coursed through Vanitas now. "That's not good…Tell me if you feel this," he ordered and raised his keyblade above his head.
"NO! WAI-"
SLAM!
Ventus squeezed his eyes shut the moment the blade came down, expecting an award of mind blowing pain to his leg, but surprisingly, no pain came. He cracked open an eye to find the blade end located…Right on his armored crotch. (Weak!)
"Did you feel that?"
"N-no…Oh man, what if I have to have my legs caught off? Or worse…Not be able to use the bathroom anymore! OH GOD WHY!"
"Oh god why indeed! I can't take over his body if his legs don't work. Or worse…How the hell am I going to get him to scream my name in ecstasy if I can't screw him? Blowjobs don't cut it!" (I'm sure Lea wouldn't care either way.)
"Easy! I've got this covered!" Vanitas crouched down next to him and called forth a fira spell which consumed one of his hands.
"Get away from me! If I wanted to be roasted like a fucking Christmas goose I would have committed suicide in the castle furnace back home."
"Shut up, I'm going to thaw you out. Or would you rather sit here and die knowing that you most likely lost your dick to an old bastard's magic?" (ZING!)
Ventus didn't have time to answer when red flames suddenly consumed his body. Instead of the incineration he was expecting, he got nothing but the pleasant warmth his body so desperately wanted, causing him to moan while Vanitas grinned.
The fire was called off moments later. "Try to move your legs now."
There was a grunt of displeasure, but the blonde complied and managed to move them both slightly. Both boys sighed with relief now, "I still can't really feel anything…"
"Then allow me!" Vanitas called off his weapon to lift the boy off the ground bridal style.
"Put me down! I want nothing to do with you or your master's plans, just leave me be!"
"I just saved your ass from some serious frost bite and you still hate me? What the hell's your problem?"
"I have to find Terra! Plus you're trying to start another war for evil reasons!"
"Well fuck Terra and the war. I admit I was going to make us one again so we could summon the X-blade, but then I realized something…"
"Err…What?"
"If we become one, how the hell am I supposed to have my way with you? It would be like me masturbating in front of a bunch on unversed with no feeling at all; As well as using my own tears as lubricate since I couldn't have you sucking on my fingers for lube."
"Wow, you must be one pathetically lonely guy."
"Shut up…" The dark boy growled now and began walking away from the battle field.
"H-hey, where are you taking me!"
"Well seeing that we're pretty much all fucked anyway due to the bullshit ending square enix made for this game, I was thinking we go somewhere more suitable so we could spend some well-deserved "quality" time together." (Surprise butt-secks)
"NO! I have to find Terra and…Oh shit, AQUA! I forgot all about her! I have to go save her from Braig!"
Vanitas continued to walk on. "Na, you won't have to worry about her. I told Braig he could do whatever he wanted to do but kill her."
"HOW COULD YOU TRUST A MAN LIKE THAT WITH A TEENAGE GIRL! Do you have any clue what that sick bastard has done!"
"Pfft, no duh. He's lived with us long enough to know he has a thing for kids, since he got banned from staying at the castle. Oh and believe it or not, has a HUGE collection of pictures of Ienzo and Xehanort."
"B-but Aqua will-"
"Be fine unless I say otherwise. Now let's get out of here before Master Xehanort finds out." (LIAR!) He declared and took off in a run while the blonde began to shout and try to break free of the dark boy's hold.
Meanwhile…
"GET THE HELL AWAY FROM ME!" Aqua shouted as she dodged a swarm of bullets.
Braig laughed as he continued shooting at the blue-haired brunette, "COME BACK BABE! I'm not gonna hurt ya!"
"After being shot over twenty times with those guns, ya right."She groaned and continued to run behind some large rocks. "I just hope Ventus is okay…I can't let this bastard hurt him!"
An explosion of rocks behind her caused to lurch forward, landing hard on her side as she cried out in pain. As she sat up, she turned her around to find Braig walking up to her, an evil grin on his face as he pointed a gun at her. (Rape face!)
"Finally got you where I want you babe…" He took a step closer while she slid back a little. "You've been a real pain in the ass."
"I wouldn't be such a pain in the ass if you would just leave Ventus alone!" She shouted and stood up now.
"C'mon babe, the kid is gonna be fine. Old Xehanort and fishbowl head need him alive…And they left me in charge of taking care of you. But I gotta say your waaaay hotter than any of the whores I've met."
"Excuse me?" Aqua's mouth dropped open as she demanded an answer.
"What I'm just saying," Braig snickered before pulling out a small piece of paper from his pocket. "Says here you're a total slut, you get off on playing with your little best friends ding-dongs…"
Aqua grit her teeth as one of her brows began to twitch in anger.
"Oh, and apparently your own master sterilized you in your sleep so you wouldn't end up having Terra's bastard chi-"
SLAM!
"OW! WHAT THE FUCK!" Braig fell to the ground, gripping his knee in agony as Aqua stood before him in utter rage. "WHO told you that?"
Aqua slammed her keyblade against his other knee, and then his stomach while he again cried out in pain. "Shit lady, your ex-boyfriend already ripped out of one my eyes. I don't need to be vomiting up one of my kidneys next!"
"Then tell me who!" She shouted again and continued to beat him with her weapon, not even taking notice to an all too familiar mouse running up to her.
"Okay okay! It was Vanitas! He didn't like the way you kept on hugging and spending time with Ventus that he posted all kinds of dirt about you being a slut and crap all over the walls of Radiant Garden after you left. Oh, and that includes with the things I said before and that you have a big lesbian crush on Maleficent." (lmao)
"Hey Aqua, do you need help beating this guys-"
"SHUT UP!" The girl shouted enraged and swung her keyblade at the voice behind here, only to be rewarded with a loud gashing sound and a thud to the ground. Both turned their attention to the sounds and gasped at the sight of Mickey's body falling to the ground while his head rolled off a good distance away. (The king is dead! *cheers*)
"Holy fucking sweet babe! You didn't have to kill him!"
Aqua immediately dropped her keyblade and began to have a panic attack. "Oh god…oh no, oh no, oh no…I'm so fucking dead, I didn't mean to do it!"
Braig, who had snuck an elixir, got up and stood beside her, looking down at the bloody mess of what was left of King Mickey. "Shit babe, I can only imagine the look on Walt Disney's face if he was alive to see this; fucking priceless," he began to laugh before being elbowed in the side.
"This isn't funny you asshole! Son of a bitch I'm so fucked, they're going to lock me up for good once people find out what I did."
"Well maybe your friends, but if the Disney villains find out what you did they'll look up to you like a god damn hero babe, so I guess that's a good thing right?"
"No its not! This wasn't supposed to happen just…Shit, why did it have to be his whole head! What the fuck are we going to do with the body!"
Braig licked his lips for a moment before grinning. "I know what we can do to the body." He began to rub his hands together deep in thought. (Insert naughty music here XD)
This time she elbowed him in the gut. "You sick son of a bitch, how the hell could you even think about doing something like "that" to his body; and without a head too!"
"This isn't the first time I've done something like this…"
"What!"
"What?" Braig quickly followed after. "I was thinking we could just throw the body over the cliff and blame Vanitas or Xehanort for it. I used to do it all the time before people began figuring out my hiding places."
Ignoring his words, she covered her face with both hands and began to sob while muttering things about how she should just blow her brains out now and save everyone some time, causing the older man to roll his eyes and sigh. He walked over to the king's decapitated body and quickly grabbed it by the tail before teleporting over by his head and kicking it over a nearby cliff.
"C'mon babe, quit crying over something like this. What's done is done alright?" he laughed before tossing the body over the cliff. "But I have to say though, for a girl you're age your pretty fucking crazy…I kind of like that."
Aqua removed her hands from her face to glare at him. "I didn't do this on purpose you bastard; you think this is fucking funny? There's no way I can show my face to my friends once they found out what I did!"
Braig threw an arm over her shoulders. "Listen, if you play it cool they won't find out all right? Besides, Vanitas or Xehanort are most likely going to be blamed anyway." He replied before removing his bandana to wipe her tears away.
"Okay…I hope your right."
"OH GOD! HE'S DEAD! WHO COULD HAVE DONE SOMETHING AS HORRIBLE AS THIS!"
"Can I borrow one of your guns for a minute?" Aqua groaned in utter depression now. (Suicide!)
"THIS PLACE IS GOING TO HELL AND BACK! WHY DID HE HAVE TO DIE LIKE THIS!"
"No, you sit tight, I've got this." Braig let her go walked over to the edge of the cliff, only to find Terra who was looking more like Xehanort now poking at the dead body with his keyblade.
"Hey asshole!"
Terra looked up. "What the hell do you want? Did you do this?"
"And what if I did? It's not like it's any of your business anyway."
"DID YOU DO THIS!"
"Yeah, but with the help of your crazy girlfriend, who I might add has an amazing rack."
"Braig, what the hell are you doing!" Aqua shouted before punching him.
"You're lying! Aqua would never do such a thing and besides, why the hell would she be with when she can be with me? I'm not the one going around molesting underage children."
Braig laughed again. "I'd hate to say this kid but your worse than that mother fucker Riku. (Truth!) And at least I don't look like a future pedophile."
"YOU ARE A PEDOPHILE YOU DUMBASS!"
"Yeah, but with your new appearance you're bound to makeany ten-year old loose his virginity with just one stare at you!"
"What the hell is that supposed to mean!"
Braig immediately pulled out a small mirror from his pocket and tossed it down to the changing boy. "Might want to take a look at yourself now kid, no chick wants to be humping a nightmare like you!"
Terra caught the mirror and brought it up to his face in suspicion, only to drop the mirror second later with his eyes going wide.
"OH MY GOD! MY FACE! WHAT HAPPENED TO MY PERFECT SKIN! HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO FUCK VENTUS LOOKING LIKE THIS!"
While Terra continued shouting nonsense, Braig began laughing again before turning his attention to Aqua, who was on the ground sulking with her head down.
He walked up and knelt beside her. "Why are you upset? You should be laughing and pointing with me at this freak now."
"Terra's going to transform into a man that sounds like he's having an orgasm every time he speaks isn't he?" (Spoiler.)
"Yep."
"I'm going to suffer in the realm of darkness and get my ass beat by a bunch of Disney freaks for killing the king aren't eye?"
"I'd have to say yes on that on."
"Ventus is most likely going to be raped and have his heart sealed inside the body of a six-year old boy after all this crazy shit is over with too right?" (spoiler…Wait what? XD)
"Bingo babe!" Braig pulled her up to stand.
"Do you think it might be possible to get Maleficent to let me stay with her for a while?"
"Wouldn't see why not, Why her place?"
"Because after this game ends, I just want a drink and a good fuck; And by good fuck I mean I don't want to be able to walk straight until the next kingdom hearts game comes out."
The bulge in Braig's pants stood up instantly. (giggity!) "Well what the fuck are we waiting for babe? A sexy party at the hundred year old virgin's castle it is!" He quickly grabbed her arm and the two skipped off into the dusty sunset. (What should have been Aqua's ending. XD)
Back to Ventus…
"Can you put me down now; I'm surprised we didn't get sucked into any of those dark vortexes. (Those things were a pain in the ass -_- .)
"Darkness doesn't fuck with other dark beings. Well…Except Terra, darkness hates pussies too." Vanitas thought for a moment before setting the blonde boy down on a rocky ledge. The two were now standing before a grand view of the waste land, a vast number of keyblades scattered around below like an ocean. Making the sight look more ancient then it already was.
"Wow…This is amazing..." Ventus gapped before sitting down, letting his feet dangle over the ledge.
"I know right? This was my favorite place to just sit and think before all this crap happened." Vanitas replied before sitting down beside him."
"Didn't think psychopaths like you were capable of sitting and thinking things through."
Vanitas pouted, "I'm not a psychopath. Perverted yes, Stalker no shit, but a psychopathic rapist, definite no. If was that bad I would have burned you to a crisp when I thawed you out, peeled your skin off and made it into a sweater for my master. Or maybe just possess you and make you wave your dong to people in Disney town."
Ventus immediately scooted over. "Okay, that's a little too much dude." (Lol)
"Yes, I know. But I'm pure darkness, so shit like that happens all the time," Vanitas grinned and scooted closer to the blonde, wrapping an arm around him to stop his attempts of getting away from him. "Soooo, seeing that we're all screwed in some way…What do you say we have a little screw fest of our own while there's still time huh?"
Ventus gave him a nervous look. "Um no thanks, I'm kind of tired and still can't feel my legs."
"Nothing wrong with that babe, I can take care of everything for you," He quickly began removing pieces of the blonde's armor.
"No stop, Can't I enjoy my last moment of freedom without being sexually assaulted by a freak in a mask!" Ventus struggled and pushed Vanitas away.
Vanitas sighed in defeat but didn't let the boy go. "Fine you little brat, but seriously, be thankful your stuck with me rather than Braig."
Ventus sighed with relief before gently snuggling his face in the dark boy's neck, "Thanks…"
Vanitas tried his best not to growl, "You're just tempting me now kid, you better come up with something to do before I lose my fucking mind all over your chest and face." (Sounds tasty. ;D)
"I don't know! What do you usually do besides sex and playing with yourself?"
"Think about you…"
Ventus rolled his eyes. "There must be something else besides that. God, I might as well throw myself off the cliff right now."
Vanitas thought for a moment before snapping his fingers and letting the boy go. "I just got the perfect idea!"
"Really, what is it?"
Vanitas raised both his hands in the air, summoning two large dark bubbles. "Master Ansem said this is the best thing to give to underage kids when you're bored, sexually frustrated, and want to feel sexy." Two large glass bottles fell in his hands as the darkness vanished.
"Vodka!"
Less than a mile away…
"I should have just stayed home…Why did I let that old bastard talk me in to giving myself to darkness?" Terra sobbed as he continued walking, not even paying attention to where he was going.
"Sixteen and already growing white hair, God I'm such a fucking idiot! What am I going to tell Aqua and Ventus? There's no way they'll take me back…I know! Once my skin turns completely tan (spoiler) and I start having wet dreams of a blue-haired werewolf (spoiler), I'll create a badass terrorist group and create havoc in all the worlds! Pure genius!"
Terra laughed evilly as he continued walking, only to fall flat on his ass when he bumped into something rather hard.
'What the hell!"
"I suggest you watch where you're going boy." Terra looked up to find an old man with a ponytail in a white lab coat sneering down at him. (Hojo rules!)
"What the hell are you doing a place like this old man?" Terra asked and quickly sat up.
"Well I was looking for my son…But I think you might be a little more interesting than him right now."
"KEEP HIM AWAY FROM ME!" A voice out of nowhere shouted.
"Pure genius you say? You think you're a genius?"
Terra crossed his arms, "Of course I am! Nothing can go wrong for what I'm going to do in the future!" (He jinxed it!)
"Oh really? Okay then so called genius…Why did the chicken cross the road?"
"Huh?"
"Why did the chicken cross the road?"
"Hm…?"
"To die in the name of science!"
"Uh…Okay, what does that have to do-
Hojo quickly pulled out a chainsaw and started it, Causing Terra's eyes to widen and quickly bolt off in a random direction.
"GET BACK HERE!" The scientist shouted and quickly chased after him.
(Terra fails, end of story!)
OoOoOoOoOoOoOo
"And t-then he told me to spread my legs and sqqquuuueeeeeaaaaaal like a pig! It was awful!"
"That must have been sheeeet!"
Vanitas, who was no longer wearing his mask, was sobbing on Ventus's shoulder while the blonde did his best not to fall backwards. The empty bottles of vodka lay forgotten behind them.
"S-since then, he made me wear this mask…" Vanitas picked up his mask off the ground and began shaking. "And like you said, I only have the face a mother could love-OH MY GOD! I DON'T HAVE A MOTHER!"
"I don't have one either…And I didn't mean what I said, I think you have a pretty face!"
Vanitas wiped his tears away, "You think so?"
Ventus grabbed a hold of Vanitas's face. "I know soooo…You're the prettiest girl I've ever seen, I could stare at you all day!"
"Heeeeeey, if we're going to get married you're going to be the woman a-and I'll treat you like a princess." Vanitas pointed a finger at his nose."
"Oh my god, we should- do you know what we should do?" Ventus wrapped an arm around Vanitas's head. "We should just go! Like go somewhere big with giant hamsters-OH! And lots and lots of ice cream."
"Noooo! Let's go to a big castle and dance like that bitch Cinderella. We c-couldz-I could wear a suit and I'll buy you a pretty dress and we could dance on top of the castle until we fall off together!"
Ventus began laughing. "Then bitch slap that bitch for- those are my glass slippers BITCH!"
It was Vanitas turn to laugh. "I'll hit her," he grabbed one of Ventus's hands and began licking it. "Don't want you to ruin your hands-Your wedding ring is going to go heeeeeereee!" He licked his ring finger.
"I love you vontox!"
"It's Vanitas."
"Vartus?"
"Vanitas!"
"Vagina?"
"VANITAS!"
"Vanny?"
"Close enough!" Vanitas pushed the boy down and forced his tongue in the blonde's mouth, causing him to moan and wrap his arms around the dark boy. As the two continued to make out in a drunken frenzy, a small ball of light gently began to circle them, growing brighter as it got closer to the couple.
The couple broke apart and squinted at the bright light. "The sun is mad!"
The ball of light stopped moving, its brightness beginning to grow dimmer now. "Hello you two!"
Ventus pointed at the ball. "Tinker bell?"
"Boys, you must follow the sphere of light to great beyond! There you two will have many quests of love, friendship, and happiness that await you, do you accept this offer?" (Don't go towards the light!)
Ventus and Vanitas jumped in excitement and linked arms, "WE DO! ADVENTURE!"
"Then follow me!" The sphere of light floated away while the boys began chasing after it.
OoOoOooOoOoOoOoOoOo
(Reality)
"Ventus! Please wake up! I'm here now!" Aqua shouted as she tried shaking the non-moving/breathing boy awake.
"It won't do you any good, I'm afraid his heart is gone for now. Yen cid sighed while shaking his head.
"Man, who would have thought he would have been stupid enough to jump off a cliff with thousands of sharp blades sticking out at the bottom." Braig sighed while trying to calm a very upset aqua down. A beaten up Eraqus and tall white-haired man also present and crying. (Xemnas)
"Teenagers, how stupid can they get!"
"Is this a bad time saying that Hojo might have raped Terra?"
"What was the time of death?" Braig asked.
"I don't know, four hours ago?"
"Who cares about the boy! What about King Mickey!" Donald and Goofy demanded.
Eraqus and Xemnas immediately grabbed onto each other, sobbing louder about the poor boy, it being their fault, and something about never being able to make another. (Lol wut?)
END…?
Okay, I think the ending was a little weird but I don't care. I'm still loling at this. If anyone doesn't get the light joke I gave a clear hint at the top and if you still don't get it…Well then I hope you go running towards the light soon. Anyway, hope people enjoyed the fic and I'll put the poll up soon. Reviews would be nice if possible please!