Hello again. Welcome to Chappie 3. BTW, I don't own anything. Just in case you haven't noticed.

A Teenager's Guide to Living with Pirates

Chapter 3

3rd person

Jack awoke to somebody's boot prodding him. "I think he's dead." The voice was familiar, but somehow the owner was not important enough to remember. "Let's celebrate." Oh, now it's familiar. It's someone that wants him dead. The issue here is that so many people want him dead that Captain Jack Sparrow doesn't make a point of remembering them all.

"He's not dead." Ah, a female voice. Well, that canceled out a lot of enemies, mostly pirates who wouldn't be caught near a woman. Bad luck, you know. However, they could be on land… "Welcome back to the realm of the conscious, Jack."

He opened his eyes. Two women gasped and fell to the ground. He grinned, and then looked up. Hovering above him, inches from his face, was the girl trying to wake him. He gasped. Personal space, and all. In a few seconds, Jack spoke. "Nice to be back. Would you, by any chance at all," He was sitting up against the wall, trying to get as much space between him and these strange, invasive people. "happen to be the scroungey gits who took me out in the first place?"

The girl shook her head and stood up. As Jack stood up, quite relieved he wouldn't meet those things anytime soon, he looked around the room. It was bright purple. The ceiling was white… and covered with… him?

He looked at the girl who had woken him, back at the ceiling, mouth opening and closing like a fish, and back at her until he could speak. "Why am I on your ceiling?"

He watched her look up, and heard her mutter, "Damn…" She spoke, "Um, those are posters… sort of like paintings, I guess." She looked unsure of herself, wringing her hands and sneaking glances at Commodore Norrington's sheathed sword.

"Let's wake Barbossa."

"May I?" Jack asked pleasantly. She nodded, eyeing him warily.

"HECTOR!" Jack walked over to his former first mate and sighed. "Never was a light sleeper," He spoke, partly to himself, partly to the people behind him, "but a well placed kick always did the trick…"

"AAAAAAHHHHH!" Barbossa screamed, than realized it was Jack who woke him. "Ten years, but nothing's changed about you, Jack."

"Ah, but eleven and a half years, mate. You've been dead for eighteen months."

"Yes, but they brought me back."

"I suppose."

Meanwhile, Norrington was attempting to wake Anamaria. "Um, excuse me miss. Wake up?" He prodded her arm, and the moment he touched it, something fast and hard whacked him in the face, and he jumped away. He looked over at her, and realized that hard thing was her backhand.

"I'm awake, you idiot."

In another area of the room, Leah attempted to wake Will. "Will?" she asked while shaking him. "Will?"

"You can poke and prod him all you want, the boy is never going to wake up." It was clearly Jack who was telling her this, he said it the same way he said a line about Poochie in the first movie.

"Well excuse me if I don't know how to properly wake him. Why won't he wake up, anyway? Everyone else is just fine." Leah said.

Sam spoke up from behind her, "Well, do you always get back up bright an early every morning?"

Jack pushed Leah aside, looked down at Will, and kicked him in the side. Hard. As in, Leah was surprised she didn't hear a rib crack or something.

"OW!" Will jumped up off the floor, clutching his side and a little dizzy. "What was that for?!"

"For not waking up when Miss…" He turned to Leah, "Apologies, didn't quite catch your name."

"Leah." Leah told Jack.

"When Miss Leah told you to."

Will opened his mouth to give a witty comeback, but then closed it when he couldn't think of one. He looked around the room, eyes wide, and settled for a different question. "Where are we?"

"Virginia." Leah said.

"You should fit right in." Jack told Will. Will rolled his eyes. Leah giggled.

"Virginia…" Will said, as if trying the word out. "Is that near Port Royal?"

Both Will and Jack looked to Leah, and, smiling, she shook her head.

"Here." She said, "Let me explain some things."

REVIEW! And, a poll: What should Jack be doing while Leah explains the ins and outs of our modern world?

A: Listening diligently but asking strange questions.

B: Barely restraining himself from shooting the highly annoying monkey.

C: Not listening whatsoever, because he is completely absorbed with the swivel chair he is seated in.

D: Annoying Will and Norrington, who are on his left and right

E: Anything else, just give the word.