Not Alone
B312
0753 Hours, September 3, 2552, Two Days after Wide Spread Planetary Glassing
Spartan B-312 awoke the moment his ears registered a strange sound. Slowly, the Spartan Lieutenant rose up from his position on the cave floor. His sense of smell was assaulted once again by the putrid stench of the unnaturally large bull Guta. His body flinched the barest of millimeters as he stretched every part of his upper body. The three and a half dozen wounds he had received, only in the last four days as well, all varied in the amount of pain they caused the twenty four year old Spartan.
His multiple injuries ranged from minor annoyances, such as bruises, to recently stitched wounds all the way up to his still tender shoulder, to several second degree plasma burns. Leo fought back the urge to gingerly rub his most recent prominent scar. He turned his gaze to stare first at the peeled off section of his gray body suit. Once again, he found it hard to believe that the stitching had been done to near surgeon standards. Leo looked at the reasonably painful looking scar, courtesy of a mistakenly assumed dead Brute.
In a slow and deliberate motion, Leo tilted his head slightly upward by several centimeters. His eyes focused on the pair of civilians still sleeping just several feet from him. Leo saw that during the night Rozsa had snuggled her way closer to Sara, and the young woman had in turn wrapped her arms protectively around the eight year old child's waist. The Spartan felt slightly uncomfortable as he watched the pair sleep peacefully. Leo felt as though he did not belong anywhere near them, that this was something he was never meant to witness.
That was what the logical part of his mind, the Spartan part, told him. But there was also a noticeable part of him that strangely and desperately wished he could have been in Rozsa's position. A sleeping child, blissfully unaware of the horrors of real life while sleeping. Wrapped in the arms of another person who cared for and wanted to protect him.
With a surprisingly high amount of willpower, Leo pushed his mind away from such thoughts. Slowly, the Spartan found his way to his feet before turning to walk in the direction of his armor. He kept his movements silent so not to awaken his visibly worn companions. Leo knew he could never hold them to the standards reserved for fellow Spartans; they couldn't go days without rest on any number of injuries like he could, or wake up as early as he had.
His eyes flickered to his left, scanning the distance outside their temporary shelter. The sound of a light but steady rain fall reached his ears. In addition to that, the Spartan could see that dawn would be several hours away for their part of Reach. Leo would have sighed in mild frustration, if he were anything but a Spartan. He knew that despite the gloomy and depressing look, the rain was not without its benefits.
Leo stopped several feet from the orderly placed pieces of his armor. He was reminded of what he had told Sara earlier the other day when she had offered him water. If they were going to survive the next few days, and he would make sure they at least would, Leo knew they would have to maintain a ready amount of fresh water. He turned to look at what they had to serve as containers. Wherever Sara and Rozsa had been before meeting him yesterday, he wondered if it also had all the equipment they seemed to have picked up.
Sara had brought six military issue canteens, several of which appeared to be covered by small traces of dried human blood. That brought several questions to forefront of his mind, but as they had no relevancy to their current situation he filled them away to the back of his mind. In addition to the canteens the Reach native had brought two bags of MREs and four medical packs. Enough to last a pair of civilians for a little over two weeks, if rationed carefully.
Leo was slightly curious as to what the two of them had planned, but he would not ask them. Regardless of what their plans had been, they had been irreversibly changed the moment he met them. After uncapping the canteens the Spartan took them outside and placed them against the cave rock, where they would hopefully be filled with rain water when the time came to leave.
As soon as the rain began to pick up once again, he was already standing before his armor components. Typically, he would have been assisted by a team of security certified technicians. Under those conditions it would have taken nearly ten minutes to fully equip his MJOLNIR Power Armor. However, all Spartans did know how to equip the armor themselves; it just took anywhere from twenty five to thirty minutes depending on the condition of the armor in question.
As he was placing the armor plates over his body, his mind began to wander back to his earlier thoughts. After the Beta Company augmentations he had been told that there were some….minor side effects that soon began to affect several of the new Spartan-III class. Leo was one such Spartan. Somewhere on a chemical and cellular as well, areas of his brain had been affected in slightly abnormal ways. While humanity had advanced significantly since leaving Earth hundreds of years ago, there were still hundreds of mysteries the human mind still held.
For the most part these side effects were actually beneficial. While he never received the full details, Lieutenant Commander Ambrose had informed him personally the speed at which his mind processed and reacted to information was nearly as high as a 5th generation "Dumb AI", and would make him the best pilot the UNSC would ever see, a fact that he himself had proven many times over the years. While never officially reported, Leo had broken every pilot record in the files aside from flight time.
There were the negative effects as well however: such as severe migraines, and a near impossibility to remain mentally still. As a result of this Leo was only able to remain clear headed under the stress of battle. Therefore in order to cope, he had forced himself to be able to create mental walls which held any new information he learned. Outside of battle he allowed his mind to come back to these mental containers, but he still felt that the benefits sometimes did not measure up to the negatives.
It was because of this, that he once again thought of what he had felt while watching Rozsa and Sara. And what it meant. For the most part, both the Spartan-II and III classes had no knowledge of life outside the UNSC, or the battlefield. They knew what civilians would do on a peaceful day, what they would do with families, and holidays. Unfortunately that was what they learned from what normal soldiers spoke about, not from their own experiences. Aside from his single experience with those children eleven years ago, Leo had no idea what civilians really were like or what they felt was normal. What being human meantand felt like.
The Spartan Lieutenant realized that next to Rozsa, he was practically a toddler when it came to understanding the non-war actions of humans. Mentally he thumped himself, and for the briefest of instances cursed being a Spartan. What reason did he have to even have anything to do with her and Sara? Especially when the word "human" became as separated from himself as the Covenant were. As a Spartan humans may as well have been a different species of non-hostile aliens, for the most part at least.
As he sealed his helmet over his armor, the Spartan realized that he had been thinking on that until he had equipped his armor. And he still had no real answer, or even a question to have an answer for. Perhaps this was the reason Spartans were distant from other humans. Being raised to be a Super-Soldier made thinking about the way of life for normal humans too complicated. Leo came to the revelation that for the first time since joining the Spartan-III program, he wanted to experience that life more than he wanted to be fighting the Covenant.
His entire body froze the moment that thought came to the front of his mind. Why had even thought of it? Could a Spartan, a soldier bred for war and given the purpose of defending humanity, even be capable of such a life? Would he be given the chance at all? None were likely, especially with Reach gone and Earth the Covenant Armada's next target.
Enough! the Spartan part of his mind yelled out at him. These questions and doubts are a sign of depression. As a Spartan, my duty comes first before any thoughts. Right now that means keeping Rozsa and Sara safe and I can't do that while I'm felling like this. Take control Spartan, remember Noble.
Leo began to take several long deep breaths, trying to control his emotions once again. His logical side was right: he was a Spartan and their duty always came first. The Spartan Lieutenant knew that he would likely not survive the war, even if humanity somehow did win. He shouldn't have even been thinking that far ahead. Leo was more likely to still be alive in a week, than he was to still be alive in a year.
Turning to face the still sleeping pair, his eyes caught Rozsa small form trembling slightly. Belaying the heavy weight of the armor, Leo quietly walked to stand in front of the eight year old girl's face. He saw the girl biting her lower lip, sweat appearing on her forehead. Pressing a gloved hand lightly to her face, his armor systems register a change in temperature in the girl. Rozsa's body temperature was two degrees above what it should be for a child. If she came down with an illness, there were no hospitals or medical supplies to treat her.
Leo managed to stop a sense of fear from rising in his chest. Why did that matter so much to him? Her well being was important to him, yes, and he would die in an instant to keep her safe. And yet, why in the name of God was he afraid of losing her? Was it because it would feel similar to losing Noble? Or had she somehow affected him to such a degree in a short time without his knowing?
He was sure of one thing. He'd allowed his emotions to rise to the surface for the barest of time, and it was enough that it had changed him. The question was, would it be a good or bad change?
"Hmm, I wonder," Leo said quietly to himself, the helmet's voice filter not registering his quiet tone. "When did I start to become a philosopher?"
The Spartan reached for the prototype equipment located on his lower back. The device had been damaged when a Zealot had grabbed Leo from the back, and then threw him in the direction of a Hunter. He'd struck the twelve foot tall monster's shield just as it was about to attack Emile. The heat it produced the moment it was damaged was nearly the same as atmospheric reentry had been, apparently hot enough that the Hunter's shield melted slightly. Emile had taken advantage of the moment and jumped onto the alien's back holding onto a pair of spikes while firing his shot gun into its vulnerable orange "flesh".
Emile had saved Leo's life that day and never thought much of it. And yet when it was his life in danger, Leo's turn to save his brother Spartan, the Hyper Lethal Vector had failed to return the favor.
Shaking his head slightly the Spartan disconnected the equipment. The moment it had been damaged his armor had ceased to send any further power and automatically shut it off. Yet the now unusable Hologram projector still had several hours worth of power to sustain itself while activated.
Leo set down the experimental equipment a foot away from Rozsa, careful to set it down where the girl would not be able to touch it in her sleep. Then he re-activated it and waited several short seconds. Soon a yellow light covered several short inches of the cave floor, the light becoming slightly fainter in the seconds that followed. His armor detected the increase in temperature immediately.
While it had been undamaged it had never released any amount of heat, yet when damaged it did. He had set it on a low level setting in order to protect the girls. Once damaged the projector released a small amount of radiation, and if it were at a higher level the heat output would cause more damage. They two were in enough danger already; Leo refused add anymore to their lives.
He returned his sight back towards the eight year old girl. Leo stayed in front of her, his armored knees pressing against the cold floor. The girl's shaking soon slowed down and stopped entirely several minutes later. Smiling slightly the Spartan slowly stood up once again, content in the knowledge that he had a hand in keeping Rozsa comfortable.
He felt a weak grip on his gloved left hand.
"Don't go." came the drowsy voice of the same girl. Leo's heart fell as he heard the obvious trace of utter terror in Rozsa's voice. An emotion he had unintentionally placed in her himself. Ironic that while he could ease the fear in battle hardened troopers by joining them in battle, and yet not a little girl whom he had tried to take care of. Leo felt his eyes wince slightly. "You can't leave us Mister Spartan, you can't," Rozsa said, this time sounding as though on the verge of tears.
"I won't," he told the girl quietly. Leo gently shrugged off Rozsa's small hand and turned to half crouch in front of the girl. The Spartan Lieutenant instantly took note of the visible tear stains on her face, partially hidden by raven haired locks. Her brown eyes clearly projected the fear she was feeling. Fear he had caused.
"Then why did you put that armor on? Why were you looking at the outside?" she asked him in a near hysterical tone. To his surprise Sara hadn't awoken; Rozsa was not speaking quietly at all.
"Because-" his response was quickly interrupted.
"Was it my fault? Because I fell asleep and didn't find the cave with you?" Leo was amazed she could even think he was leaving because of her. The Spartan was staying with them for her sake, why blame herself?
"No. Its not your fault. You haven't done anything Rozsa, don't blame yourself," he told her in as reassuring a tone as he could muster. This was very unfamiliar territory now. Leo was used to being with confident men and women surrounding him. He was used to letting others deal with those who felt utter despair. The Spartan had never once in his life found himself in this situation. Trying to calm a person down, certainly never a child. That had been Jorge's specialty.
Brown eyes did not look reassured in the slightest. Reddened eyes still let tears continue to run down pale white cheeks. Leo could see that he was failing at something yet again. Some part of him told him that he would find himself doing that for the rest of his life, no matter how long or short.
Slowly, and with no small amount of nervousness, Leo moved a hand towards the eight year old child's face. He took notice that her eyes looked confused, and then surprised as he gently removed the black hair covering her face. The Spartan then placed finger to her cheek and move it over her tears, getting rid of them even more gently.
"You don't have to cry, I'm not worth anyone shedding a single tear for, Rozsa," Leo told her in a whisper. As he moved his hand back from her face Rozsa began to move out of Sara's arms. The part of him that paid attention to even the slightest of details thought that the woman's arms were removed far to easily. Leo watched as Rozsa tried to stand quickly, only to nearly fall from the remnants of sleep that had yet to fully leave her body. "Rozsa don't stand up. Right now you should be getting as much sleep as possible," he ordered the girl.
To his utter shock the black-haired child took two steps forward and then wrapped her short arms as far around his body as she could. He could tell she was holding him as tightly as she possibly could, as though still afraid that he would leave her.
"You didn't say no. Please don't go," she whimpered quietly as she began to sob into the chest plate. Awkwardly, Leo moved to pull the girl closer to his chest in an unpracticed hug. Absentmindedly he found that this felt almost natural, similar to the instincts he felt while fighting. Perhaps this was a normal human reaction towards children. Leo vaguely remembered a man and woman, their faces barely noticeable, do the same for him. His parents?
"I promise," he said to her quietly, resting her head below his helmet. Leo stroked her back slowly, allowing her to stop him if he was doing something wrong. Rozsa's response was quite the opposite actually; the little girl was trying to bury herself deeper into his body. He was a complete stranger to her; she had only seen his face once, and only known him for a little under twenty four hours. Yet she was clinging to him as an ocean sailor would a life float.
"Thank you, Leo."
And then he was once again shocked by a child, his entire body locking up. "What did you say?" he asked her in an incredulous tone. How the hell had she known his name?
"Leo. That your name right, or was I wrong again?" she replied before pulling her head back to stare into the black visor, a look of disappointment and annoyance in her eyes. Briefly he wondered if she had a split-personality disorder; that seemed to be the only explanation for her quick change of attitude. "Why did you stop, Mister Spartan?"
"No….No. That is my name. It's just..." he found himself opening and closing his mouth, trying to find the right words. "How do you know? I never told you."
A look of hurt crossed Rozsa's innocent face. "But you told Sara," she answered him in a confused and slightly hurt voice. "You were arguing, I woke up. I thought my mommy and uncle were fighting again, that they didn't leave me." Leo noticed that she was trying to fight back more tears. "Before you went to sleep you said your name was Leo. Why you tell her who you are when you were yelling, but not me? That makes no sense, it's not nice. And you're a nice man. Why?" Rozsa then let the tears run down her face once again as she tried to pull away from him, tearing her arms away from him as though he were a fire that had burned her.
To the child's surprise, evidenced by her squeak, Leo pulled her closer to his chest again. He wrapped his green and golden armored arms around her small and fragile frame. The Spartan set the chin of his helmet gently to her right shoulder. "Sorry," he told the still sobbing girl in a tender voice. Leo continued to hold her until she had completely finished. He then picked up his head and rested it against her forehead, while gently stroking her back once again. The Spartan remained that way for a few minutes further, reassuring the girl of his sincerity. Eventually he did release her, allowing the girl to take several tentative half steps back before speaking again. "I apologize, little one. I save you once, and I then find myself the cause of more pain. I promise you though, I won't leave you or Sara. Ever. When I make a promise I fight with everything that makes me who I am until I fulfill it or I drop to the ground. I've never been in this position, spending so much time with civilians like you and Sara. I'm sorry if I hurt you, and I won't blame you for hating me, or not forgiving me. I don't know what makes a person 'nice', or not. Just know that I will do everything I can to keep you two safe. My life is worthless. Your lives? Those are priceless, and I will die if-"
A small fist struck the visor. "Stop. Don't finish what you were gonna say, don't. I don't want you to die, I don't want someone else to disappear forever again," Rozsa told him, cradling the hand she had punched him with. "And I don't hate you." The eight year old child then closed the distance between them once more, and rested her head against his armor. Leo hugged her close for the third time, and locked eyes with the now awake Sara.
The Reach native had a thin smile on her face. Leo should have suspected that she was awake the entire time, if anything she had been acting too hardlike she was still sleeping. Rising up half way she nodded her head once, before her lips moved silently. "Thank you. She trys to hide it, but she's been having nightmares ever since her parents," she mouthed to him. "Good to see that there is a real human being in there. Not just a body pretending to be one."