A/N sorry for the delay! New Year, new chapter.

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"Hang on, explain this part again." Colby shuffled his leg under the table to make himself more comfy for the lecture that was about to be repeated.

"He left here with half a tank. The car was found with, what…" Charlie opened the folder to make sure they could see for their own eyes too. He found the page, turned it and pointed it out to the agents. "…almost three quarters full. Somewhere he had to fill up with gas and he more than likely used one quarter of a full tank to arrive here." He pointed to the desert on the map.

"We get that Charlie but with the car found outside San Diego, that could literally be anywhere." Megan was tired of the circles they seemed to be going round in. Charlie's assertions were rarely wrong, they just needed to know how they fitted in to this case and it wasn't exactly clear to them. To Charlie, who was intent on proving that his big brother had not done this to himself, all seemed clear.

"No, not at all Megan. I've taken in to account that with half a tank he would not have filled up in LA, unless his destination was the desert in the first place, if so then he would have filled up at the closest point to the FBI before heading off. Which would be this station, checking the CCTV should be easy. No, if he was not intending to end up at that desert then this," Charlie circled the place on the map his computer was projecting, "is the most likely destination."

David got up and looked from the map back to the room of agents. "Based on these equations." He tapped the screen where the mathematical symbols meant little to him.

"Expressions." Charlie corrected and was about to continue but Amita realised that his ability to explain this was becoming lost in the emotions he was feeling for his brother.

"What Charlie's done is take in to account many factors. Weather, Don's usual routes, friends, family, time of day, traffic lights, traffic flow, heck what he even usually eats. All these factors have been given a value and this is what we've concluded."

Megan stood up and looked at Colby who, in the wake of Don's reappearance, was a welcome set of hands for all the cases they were juggling now, including Don's. "Do you realise what you're saying Charlie? The doctors said what, Don's wound was most probably sustained on the Friday evening. We know that Sophie Field was in Sacramento. Marcus Field was murdered with the other victims at the abattoir, not his home. For Don to be at Agent Field's house that evening, you are actually implying he was the last one to see him before he died. Do you realise that?"

Charlie stumbled out of his chair. "No, that's not. No I'm not. This is what the numbers tell me. I…maybe Don…Look I don't know but I'm telling you Don's disappearance has something to do with that case."

David looked at Megan and Colby, they were all thinking it but he was probably the only one who was going to say it. Charlie had become too emotional, he was always emotional but he just wasn't as confident in his findings as usual. He looked tired. He looked drawn. Some would say he looked desperate. "Charlie, you're avoiding this I know but none of this explains how Don's vehicle, and traces of Don's blood, were found in a desert outside San Diego. Could it be the connection you're seeing to this case is because of Don's reaction to it? By your rationale Don went to visit Agent Field, Agent Field went to the abattoir to be killed and Don drove himself out to a desert, shot himself and walked to Pasadena. I mean this is getting more and more absurd. I mean are you sure you have enough data, don't you think maybe more data could change this?"

"David, I know you all think I am too attached to this but trust me, I don't let my emotions get in the way of the numbers. Of course more data here would be useful but where am I gonna get it from? Don can't remember. He can't remember what happened to him. I…" Charlie's voice cracked…"I owe it to him to remember for him. And the only way I can do it is by the numbers. All I'm saying is there is a link between that last case and this…"

Megan interrupted Charlie. "What if it's that Don was so depressed about what had happened that he decided to take his own life? Do you want Don to remember that? Whether it's true or not Charlie, you're gonna have to assess what you feel about that if it turns out to be the case. You can't avoid one theory just because you don't like it."

Charlie collapsed back in to his chair and put his hands in his head with a sigh. Amita crouched next to him her arm round his waist for support. After a few seconds he brushed his hair out of his face and looked back at Megan, David and Colby. "Y'know what. It doesn't matter. He's back. If I thought Don did this to himself I would just let it go but I don't think he did and neither, do I suspect, do you. So I'm not gonna stop until I found out who did this to Don. Even if it is simply for my peace of mind knowing that whoever did this won't come back and finish the job."

Charlie got up, picked up his laptop and with Amita following behind, headed out into the bullpen. He saw Liz sitting at her desk checking several files searching for something on his way out. Maybe she understands. Charlie began to walk over to Liz.

"How 'bout you see your brother," Amita suggested.

"In a second," Charlie said as he approached Liz.

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Megan looked round to David and Colby, unsure what to say. Charlie was rarely wrong but he was emotionally attached. There was no way she could avoid that.

It was Colby who broke the silence. "I guess the thing is, even if Charlie's wrong, it's an angle we have to seriously investigate. Let's face it, that doorknock provided no evidence. Nobody saw Don walk to Charlie's house, at least no one who is coming forward. No CCTV has uncovered Don's vehicle route that night. Don doesn't remember and quite frankly the Field case seems to be the priority. If Don is in any way related to what happened to Agent Field we need to investigate it as a priority, not for his case, but for that one."

David sighed and looked at Colby then across to Megan. "So?"

Megan sat down next to them. "So. We bring in Liz. Fill her in David. Colby you should go over any paperwork that Don was doing on his last night. It should still all be on his desk. The techs have looked at some but there's still plenty to go. See if there's anything in there."

David stood up to go talk to Liz. As a parting comment he wasn't sure he should say it, but he also wasn't sure he could avoid it, "So who's gonna mention the elephant in the room?" Megan and Colby both looked away when David mentioned it. "If Charlie's right, then there is a chance Don shot Marcus right? Who's the agent who's gonna have to chase that lead down?"

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It stung for a second and then all Don could feel was relief. The IV was out, hopefully he'd be next. Still, not having pain meds on tap meant his ever nagging headache was going to be extra stubborn. He closed his eyes while the nurse finished the rest of her duties with his body and tried to think himself pain-free.

"Is it working?"

Don's eyes flashed open at the new voice in his room.

"What?"

"Is it working? Whatever it is you're thinking about?"

"Not really. Headache. To be expected though right? I mean a gunshot wound to the head does that right?"

"If that's your subtle way of saying 'why didn't I tell you about your wound' then the answer is simple."

Don adjusted himself in his bed so he could look at his father better as he tried to defend his actions. "Really, go on."

Alan placed his jacket over the chair next to the bed and sat down slowly. "Because, Don, you need to tell us what happened, not the other way round."

"Touché. Megan huh. She's right, anything you tell me will be inadmissible should I actually be required to have a day in court. Still you and I both don't think that's very likely do we?"

Alan frowned at this comment from Don. "Why would you say that?"

"Dad. I'm not the same guy I was a year ago. I mean I am, but I don't know, therapy breaks down walls, you discover things about yourself but it also makes you less tough. Things get to you more. Maybe this case was too much. Agents died. I was responsible. Even Charlie would say the odds are in my favor for doing this to my…"

Alan cut him off, partly because he didn't want to hear Don talk like this and partly because he was wrong. "Actually your brother is possibly the only one seriously considering you didn't do this to yourself. It's not an option as far as he's concerned. I have to say I agree with him. I don't believe it."

"Why? Because I walked all the way to the craftsman? Or because you don't want to think of your son as being weak?"

Alan shook his head and stared directly into Don's pained eyes. "Because I know you. This isn't you. No amount of numbers from Charlie needs to convince me of that. Besides, there's nothing weak about that kind of act, but you're a cop Donnie. You protect people, you've spent your whole life doing it whether or not it's been your job. It's your nature to protect people. Something like that would hurt the people you love. You'd never do that."

Don thought about Alan's words. It didn't make him feel better. If only I could remember. He wanted off the merry-go-round and he wasn't going to get it talking to his father about it so he changed the subject. "So where is Chuck? Think a guy like me would maybe get a few visits once in a while."

"He's…"

"…Whipping up a storm on the chalkboards right. Maybe if you can ask him if I can stay at his tomorrow I might get to see him."

"Tomorrow huh. Already."

"Yup. Bed rest and being waited on hand and foot. Looking forward to it."

"Well it's Charlie's house now, I'm just a boarder. Not sure how good he is at the whole waiting on hand and foot bizzo."

"Well he'll learn. He's had to have paid attention over the years."

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Alan's coat was halfway on when he bumped into Megan leaving Don's room. "Megan, here for social or work reasons?"

Megan patted Alan's arm. "Social mainly. See how he is. But…"

"..but you never stop working do you. Don't have to tell me, I'm the one with the workaholic son who seems to have many ways to get information out of people. I don't know how he found out, but he knows a lot more than I do I think. Not that he remembers it mind, that's still a worry."

"I know Alan. It would certainly help us out too but we can't push."

"I know I know. Hey, look, I'm not sure, he seems a little – off. I know he's been shot and god knows what else but maybe you can wheedle some of what he's feeling out of him. I tried but I think because he's gonna be spending the next few week's at Charlie's he's just taking it slow."

Megan smiled at Alan, "It is Don Eppes we are talking about. International Man of Mystery. Certainly living up to his name on this one, but I'll give it a go. Actually it's Charlie I'm more worried about."

"What?"

"Yeah, he seems pretty stressed," Alan opened his mouth to protest but Megan waved a hand at him to say she wasn't finished. "Hear me out. Obviously he's gonna be stressed but what I mean is he is desperately trying to help but I don't think he's using his math for good here. He's manipulating his data to prove his point. I'm sure he knows he's doing it but he's ignoring some big questions. Well less ignoring and more avoiding. He has to be prepared to hear the truth if it ever outs, not just what he wants to hear."

"I know, he'll get there, he just needs a bit more time. But have you considered maybe you're too detached from this? Charlie knows his brother. You know Don. Do you seriously think he is capable of something like that?"

Megan knew Alan was avoiding using the word 'suicide' and she respected that. "Don's killed many people in his time, don't you think it would be easier for him to kill himself than others?"

Alan just stared back at Megan. Megan herself hated the comment but knew it was the truth. Any one of them would rather die than have to kill but they detached themselves and knew they weren't killing they were saving lives every time they took a life. It was not an easy way to live.

"He didn't do it Megan, that's what I know."

Megan watched Alan leave her heart breaking to think that if Don didn't do it to himself there was a possibility he had killed another agent. She would try and avoid Alan in the future, these conversations were getting harder and harder.

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"My favorite boss, how are you?"

"Favorite, I'm your only boss." Don winced as he pulled himself up into bed, his ribs screaming at him and his hand instantly going to his side once the movement was completed.

Megan handed him a glass of water. "Here, would this help?"

"Thanks. Not really. If it was vodka maybe."

"So."

Don stared back at Megan, he knew why she was here but he was intent on getting more info out of her than the other way round. "So, third or second degree tonight. I have to tell you I am feeling a little sore this evening so be kind to me."

"That'll be the day. So anything come back to you? Anything you can share with a colleague and not a family member?"

Don sipped more of the water and leant back into his pillow. "Flashes. Nothing specific. Mainly more about the Field case I'd forgotten than anything. So you wanna fill me in on this whole 3 days without Eppes business. None of you noticed me missing?"

Megan squinted at Don wondering where he'd got that information. "Remember that?"

"Not in my statement so you know that's a no. Spill the beans, if you don't tell me I'll find out so it's best to come from you where I know it's accurate."

"Hmm, well some of us have lives and don't think about work on our days off. You conveniently went missing over a weekend when we had no new cases so can't help you on that one."

"So what leads do you have?"

"None."

"Nothing huh. So it's looking most likely I slipped on my glock in the shower."

"Something like that."

"Well as long as there's not much paperwork I'm happy."

Megan stared at Don's response. Something was off with him, Alan was right. Why would he be so ready to accept that he did this to himself. That was not Don Eppes. He was too proud to do that let alone admit it. "Your brother seems to think otherwise, he's creating more paperwork than I ever thought could happen."

"Charlie."

"Yes, Charlie. He's on the brink Don. He's so desperate to prove you…that someone did this to you…I have to say there's a lot that can't be explained…but Charlie's gonna make himself sick, or drive us crazy. You need to speak to him."

Don crumpled further into the bed. Charlie. They got on better now than ever before but it was always such a weight to have to negotiate his AND Charlie's emotions in cases. To do it for a case about him, he wasn't sure he was up to the challenge.

"At least make him consider the possibility. A possibility you seem too eager to accept yourself mind you. Between you and Charlie you're both impossible."

Don sighed and looked at Megan. His head ached, his ribs throbbed and he was bone tired. The only thing keeping him going was knowing that the next day he'd be out and people couldn't just drop in on him in his pajamas any time they wanted. Also he'd have pajamas that had a crotch, that was kind of embarrassing. "What do you want me to say Megan? Everyone has such faith in me. My dad. Charlie. My team – excluding present company of course." Don smiled and crinkled his eyes at Megan so she knew he was joking through his labored breaths. "I don't get it. I'm not supposed to get injured, I'm supposed to stop people being injured. Agent Crowther…well, here I am in a hospital and the thought of…the thought of someone doing this…to be a victim. Charlie doesn't understand that. How can I be an agent if I'm a victim? Everyone seems to think that it's the better thought, that someone did this to me. To me, that's the worst case scenario. If I did this, at least I could deal with it. But….well I think you know."

Megan did know. She understood. Crystal Hoyle had changed her life forever. As an agent she was less detached. She still didn't know if she was better or worse at her job, only that she did it differently now. So yeah, Megan knew what Don meant. "Boy, didn't expect Don Eppes, THE Don Eppes, to be giving up that sort of info. Therapy has helped."

Don gave Megan a scarcastic smile. "So you gonna tell me what this has to do with the Field case?"

Megan stared back at Don. How the hell did he always know? The man wasn't an agent, he was a super-agent. No wonder Charlie couldn't explain everything when it came to Don.