beauty that seemed to emanate from you. Suddenly the smile, it was gone from my
sight. I was happy still, I'd only saw it for a small while but it was light. A
door opened in my heart that I must have over look, from the start.
I've always ached for a heart I could never reach, always smiled against the pain
from this love. I just can't seem to tame. I want it more than my own heart will tell.
my own mind eludes me, and leaves me in the dark void I just can't feel my way
out of. It's like a fire burning me deep in my soul, I just can't get it. It's
too out of control. I love you, is this so hard to say? To myself I feel so
ashamed. I'm a man and so are you, does this make me any less in your view? Why?
I question myself night after night, while I watch the sight. Of the man I love in the
crystal moonlight. Why do you put up with me? why do you watch over me? Why
is it when our eyes meet, I almost fall to my feet. In worship of the beauty you
provide. But what can I grant to such a perfect guy? Yes perfect in so many
respects. The perfect solider, with no regrets. I know your not perfect
deep inside, I see it so clearly in those cobalt eyes. I want to reach for the
imperfect you, you try vainly to hid. I want to hold you close at my side, or
under the starlit sky. I love you heero, can't you see? Why my heart aches for
the love that can never be?
I often find I cried, in the middle of the moonlit night. I'm so silent and so
quite as not to disturb the beauty my blurred eyes fall upon.
Still could I ever admit it to you? Would you love me back, or turn away?
Would I feel less a man, to tell you how much I've wanted and planed? For something as
perfect as this love?
I remember one night in December, I'd give you such a gift wrapped in blue paper.
You looked at me strangely as if it was unexpected. I only smiled at you with
the hopes to see you unwrap it. You only stood and dropped the package from you lap.
You looked at me coldly, and stormed off without one word to me. I stood there
in shock of this behavior. I should have expected it, but just the pain, the pain was
so bad. I couldn't stand it any longer I turned and walked away, leaving behind the
package I had been so proud of. I crawled in my bed, and threw the covers over my head
and slept as if none of this counted in my own head. I only had nightmares of a you
that tortured and haunted me. Your silent composure baffling me, and me only wanting
to hear you speak my name.
I laid for a couple of hours in a sleepless state, but suddenly there you were. As
if the demons hadn't pained me enough already. I was already seeking things from
my most intimate dreams. You told me that, you shouldn't have acted like that. The
it was a first. Though I heard it in your voice, you didn't want it to be the last
you handed me something small, something white, wrapped so perfectly it was so bright.
I looked at him as if in disbelief then I saw it. It winked. The necklace I'd given
him. He had opened it after all, I smiled and opened his package it felt so small.
Inside was a locket of gold and diamonds and on the back it read, "to my friend". I
cried so happily. I looked to thank him but he was gone. I mouthed out the words as if in song.
I resume my happy life, to continue to want, to ache, to love the only man who's
long captured my heart in this tangle of red, pink love.
(note: this wasn't good as my frist, i hope you all like it just the same. thank you)