Author's Note: Hey, everybody! I hope you've all had a great week. I'm just glad it's Friday and it's a beautiful and sultry day so far :D So a little bird told me that there's a new iCarly episode being aired this weekend - that's good, right? I won't watch it at the same time as all you lucky people, but I'll get to it soon enough. A special warning to all reading: this is a super long-ass chapter, so make sure you've eaten food and drunken sufficient fluids beforehand ;D A big thanks to sockstar for proof-reading this beforehand and giving me some helpful grammatical tips, you rock :D Hope you all enjoy this.
Disclaimer: I do not own iCarly or the characters - just the plot line (co-ownership with Carl Rahl) and elements of the supernatural used in this story.
"What are we doing in my Mom's bedroom?" Freddie demanded quizzically, slight revulsion evident in his tone.
Of all the places he imagined Michael would take him to, this was the last place he had expected. Knowing that they had used what seemed to be awesome powers of travel and teleportation just to end up back at his own apartment in Bushwell Plaza was a bit of a disappointment for Freddie.
"So glad you asked, Fredward. We are here to find an important item of historical value to your family." Michael declared boisterously, his hand sweeping across the bedroom in a grand gesture.
"In my Mom's bedroom?" Freddie questioned in bewilderment, his eyes reluctantly following Michael's gesture.
Michael began chuckling appreciatively at something Freddie didn't understand until he uttered his next words:
"No. It's in your Mom's underwear drawer. A drawer for her drawers," Michael responded, laughing at his own joke.
Freddie swallowed down bile in his throat at this. Other boys may have had some morbid curiosity about rifling through their mother's things, even going so far as to hide in their closets and try on their clothes. Freddie had no such fantasy or desire to know any of his mother's secrets. But Michael had brought him here because they were certain things that he needed to know about him and Carly 'bonding'. What did that have to do with his mother?
"Why are we really here, Michael?" Freddie asked seriously of the strange man standing next to him.
"We're here because there are some things that you need to know about the process of 'bonding'. I told Carly that sometimes a 'bonding' can be triggered by hereditary considerations too." Michael explained.
Freddie's ears pricked up at this as he gazed at Michael with a questioning look on his face.
"Hereditary considerations? You mean family members can be affected by a 'bonding' too?" he asked quietly.
"Dig deeper, Freddie. There can only be a hereditary consideration if traces of a 'bond' have been passed down to children from their parents." Michael elaborated.
"So you're telling me that mine and Carly's parents 'bonded' just like this?" Freddie asked in alarm, trying to wrap his head around this pronouncement.
"That's what we're here to find out. And the answer's in your Mom's underwear drawer." Michael replied unswervingly.
"Please tell me you're kidding. You seriously want me to sift through my Mom's underwear to figure out whether my parents bonded too?" Freddie spluttered incredulously.
Michael looked up at the ceiling and pointedly rolled his eyes before facing Freddie again.
"Wow. For a smart guy, you sure get a lot wrong," Michael noted.
"Luckily, I can fix that. Your Mom keeps her diary in her underwear drawer," he added more patiently.
"My Mom keeps a diary - this day just gets weirder by the minute," Freddie commented, clearly flabbergasted.
"Well, if you think that part's weird, then you're gonna love what she wrote down," Michael responded with relish.
"I can't do it."
"What do you mean you 'can't do it'? Just reach inside the drawer and take the diary out. It's a medium-sized book bound with soft black leather next to a pile of bikinis your Mom never uses. You can't miss it."
"I can't reach into a drawer filled with my Mom's undergarments just to read her most private thoughts. This is sick and wrong," Freddie protested heatedly.
"Fine. Then we should get out of here right now before you have an asthma attack on the spot. I just assumed that you wanted some real answers about why you and Carly have 'bonded'. Clearly, I was wrong. Let's go," Michael interjected and began walking out of the bedroom.
"Wait!" Freddie called out at the last second, halting Michael in his tracks.
Michael turned around and faced Freddie. He grinned broadly when he saw that Freddie had the diary in his hands.
"I knew you'd come around," he murmured airily.
"Let's just get this over with," Freddie muttered through gritted teeth and sat down unwillingly atop his mother's bed.
Michael relented and made himself comfortable on top of Marissa Benson's bed too while Freddie began paging awkwardly through the pages of his mother's diary.
"What exactly am I supposed to be looking for here? Most of this stuff just looks like lists of protein-based diets my Mom wants to feed me along with a detailed description of a new drug on the market that reduces tick infestations." Freddie complained.
Michael pretended to think it over while pursing a long finger under his chin and tapping the skin softly.
"Start looking at the entries dated back to a year ago, around the time of your near brush with death." He suggested.
Freddie acquiesced and began leafing through the first of the entries labelled with the date '2010'. He felt he was getting warmer when his mother had finally stopped babbling about how 'her poor baby was almost crushed by a truck' to saying things like 'that sassy brunette and her idiot brother who live next door are the reason my baby almost died'. Freddie would've dearly loved to have stopped reading right then and there; he could literally feel the waves of anger pulsing all over at his body at his mother's insistence that Carly was responsible for him diving in front of a taco truck to save her life. But he knew he had to keep reading if he ever wanted to find out the truth about was happening in the here and now.
Then his mother began referring to things that Freddie had never heard of before and in his excitement, Freddie began quoting certain phrases out loud to Michael, forgetting that he must already know everything.
"Hey, listen to what my Mom says here!"
I really wish Freddie would stop wasting his time on Carly Shay. It was different when they were younger and she kept insisting that she only viewed him as just a friend. I figured it was only a matter of time before 1 of 2 things happened: Freddie either moved on for good or Carly finally gave him a chance and they started dating. But I should've known the truth all along – Carly doesn't love my son, she never has. If she did, she wouldn't toy with his feelings like he was a balled-up tissue that she could just throw away any time she liked. If Carly truly loved him, she would've never let Freddie wilfully jump in front of a taco truck for her and almost kill himself in the process…
"Great. We've established that your Mom is a bundle of joy wrapped in layers of honey. Keep reading," Michael implored with an impatient gesture of his hand in Freddie's direction.
…My God. When I think back on getting that call at the hospital during my shift that my baby was hurt, I just spiralled out of control in a fear-filled bubble of panic. And when I saw him lying on the stretcher with cuts and bruises all over his body; his arm bent at a strange angle and the left leg of his jeans ripped and drenched in his own blood, I felt like dying on the spot. I couldn't think and I couldn't move; it was like I was the one lying on a stretcher half dead, not my Freddie. It should've been me that day…it should've been me that day when Jimmy grabbed my hand and stopped me from walking right into that bus…
"My Mom almost got hit by a bus and my Dad saved her life? When did this happen?" Freddie questioned in astonishment.
"On the first day that they met," Michael explained carefully.
"The day they met…My Mom said she almost died on the spot when she first met my Dad. I always thought she meant that she was just really attracted to Dad the first time she laid eyes on him, not that she actually almost died. Why didn't she tell me about any of this?" Freddie demanded seriously of Michael.
"Maybe at first, it was because she didn't think it mattered. I think you'll find that she changed her mind pretty soon after your accident. Keep reading," Michael suggested with another wave of his hand.
Something's changed between Freddie and Carly ever since the accident. She even kissed him, which surprised me even more. And then they were back to being friends again. The only explanation I ever got from Freddie for their sudden break-up was some nonsense about 'foreign bacon'. Freddie may not say it anymore, but he still loves Carly. It's the way he looks at her and sticks close to her no matter what. Jimmy was the same way with me; I used to laugh at him for being so overprotective sometimes. But other days, it wasn't as funny because I felt the exact same way about him, a constant and desperate need to be at his side, a maddening desire to know that he was alright, that everything would be alright.
But Carly's not like my Jimmy – would she really give her own life to save Freddie's? I wish Freddie would forget about her and move on. But somehow, I know he won't. Does that mean it's happening all over again? Is history really repeating itself with my son and his best friend?
"She knew." Freddie murmured after a long pause of not reading anything in his mother's diary.
"But that's impossible. She'd only know based on her own experience with my Dad. Did she know there was a chance that it could happen to me and someone else?" Freddie asked curiously of Michael.
"Every couple that has ever 'bonded' has always had a guardian that appeared to them to explain the nature of the bond along with its various conditions. Every guardian is different; some tell the couple everything there is to know about 'bonding' while other guardians prefer to only divulge the bare minimum of required facts, relying almost wholly on the couple's methods of 'trial and error' when it comes to experimenting with their own powers. Perhaps your parents' guardian belonged to the latter group; based on your Mom's own admission, she guessed at the truth without really knowing it." Michael replied nonchalantly.
"But even if it was just a guess – why not clue me in on it too? How could she keep this from me?"
"For one simple reason: she was trying to protect you, Freddie. Sound familiar?"
"Wait a minute…wait a minute! I can't believe this!" Freddie exclaimed unexpectedly, which caught Michael momentarily off guard.
"What is it, Freddie?" Michael asked curiously.
"My Mom wrote an entry about my Dad's car accident, the night he died. She never told me a whole lot about it because he died when I was about 3 years old. Look at this…" Freddie trailed off as he began reading more from his mother's diary:
If only that ceiling hadn't crumbled on top of me and a couple of other nurses and doctors during that surgery, Jimmy wouldn't have felt the need to come down to the hospital to come get me. He was always telling me that the hospital really needed to have the ceilings fixed before someone got seriously hurt. I wasn't badly hurt that night, I wish I could say the same about my other colleagues though and the patient being operated on. A piece of plaster from the ceiling fell at my feet; bits of it flew upwards and cut me on the cheek. But it was just a scratch compared to everyone else around me.
There was so much blood everywhere; I tried my best to do what I could for them. But I was mentally and physically tired; I just didn't have the strength to do what normally seemed so easy to me. I had taken strain too from all those late-night shifts at the hospital during that week. Jimmy always understood and was happy to stay with Freddie on those nights at the apartment, but I always worried. I hated being apart from them for too long, it made me crazy from how much I missed my family on those nights.
Jimmy was driving too fast that night – I always wished he wouldn't drive so fast when he was goofing off. Freddie used to love watching his Daddy drive; he'd kick his legs out, clap his hands and laugh so hard like he was having the time of his life. Jimmy got a kick out of making Freddie laugh and smile; it made him feel like he was being a good father.
Maybe that's how it happened when Jimmy missed that red light just a few blocks away from the hospital. Maybe he was looking at Freddie when that cab rammed him on the driver's seat of the car. From what the paramedics told me later, the entire right side of the car was smashed in, the left side untouched. God, when I think about what could've happened if Jimmy had buckled Freddie in on the backseat. For once, I was relieved that Jimmy's somewhat precarious nature made him buckle Freddie in next to him in the front passenger seat while he was driving. To think…Freddie was sitting right there when that cab rammed them from the side and killed his Dad…
"Freddie…" Michael trailed off, knowing full what was coming.
Freddie's entire body was rigid with shock while he sat on top of his mother's bed. Her diary felt extremely weighty in his hands, like it suddenly weighed a tonne, threatening to rip his arms right out of their sockets.
"I can't believe it…" Freddie remarked with a hollow laugh.
Then he faced Michael with a grim expression, which made the latter extremely uncomfortable.
"What do you know? I guess my talent of killing people around me started pretty early on in my life…" Freddie joked morbidly with hoarse laughter that didn't quite reach his eyes.
"So let me get this straight: you somehow blame yourself for Sam pushing Freddie down the stairs just because you didn't stop them in time before it happened?" Spencer questioned, trying to wrap his head around this.
Carly sighed loudly while facing her older brother. After she had made up her mind to talk to Spencer about what had happened, she had begun to slowly amend certain things as she went along. With grim satisfaction, Carly realised that she had gotten better at lying ever since that time Sam changed hers and Freddie's grades to A's by hacking into the Ridgeway's online database a lifetime ago. After the way Spencer had reacted over hearing what Rory had done to her, Carly couldn't risk his inevitable anger when he found out about Michael coming into her bedroom or about Michael period. That was something she didn't have the energy for tonight; that would have to wait till she had at least spoken to Freddie, if he ever decided to come back home.
She told Spencer about how she, Sam and Freddie had fallen down the stairs, but omitted telling him about how she had switched Freddie and Sam's positions in mid-air and made them crash-land into opposite inanimate objects in the living room. Then she had told Spencer about how she had begun thinking about hers and Freddie's current dynamic in a new light without mentioning Michael at all or the concept of 'bonding'.
And then the rest became unbelievably easy when it came to explaining her discomfort towards Freddie after the accident. Carly began blushing like crazy when she started talking about how she and Freddie had kissed on the fire escape outside her bedroom window the night before. But Carly rallied beautifully under the pressure and continued with her narrative, ending off with Freddie and Rory's confrontation which led to Freddie leaving the school abruptly (alone, of course) and her own fight with Sam, which had brought her back home.
"That's explains why you were so quiet at dinner last night," Spencer teased lightly in an effort to make Carly feel better after hearing about her kissing Freddie.
"But, Carly. You're looking at this all wrong. This is good news."
"How can any of this be good news, Spencer? I've fought with my two best friends in the whole wide world and they may never speak to me again." Carly responded miserably with her head in her hands.
How Carly managed to keep Michael out of any part of her narrative was a feat in itself. It had taken all of her powers of persuasion that she had at her disposal to centre the problem on hers and Freddie's discord of late. And that in itself wasn't a lie since they were having issues and like every other time, she was to blame.
"Don't you think you're being a little overdramatic?"
"No, Spencer. I really don't think I am."
"Everything's a mess right now and it's all my fault." Carly added morosely, her head sinking back against the couch while she closed her eyes with weary resignation.
"Carly, look at me."
When Carly didn't budge, Spencer sighed and took his kid sister by the shoulders and brought her forward so that he could look at her more directly.
"You're not responsible for what happened between Sam and Freddie on the stairwell. Maybe you could've handled things a whole lot better after that point, but everything before that wasn't your fault. Nor was it Freddie's fault either. From what you told me, it kinda sounds like Sam's responsible." Spencer declared, a little uneasily on the last part.
Carly knew just how Spencer felt in the moment. It made her cringe when she thought of blaming Sam for anything, even when she was clearly responsible. In spite of everything, Sam was still her best friend. And yet, Carly couldn't escape from Sam's innate culpability in the entire debacle.
"I know Sam's your best friend; heck, I've got a soft spot for the kid. But you and I both know that she's not exactly the girl next door, Carly. And she can be pretty volatile when she's around Freddie for what ever reason. Despite your misgivings, Sam's gotta take some responsibility for her actions. And as her best friend, you owe her at least a little honesty. You also owe Freddie a little honesty too," Spencer stated earnestly while resting a comforting hand on Carly's shoulder and squeezing it reassuringly.
"Making up with Sam's the easy part. I know I get mad at her when she does mean things to Freddie and sometimes takes it way too far. But at the end of the day, she's my best friend. But Freddie's different, Spencer. The things I've said and done to him lately – he's given me so many chances in the past. Somehow, I feel like I'm on my last leg with him. The way he looked at me when he left the school was just…" Carly trailed off, a lump forming in her throat while she looked away from Spencer.
"Look, I may not know exactly what kind of 'look' Freddie gave you before he left, but I do know one thing. No matter what's happened, Freddie loves you, Carls. He's been there for you through thick and thin; you don't invest that much time in someone over the years just to give up after one day. If anything, he was probably really freaked out after he knocked Rory unconscious and just panicked when he left the school earlier. Remember when Big Foot came after me in the Mount Baker Forest National Park? I was so freaked out that I just kept running until I got back to Socko's RV. Adrenaline mixed with fear will do that to ya," Spencer reasoned.
"Spencer, we still don't know whether Big Foot really came after you or not."
"It was Big Foot, I tell ya! Why won't anyone believe me about that? Or better yet, why does no one believe me about the Beavecoon that I heard hissing away in a nearby tree?"
"Maybe it's because the Beavecoon doesn't exist."
"It does exist! Head of a beaver, body of a raccoon! What could be more believable?"
Carly rolled her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose.
"Spencer, what were you saying before about Freddie being freaked out?" Carly questioned pointedly, bringing the conversation back to its nucleus, even though it was incredibly awkward to talk about these things with her older brother.
Then again, anything was better than rehashing 'The Legend of Beavecoon' all over again for the hundredth time.
"Oh, right. My point is that you mean way too much to Freddie for him to just give up on you. And he means way too much to you to just let slip beneath your fingers, Carls. Maybe neither of you has all of the logical answers that you're looking for. But sometimes, you've just gotta go with your gut and follow your heart." Spencer continued on more seriously.
"That's really great advice, Spencer. Except, I just can't seem to trust what I really feel around Freddie these days. When he kissed me last night, it was like coming back from that awful 'Root & Berry Retreat' where we were all stuck in a tent overnight in the pouring rain and just being home again. But on the other hand, it made me feel so scared because I've never felt anything like this before, not even when Freddie and I kissed the last time, right after his accident with the taco truck. I just don't know what any of this means." Carly lamented helplessly while resting her elbows on her knees and holding her head in her hands again.
"Carly, I may not know a whole lot about crushes and falling in love. But any time I have a question or any doubts about it, there are always two people who restore my faith time and time again."
"Who?"
"Mom and Dad."
A reminiscent smile appeared on Carly's face when she finally turned and looked at Spencer.
"I know what you mean. So many of my other friends' parents have divorced over the years and then there's both Sam and Freddie who don't have Dads. But whenever I think about Mom and Dad, it always makes me smile. They loved us a lot, but they loved each other even more." Carly stated somewhat wistfully.
"That's exactly my point. What Mom and Dad had was really special, something that only happens once in a lifetime. Do you know how rare that is, Carly? Finding someone who's perfect for you in every way that counts? I know lots of kids say that about their parents, but it was true in our case. Mom and Dad complimented each other in so many different ways; it's like they were totally in sync with each other on every level." Spencer replied seriously.
Something about what Spencer said struck a chord deep within Carly, especially the part about their parents being in sync with each other. Hadn't Michael said that hers and Freddie's hearts had been in sync when she tried to stop him from falling down the stairs? Was this what Michael had been referring to all along when he mentioned the possibility of a hereditary connection with 'bonding'?
"It's so weird to think that Mom and Dad only started dating in their senior year of high school, but they practically grew up together. They even lived in the same neighbourhood. How is it that you can practically know someone your whole life and not fall in love with them sooner?" Carly asked wonderingly.
"From what Dad's told me and the little that Mom told me before she got sick, they just didn't run in the same circles at school. Steven Shay was part of the popular crowd while Taylor Dorfman hung out with the Art students, who were considered to be really uncool. Dad once told me that Mom used to wear this really ugly art smock that was covered in paint stains all over; sometimes she even wore it on days when she didn't have Art class. He thinks she just wore it for the heck of it," Spencer joked, causing Carly to laugh boisterously for the first time that day.
"It's so hard picturing Mom wearing an art smock all the time. As far back as I can remember, she was always so beautiful, graceful and poised." Carly reminisced lightly once she and Spencer had stopped laughing.
"Yeah, that was Mom through and through: a real classy lady. But she also had her fun and creative side, especially when she first taught me how to draw." Spencer replied with a broad smile on his face at the memory.
"It's so weird to think that Mom and Dad barely paid attention to each other at first and then out of nowhere, they just fell in love with each other. How did it happen, Spencer?"
"Has Dad ever told you about that time that he stood up to this bully in school that was hassling Mom?"
"I think so, but only bits and pieces."
"Well, according to Dad, that was the day that everything changed for him. After that day when he finally laid eyes on Mom, he knew that there was no going back after that. He knew he'd never be the same again."
"What happened, Spencer?"
"According to Dad, it was just a normal day at school. He was sitting in the cafeteria with his friends at their regular table. He didn't even see Mom come into that cafeteria when lunch started. He only noticed her afterwards, when this bully named Dwight Richards started hassling this kid named Kenny Schultz, who was kind of a band geek. Dad didn't know Kenny all that well, but Mom was friends with him. Anyway, Dwight was yelling at Kenny and trying to force him to hand over the lunch sitting on his tray that he'd just bought. When Dwight pushed Kenny onto the ground, Mom got in Dwight's face and told him to cut it out; no one else really got up to intervene at that point. Dwight didn't like that at all and he actually went so far as to pull on Mom's arm and twist it back behind her so that it really started to hurt her.
Dad couldn't really explain it at the time, but he found himself on his feet and walking away from his friends to go help. Dad's always been kind of a hard-ass as long as I can remember; but if there's one thing I know he doesn't like, it's a man putting his hands on a woman in any way. And Dwight was a really mean kid. I guess that set Dad off and he decided to put Dwight in his place once and for all. He managed to pull Mom away from the fray and got in front of her so that he could have it out with Dwight. Dad was at least a head shorter than Dwight and Dwight was on the wrestling team at school. But the way Dad dealt with Dwight, Mom always said it was like nothing she'd ever seen before in her life."
"What did Dad do to Dwight, Spencer?"
"I'm not exactly sure; neither Mom nor Dad has ever given me the full details. All I know is that Dad somehow managed to lay Dwight out on the ground, right in front of everyone sitting in the cafeteria. Apparently Dwight got hurt so bad that he got kicked off of the wrestling team and lost out on a scholarship to WSU. Some of the teachers came and separated Dad from Dwight; a really mean History teacher named Mr. Gariboldi gave both Mom and Dad detention for starting the fight before sending Dad and Dwight off to the Nurse's Office.
Mom ended up tagging along with Dad and sat with him the whole time before the Nurse saw to him, holding his hand and stroking his bruised knuckles with her fingers. Dad always said that Mom had this amazing way of keeping him calm whenever he felt angry or scared. And Mom always said that she felt safest when Dad was by her side, keeping her steady and reassured. It started for both of them after that day in the cafeteria." Spencer concluded with a smile.
"Wow," Carly murmured after what seemed like an eternity.
"Yeah," Spencer agreed, matching her tone as they continued sitting together.
"Dad really beat up a guy bigger than him? Was he like…freakishly strong or something?" Carly asked with somewhat of a nervous chuckle.
Carly felt like she was on the cusp on finding out whether her parents really had 'bonded' before her and Freddie and whether they had any amazing powers to go with the unexpected change.
"I wouldn't say that. Grandpa taught him a few Martial Arts moves when he was a kid, when Grandpa was still in the Army. Then Mom and Dad got married pretty soon after they finished high school and he went to the Navy. If anything, I'd say Mom was the one who was freakishly strong out of the two of them," Spencer remarked nonchalantly.
Carly goggled at this and her eyes expanded to the size of saucers at this pronouncement.
"What do you mean?" she asked hoarsely.
"Well, my memory's a little fuzzy and Dad's told me time and time again that I probably imagined the whole thing. But I was about 6 years old and I was goofing off around Mom's closet in hers and Dad's bedroom, the one that she got from Grandma after she passed away. Anyway, my aeroplane went underneath the closet and I crawled halfway underneath to go get it. I think one of the legs on the closet was broken or something, because the closet suddenly collapsed and fell on top of me, trapping half of my body under it."
"Oh my God! Were you hurt?" Carly questioned in alarm, her hands covering her mouth.
"Not really. I freaked out a little because I couldn't breathe in the tight space under the closet and that made me really scared. But Mom was in the kitchen at the time and must've heard the closet collapse. I still don't know how she did it. But she got to me so quickly; either she hopped into the elevator or she just sprinted up the stairs, I'm not sure. After she got into her room and told me to stay calm and promised to get me out, I heard this weird noise a second later, like the wood was groaning in agony above me. Then the wood on the edges of the closet splintered and separated and the closet wasn't on top of me anymore. I heard something crash behind me and Mom suddenly scooped me up into her arms; her hand went around the back of my head while the other hand stayed on my back, and she kept whispering that I was ok over and over again. While she comforted me, I looked behind me and I saw Mom's closet, which had been dismantled completely. Even the legs were ripped off, including the one that collapsed in the first place. It took me close to a minute to realise that Mom wasn't whispering in my ear anymore. I finally looked at her face and saw that she was sobbing quietly; I always thought she was mad at me for playing near the closet.
When Dad got home later, Mom was still crying while I was playing with my aeroplane at her feet in front of this coffee table. I couldn't hear what Mom said to Dad, but he told her everything was fine and that he'd take care of it. I thought Dad would be mad too because he was always telling me not to play upstairs when he or Mom weren't up there with me. But he didn't yell at me or anything. He just picked me up in his arms like Mom did before and kissed me on the forehead before hugging me really tightly till it hurt my ribs. Then he went upstairs and stayed in his and Mom's bedroom for a while by himself. I realise now what he did up there for so long because Mom's closet was gone the next day. He dismantled the rest of it and probably tossed it in the junkyard. Sometimes, it feels like I dreamt the whole thing up. But I swear that it happened." Spencer concluded pensively.
"I believe you, Spencer." Carly murmured without hesitation, her eyes locked on her older brother.
"That you believe, and not something as plausible as 'Beavecoon'. Mom would've believed in 'Beavecoon." Spencer teased, which made Carly laugh, albeit bittersweet laughter.
"Yeah, she totally would've. I just don't get it," Carly stammered in an abruptly sad tone, which caught Spencer's attention.
"What?"
"If Mom could lift something as heavy as a closet off of you, why wasn't her body strong enough to fight off the leukaemia?"
"I don't know, Carls. I guess it's like that old Bible verse: 'the spirit is willing, but the body is weak.' Mom's always been a fighter as far back as I can remember. She never gave up on anything or anyone, not even herself. She fought with her last breath right till the end. And Dad was with her too, fighting the leukaemia right along with her. He only stopped when she asked him to on that last day they spent together in the hospital, when she told him it was time for her to finally let her go. I'm pretty sure Dad broke his promise," Spencer replied with a sad smile.
"I miss her so much, Spencer. It hurts so much that she's gone," Carly responded in a choked whisper as salty tears finally escaped her eyes.
"I know it does, kiddo. I miss her too, every single day." Spencer agreed mournfully.
He didn't offer any resistance when Carly fell into his arms of her own volition while she began crying her heart out for the mother she barely remembered, but couldn't forget.
To Michael's amazement, Freddie began laughing wryly at what he'd just said.
"This is really funny. I said I wanted to know about everything that Carly had been keeping from me lately. But I didn't mean it - I didn't wanna know this," Freddie responded with a vigorous shake of his head while he said it.
"Yes you did, Freddie." Michael persisted patiently.
To Freddie's surprise, Michael got up from his position on the other side of his mother's bed and came to sit next to him in what he considered as an unusual act of solidarity.
"You're right, I did wanna know. I always wanna know things, even things that can probably hurt me. Just like all those times before when I wanted to know if Carly felt about me the way I felt about her. I already knew the answer, I've always known. Just like I should've known I was in the car with my Dad when he died that night. I should've figured that my Mom would keep something like that from me. No one tells me anything for a reason. I can't handle it, especially the fact that I may have killed my Dad." Freddie lamented bitterly.
"Freddie, listen to me. What happened to your Dad was a terrible and tragic accident; you're not to blame. Your Dad was speeding trying to get to your Mom at the hospital, to help her, because of the 'bond'." Michael protested.
Freddie was on his feet again, hot white rage coursing through his veins while he looked at Michael with steely brown orbs.
"The 'bond' – you keep saying that everything that's happened so far is because of the 'bond'! Let me ask you something, Michael: if the stupid 'bond' is so damn special, then why is everything worse than when this all began? Why are Carly and I drifting further and further apart? And if my parents were supposed to protect each other through the 'bond', why is my Dad still dead?" Freddie roared irately.
"The 'bond' is only meant to protect you from supernatural forces or from a supernatural being that attacks you. Your Dad died of a car accident, Freddie. In that instant, a person can still be protected by the 'bond' if their partner is in close proximity to them. Maybe you were only a few blocks away from the hospital, but your Mom was still trapped in an OR with a crumbling ceiling. Your parents couldn't get to each other in time. They were both severely weakened; in your Mom's case, it was mostly mental and emotional. In your Dad's case, he sustained too many external and internal injuries.
I know this is hard to hear, but you need to hear it, so you don't end up repeating the same mistakes with Carly in the near future. You're the only one can who protect her and keep her safe. I know she's been blowing you off lately, but that's only because she's just as scared by all of this as you are, Freddie. The only way to deal with being 'bonded' is by doing it together. Now that you know, you can't turn your back on this and you can't run away. You have to face up to this." Michael concluded vehemently while placing his hands on Freddie's shoulders.
"And just how do I do that?" Freddie demanded, feeling like he had aged about 20 years in the space of a day.
"There's a reason why I haven't you told you absolutely everything about 'bonding'; if you want to know more, it's entirely up to you, Freddie. You need to talk to your Mom about your Dad. Then you need to talk to Carly so that the two of you can figure out what to do next." Michael reasoned.
He finally let go of Freddie's shoulders and gave him some room to collect himself. It took Freddie a good minute before he had finally recovered just enough to get back some of the colour in his face.
"You're right. I have no idea what I'm even gonna do or say, but I have to talk to my Mom and Carly. This has been one screwy day." Freddie noted wearily.
"You're telling me: fighting with the girl of your dreams; discovering that you may be connected to her on a supernatural level; taking on the captain of the football team to defend her honour. I'd say it's been one hell of a day for you, Freddie Benson." Michael praised.
Freddie tried to smile, but he felt sick to his stomach at the thought of hurting Rory. The guilt swam around like bile in his throat while he replayed the grotesque images over and over in his mind.
"There's still something I don't understand though," Michael began pensively after letting Freddie reflect for a moment or two.
"Why did you tell Carly not to touch you after you sent Rory Blake into that row of lockers? For a moment there, it looked like you almost…hated her." Michael declared in bewilderment.
Freddie coloured instantly at this statement, but recovered almost immediately before answering.
"It wasn't like that at all. It's just that…after I let go of Rory, I was still feeling all kinds of things like intense rage and hatred for putting his hands on Carly. In that moment, I felt like I wanted to kill him for trying to hurt her. And when Carly almost touched my arm to calm me down, I was scared that I might…hurt her too the same way I did with Rory." Freddie answered shamefacedly.
Michael didn't say anything, but the look in his eye told Freddie just how well he understood what he was trying to say.
"That's why I had to get out of there, besides being confused about why Carly's been so distant with me lately. And the fact that I probably killed the captain of the football team too," Freddie added.
"All very noble reasons for quitting the scene of the crime," Michael offered lightly in an attempt to cheer Freddie up.
"It is possible, isn't it? That if I can't keep a lid on my emotions, I could end up really hurting someone close to me, even Carly?"
"There are always risks when there's such a strong bond involved, particularly one like yours and Carly's. But I also know that neither you nor Carly are the types of people to wilfully hurt anyone without just cause or good intentions at the heart of your actions. You'll probably just have to work a little harder at keeping a tight rein on your more base instincts on those days when the power of the bond affects your bodies and minds more potently."
Freddie nodded grimly at this before he spoke again.
"I can't change what I did to Rory. He's a jerk, but I never meant to hurt him. No matter what happens from here on out, I need to own up to what I did." Freddie declared as steadily as possible, even though he could feel his whole body shivering.
"I'm glad you feel that way, Freddie. Because Rory's not dead," Michael interjected brightly.
"I guess I've gotta head back to school in the morning and talk to Principal Franklin about – wait, what?"
"You can relax. You didn't kill Rory."
"Wait! Rory's really ok?"
"The champ's gonna be just fine. I hate to disappoint you, but you didn't really do that much damage after all. But if you ever wanna turn Rory Blake into a corpse for real, you have to put some action behind those muscles next time. You have to really mean to hurt him."
"That sounds like something out of 'Harry Potter."
A brilliant smile appeared on Michael's face and he began laughing heartily.
"I like you, Freddie Benson. For a shrimp, you're kind of bad-ass. You've got a lot of balls, kid." Michael praised, which bordered on grim respect.
"Thanks…I guess." Freddie replied abashedly.
"Don't thank me yet. There's one more thing I have to tell you before I go."
Freddie was thrown by this unexpected response, but waited for Michael to speak again.
"For the time being…until you and Carly get a better handle on your 'bond', I think it's best not to be too emphatic about your new powers, especially by telling anyone else just yet." Michael began severely.
"So we can't even tell Sam and Spencer about it, if necessary?" Freddie asked in disappointment.
"I suppose it's alright to tell the two of them. But no one else, do you understand?"
"Sort of. But just so I know – what would be the consequences if either Carly or myself happened to let it slip to anyone else outside of Sam and Spencer?"
Michael stepped closer towards Freddie till he towered over him, a bright smile on his face that made Freddie cower back slightly in fear.
"Let me put it this way, Freddie. If either you or Carly were to brag about or broadcast your powers in any way, you might end up drawing a lot of negative attention to yourselves by certain individuals whom you wouldn't want to meet under ordinary circumstances, much less ones of a supernatural nature. People with special abilities are always naturally drawn to each other and both you and Carly could be forced to use your powers in a way that has absolutely nothing to do with protecting each other through your mutual bond." Michael replied in a cryptic tone that made the hairs on Freddie's back stand straight up.
"You mean we'd have to use them to protect ourselves to stop other people with supernatural powers from attacking us?"
"Exactly. The powers of a 'bond' are only meant to be used in extremely dangerous situations where one or both of the parties are at risk. Sometimes the powers can be used and extended when friends or family members are also in danger, maybe even an innocent civilian or two. But if you were to use those powers for anything else – if someone forced you to use them for any other purpose apart from that, the consequences could be deadly, Freddie. Adrenaline-based energy only works to a certain point; if used in excess, it can drain the life forces of people around you and eventually, the user too."
"So if Carly and I ever let anyone else outside of Sam and Spencer in on our little secret, other supernatural beings with special powers and abilities could…come for us? Collect us and maybe use our powers against us to hurt other people? And Carly and I could die too if we overstep the limits of the 'bond'?"
"Something like that. So do yourself a favour and make a point of figuring out early on who your true friends are and who those people are who may possibly hurt either you or Carly. Oh, and Freddie? Could you make sure you pass that last piece of my message onto Carly too? I'd hate it if the two of you were ever caught off guard by another supernatural being only too eager to use you and your abilities for any…untoward purposes." Michael concluded with a grim smile on his face.
"Till we meet again, Freddie Benson. Adieu."
In blur of swirling black, Michael disappeared in a flash. With sudden disappointment, Freddie realised that he never got a chance to ask Michael just what kind of powers he and Carly had now. Then the disappointment was replaced with resolution as he thought about what he had to do next.
Carly and Spencer had been sitting together the entire time on the living room sofa, hugging each other quietly without exchanging any words. Carly felt bad for ruining Spencer's favourite T-shirt which said 'Socko's My Guy', but Spencer didn't seem to mind. Carly and Spencer both smiled at each other when he finally let go of her.
"You feeling better, kiddo?" Spencer asked kindly of Carly.
"A little bit. Thanks, Spencer."
"For what?"
"For just…being you." Carly responded earnestly.
"Anytime. I'm gonna go make some chicken soup – you want some?"
"Thanks, that'll be great."
"Ok, coming right up." Spencer concluded with a big grin on his face while getting to his feet.
Carly watched Spencer bustling about in the kitchen when they both heard three loud raps on the front door. They instantaneously looked up at each other.
"Are you expecting anyone?" Carly asked of Spencer.
"Uh uh."
"I'll get it," Carly responded hurriedly before hopping off of the couch.
She couldn't understand why her heart was fluttering like a little girl jumping over a skipping rope. All she knew for certain was that it was important that she answer the door before the person on the other end gave up and left again. Of all the nights that Spencer decided to lock the door…
"Coming," Carly called out breathlessly and ran a hand through some of her dark tresses which had matted together against her cheek because of her tears.
Then she opened the front door with a sweeping gesture of exhilaration, only for her relief to be replaced by sudden disenchantment.
"Oh…it's just you."
Author's Note: Oops, I did it again: another strange cliffhanger. Now who could possibly be at the door this time? Magic Malika perhaps? Hee hee, just kidding on that front. A big thank you to One Horse Shay and his wonderful story called "iCarly's Father" on creddiefans; I got inspired by his flashback of Carly's parents in there that I sampled it for this story. Some details are different in my story, but his story really helped me in a big way with characterisation, especially for Taylor Dorfman. Spencer's flashback about his mother and Marissa Benson's diary entires are totally my own creation though ;D I might be posting One Horse Shay's fic on my FF profile one of these days because he doesn't have his own FF account. If I do, keep an eye out for it, it's a fantastic Creddie story.
For baronvonmilo's audio pleasure, check out Kris Allen's 'I Need To Know' (another find from 'Vampire Diaries') - it sets the mood for this chapter quite well ;D
Thank you so much for all the reviews last weekend and this week that brought the reviews for this story up to a grand total of 108 - congratulations to sweetStarre123 for being the 100th reviewer, don't spend the prize money all in one place ;D I really hope you all liked this new update, probably 3 more chapters to go before this story's finished. Have a great weekend, cheers!