Chapter 5: Fight & A Sleepless Night
You painted me in pastels,
colors that don't tell of any boldness.
'Cause that's the way you'd love to see me:
so delicate, so weak, so little purpose.
-=-
The room was so quiet you could have heard a pin drop.
No, it was even quieter, Rin decided. You could have heard the world's lightest feather fall into a pile of specially designed shock-absorbing cotton balls.
"Are you going to go after him?" Kagome asked after a few more moments of the tense silence.
"Keh. Don't waste your time on that heartless basta-"
"Inuyasha!" The look in Kagome's eyes was downright scary as she turned to smack her boyfriend's arm.
A slight frown formed on Rin's lips as she thought over her friend's question. Did she want to go after Sesshomaru? Not particularly. It had been easy to see that the artist was keeping a tight lid on his anger while he was in the apartment and Rin really didn't want to be around him when that anger was released.
On the other hand, he certainly would not be expecting her to follow and it was probably her best opportunity to work away at that flat, stony exterior of his. Especially since his anger had already formed some major cracks in the surface.
Yes, Rin decided, she would go after him...and pray to Kami she make it out alive.
"I'm following," she spoke suddenly, catching the attention of the quarrelling couple seated across from her.
Kagome beamed at her friend, obviously pleased with her decision, "Good for you, Rin! Do you want to borrow my car?"
Shaking her head, Rin replied "No thanks, I'll walk. It'll give me a chance to work up my anger." She grinned wickedly before bouncing out of her seat and towards the hallway where she slipped on her shoes and light jacket.
"Hey, Rin?"
Hand on the doorknob, Rin turned back upon hearing Inuyasha's voice.
"Give 'em hell."
Rin smiled innocently but her eyes twinkled with mischief, "Will do."
She had to hide in the bushes outside until a middle-aged couple came out through the doors, giving her an opportunity to slip inside undetected.
The grumpy toad man must have been given the night off. Alone, Rin easily rode the elevator to the top floor and stormed down the hall with a purpose until she reached her destination and banged on the heavy doors. Not bothering to wait for an invitation and assuming he still neglected to lock the doors, she pushed the thick wood aside.
The top of his silvery head was just visible over the back of the chair he sat in, facing the blank screen of a plasma T.V. mounted on the wall.
She didn't stop until she came around the chair and stared down at him, hands on her hips, waiting for an explanation. After the long walk, her legs ached and her feet were crying in the uncomfortable dress flats she had stupidly decided to wear that evening. The wind had ruined her nicely straightened hair and a taxi almost ran her down when she tried to cross the street. All in all, she was good and angry...and ready to take it out on Sesshomaru.
His face was blank, as usual; the only indication that he was upset being the small crystal glass of alcohol in his hand. He downed the remainder of the drink – scotch she could only assume from the warm smell that made her nose prickle – before turning serious amber eyes on her.
"Rin."
It was a command and a question, somehow all rolled into her short little name.
"Do you have any idea how embarrassing that was?" She used his opening to launch right into her rant, "You couldn't be civil with your half-brother for one night, for Kagome's sake? For my sake, too?"
He gazed at her with unwavering eyes and a face of perfect indifference. "Inuyasha," he started slowly, "is nothing but a pain in my side. I want nothing to do with him."
"Yeah, I think you made that much clear." Rin replied with heavy sarcasm. "Listen, I know about your past," she made sure not to mention that the information came from Kagome who heard it from Inuyasha, "and I am sorry. You obviously had a tough childhood, but you know what? I had one too! I was alone and unwanted and there were times when I questioned whether it was all worth it. If I was nothing but a burden, then why continue on? "
Tears were threatening to spill over now as the darker moments of her childhood played through Rin's mind. Her chest felt heavy and her voice cracked with emotion when she began to speak louder, "Eight! I was eight years old when my family was killed! But you know what? I pushed forward because I knew my mother would have been disappointed in me if I quit. So I put up with it, being shuffled from foster home to foster home, always being tolerated but never really loved.
So don't you dare talk to me about tough childhoods. Your father left your mother. It happens to millions of kids and yes it's awful but you work through it and go on with life. It's time to let go of that grudge!"
Rin's voice was raw by the end of her speech. She sucked in a few deep lungfulls of air and then bravely met Sesshomaru's gaze with her own strong and steady glare.
His face hadn't moved an inch, but the angry fire burning in his eyes nearly made Rin whimper in fear. In one fluid motion, he stood and seized her shoulders roughly.
"I do not know where you obtained that information," Sesshomaru's voice was low and rough, as if he were struggling to control it, "but I do not appreciate the assumptions you've made."
"Then explain it to me!" Rin shouted, flinching as his grip on her tightened to the point of painfulness.
His head shook, sending long silvery hair falling over his shoulder to brush softly against her cheek. Rin was suddenly very aware of his closeness; their noses nearly touched as he stared at her with pure fury and she looked back with stubborn anger.
"It is none of your business," he snapped, annoyance seeping into his voice now, "you nosy, infuriating girl."
"If you don't like my nosiness, you shouldn't have accepted my offer!"
"Your offer was absurd."
"Then why did you agree?"
"I was foolish. I made a mistake." Burning amber eyes closed with regret for a few moments before returning to her face.
"So this is a mistake?" Rin tried to gesture between them but her arms were being held at her sides by Sesshomaru's hands that had slid down off of her shoulders. She settled for tilting her head towards him to get her point across.
"Of course. This – we," Sesshomaru stopped, taking a moment to breathe and control his anger before he continued in a much tamer voice, "we are not... natural."
The look he gave her was almost one of exasperation. "You are nothing but an endless source of migraines. Obviously two people who irritate each other to the point of insanity are simply not meant to be together."
"If that's really what you think, then why haven't you pulled away?" Rin questioned softly.
"I tried," his mouth formed a tight, grim line, "and then you came into my home uninvited and persuaded me into attending that godforsaken dinner."
"That's not what I meant." Rin gave a tiny smile and turned her head to look down at his hands still gripping her upper arms.
He stepped back so quickly, Sesshomaru nearly tripped over the chair behind him. A string of curses flew from his mouth and Rin had to press a hand to her lips to keep from laughing.
"You find that funny?" His voice was cold and sharp as a knife.
"Yes, as a matter of fact, I do." Rin replied, paying no attention to the danger radiating from him. She was beginning to think that Sesshomaru was all bark and no bite. Crossing her arms, she tilted her head to the side and challenged him: "So what are you gonna do about it?"
A low, angry growl rose in his chest and in two long strides, he had come to stand directly in front of her. He stared down in silence, searching her face as if it held all the secrets of the universe. Maybe it did, as far as he was concerned.
Then, before Rin could even register what had happened, his mouth was on hers. It was a hot, searing kiss that conveyed all of his anger and frustration. Rin could do nothing but cling to him, dizzy with pleasure.
Within a few moments, she regained control of her body and met his kisses eagerly. Sesshomaru's mouth was hot and relentless against hers and Rin poured all of her own anger through her lips, winding an arm around his neck while the palm of her other hand lay flat against his chest, feeling the rapid thumping of his heart.
His arms locked around her waist, securing her tightly against him and forcing all the air from her lungs. Rin's fingers threaded through the fine hairs at the base of his neck and she gave a little tug as if to punish him. Let me breathe! In reply, Sesshomaru growled and caught her bottom lip between his teeth, biting down just enough to make her gasp.
Inevitably they separated for air. Although, at that moment, Rin was quite content with dying from lack of oxygen if it meant that she could stay pressed against him.
Her eyes were huge and her lips were swollen while Sesshomaru was still as composed as ever, though his hair had been mussed by her hands and his eyes were a dark liquid gold that showed pure, unashamed desire.
"Sessh-" Rin began to speak his name but she was silenced by Sesshomaru's next move.
He bent his head to press his face into her hair while his hands moved in soothing circular motions along her back. It was such an easy, intimate gesture (two words she never thought she would be using to describe Sesshomaru) that it brought a surge of love through her whole body.
"Don't," his voice was muffled through her thick, dark tresses, "don't ruin it with your talking."
"Hey!" Rin tried to shove him away, insulted.
She only succeeded in loosening his grip a small amount. It was all the space she needed though, as she pulled back and aimed a punch directly at his face.
He blocked her fist easily, of course, but then the full extent of her actions hit her. Rin's eyes widened and her mouth formed a small 'o' of surprise.
"Rinnn..." His voice warned darkly.
"I-I'm sorry," she said weakly, "you deserved it, but I'm still sorry."
"Stop," his serious face was only inches from hers, eyes sparking with an emotion she could not identify, "talking".
Rin didn't need any more encouragement. She closed the distance between them and kissed him sweetly, offering an unspoken apology. Sesshomaru accepted, allowing her to take the lead if for only a moment.
When she pulled back fairly quickly, Sesshomaru growled in protest and bent towards her, determined to keep hold of her lips.
"I should let you shut me up more often." Rin grinned, speaking in a breathy tone.
"Stop it," His eyes danced with golden fire, "or I will be forced to use firmer methods to shut you up."
A shiver of excitement ran down Rin's spine. Her legs felt like jelly and her heart was threatening to jump right out of her chest. Her body felt like it was ready to explode into a shower of excitement and nerves, and she was more than ready for it.
Wetting her suddenly dry lips, she gathered all her courage and looked him straight in the eye, "Firmer methods, hmm? Good, because I feel like talking."
Oh that was lame. Would he think it was lame? Rin was hardly a master of dirty talk; she was an elementary school teacher, for crying out loud! She had been trained to say 'darn' over 'damn' and 'silly' over 'stupid'. Plus, Sesshomaru had that naturally deep baritone voice that could make a toaster manual sound sexy. So not fair.
Apparently she said the right thing to set the mood because Sesshomaru captured her mouth roughly and picked her up with ease, allowing Rin to instinctively wrap her legs around his waist and her arms around his neck.
In a few long strides they reached his bedroom. Sesshomaru kicked the door shut with his foot and then their night truly began.